thank you for the feedback on the first 2 parts, i really appreciate it <3
okay so, these are the options i have so far. i'd really like to make the last part of this mini-series with content that y'all would like. If you'd like to see other stuff, pls comment them or send them through requests if you want to do so anonymously :)
these options include angst, fluff & smut.
minors/ageless blogs dni
You will be missed by many Chadwick! Thank you for such an amazing experience with Black Panther!❤️🥺
Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem! Reader AU: Soulmate AU CW: Language, Genre: Angst with a happy ending (don't worry guys) Summary: You make Sirius realize that having a soulmate isn’t all that bad— that he too, will have his happily ever after.
Note: One of my favorite tropes to write, soulmate AUs! Sirius just needs love and affirmation. I love writing for this! Enjoy! Picture is from pinterest, credits to the owner!
You know, Sirius never really believed in those pesky soulmates stuff. It irks him to no end, and makes his head hurt.
The topic makes him snappy, bitter, and it leaves him feeling angry. To whom? The world— the one who’s responsible for everything that has to do with soulmates. He thinks it is a bunch of bollocks. It’s a pathetic little concept that everyone seems to be too invested in.
Sirius would be very much happy to tell you it doesn’t really end with a happily-ever-after.
“I’m telling you, Prongs. It’s just a bunch of crap.” Sirius tells James one time at the drawing room in the Potter Manor. James shakes his head, disagreeing with his best mate.
“It isn’t always like Walburga and Orion, Pads.” James gently tells him, eyes swimming with empathy for Sirius. “Just look at me, Lily and I are together, finally.” Sirius can’t help but scoff, shaking his head in a disagreeing manner.
“That’s because you were already pathetically in love with her before you even knew she was the one, Prongs. Same thing for Lily, but she was quite stubborn trying to deny what she felt about you. You guys are actually made for each other.” James lets out a laugh, the memories resurfacing making a love-struck smile appear on his face (Sirius gave him a disgusted look)
“That’s what soulmates are, Pads. You’re supposed to complete each other, balance the other person out” He pursed his lips and sighed, there’s no way Prongs could understand his opinion on the matter.
Complete each other, huh?
Then can someone give him a reasonable excuse on why his parents broke each other? One descended into madness; the other doesn’t really seem to care as long as the noble house of Black lineage will continue.
Sirius bites his bottom lip, deep in thought as he stares at his pinky, willing the connection to be seen; a red string that was tied into a bow that leads to Merlin-knows-where. It serves as a connection; the string that he and only his soulmate can see whenever they want. He tugs on it curiously, awaiting any reaction with bated breath. He almost scrambled away when he felt the other end also tug it. Sirius was utterly terrified, a shiver crawled up to his system, it’s foreign feeling for the Black’s eldest son. It made everything feel too real. A fact that he desperately tries to deny.
That night, before they returned to Hogwarts as sixth year students was the last time he ever willed to see the annoying little string in his pinky, not caring if his supposed other half was finding him or already found him.
Maybe it had to do with his twisted upbringing. He saw how his father cut the string tying him to their mother, the purple string that bound them together turning gray and withering away.
He saw how Regulus flinched, no one should’ve seen a scene like that, but they did. Someone severing their connection to someone who should’ve been with them through better or for worse, the one that fate intended for them. Their life got worse just after that, forcing him to flee and leave his younger brother behind at the deranged hands of Walburga Black.
“You should eat more, Reggie.” You turned towards the quiet and reserved Slytherin, pushing his plate closer to him, which made him wince. “I am quite full.” You raised a brow “None sense, all you did was sip pumpkin juice so you better do as I say or I’ll tell Evan and Junior.”
“Do you know that you boss people around quite well?” He grumbles, shoving a few spoonsful of dinner in his mouth as you hummed in approval, cracking a small smile. “I was told.” Your eyes flickered to the Gryffindor table, it seemed to gravitate you, pulling you in.
Looking down at your pinky, you willed the string to be visible to you. Seeing the red string attached to Sirius Black made your stomach churn; was it butterflies? Unease? You don’t particularly know, having mixed reactions to the string that leads to your other half.
You’ve known for over a year now, keeping it to yourself as you quickly figured out that he wants nothing to do with his soulmate.
“Reggie! Reggie!”
You exclaimed, slapping the poor boy’s arm as he was currently staying in the L/n Manor. He looked in your direction, quite annoyed, he was interrupted reading his book. “I’m reading, Y/n. You know, you should too. It’ll do you some good.” He sassed, trying to find which part he stopped reading. “My soulmate! They tugged the string!” You gushed, “They must be looking for me too, right?” You asked no one in particular, you can still feel the tingles you felt, how your heartbeat picked up, and how you felt like you were in could nine.
Quite the opposite from what Sirius felt, huh?
You never told him, never planned to. It was quite clear what his views are on the concept of soulmates when you saw him snogging different girls every week. It wrecked you; you swore you felt your heart stop beating every time you see him loving a girl other than you even just for a week. It sounds stupid and all, but you would give up everything just to know what it feels like; how he will look at you with love and adoration in his eyes, how his touch and kisses would linger on your body, and how his voice would sound like as his breath fans in your ear, whispering promises of love.
You looked at him from the Slytherin table; so close yet so far.
Regulus noticed, the all too familiar broken look in your face. His heart hurts for you, even if you do not tell him, he already knows. Seeing his brother’s indifference, Regulus’s gaze hardened. How could he have the guts to do this to his soulmate?
The memory of their mother's despair, the way she withered away after their father severed the bond, was etched into his mind. Regulus does not wish for anyone to feel that way, he does not wish upon it even in his worst enemies.
It was a pain no one should endure, a lesson that should have been learned.
Yet there sat his brother, laughing with his friends and willfully ignoring the pulls of his heart. The person who held the other end of this unseen tether, was beside Regulus. Your soul ached as you watched your soulmate. It was a betrayal of the heart's deepest connection, and it stirred a tempest of fury within Regulus that he struggled to contain.
“My brother is foolish. Eat.” He states, pushing your food and placing the cornbread on his plate to yours. She cracks a smile, chuckling. “Alright, Reggie. You’re lucky I love you.” You pat his curls, proceeding to eat the bread, smiling a little. Reggie never really shares his food with anyone, except for you. You’re the only exception.
“Padfoot.” Remus starts, looking out of the window as Sirius lays down lazily in his bed, looking at nothing.
“What, Moons?”
“If I say that I have an inkling on who your soulmate is, would you… look for them?” Remus asked cautiously. Peter and James perked up, eyes wide with shock. How could Remus possibly guess who his soulmate is? Unless… They’re also in Hogwarts?
“Don’t start with that crap, Moony.” Sirius sat up; a scowl displayed in his features as his grey eyes turned stormy.
“Don’t you even feel the slightest amount of guilt in your system as you snog other girls?” Remus frowned.
Sirius’s scowl deepened, his hands clenching into fists. “Guilt? For what, Moony? For not wanting to be chained down by some ancient magic?” His voice was a low growl, barely containing the emotions that surged within him. “I won’t be dictated by fate. I make my own choices, and I refuse to be bound by a bond I never asked for.”
Remus’s expression softened, the lines of concern etching deeper into his face. “It’s not about being chained, Pads. It’s about finding someone who complements you, who understands you in ways no one else can.” He paused, his gaze steady and piercing. “You’ve seen what happens when that bond is severed. You’ve seen the pain it causes. Is that what you want for yourself? For your soulmate who’s probably hurting somewhere?”
Sirius looks down, biting his lip and playing with the rings on his fingers. “I don’t plan on severing our bond, Moons- “
“Then what the fuck are you doing?” Remus spat, Sirius flinched, looking at anything but them. He knew deep down that Remus was right. He can’t deny he also wants to look for his soulmate. The only thing that was holding him back is that he’s scared. What if your story would end similarly like how Walburga and Orion’s did? Dread fills his system as he reflects on how he slowly realized he’s becoming like his father. Peter and James exchanged a glance, the weight of the conversation settling heavily upon them.
“I’m scared,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “Scared of finding her… Scared of repeating the same mistakes.” He paused, his gaze lifting to meet Remus’s. “But you’re right. I can’t keep running from this. It’s not fair to them, and it’s not fair to me.”
James offered a supportive smile, feeling happy for his friend. Sirius stood up, his posture straightening as if shedding the weight of his fears. “I’ll do it. I’ll find her,” he declared, his voice steady. “I owe it to both of us to at least try.”
“That’s our Padfoot.” Remus breathes a sigh of relief as Peter nods encouragingly at Sirius.
The next daylight soon came. Sirius gulps, looking around the great hall, feeling quite overwhelmed at the number of students entering for breakfast, eating, or chatting amongst themselves. For the first time in a long time, he willed the red string of fate to reappear within his vision.
Ah, there it was. The red string connected to someone from the Slytherin table. Sirius felt his heart drop, seeing the end of the string connected to your pinky. “Y/n?” The name left his lips in a hushed awe, his heart skipping a beat as he saw the string connected to your pinky. You, who laughed with such ease beside Regulus, were the missing piece.
Whether it was some brotherly instinct, Regulus looked at him, shooting him a warning stare as if to say: ‘If you hurt her, you’ll never see the light of day ever again.’
Remus raised his eyebrows in surprise, knowing eyes set on his friend. “Found her, Pads?”
“Yeah. Found her, Moony.”
“Then what are you waiting for?” James chimed in, a grin spreading across his face as Peter silently cheers him on. “Go on, before you lose your nerve.”
Sirius took a deep breath, trying to shake off the weight of Regulus’s protective stare. It was a silent challenge, a vow to keep your heart safe from his brother. With a nod of acknowledgment, Sirius stepped forward, crossing the small distance between the Gryffindor table and Slytherin.
“Y/n,” he said, standing before you, the red string pulsing with a life of its own.
You stilled, slowly looking in his direction. Eyes wide with surprise, searched his for a moment before softening. “I was wondering when you’d come around,” you teared up, making Sirius’ heart ache.
Sirius extended his hand, the red string wrapping around both your destinies. “Let’s talk, yeah?”
And in that moment, as your fingers intertwined, Sirius knew that whatever the future held, he had made the right choice. For in finding you, he had found a new path that began to unravel, one filled with hope and courage. The buzz of Great Hall continued, but both of them felt time still, feeling the bond weave into their souls deeper.
Sirius’s and Y/n’s story had its flaws, but it was theirs, uniquely woven by the red strings of fate.
hi so. this album is everything and as such, i figured that i would do my first ever album collection to pair with such a masterpiece! olivia rodrigo truly can create such masterful storytelling - and i think all i can offer in repose to you all are some fics!
i’ll do the best i can to do a fic a week, if i get derailed you MAY bully me but only lightly because my ego is fragile and i will cry. unless you like roast me artfully then i’ll just be impressed aNYWAYS, here we go!
brutal - harry potter x reader
traitor - james potter x reader
driver’s license - kit walker x reader (non hp!)
1 step forward, 3 steps back - remus lupin
deja vu - fred weasley x reader
good 4 u - roger davies x reader
enough for you - charlie weasley
happier - george weasley x reader
jealousy, jealousy - steve harrington x reader (non hp!)
favorite crime - fred weasley x reader
hope ur okay - sirius black x reader
tagging some moots to spread the word! 🌸 @cherrybarzy @anchoeritic @tatesimper @kitwalker02 @billyhxrgrove @wandsandwheezes @lumosandnoxwriting @feetoffthetablee @harrysweasleys @sinfulweasley @sunrisefairy @diary-of-an-onliner
prologue // p1 // p2 // p3 // p4 // p5 // p6 // p7
Remus Lupin x whimsical!reader - Hogwarts Era (no Voldemort) - Soulmate AU
CW: angst, discussion of Black and Crouch shitty parenting, accidental attempted drowning/belief of drowning -> please note: there are always happy endings here on ellecdc
Amelia Bones didn’t like to think of herself as a particularly stupid girl, but she couldn’t deny she probably looked pretty foolish right now.
She was just about as pathetic as any school-aged girl got over their first crush – which was to say was very pathetic. The worst part of all of it was that she really sort of did this to herself.
She couldn’t deny that Remus had always been very clear that he was interested in nothing more than casual sex; he never invited her to breakfast, he never asked her out on dates, he never even invited her to parties. But that never stopped her from wanting those things.
And for a while, she was able to pretend it was fine.
She was able to pretend that when he didn’t kick her out of bed right away and allowed her to stay the night, that it meant he actually wanted her there. She was able to pretend that when he approached her at a party, it was because she had always been his first choice. She was able to pretend that when he grabbed her and rushed into a broom closet, it was because he just couldn’t stop thinking about her and needed her just as desperately as she needed him.
But she was only fooling herself.
And to add insult to injury, it appeared that Remus wasn’t completely averse to feelings, relationships, or dating; he just didn’t want that with her.
“And have you noticed how sweet he’s been on that freak L/N?” Shirley sneered from Amelia’s left as they all watched Remus smile sweetly at you and pass you a cup of something at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall.
“You should start offering palm readings, Amelia. Maybe then he’ll find you odd enough to keep around.” Added Silas, earning snickers from the entire friend group.
“Ha ha.” Amelia deadpanned, tossing her half-eaten toast onto the plate in front of her.
The bitter taste followed her around all day after that. She swore she could hear the sounds of Remus and his friends snickering all day, and if she happened to hear your serene voice echoing in the hallways, she knew that chances were that Remus wasn’t too far behind.
Remus was everywhere; and wherever she was able to avoid him – you seemed to show up. As you walked into the library in which Amelia was currently holed up in, she swore she was a thestrals hair away from using her quill to put herself out of her misery.
Amelia was able to see her friends from her current table but had opted to sit on her own in order to focus on the difficult Care of Magical Creatures essay, knowing that sitting with Silas would result in a rowdy game of gobstones in no time – library or not.
“Oi! L/N! What kind of voodoo spell did you cast on Lupin, huh?” Shirley called to the girl, earning her a round of snickers from the friend group. Amelia cringed, noting that you were currently alone and very clearly minding your own business.
“Hello Shirley.” You offered, albeit much less jovially than your usual sunny disposition.
“She asked you a question, freak.” Silas barked aggressively.
“Oh, leave her be.” Coraline chided in faux sympathy. “We all know she doesn’t have the attention span for voodoo practices; she’d need a brain larger than a goldfish for that.”
You looked away from the group who were now all belly laughing at your expense when your eyes met Amelia’s; her gaze already trained on you.
“Hello Amelia.” You said softly with a gentle smile gracing your lips as you approached her table. Amelia regarded you cautiously, though she hated to admit that she found it extremely difficult to feel defensive in your presence.
“Hi Y/N.” Amelia sighed, looking back down to her textbook.
“Have you gotten far on the essay?” You asked kindly, peering over Amelia’s textbook. She really wanted to be vexed at your intrusion in her studies, at her table, in her life, but she found she really couldn’t muster the effort.
“No... I, uhm. I’m finding this quite difficult, honestly. I’ve still got a foot of parchment to go.” She admitted begrudgingly. You hummed in agreement.
“It likely doesn’t help that it requires an understanding of the mating habits of the frost snails, which we haven’t covered in class.”
Amelia’s head snapped up to consider you. “Really?”
You nodded.
“Helga...I thought I had lost the plot! I was certain I had missed something in class to feel this lost.” Amelia admitted looking back down at her parchment feeling slightly elated to know that she at least wasn’t a complete fool in this area of her life.
“You can find everything you need to know on page 246; the rest of your paper should come along nicely.” You offered, smiling kindly at her. Amelia was sort of annoyed at the pleasant feeling that you elicited from her, but again she couldn’t muster up the energy to be particularly vexed.
“Thank you, Y/N. I would have been quite lost without your help.” She relented.
Your smile grew at that as you stood taller, preparing to walk away. “Oh, I’m sure you would have managed just fine Amelia. You’re quite the witch, you know.”
And with that, you floated away.
Amelia supposed that if there was anyone in this school who would be able to convince Remus Lupin to break all of his rules, you’d be a shoo-in.
Amelia decided then that it was actually quite an honour to have ‘lost’ to a witch like you.
Remus felt silly wandering the grounds in search of you. If he was a man of more restraint, he would try harder to control himself; but he decided there was no use in denying Moony, or himself, of you.
Thankfully for your part, you didn’t seem to mind all that much.
Remus’ life had been flipped upside down twice recently: once when he found out about his soulmate bond, and again when he came clean to you about his lycanthropy. He found he felt... freer, safer, grounded if that made any sense at all.
And though his regular anxiety surrounding the full moons seemed to lessen, his anxiety surrounding you seemed to grow each day the closer he got to the full. It was almost as if Moony was convinced he could feel every beat of your heart – it sped up momentarily, something upset you, you’re catching your breath, you’ve fallen asleep – and though Remus felt incredibly disturbed and admittedly creepy to be capable of assessing all of these things from Merlin knows how far away, it brought Moony immense comfort to be able to sense you safe.
He tried not to overwhelm you with his constant presence as Moony (and begrudgingly, himself) would much prefer, but with the full moon approaching, Remus decided it was better for everyone not to fight the urge to be close.
Remus had (quite embarrassingly) searched the entire castle for you to no avail and had even resorted to asking Regulus (who was accompanied by Barty) if he knew where you were.
Barty had scoffed at him. “Figures you wouldn’t be privy to her schedule yet, Lupin.” He sneered, emphasising his last name as if it were a dirty word.
Regulus rolled his eyes at his friend and let out a sigh. “She goes down to the Black Lake every afternoon to bring a gift to the mermaids, Lupin. Now if you don’t mind, I find Barty to be far more pleasant company when he’s not whining about people dressed in red and gold.”
Well, Remus didn’t have to be told twice. Moony was very excited to leave his present company to find ‘MINE!’.
Remus was admittedly not a huge fan of the moniker Moony had chosen for you, but he was very tired of arguing with The Wolf.
As Regulus had promised, Remus finally found you crouched down at the edge of the dock on the Black Lake, tracing shapes into the water’s surface with your hands.
Perfect. Good. Mine. Mine. Mine.
Remus couldn’t exactly disagree with the sentiment.
You were alerted to Remus’ presence by the wooden planks shifting below his feet.
“Hello Remus!” You cheered in that gentle and serene way of yours; Remus couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face.
“Hello Y/N, what are you up to?” He asked as he stood above you. You began to squint up at him and Remus quickly shifted over in order to shield your eyes from the sun.
“I’ve been trying to befriend the mermaids.” You explained, returning your gaze down to the water. “Each day I try to bring them trinkets.”
Remus hummed in acknowledgement and crouched down beside you ignoring the burning sensation in his knees. “What kind of trinkets?”
You hummed in thought before you answered. “I think anything shiny works well. Sometimes if I’ve lost the pair to an earring, I’ll bring it to them. Or crystals and gems are nice too.”
“And what do you get for your efforts?”
You turned to consider Remus bemusedly; your brows were furrowed but you were still smiling, nonetheless. “Do you only ever do things for the sake of a potential outcome, Remus?”
Remus figured he ought to feel properly chastised, but he was just too happy to be talking to you in order to do much about it. “I guess so.”
You hummed and assessed his face before turning back to the water. “Do you often feel disappointed?”
“I feel like we’ve already determined that my planning skills are not conducive to success, no?”
You smiled to yourself at that as you continued playing with the water. “It’s true that I’ve set out with a goal to befriend the mermaids. But whether or not they return that friendship, I will have succeeded.”
“Wouldn’t you think that you’d have better luck from in the water?” He queried, causing your lips to purse as you let out a disappointed sound.
“Perhaps; if I knew how to swim, I’d certainly try.”
Moony reared his big old head again at that, and Remus quickly stood and gently helped you stand and pulled you closer to the middle of the dock, away from the edge you’d been inhabiting.
You giggled at him; the first real spontaneous emotion he thinks he had ever heard from you, and it caused Remus’ heart rate to speed up double time.
“You needn’t worry, Remus.” You expressed solemnly. “I’m very careful.”
And for that, he and Moony were glad.
“Where are you headed now?” He asked instead, hoping to begin steering you away from the Lakes edge and towards solid ground.
He could tell by the subtle lift at the corners of your lips that you had caught onto him, but were gracious enough not to call him on it.
“I believe I’m to meet Bartemus and Regulus in the Slytherin dungeons for a bit.” You admitted, causing Remus to wrinkle his nose and Moony to growl in protest.
So many of the words you had used in that sentence were displeasing to Remus, but you were willingly stepping off the dock and walking towards the castle with him, so he didn’t feel he had any right to complain.
“What are you headed to now?” You asked in turn, catching Remus off guard.
What was he going to do now? The only thing he’d planned on doing was finding you, and he’d done that.
“You know; I’m not sure.” He admitted.
You chuckled at him and began telling him about Barty and Regulus’ plans for the afternoon; and although he was displeased at the content, he was very pleased listening to the sound of your voice.
He hadn’t realised he’d been subconsciously leaning into you or brushing your hand with his until you confidently yet gently took his hand in yours and continued to lament about Barty’s poor study habits without missing a beat.
Remus found himself feeling very lucky to have you as his soulmate.
Remus’ feeling of luck ran out quickly when he found himself stepping down the last stair into the Slytherin dungeon to figuratively hand you off to your friends.
You must have noticed Remus’ hesitation to let you go when you gave his hand a gentle squeeze and smiled kindly at him. “Perhaps we can meet in the library after supper? I have a Care of Magical Creatures essay to edit.”
And Remus was certain that was a lie; he was quite sure you were long done that essay, but he wasn’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth.
“That’d be very nice.” He agreed.
“Alright, alright, Lupin. Move along, would you?” Barty grumbled as he made his way over; Regulus rolled his eyes at his friend and actually offered Remus a somewhat apologetic expression.
“Barty.” You chided lightly with a smile. “Be nice, yeah?”
Barty grumbled petulantly, muttering “that was me being nice.” But he acquiesced to your request in the form of keeping his mouth shut until Remus had ascended the stairs.
True to your word, you approached the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall when you were finished eating with a kind smile on your face.
Unfortunately for poor Moony (Remus), your presence led to questions from James, who, upon hearing you were working on edits for the essay in Care of Magical Creatures, insisted he join (seeing as he hadn’t even started it yet). Of course, not one to ever be left out, Sirius was quick to offer to join.
And since Remus, James, and Sirius were all going to be in the library, Peter figured he may as well tag along.
Though Remus was feeling rather petulant about the final attendance of your study date, Moony was feeling very chuffed about his whole pack being together.
He forced Moony to lie down and be quiet as he listened to you try to help James with his essay (read: pretty much write it for him).
Remus was surprised how well you seemed to settle into his group of friends, and in turn, how his friends seemed to settle around you.
James seemed to be able to sit still for a longer period of time if it was you he was conversing with, Sirius seemed less inclined to argue with everyone about everything, and Peter seemed far more comfortable in asking you follow up questions than he was with anyone else the group had spoken with before.
Unfortunately, things didn’t seem to want to go smoothly for Remus today.
The sound of your name being called over and over and over again in a hushed tone interrupted your sentence on why the mating cycle of frost snails was dependent on the growth pattern of shrivelfig fruit as Barty came rushing over.
“I’m sorry,” he started breathlessly, surprising the absolute fuck out of Remus. “I forgot to tell you earlier; I got a letter.”
Remus watched as your face turned grave; your expression far more severe than he’d ever seen it before.
“Did you burn it?” You asked darkly.
“Not yet.” Barty admitted.
“Bartemus.” You chided quietly, looking like your heart was breaking a little bit.
“Merlin; do you really need Y/N to check your mail for you, Junior? Couldn’t this wait until later?” Sirius grumbled, never looking up from his own Runes translations he was currently working on.
Remus was surprised he didn’t hear your neck snap with the speed at which you turned your attention away from Barty and back to the table where you glared severely at Sirius.
“Sorry Treasure.” Barty commented quietly, patting your shoulder. “I’ll catch up with you later.” Before he left the library.
Remus felt his heart drop…no…he felt your heart drop as you turned to watch Barty disappear behind the stacks in the library.
“Sirius Black.” You began quietly, causing all the boys to cringe at the use of his full name. “Tell me; how do you usually feel after receiving a letter from your father?”
You had once again returned your attention back to the black-haired boy, but any of the softness and serenity that the boys were used to seeing when it came to you was nowhere to be found.
Sirius didn’t seem to have an answer for you as his eyes darted nervously between his friends.
“Is your father kind? Loving? Understanding? Does he tell you he’s proud of you? That he’s glad to have you as his son? That it’s an honour to share his name with you?”
“No.” Sirius finally said quietly.
“And who helps you with that?” You asked. “When you had nowhere to go, and no one to turn to; who helped you with that?”
Remus heard Sirius swallow around what was likely a growing lump in his throat. “James.”
“Then call me James, Sirius.” You said emphatically, standing and beginning to pack your things.
“Wait, dove. Where are you going?” Remus started reaching out a tentative hand to rest on your wrist.
You slowed your movements but didn’t stop. “I have a Sirius to comfort, and a fire ritual to perform.” You explained simply. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
And with that, you turned and disappeared into the rows of books.
“Way to go, Pads.” James grumbled as he began organising his half-written parchment. “You managed to upset a perpetually happy person, and now I’ll never finish this essay.”
“Well how am I supposed to know everything about that crazy bastard?” Sirius finally blurted out defensively.
“Don’t you think you’ve done enough damage, brother?” The voice of Regulus Black drawled as he stepped out from behind the stacks.
“Make it a habit of spying, brother?” Sirius sneered back. “Tell me; was it my conversations you were concerned with, or Juniors?”
Remus watched as Regulus’ jaw tightened minutely as he seemed to consider his next words.
“I’m not telling you this for your own sake, nor for Barty’s. But, if Y/N is important to any of you, there are some things you ought to know.” He started.
Yes. Important. Mine. Important. Moony chanted, sitting at attention.
“You know the fire that was caused by a magical experiment that went wrong a few years ago in Ottery St. Catchpole? That was Y/N’s house. Both her parents died in that fire.”
James’ head reared back as Sirius sucked in an uncomfortable breath.
“She lives there with an elderly house elf as her only family. The house elf and Barty.”
“Junior lives with Y/N?” Remus asked quickly; too quickly. He was immediately embarrassed.
“Junior lives with Y/N.” Regulus parrotted. “You know, Sirius, the Black’s aren’t the only family who practice Unforgiveables on their children.”
Regulus seemed to allow that to sit in the air for a moment before he continued.
“And you aren’t the only one who needed a friend to run to.”
“I’m sorry, alright?” Sirius admitted, though he couldn’t bring himself to make eye contact with his brother.
“I don’t think you are, Sirius. I think you’re feeling properly chastised, and have no qualms painting Barty as the villain in every story all because of the school colours he happens to wear. You were so upset when our family accused you of being sorted into the wrong house, but you are the one who continues to view houses as wrong.”
Sirius looked up at his brother at that. “I am sorry, Reg. I didn’t know.” He admitted earnestly.
“I’d thought that maybe…maybe out of everyone, you’d understand him the best… he reminds me a lot of you, you know. Stop - don’t look at me like that.”
“Reggie, I am trying, but you’re pushing your luck here.” Sirius groaned.
“I just wanted to let you know.” Regulus continued, though he seemed to be saying that to Remus. “Y/N is wonderful. And accepting, and understanding, and wholesome, and open minded. But she will protect her own. If Evans has to learn to put up with the lot of you for the sake of Potter, you’re going to have to figure out how to put up with me and Barty, because I can assure you that Barty isn’t going anywhere.”
Hearing Regulus’ message for what it truly was, Remus made a mental note:
Do not come between you and Barty.
You found the weather to be quite refreshing today as you made your way to the edge of the Black Lake.
You felt poorly for Bartemus; you didn’t understand what the point of Crouch Senior continuing to write to his estranged son was, or what he sought to accomplish.
Perhaps it was just to upset Barty, which upset you even more.
But, you’d performed the “fire sacrifice” as Barty often called it, and burned some white sage to cleanse the energy after disposing of the horrid letter.
And today was a new day.
There were hardly any clouds in the sky, the grounds were quiet as most students were still in class whilst you had a free period, and Barty had offered you a family heirloom to offer the mermaids today.
You had no sooner lost sight of the Crouch signet ring as it sank to the depths of the Black Lake when the sun in the sky was blocked from behind you.
You turned to see the figures of Silas, Shirley, and Coraline from Hufflepuff standing over you.
“I know you said she had a brian the size of a goldfish, Coraline, but it seems she rather wants to be a goldfish.” Shirley commented with a malicious smile.
“Returning home to the Grindylow’s, L/N?” Silas jeered.
Your mother always told you to ignore the mean words; to smile and stay kind when people got mean.
“What?” Coraline cooed in faux sympathy. “Kneazle got your tongue?”
“You better start talking, witch, because the way I see it; you’ve hurt one of ours.” Silas barked.
“Hurt?” You asked as you stood up, trying to sift through memories of your recent interactions with Hufflepuffs only to come up empty.
“Don’t play dumb; you totally stole Lupin right out from under Amelia.” Coraline explained.
Your heart fell; you certainly hadn’t meant to do that, you hadn’t even realised they were together. You never meant to hurt Amelia, and you were sure Remus must just hate you for this if it was true.
“Amelia is twice the witch you are; Lupin deserves better than some ditzy airhead.” Shirley spat at you.
Amelia certainly was a nice witch; she was competent, powerful, and quite pretty. She was normal too, not like you; you were odd, a freak.
“Why do you think he was spending all that time with Amelia when you two first started talking? He didn’t want you, L/N.” Coraline stressed.
He didn’t want you.
That was perhaps true. He didn’t choose this soulmate bond; and he didn’t choose you.
He had seemed more than disturbed in the beginning.
Perhaps he was only being nice to you now because he was simply no longer resisting the bond.
No one should have to live like that; to live their life out of force and obligation. Not Sirius, not Regulus, not Barty, and certainly not Remus.
“I don’t think you heard me.” Silas said as he took a menacing step towards you, and he punctuated every word with a sharp jab of his finger into your shoulder. “Stay. Away. From Lupin.”
And then he used his whole body to shove you backwards, and you were plummeting into the cold dark water of the Black Lake.
taglist: @hanniejji , @y0urm0m12 , @c0nsc10usworld , @aphrcdites , @starsval , @thepunisherfrankcastle , @anuncalledbridge, @unstablereader , @klazina-couch-potato , @cancelledkaley , @ttulipwritezz , @boo8008 , @imobsessedwitholiviarodrigo , @frostooo , @myriadmoons , @aremuslupinsimp , @simars3 , @stargurl99 , @dreamingofts18 , @iwannabeinthesequalmrghostface , @agent-tempest , @xxrougefangxx , @serenadingtigers , @adhxmoony , @hufflepufffangirlqueen , @thebiggestnaturaldisaster , @urmomw4ntsme , @b4tm4nn , @jamieolivia27 , @stqrgirlies-blog , @loving-and-dreaming
INFINITELY YOU
part two // crullers & constants
SUMMARY - In every universe, Peter Parker seems destined to fall in love with you. And, in every universe, he realizes it too late. When universes collide and two of them are granted a second chance at rectifying their biggest mistake, neither of them are willing to let the opportunity go to waste–even if you end up not being the person they thought you were.
WARNINGS - 18+, story will contain mentions of blood, broken bones, weapons, suggestive language, and more. I will try to update warnings accordingly for each chapter, but please read at your own discretion
WORD COUNT - 4.2k
// masterlist // series masterlist // send me your thoughts // no way home fan fiction // rewrite
name key: tom!peter = peter // andrew!peter = parker
Peter Pan Donuts is a sacred place.
Or, rather, it was a sacred place—and walking back into the shop now felt awfully strange.
Back when you and Peter first started high school, it had become a tradition to end every Friday with one of the renowned pastry shop’s legendary frosted crullers. You considered it a well-deserved reward for surviving another week of more drama than either of you could stomach, thankful that the weekend was finally upon you and that you could finally breathe without inhaling the reek of the unwashed teenage boys that lined the halls of Midtown.
Peter Pan’s quickly became a haven. A safe place where the two of you could tuck yourselves away at the end of the bar, talking for hours about the teachers you hated and the bullies you hoped would fall from the face of the Earth. There was nothing that you couldn’t talk about, no secrets kept between you and Peter.
Or, at least, none that mattered.
But things changed as time passed, as they so often do.
It started with the inclusion of Ned. You didn’t particularly mind his presence, even if the conversations had begun to shift towards less intimate topics, focusing instead on movies that you all wanted to see or upcoming video games that you would all try to play.
Then came the inclusion of Mj a few months later, after she landed a job at the shop. That was when everything truly changed—when it was no longer you and Peter tucked away at the bar, but you and Ned, left to pick at your food and watch as Peter leaned across the front counter and talked to Mj over her shift.
After a few months of testing every donut on the menu with Ned, you stopped going altogether.
And Peter never even asked why.
“I was surprised to see you texted me,” you quip as you slid onto the free barstool, “what happened to not wanting me to get involved?”
Peter exhales sharply through his nose, and even though his eyes are glued to his phone, you can tell that he was already regretting asking you to meet him here. “I already told you that what I want doesn’t matter.”
And how true that must have been.
There had been nothing kind about his text to you this morning, although there was nothing inherently rude about it either, you supposed. It was simple—meet me at Peter Pan’s asap, need 2 talk—but you could almost sense the begrudging nature with which he had typed it. And, sitting next to him now, you could almost feel it, too.
He didn’t want you here, even if he had been the one to invite you, and you couldn’t help but wonder why he had decided to involve you at all—especially so soon. What had changed in a single night?
Sitting on the barstool to your left, Parker pops his lips. “Well this is fun. I’m not at all uncomfortable right now.”
You turned towards him, acknowledging just how different he looked in the civilian clothes that he donned in place of his suit—black jeans that certainly looked worse for wear and an old Ramone’s t-shirt that you immediately recognized as yours. Oversized on you, the short sleeves clung rather tightly to his well-muscled arms. Did he seriously go through your stuff?!
“Why are you even here?” You ask, perhaps a little sharper than necessary. You weren’t angry that he had gone sifting through the armoire in the spare bedroom, especially since he couldn’t just parade around as Spider-Man all of the time. But he could’ve at least asked. “Shouldn’t one of you be busy patrolling?”
It was hard to tell if the offense on his face was real or feigned, but you didn’t care much either way. “Peter wanted answers about my world, I wanted food,” he shrugs, gesturing at the crème-filled donut in front of him. “And Peter 2’s handling patrol.”
Peter 2—you had almost forgotten about him, the version of Peter that hadn’t wanted to come with Ned and Mj to your apartment last night. As far as you could tell when you woke up this morning, he hadn’t shown up in the middle of the night, either—no trace of Parker or anyone else when you had finally stumbled out of your room to get ready after reading the text from Peter.
You didn’t figure it was really your business where the mystery Peter was, but you were a little surprised to hear that he was still out patrolling. Was he not exhausted?
“Ametaur move getting crème-filled,” you tell him, ignoring everything he said. “Should’ve gone with the frosted vanilla cruller, it’s way better.”
“No way,” he gapes, grabbing the half-eaten pastry and shaking it for emphasis as he said, “this is god-tier, alright? No way anything’s topping it.”
The expression on his face was actually hilarious, his brown doe eyes alight with pure euphoria as he took another bite of the donut. An exaggerated moan slipped his lips, coated with bits of sugar and crème. It was hard not to laugh at him, especially when you knew that was probably his goal—to combat the evident tension between you and Peter.
Chuckling, you lift your hands in mock defense. “Suit yourself, Parker. But if you ever wanna experience true pleasure, then you know what to order.”
Parker looks as if he's about to continue his borderline-lustful tangent about the donut, but Peter spoke up instead, his attention snagging on the name you used.
“Parker?” He echoes in disbelief, letting his phone clatter against the bar.
Peter’s sudden resurgence to the real world left Parker silent, sinking back against his stool and taking another bite.
“What?” Your brow arches, your voice laced with incredulity. “Did you really think I’d keep calling him Peter 2? No offense to Ned, but everything about that feels stupid.”
Peter’s eyes narrow, coupled with a subtle shake of his head that indicates he doesn't care nearly enough to have this conversation right now.
You didn’t care much either, and so you steered the conversation in a more productive direction. “So what is this grand plan of yours?” You ask with a somewhat sarcastic lilt. “And where do I fit into it?”
Another huff of breath escaped his nostrils. “We don’t even have a plan. Not yet,” he reluctantly admits. “But I tried talking to Doctor Strange last night, to see if he had some sort of magical spell or something that would let us go back and fix all of this.”
Your lips press together, nibbling on the skin and pretending you didn’t notice the hidden meaning behind his words. He hadn’t just gone to Doctor Strange to find a way to get rid of the villains now lurking in your world, because if he had, then he wouldn’t have gone specifically seeking out a spell that would let him go back—not just to stop the villains from ever coming here, but to save May, too.
“Did he?”
Peter reached for his cup of iced coffee, if only to occupy his now-fidgeting fingers. “No,” he murmurs, the sound of sloshing ice nearly overpowering him as he swirled the cup. “He didn’t.”
You frown at the tinge of disappointment that snuck through his otherwise even tone, your chest aching. You had to fight against the urge to say I’m sorry, remembering what he had said to you last night—he didn’t want your apologies, nor did he seem to want anyone else's.
In truth, you weren’t sure what Peter wanted; or what you could do to help him.
“Well did he have anything useful?”
He shook his head, lifting the cup to his mouth. “Define useful,” he scoffed, sounding uncharacteristically sharp. He took a sip of his drink, his nose scrunching as soon as the coffee hit his tongue—too bitter.
Despite the coffee’s pale color that indicated it was more cream than coffee, you weren’t surprised that it was still too strong for him. Peter had never truly developed a taste for coffee, only pursuing a caffeine addiction for the sake of combating the exhaustion that came with being Spider-Man. That didn’t mean he had ever grown to like it though, masking the taste with copious amounts of sugar and syrups.
“Something that will keep multiversal villains from tearing our world apart?” You venture half-heartedly, guided by pure instinct and muscle memory as you reached over to take his cup from him, snagging a few packs of sugar from the plastic canister on the bar to0.
“He has a theory,” Peter gives you a tight-lipped smile, born of pure frustration.
“A theory? And he expects us to save the world with this theory?” You ask, a bit more derisive than you would have been if Doctor Strange were around to hear.
Peter scoots closer to you, his voice purposefully low. “Do you remember when I told you about him using the Time Stone before Mr. Stark died? To look through all the different outcomes with Thanos?”
Ripping open the sugar packets and dumping them in his cup, you managed to mask a wince at the mention of Peter’s dead mentor. You only nodded, not trusting your voice to stay steady if you tried for any sort of verbal affirmation.
“Well… when he did that, he thinks that he might have actually seen through the multiverse—he just didn’t know for sure at the time.”
Your forehead creased as you popped the lid back onto his cup, sliding it back towards him. Given his advantage of Spidey-sense, he easily caught it before it could slide too far and end up on the floor—which is what would have definitely happened pre-Spider bite.
“And you don’t consider that to be useful to our current situation?”
“No. I don’t.” Peter answers firmly. “Because at the center of it all—in every universe the Stone showed him—all he saw was you.”
You nearly laugh, your lips curving as you rose a brow at him. “Me?”
Peter gave a nod as he took another sip of his drink. This time, his nose didn’t scrunch.
“But it’s been almost a year since the Avengers took down Thanos,” you reminded him, your stunned amusement beginning to fade into confusion. “If he saw.. Me, when he used the Stone, then why didn’t he say anything until now?”
By no means would you consider yourself to be close with New York’s resident Sorcerer, and so you wouldn’t have expected him to come to you with this knowledge. But Peter—he knew Peter, and he knew that you were Peter’s best friend, and so it didn’t make any sense to you why Doctor Strange chose to wait until now to mention what the Stone had shown him.
Given the aggravated expression Peter wore, it was clear that he was thinking the same. “I don’t know, and trying to get answers out of Doctor Strange that he clearly doesn’t want to give is like pulling teeth.”
“But what does that mean?” You couldn’t stop yourself from pressing further, concern starting to bubble up inside of you. Regardless of his answer—if he had one—you had a feeling you wouldn’t like it. “I don’t get how I’m at the center of every universe.”
Peter blew out a breath, his fingers going back to tapping against the sides of his plastic cup. “Alright, so there are probably well-over a hundred thousand different parallel universes, okay? Some of them are probably super similar to ours, and then there are others that are the complete opposite.”
“O-kay,” you drone, your brows drawing together. You felt the start of a headache coming on as you prepared yourself for the confusing science-talk that was surely about to start pouring out of his mouth.
Perhaps noticing your pained expression, Peter tries to find a way to simplify whatever explanation he was about to use. “Try and look at it like this,” he started, “think of the multiverse as some giant, cosmic loom, alright? Now imagine that each thread on the loom signifies a person. As the loom weaves all of these different threads together, different decisions get made and different actions are taken—and with every choice, a new thread is spun, branching off and creating a variation of the original tapestry.”
“So it’s like you and Parker, right?” You interrupt him, rubbing at your temples. “Same thread, different reality?”
“Exactly! And, technically speaking, that’s how it’s supposed to be. As the loom weaves and alters reality, each thread continuously evolves into something different.” He paused, his fingers finally falling still. “But now imagine that—in the center of all of these branching tapestries—there exists one thread, entirely unbroken and unaltered by this ever-weaving tapestry of existence, okay? A glitch in the cosmic fabric, a constant that’s woven into infinite realities and yet, somehow, remains fundamentally unchanged. How does that work?”
You couldn’t ignore the sense of dread creeping up your spine, nor could you escape the slight wobble in your voice as you said, “It doesn’t sound like it should.”
“You’re right, it shouldn’t work.” Peter confirmed, his expression nearly impossible to read. “But according to Doctor Strange, you are that thread. A constant anomaly that defies every potential law of the multiverse.”
Nausea bubbled in your gut. God, you did not want to deal with this right now!
“And let me guess,” a bitter laugh follows your words, “that’s as much information as he was willing to give, wasn’t it?”
“Yep,” Peter pops his lips, leaning back into his stool. His brows raise slightly in a silent I told you so before he says, “Hey, you’re the one that wanted to be involved, right? Now you’re at the center of everything-”
“I said I wanted to help you,” you correct him sharply. “Not that I wanted to be at the center of Doctor Strange’s weird Time Stones fantasies!”
He only shrugs, barely acknowledging the dirty look you gave him as he plucks his phone off of the counter, clicking on a notification. “Same thing, isn’t it? Either way, you get what you want.”
“What I want?” You echoed, your mouth hung open in disbelief.
“Doctor Strange seems to think that whatever is wrong with you might help us solve all of this. That you might be connected to the multiverse somehow, or that you’re at least immune to it. So yeah, you get what you want. You get to help,” he spat the word out like an insult, too focused on typing something to even notice how rude he sounded.
If it weren’t for the feeling that stomach acid was about to come crawling up your throat, then you might have taken some time to unpack the bitterness in his tone or be hurt by the claim that something was wrong with you—but you didn’t. Even if you had, you weren’t sure that it would have gotten you anywhere.
You weren’t stupid. Peter was wielding his insolence like a shield, purposefully trying to hurt you as an effort to keep you at arms length—and, if you had to guess, Mj and Ned were probably receiving the same treatment right now.
“Well this isn’t exactly what I had in mind when I said I wanted to help,” you admitted, one hand going to rest against your cramping stomach. At least the throbbing in your temples had died down…
Peter only shrugged at you, shoving his phone in his back pocket and rising to his feet. “Too bad,” he told you, offering a smile that most definitely wasn’t genuine. “I’ve gotta go, but make him walk you home, alright? I’ll text you if I hear anything else from Doctor Strange.”
Parker frowned beside you, and whether it was because Peter was speaking about him like he wasn’t here or because of his attitude in general, you couldn’t tell.
“Whoa, hold up! You didn’t even tell me what your plan is until you hear from him!” You argue, reaching for his wrist to keep him from walking past you until he answered.
He pulls his hand back from your grip, but not before your stare snags on the reddish hue that stains his nails—blood. Noticing it only served to make you feel sicker, and to make your concern for Peter grow larger. Was he really still walking around with May’s blood caked under his nails? Has he rested at all since last night?
“Same plan as always,” he told you, your eyes snapping up to meet his, suddenly noticing how rimmed with exhaustion they were. “Stop the bad guys.”
He didn’t leave any time for protests or further questions before turning his back to you and heading straight for the exit. When the little bell on the door chimed as he shoved his way back out onto the streets, you couldn’t stop the worried sigh that escaped your lips.
Peter was an Avenger by every right. He had battled alongside a Norse God and helped take down a literal Titan, and so knew that you shouldn’t have any reason to doubt his capability when it came to taking down whatever villains had crossed into your world.
But it wasn’t that you doubted his ability to survive against them, or even his ability to stop them—you were worried about whether he could handle the weight of it all.
The weight of him placing yet another thing on his shoulders. Another villain, another fight, another burden, another chance to lose someone.
Thinking of that, it suddenly dawned on you that maybe Mj and Ned weren’t getting the same treatment as you. Maybe you were getting the worst of it, if only because now whatever connection you had to the multiverse was just another weight he thought he had to bear, another person he had to worry about protecting.
Guilt flooded your veins, and even as you tried to remind yourself that you hadn’t caused this, you still couldn’t shake the anxious feeling that it was somehow your fault anyway.
“Y’know, I get that this probably isn’t the right time for this,” Parker starts. When you look at him, your attention immediately snags on the dozen donuts that he had ordered while you were talking to Peter. “But I think it’s so cool that you guys have magic in your world!”
He takes another bite of the donut in his hand, powdered sugar falling from his lips as he says, “And these donuts! It’s a tough call, but they might be even better than magic!”
You didn’t know him well enough to be able to tell if he was intentionally trying to lighten the mood or if it was just incidental, but it worked all the same. Laughter poured from your mouth, and it wasn’t until it died down that he said anything else.
“Sooo… That was tense, wasn’t it? Like, it wasn’t just me, right?”
You groan, propping your elbows against the counter and placing your cheeks in your palms. “Was it that noticeable?”
Parker snorts a laugh, stretching an arm past you to reach for Peter’s abandoned coffee. “Oh, yeah. It’s actually painful to be in a room with you two.”
His playful tone made it clear that it was just a joke, but it still made you feel bad. You already didn’t like how hostile things felt between you and Peter, even if it was only one-sided, and to know that others felt it too just made it that much worse.
“Things are just.. Difficult, right now.” You tell him, choosing your words carefully.
“So it hasn’t always been like that with you guys?” He asks, and the delicate arch of his brow made it seem as though he were shocked by the possibility that things had ever been civil between you and Peter.
There was a chance that you had misread his expression though, as it was very quickly wiped away once he took a sip of Peter’s half-drank coffee, gagging as soon as it hit his tongue. “Holy shi-” he started coughing, cutting off the vulgarities that threatened to spill out. “How does he drink this?!” Parker yelped as soon as he could take a full breath, looking utterly disgusted as he shoved the cup back across the bar. “It’s literally just liquid sugar!”
You found it hard to stifle your amusement at his suffering, even as he shot you a teasing scowl for it. “No,” you answer his previous question, trying to ignore his melodramatic display, “believe it or not, things between us actually used to be really… I don’t know—easy, I guess.”
Parker was still smacking his lips to try and rid himself of the cloying aftertaste. “What changed?”
In retrospect, you realized that it probably would have been smarter for you to bite your tongue. To offer him some cheap, cop-out excuse rather than tell him the truth. After all, you already had experience in hiding from the truth and it wasn’t like you really knew Parker, and so lying to him shouldn’t have been a hard task.
Yet, for some reason, you told him the truth anyway.
“Mj happened.”
Parker’s brows furrows. “The girl from last night, right?”
“Yep. That’s the one.”
“Y’know, I don’t really like her all that much,” his words were spoken like a balm, seeking to ease the dejected look etched upon your face, but tinged with enough playful sarcasm for you to know he didn’t actually mean them. “She threw a bread roll at me. A few of them, actually.”
It was hard not to laugh at the thought considering that it was such an Mj thing to do. “Sounds about right,” you crack a smile, although you don't feel particularly happy. “She’s always been slow to trust, especially complete strangers.”
In an odd sort of way, the statement felt like a lie. Not because it actually wasn’t true—because Mj was wary of strangers—but because Parker didn’t quite feel like a stranger in your mind. While last night had been a bit awkward, you now felt like talking to him was effortless, each sentence rolling off your tongue with unnatural ease.
“But she trusts you?” Parker asks, picking a crumb off another one of the pastries and popping it into his mouth.
You sucked in a breath.
“I don’t know,” you answer him, with a bit more honesty than you're comfortable with. “I mean, I know that she used to trust me. But now… I’m not even sure if she likes me anymore.”
His brow snapped up. “What changed?”
Suddenly the truth no longer felt so easy, and you found yourself wishing that you could change the subject altogether. You didn’t want to talk about this—especially not with him, some boy that you had known for less than twenty-four hours.
But you had backed yourself into a corner, and so in an effort to try and satiate whatever interest he had developed in the story you had told, you settled on offering a vague half-truth.
“She started dating Peter,” you tell him simply, putting effort into looking disinterested. “They got together a few months ago and things just… It just got weird, y’know? It’s always awkward when two of your friends get together, I guess. Creates too much drama.”
“Yeah, for sure,” Parker hums, agreeing with you. “Especially when you have feelings for him, right?”
An incomprehensible noise escaped your throat, best categorized as something between a laugh and a cough. Your mouth fell open to try and defend yourself, to try and deny his claim—but he didn’t even give you a chance.
“Oh c’mon!” Parker groans, grinning when he notices the now rosy complexion of your cheeks. “Did you really think I wouldn’t notice? I mean, let’s be real here, alright? That whole sugar thing earlier?” He jutted a finger towards Peter’s abandoned iced coffee, “Was a dead giveaway.”
“You’re insane,” You declare, shaking your head and masking your embarrassment with uncomfortable laughter. “I don’t have feelings for Peter—and even if I did, it wouldn’t matter! Regardless of what it’s done to our friendship, Mj is literally perfect for him and-”
“I think it’s cute,” he interrupts, a delicate smile gracing his lips. Noticing the way your brows furrow, he elaborated, “How much you care about him. And how much you care about her, too, since you’re so willing to pretend like you don’t like him.”
“I’m not pretending-”
Parker jokingly cut his eyes. “Yeah, sureee.”
Blowing a frustrated breath, you push yourself up from the barstool. “Alright, I think it’s time to go home.” You tell him, far too flustered to try and come up with a good defense to his teasing. “You can take the rest of your donuts to go, Bug-boy.”
There was a subtle shift in his demeanor as the taunting nickname fell from your lips, and he almost felt as though his heart had stopped dead in his chest.
“Fine,” Parker yields, rising to his feet and snagging the box of donuts from the bar. “But I really hope that you have your wallet—cause I definitely don’t have a way to pay for these.” He flashed a crooked smile before continuing, “Or we can just run really fast and hope they don’t call the police on us for stealing pastries.”
“I can’t imagine that robbery would be very good for your reputation as a hero,” you chide sarcastically, your own lips curling into a half-smile, “so I’ll pay—but only if you give me every cruller in that box. Deal?”
Parker spares a quick glance down at the dozen box of donuts in his hands. Half of them were already gone, but through the small cellophane window he could see that there were three frosted crullers left. “Deal.”
series masterlist
a/n - for those who read IY before the rewrite, you may already be able to note some rather major changes going on lmao. i genuinely can't describe how much i actually enjoy rewriting this story, as i'm finally able to collect my thoughts enough to write the plot the way i originally wanted to.
as always, please leave any feedback, opinions, etc.! any and all comments/reblogs definitely encourage me to write/edit faster! and, if you'd like to be added to the tag list, just let me know!
part three, titled "spitfire", to be released april 15th
"it was in 2020" oh so like a year or so ago. a couple years. im sorry 5? did you just say five? five years ago ?
you foster a hot and cold relationship with your desk buddy, James, until things start to change, and you both fail to ignore your new feelings. fem, sfw you and James have to share a bed you slip outside of the office you offer the very first olive branch James defends you from a coworker James assures you that you’re pretty James pretends you aren’t cute at karaoke you faint at the office you realise James isn’t fully insufferable you fall asleep on James’ shoulder James forgets why he doesn’t like you you buy James a new smiski for his desk you come onto your period unexpectedly James accidentally calls you lovely you and James get stuck in a lift James hates when people flirt with you James jumpstarts your car, you ogle James is upset when others treat you badly you call James ‘Jamie’ for the first time James antagonises you into a kiss you and James hide your feelings James takes you out for coffee
santa doesn’t know you like i do
james potter x f!reader (smut)
summary: you and james had been distant for a month, until you saw him at a christmas reunion. you thought he didn’t see you the way you wanted him, until he couldn’t help but bringing you over to his apartment next door.
a/n: did this in a rush but i needed to do a christmas james fic, also stream fruitcake (i love you sabrina carpenter) happy holidays!! didn’t really check for mistakes so just tell me if you see any (please), also keep in mind english isn’t my first language so sorry about any errors.
warnings: smut with plot, muggle + modern day au, afab!reader, she/her pronouns referring to reader, reader knows how to bake, james is taller than reader, wolfstar, friends to lovers, petnames (love, darling, sugar), casual drinking, use of y/n once, kissing, hickeys, swearing, praise, fingering, oral (f receiving), slight dom!james and sub!reader dynamic, james loves biting, orgasm denial?, a bit of a size kink, unprotected (sorry) penetration
you loved the winter time, especially christmas.
gifts, snow, hot chocolate, good food, what could be top that?
you and your friends had planned a christmas reunion, you were so excited you felt stupid. sirius and remus were hosting the party in their apartment, which was right next to james’, so you assumed he’d be there.
even though you and james were very close friends, since you had developed a crush on him you both had been a bit distant, especially because he was in a situationship with a girl you barely knew and you didn’t want to get in the way. even if you were attracted to him, you wanted what has best for him, though you couldn’t handle being around him while he was obsessing over her.
you told your roommate, lily, about it and she said that you were acting silly, distancing yourself from him like that and that you should try and talk to him normally at the party. you guessed she was right, you just wondered if he was going to bring the girl there, you would absolutely hate it.
you and lily went separately, which you realized was a bad idea once you stood in an elevator with a very heavy glass tray filled with chocolate mousse not being able to press the floor buttons without dropping the dessert on the floor or getting your dress dirty. and so you heard him.
shit.
“remus, are you sure she’s not coming?” you heard james say from far away. “no, i just don’t want to-” he saw you. “listen, i’m getting on the elevator, see you soon” he stepped in, cheeks flushed looking at you. you knew he was talking about you in that phone call.
“hi, it been a while” he says, trying to look away from you.
“james, could you press the button please?” you request, signaling to the buttons on the elevator with your head.
“oh, yeah, of course. going to the party?” he asked, already knowing the answer. you nod a yes, hating how awkward the situation felt. the elevator doors close and you feel obliged to say something
“how’s anna?” you question, remembering the girl he had been with for the past month.
“alright, i think” he looks at you. “it didn’t work out between us, you know? we broke up one or two weeks ago”
“sorry to hear that” you weren’t sorry at all.
“it’s whatever, i’m not even sure if i really liked her, just felt like i was trying to get over someone” he stated, the doors open and he held up his arm, holding the door so you could get out before him.
“that sucks. thank you” you step out, staring at him as he got out. he looked pretty like this, his hair looked messy-cute, just the way you liked it. he was wearing the black pants you bought him once and a sweater. he was probably freezing outside. sure, you weren’t wearing the best clothes to keep you warm, specially with the length of the dress, but you took an uber, he walked everywhere.
“hey, could you help me out with something?” he asked, opening the door to his apartment.
“sure” you follow him, closing the door behind you with a bump of your left shoulder, gently placing the tray you were holding on his entrance table. he looks at you, blank look on his face, he looked like his mind was fully empty. “so, what is it you want help with?"
“right, hm, could you help me pick out a sweater?” before you distanced yourself from him, he would always call you randomly and ask you to pick out his clothes. you loved it, it felt like playing with dolls again. you nodded a yes and he went to his room, you looked around his living room. it looked the exact same as it did a month ago, except it had a small christmas tree in the corner between the tv and the framed mirror. you got on your knees to look at the ornaments. they all had pictures of him and his friends. once you saw a picture of you and him in one, you felt like crying, it was the cutest thing. you were smiling and his face was glued to the side of yours, pretending he was biting your cheek. you quickly took a photo and put your phone back in your cardigan's pocket.
“you like the tree?” he smiled, you turned your head and got up, straightening your dress. he had given you quite the fright.
“it’s cute” you smile back, he was shirtless, holding two options in his hands.
“did you see that photo of us from thanksgiving?”
“yeah, i did” you look away. he holds up two sweaters, a cream colored one with little blue patterns and an awfully ugly one that had christmas lights. you were sure he had worn the ugly one to last years holiday party, it was ugly sweater themed.
“i would go with the one that doesn’t have lights” you were sure he was joking when he brought that one. “also, that has to be some sort of fire risk.” you joke as he put son the cream one.
“good choice, thank you, love” he referred to you like that, you just didn’t expect he would feel okay with doing it now.
“you’re welcome, james” you smile, looking at him, but not directly into his eyes. he goes to the door and picks up the mousse effortlessly.
“i’ll get this for you, don’t worry” he said before you could question him. you follow him and open the door.
once he steps out, you close the door behind him and he looks at you that way again.
“we’re doing okay, right? we’re not fighting or anything like that?” he asked, your brows furrow, feeling bad for not treating him like you usually did this past month.
“of course we’re okay, aren’t we? i’m okay” except you weren’t okay with loving him, you weren’t okay at all, but it was better to love him and him not corresponding than not having him in your life at all.
“good, ‘cause i wouldn’t know what to do without you, darling” he said, smiling.
“i wouldn’t know what to do without you either” you smile back and ring the doorbell to the apartment next to james’. it takes him a while but remus opens the door, looking at you and james in shock.
“hey, guys” he said in an awkward tone, the one that his voice turned into when he was nervous. “come in” he said, opening the door wider and mouthing something to james as he held the door for you.
“i’ll take your dessert to the kitchen” james says to you as you head over to lily, who was talking to mary.
“okay, just put it in the refrigerator, alright?” he nods and sirius follows him as he goes to the kitchen.
“why’d you lie to me?” he interrogates remus as he opens the door of the refrigerator.
“listen, i knew you wouldn’t come if i told you she’d be here. i didn’t want you to spend christmas all alone in your apartment, plus, you guys weren’t even in a fight, you’re just distant” he explains himself nervously moving his hands.
“he saw her?” sirius questions, coming into the kitchen and seeing his boyfriend nervous.
“went up the elevator with her.” james stated and looked at remus again “she could’ve heard what i was telling you on the phone, you know?” james said almost whispering, scared you’d hear that too.
“please, everyone knows that you’re in love with her. don’t torture rem’ over it” sirius jokes, giving the man next to him a kiss on the cheek.
“listen, chill out, drink a bit. it’ll be fine” remus says, looking at james with empathetic eyes.
james was trying to not think about you. he had been trying for the past year. until he met anna a month ago, as time passed and he spent more time around anna, he realized that everything she did reminded him of you. it seemed like he had been falling for someone who was a bad copy of you and he wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he stayed with her. that month was by far the worst in his year, it was the one without you. you pulled away and he didn’t understand why, so when he saw you that night, he thought you hated him. he didn’t know what to do.
until you talked to him.
that was when he felt like everything good was happening to him, like somehow the universe had brought you back to him. and when he saw you taking a picture of his christmas tree his heart could’ve just melted. he knew you didn’t hate him and that was the biggest relief possible. so he stayed at the party.
“hi” you greeted him, sitting down next to him on the couch. everyone was doing their own thing. james would usually be around the boys joking and drinking, but that night he had spent most of his time sitting on the couch across from you, eyeing your every move. when mary, who had been talking to you for the past twenty minutes, saw him, she announced that she was going to get a drink and chat with peter for a bit. and so you were left making eye contact with james from across the room. after thirty seconds you got up and sat next to him.
“hey” he smiled, you took his drink from his hand and took a sip, not breaking eye contact once. the heat burned your throat in the best way possible, it was way stronger than what he usually had.
“changing it up for the holidays? you’re usually a beer guy, aren’t you?” you ask, putting his drink on the coffee table in front of you both.
“decided i needed something more for tonight, 'was feeling kind of tired, you know?” you nod in answer, your leg brushed against james’ and you immediately looked away from him, he casually put his right hand on your knee and led it up to where your dress ended in the middle of your thighs. you were so incredibly close it was driving you insane, what was he even doing?
“have you baked those cookies recently?" he looks at you, like he wasn’t doing nothing at all. was he drunk?
“i haven’t, but i can bake some for you another day, i know you like them. how much did you drink?” you ask, his tolerance was high, the party had been going for about an hour and a half, he didn’t drink much, did he?
“almost nothing. two cups of that you drank” his hand there was driving you crazy, you tried to hide it but your nervousness was pretty noticeable. “i really like the cookies, what do you put in them that’s different?” “hm, usually i put more salt and vanilla extract than what’s recommended by recipes but that’s it” you felt a lump in your throat, he was making you so nervous. he looked so good and you felt like screaming because he had never touched you like that before. sure, very long hugs and sometimes cuddles, but not hands on thighs and whatever it was he was doing to you.
“are you alright, love? you seem a bit pale” he questioned, smiling at you, that damned smile.
“i’m fine. i’m going to the bathroom to freshen up, but i’ll be back soon” you got up and walked quicker than usual to the guest bathroom, locking the door behind you as you walked in. you looked at yourself in the mirror, trying to calm down. no, he wasn’t flirting with you, you were just being delusional, it was all fine. plus, you both were really good friends. it was completely normal for friends to touch each other like that, you were just letting your feelings for him get in the way of some friendly physical touch. that was probably it. you checked your makeup and flushed the empty toilet, to at least fake you were actually in the bathroom.
as you opened the door, you were faced with james potter, in all his glory, staring at the door of the bathroom you were just in.
“sorry, did i take long? i-” he interrupted you.
“listen, y/n, i have been trying to brush this off for about a year now but i can’t. i hope this doesn’t affect our friendship, but im interested in you. as more than a friend and i really like you. i think you’re pretty, funny, i think you smell great and have an amazing taste on basically everything. i want to take you out on dates and treat you better than anyone ever has, this past month i have felt so bad without you around me and when i saw you again today i just felt better. well, that was until i realized about half an hour ago that i hadn’t bought you a christmas gift, but just text me your wishlist and i’ll get you whatever you want because i just want to make you happy. that’s all i want this christmas. also, is this bad timing to point out the mistletoe on the doorframe?”
you couldn’t believe it. you loved everything he had just said, you wanted him more than you’ve ever wanted anything in your life. you loved him.
“kiss me” you said simply like your heart wasn’t pounding crazy quick in your chest.
“what?” “kiss me. isn’t it bad luck not to kiss under mistletoe?” so he did. his lips crashed with yours, his right hand holding you by the back of your neck and his left on your hip, closer to your ass than it normally would be in any kiss. he spent a while like that, lips glued to yours, taking the situation in. he pulled away, looked at you from top to bottom and then went back to the kiss. his tongue entered your mouth smoothly, but the kiss was feral and hungry. he craved your taste, he kissed you like a starved man.
soon enough, the left hand was grabbing your ass for dear life. he pulled away again, leaving you craving the feeling of his mouth on yours.
“you’re not feeling well, can i take you home?” he asked, looking at your lips. it took you a while to understand what he was implying.
“please” you whisper, he takes your hand and leads you to the living room, grabbing your cardigan from the chair it was on.
“wait here” he said to you, going over to sirius and telling him you were feeling a bit sick. sirius waved to you and mouthed a get well soon, it was sweet he believed james, specially since his mouth looked pink from your tinted lipgloss.
as soon as you stepped out of the apartment you looked at james with a big smile on your face.
“this is so weird, i suddenly feel better” you joke.
“really, huh? should take you to my apartment just to be safe” he picked you up, holding you with one arm.
“james!” you shouted, laughing.
“don’t worry, darling. ‘gonna take good care of you” he opened the door to his apartment, closing it with his foot. he took you to his room, throwing you on the bed and jumping to lay down on the spot next to you. he took his shoes off lazily and took off your heels for you.
“you’re so stupid, you know that?” you comment, rolling your eyes at his gesture. you loved it.
“yeah, i am the one who’s stupid” he smiled, crawling over you, his legs between yours and his face right over yours, giving you a sweet smile. he kissed you again, that same starved way, this time he wouldn’t have to stop though.
his hands roamed your body, cupping your breasts through your dress. your hands went over to his hair, tugging on it lightly. he chuckled into your mouth when you did it the first time, but he liked it more than anything. he pulled away from your mouth, now kissing from your cheeks to your neck, biting it lightly, leaving marks. you gasped at the feeling of his teeth nipping on your skin, the wet patch on your underwear becoming absolutely undeniable.
his kisses turned sloppy once they reached your chest, he pulled down your dress to get a good look, you weren’t wearing a bra. your breasts looked absolutely perfect, your nipples perked up because of the cold.
“you look so fucking gorgeous” he whispered “hate to mess you up like this” no he didn’t. he was loving every second of it.
his lips sucked on your right nipple, his hand grabbing your left boob. you moaned at the warm feeling of his mouth on you. his tongue flicking your nipple before moving onto the other.
“james” you gasp, shivering under him. he’s loving the way you react to him. your hand goes down to palm him through his jeans, he can’t help but groan.
“needy, aren’t we?” he teases. he’s been waiting for this moment for so long, at the same time he wants to take it slow, he wants to absolutely wreck you.
“please” you beg, he wants something else first.
“not yet, princess. be patient” he slips his hand under the waistband of your underwear, feeling how wet you were. “all for me?”
“all yours” you tried not to stutter, holding back a moan once he pinched your clit.
“good girl” he says, putting one finger in you, using his thumb to stimulate your sensitive bud. you bring the back of your hand over your mouth to hold in a moan but he stops you.
“nonono, none of that. i wanna hear you, love” he puts another finger in and you moan, lightly arching your back. he smiles and trusts his fingers into you whilst stimulating your bud.
“you’re being so good, sugar. so pretty like this” he praised you, your walls clench around him and you moan loudly at his words. he smirks, already knowing how much you love being praised like that. being told you’re a good girl. he pulls out his fingers and you whine at the empty feeling. he pulls the sweater he was wearing from off of him, discarding the piece of clothing you had picked for him earlier that night. he takes your lacy underwear off and opens your legs, holding apart with his wrists and getting a perfect view of you.
he kisses the inside of your thighs upwards in the direction of your pussy, he was kissing you everywhere except where you most wanted him. until suddenly he kitten licked your hole, his thumb moved in circular motions on your clit. you groaned at the feeling of his mouth on you. he sucked on your clit and put two fingers in again, flicking over your sensitive bud with his tongue.
“fuck!” you moaned once he nipped at your clit with his teeth, you were so close. your hands tug on his hair and you can feel his cocky smile against you. he kept on thrusting his fingers into you, sucking onto your bud harder. you moaned loudly at the feeling, not being able to hold it in.
“shit, james, i’m gonna cum” you say in between moans and groans. you were almost reaching your high but he pulled his fingers out, giving your cunt a peck before pulling away, making you whine.
“not yet” he took off his pants hurriedly, he was wearing white underwear and you could see his hard cock pressed against the fabric. he was bigger than what you thought was. james took himself out of his underwear, he was on his knees towering over you, not breaking eye contact as he stroked himself before penetrating you. it was probably the hottest thing you had ever seen. he gave you a quick kiss before lining himself up against your entrance, the tip against your aching hole.
“tell me if you want to stop, alright?” he asks, looking into your eyes as you nod. you close your eyes as he begins to put it in.
“no, look at me, love” he demands, you open your eyes and look at him over you. holy shit. once he’s fully in he groans, not moving an inch. “you’re so fucking tight, feels so good” he whispers, pulling out almost fully and then trusting back in. you moaned at the exciting new feeling.
it took him a few thrusts, but once he finally picked up his pace he didn’t hold back, hitting your g-spot perfectly with every thrust. he made you a moaning and shivering mess beneath him, scratching harshly his back. you were sure it would leave marks.
his head was in the crook of your neck, biting the soft skin beneath him. it felt better than anything, it didn’t take long for you to start feel your orgasm coming onto you. he thrusted deeply, hitting the perfect spot even harder.
you moaned loudly, your walls clenched around him, he groaned at the feeling.
“are you alright?” he teased you, voice sounding strained as his thrusts hit deep inside of you. he lifts your hips, thrusting harder and hitting everywhere you needed him to. you threw your head back, completely taken by the pleasure he was causing over you, your eyes fluttering shut.
“shit, james. ‘m gonna cum” you state, scratching his back roughly.
“do it, be a good girl and cum for me” he said, groaning as your walls tightened around him. your climax hits you hard and you're moaning and arching your back as he holds you against him. his thrusts don’t stop once you’ve finished.
“gonna cum in you, is that alright?” you nod in answer, not being able to form a coherent sentence because of how fucked out you were. the sound of his hips slapping against yours filling up the room along with your moans and his swearing. after a few thrusts you felt his cock twitch inside of you, his hot juices mixing with yours.
once he’s finished he collapses over you, not pulling out. he leaves a trail of kisses from your collarbone to your mouth, kissing you firmly once he gets to the end.
“i think i should take you out on a date sometime” he says, grinning. he was so stupid.
“you really should” you kiss him softly and you knew what it was. he was also in love.