Word Of God Says Santos Was A Gymnast Which Is Interesting In Terms Of Her Backstory But I Get Soccer

hi.

whichever one of you fucks put my fic (vanish into you) into a public rating bookmark collection (and rated my fic 3/5 stars) can you please take it down right now.

i didn’t ask for you to rate my fic. you are unconsentedly rating shit i put HOURS into. HOURS I COULD BE USING STUDYING FOR FINALS. but sorry that i enjoy writing enough i guess??

hell, i dont even care if you rate it 5 stars, or 1 star, but i didnt ask for this, and im sure these others didnt either!! (there’s thousands of them)

this is genuinely upsetting me because as somebody who has a borderline anxiety attack before posting every chapter, it kinda sucks to get indirectly told your work is mediocre! i am insanely self conscious and this doesn’t help. so congrats i guess!

ao3 isn’t even meant to have a rating system. i’m sorry for getting so worked up over this but it is genuinely upsetting.

anyways. please and thank you.

THE PITT | S01E01 "7:00 A.M."

If that took her out, she'll be lucky to make it through this rotation. I got fifty bucks says she doesn't last through this shift. Come on! Put your money where your mouth is. Uh, no. I didn't say anything, okay? And I sure as hell don't have fifty bucks. I'll be this lady's age before I pay off my student loans.

THE PITT -> Similarities between Dr. Trinity Santos and Dr. Frank Langdon

Happy valentine's day w Hyunsik :3

i dont know much about squid game but i would love to hear about your Guys..

hi, yes, these are my Guys. i mean, almost all the characters are my guys, but these guys are my Guys.

one is a migrant laborer who’s working hard to give a decent life to his wife and son, who maintains his humanity and kindness despite being constantly belittled by his boss as he slaves away for months unpaid at a factory.

the other is an investment banker who graduated from a prestigious university only to tank after his embezzling scheme goes south and is currently at his lowest of lows, needing to pay his debts off if only to make sure his mother isn’t hurt by his mistakes. 

they are the friends of all time to me. ignore the fact that they are main characters in the Murder Games™ show.

And another thing:

Regardless of your interpretation of Langdon's relationship with his wife, that man LOVES being a father. He's got a little friendship bracelet that says dad, whenever their is a child tragedy he is already on the phone to hear his kids and make sure they are ok. He bought them a puppy just because his four year old wanted one, desire to make them happy completely overriding any kind of common sense. Just he clearly loves being Dad, he is like daydreaming about mowing the lawn in white New Balance sneakers, he is mentally grilling outside during their birthday parties or whatever.

And there is so much to be explored with regards to how little time he actually gets with them. Residents get almost no time off for anything so you know he misses them and you know he feels guilty and you know the puppy is BECAUSE he feels guilty.

And we talk a lot (as we should) about the resentment that grows in the primary parent at having to be On and expend all their time and energy on caretaking, but it is also possible for the parent who is not there and is spending less time to be resentful of the other parent for GETTING so much time with the kids. IDK I just think it is an interesting thing to think about in terms of his relationship with his wife because he clearly loves those children.

they both have a kink for getting money. sick fuck x crazy bitch.

has dennis seen the sea before. i dont think he has, especially coming from a landlocked state like nebraska. pennsylvania doesn't have a border that connects to the ocean. the only thing close is the shoreline on lake erie (correct me if im wrong). has he ever experienced the sandy shores of the beach, the call of seagulls circling overhead, the feeling of waves crashing against your legs and it's freezing cold but you look forward and the blue against blue seems to stretch on forever. it's a different sort of vastness from the corn fields he grew up in. its nothing like the mesmerizing, rippling digital blues he saw every night on the old tv they were supposed to throw out that he and his brothers snuck into their "secret" treehouse. it's breathtaking. and maybe he'll sit on one of those driftwood logs in cargo shorts soaked to the bone and just breathe, the salty sea air refreshingly unfamiliar. maybe make a sandcastle for the first time. dig up a giant hole in the ground with trinity and fill it up with sea water. and maybe when he looks at her when she laughs as he trips and falls face first into the water at some point, he'll see his older brother's face. think to himself, 'yeah, they'd love it here'.

idk man. growing up in california made me realize just how lucky i am to be able to experience such a variety of settings all in one state. and how it must feel for people well into their teenage or adult years to experience the beauty of the ocean for the first time.

yuri sangihun

ali "gi-hun's angel" abdul was sang-woo's angel, too.

not in the same way, of course.

...

to sang-woo, ali was this wide-eyed, clueless foreigner who was far too kind to be talking to someone like him. he's thankful for the simplest things, while sang-woo strives for perfection to the point of killing him. he said he lived in ansan. he says he'll walk. how can he say that? expecting sang-woo to what, let him? yes, sure, he can't really spare the money, but the idea of this relatively-puppy-looking guy wandering the streets until he finds his way home is not something he needs on his conscience at this time. so he gives him the money, and tells him to stop calling him that damn honorific. there's no need for that. when they get back to the games, ali's back. sang-woo makes a mental note of his strength when gi-hun points it out. he was willing to risk his life for others, too. those are good traits for an ally. sang-woo can make up for any lack of knowledge that might arise. they're a perfect team, when he thinks about it (oh, he'll end up thinking about it alright).

...

after the fight—when they were all banded together like a real team—they now sit to recover. ali looks embarrassed when he mistakes gi-hun's (their) hometown as his name. sang-woo asks for his, because he's a good ally friend. sang-woo hasn't had a friend in years. something about being in debt and going through depressive episode after depressive episode and not being able to look anyone you know in the eyes because how could you? after failing that badly? how could you?

it doesn't hurt like that when ali looks at him. sure, he feels the normal amount of guilt. ali thinks he's pretty kind for that move at the convenience store. he isn't; he knows he isn't. but ali doesn't look at him like gi-hun looks at him, like he's hung every star in the damn universe. ali thinks like that about anyone who treats him like a human. it hurts less, knowing that. sang-woo knows that in order for him to win, ali will have to die. everyone will have to die. he'll worry about that later.

... while they're on a night shift, ali shares his food with him. he's still thinking about the bus fare. why? he's already eaten. there's no reason for ali to starve. he splits it, though, because he doesn't want to refuse for another time.

ssajangnim. ssajangnim. ssajangnim. no one else ever corrects him. sang-woo doesn't know why. it's uncomfortable. he smiles when ali calls him hyung. he doesn't remember the last time he's smiled like this. a genuine smile. it quickly wipes off his face. he's here for money. of course, so is sang-woo. but sang-woo's here for his mom, mainly. he doesn't know why he was stupid enough to use her in his rabbit hole of debt. too late to lament that now. is ali here for his parents?

ali is a parent. he's got a kid. one. a one year old. sang-woo's going to vomit, his eyes prick with tears. he doesn't cry though, he never does. there's no way someone this... good is ever going to make it out of here. he's only taken out of his thoughts when ali asks him the same.

his reason sounds kind of pathetic now. he says it's about money, too.

...

the next game is duo-based. it's a no-brainer. ali's kind enough to look over at gi-hun. sang-woo needs to win. ali needs to win. they could do this.

the rules of the game are explained. sang-woo can't. he can't do this. he's not going to die.

ali's kindness isn't a virtue anymore. it's a liability. the clock is ticking. his flaws get glaringly bright like this. how do you not know what an even number is? sang-woo explains as patiently as he can. how is he winning. sang-woo was the intelligent one, wasn't he? he was the one who went to business school. hell, this is a guessing game. how the hell is ali winning? it's just like his debt. he's failing. he's failing at the one thing he's supposed to be good at. ali must be cheating. he has to be. sang-woo can't be failing again. he can't fail again.

the clock is ticking. sang-woo feels sick to his stomach. he begs, he pleads, he... he's looking at rocks. he turns to ali. he has a plan.

... "player 199, eliminated." sang-woo feels like he's being compressed by a machine. he breathes out and everything aches. he keeps walking. ... sang-woo's eating alone. funny, how most of his meals would be by ali's side. shared with him. shared with a friend. but friends come and go. he only knew ali for a couple days. it's not that special, he thinks.

his hands are shaking. ... he's fucking outraged at that husband. how could he not go on, huh? didn't he love his wife? didn't he care about her? how could he sit there, knowing her corpse is somewhere out there where he can't even retrieve it. he wants to give up the money? he wants to make her worthless? he grabs that man by the collar and gives him a piece of his mind. that night, he thinks about ali. really thinks about it. fuck, he was such a bastard. that man had a wife, a kid... things he'll never have. things he took away from him. kind, naive ali. he had more heart than sang-woo ever had, that's for sure. deserved more too. an angel, he remembers gi-hun saying. well, he doesn't have ali anymore. he tore those wings out when he betrayed him. he doesn't need an angel, in here. he needs to survive. he'll do whatever it takes. he can't fuck up now. he couldn't before, either. but not now. not after what he's done. ... player 069 is hanging from the metal frame, lifeless. was it what he said? no time to dwell on it, he thinks to himself, swallowing the feeling of guilt that blooms in his chest.