5/31/24

[𝟒.𝟏𝟎]

today I: did laundry took out the trash discussion post drunk 2 bottles of water took Instagram pictures call grandpa and tell him happy birthday

my daily allotted complaining time:

I got a 75 on my exam, I expected a higher grade. I studied, but not nearly as much as I could have, and I am conflicted on my feelings about it. Last semester I failed the class, and this semester I was determined to do better, and I am, but I still struggle with taking test. I've never been good at taking test, in high school I could skate by with good grades because tests were never worth much and even if they were I could always do retakes, but I've been "learning" how to study, and even if I don't get a A in the class anything would be an improvement since last semester.

moral of the story:

today i wanted nothing more but to rot in bed, but I knew I shouldn't, its so easy to slip into a routine of doing only what is mandatory, but I made myself get up, and getting up was just the first stop. take the day one step/ task at a time, and it was relatively slow-moving to start, and I didn't accomplish nearly as much as I wanted to, but I did certainly more than I would have if I had left myself sit in bed all day and mindlessly scroll

recently learned about the concept of a commonplace book and I am obsessed with it. a notebook where I keep all of the information I've gathered that I want to remember? when my shitty little brain can't remember what I read 5 minutes ago? perfect. yes. good.

Isn't it odd how much fatter a book gets when you've read it several times? As if something were left between the pages every time you read it. Feelings, thoughts, sounds, smells... and then, when you look at the book again many years later, you find yourself there too.. a slightly younger self, slightly different, as if the book had preserved you like a pressed flower... both strange and familiar.

- Cornelia Funke, The Inkheart

art tips

don't call what you create "content". regardless of what it is. that's the devil talking. call it art, call it writing, call it music, call it analysis, call it editing, literally just call it what it is

I was going to put other things but oh my god please just don't call yourself a "content creator". you are a person you are making art / writing / music / etc you are an artist an author a musician

you are not an Image Generator For Clicks And Views. please. allow yourself to connect with your work by naming it properly and acknowledging yourself in kind

A Secret History, otherwise known as what the fuck Richard

(the last few bullet points will be talking about CSA so if that triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, don't read this)

Hi pookies, sorry for being awol, I've been prepping for finals, as well as annotating a secret history, and I had some thoughts I felt like sharing.

first of all fuck Henry

Bunny being the one to say " to live forever" is the definition of being doomed by the narritive

there is no version of the story where bunny lives, and by him being the one who says that, is in a way a challenge to Henrey

Richard opens the book by claiming to be a good liar, and in every situation where he lies he does it horribly is the funniest thing ever

Henry was a budding serial killer, and I think that by the simple fact of giving poor Charles those pills

I also don't think Bunny was as bad as the group made him out to be. Richard is obviously a self-admitted unreliable narrator, but I really don't think Bunny was as bad as they were making him out to be

sure he was probably really annoying, but the week before his death I don't think he was being purposely antagonistic but acting afraid

and in a sense when Richard found out about the murder, that was bunny signing his death certificate.

i think Henry was always going to kill Bunny, he was just waiting for a good enough excuse

when Jullian left Henry started decompensating like a serial killer, and that's why he lost control when talking to Charles

and while it is clearly the best choice to send Fransis to the police, Henry tells Charles to go because Charles is easy to manipulate

i think Fransis is obviously disalutioned by Henry from the beginning of the book, while Charles and Richard were still drinking the Kool-aid

Camilla is obviously romantisized by Richard, and I think that in all reality he probably viewed women in a simmular way Bunny did

in Camilla's descriptions she is often barefoot, and he makes note to mention that during the act of the murder she wasn't present

he also compares most women to Marion a person he thinks is too stupid and girly

people forget how physically imposing henry is, by Richard describing him it almost infantilizes him, in a way.

he is physically imposing which made him look odd, but he lifted camila with great ease, and lifts weight despite is limp

i think he hurt camilla by pulling out her hair, and hurting her wrist

i feel bad for bunny because while he was teetering over the edge he must have been so afraid

richard and henry could have been the same under slightly different circumsances

camilla is not as oblivious to things as people belive she is, obviously she is a victim, but the narrative implies that she is for lack of a better term, not completely innocent

she is a victim of her circumstances, but not completely innocent

richard clings to the group because they are every thing he wanted to

henry killed himself to achieve some fucked up version of godhood.

fransis is the most complex character because by the end of the book we feel bad for him despite taking advantage of 2 of the other characters in the book

he is also clearly in love with Charles but yk

CSA TW BELOW

okay so i think its pretty clear that Charles is a CSA victim

he very clearly has an eating disorder, and a alcohol problem which Fransis exacerbates by getting him drunk and hooking up with him frequently

not only that but he is really dependent on his friendships and is constantly paranoid that they are talking about him, but needs constant reassurance like a child

but also when bunny is making digs at the group, he starts talking about the preversions of the catholic church, i don't think that group cared, nor do i belive that any of them are particularly religious, but I do belive that Bunny was making a dig about Charles being molested by a preist

and if that's the case than his ultimate outcome makes the most sense,

that also makes sense why he would frequently sleep with camilla and fransis

feel free to message me so we can chat about it... this book has recently become my greatest obsession, or we can chat in the comments.

SCHOOL CHEAT SHEET!!

soothe yourself | self care

stationery  

printables

helpful sites

music for studying | more music

note taking methods  | another one

studying methods

english | physics | chemistry | biology | maths | languages 

how to learn a language

ultimate guide for writing | writing resources | writing helps | tips for writers

how to write a kickass essay | write a great essay | stuff you need to write essays | essay tips | essay checklist | grade your essay

how do I study for…

bullet journals | a guide to bullet journals

the testing effect

everything you need to succeed in school

time management

organisation

how to annotate | another one

guide to aesthetically pleasing notes | improve your handwriting

create a study guide

resources | helpful websites | there’s an app for that

get more out of google 

productivity resources | 14 apps to become productive | how to stay productive

lazy night owl school survival guide

apps for a better life | useful websites for students

masterpost of studying tips

social media citation guide

college masterpost | another one | starting college on the right foot | packing for college | how to survive in college

how to ace that college interview

food to stay motivated | motivation guide

how to stay awake in class

balancing a healthy lifestyle

studying on your period

huge masterpost for the semester

a very long list to help you survive school

not enough time to finish an assignment?

100 delicious cheap recipes 

53 posts for students

high school cheat sheet

other cheat sheets

if one more person comments on my "we need to keep payphones/public phones" post with "what we need are free phone charging stations and wifi hotspots, like in new york!" i am going to lose my mind. what do you people not understand about "not everyone has a smartphone" and "phones can break". how are these new concepts.

Good news: if you’re currently laying around and not producing anything, you are a credit to your species.

another tip, if you forget how to write, read your favorite book

writing tips from your friendly neighborhood author whos about to get published (yay me!)

sorry from the brag in the title but I'm very proud of myself and how much my writing has improved in the past year so i thought I would share some tips that helped me

read alot

analyize the style of authors you enjoy or want to write like (ie: story structure, diction, voice, tone, sentence structure, figurative language) i have a template i use if anyone wants

write daily ( it could be journaling, fanfiction, or even a blog post, writing daily builds a habit, and anything, any words on paper, is better than nothing at all)

if you're stuck, find a quote and write a short story around its use

your first draft is allowed to be crappy, hell it should be, it will never be perfect

it probably will be, but its only supposed to be first one, edit and revise as many times as you need to

tell what happening, show emotions

" she yanked the chair from underneath the desk, and sat down starring at the floor, before putting her forehead flat on the desk" sounds better than " she pulled the chair from underneath the desk, and sat down starring sadly at the ground."