The Cure To All Sadness Is Indulging Is Nostalgic Content Nobody Can Prove Me Otherwise

on the bright side one of my packages arrived but the quality kinda sucked :/ That one’s on me though, ordered from a bad seller

A possible turnaround

Though it’s been a while since I’ve started my new room project, I’ve surprisingly faced no burnout so far. It seems like life’s being suspiciously nice to me, which gets me a bit on edge- but I’ll do my best to enjoy it while I can.

My parents have approved of my drawings for my room plan, thankfully. That’s a greenlight for me to continue to clean up completely motivated! And even though I can’t exactly feel it on account of some amount of emotional numbness, I do prefer the kind of energy I’m getting from this than anything I’ve felt before. It’s just a happy feeling, out of the blue, unprompted. I no longer want to do nothing, sink into the ground, or cry- I just want to continue and smile?

It feels good to make progress on accomplishing my dream! I’ve also made a custom search engine for myself earlier today- just to fit my dream as well.

Usually I’d show it to my friends, but if they ask why, “I’m trying to change my entire personality and life” doesn’t exactly sound swell from the other end. No worries though- they’ll know a completely different person by the end of this!

I’m off to clean, I’ll make another post later! 

<3 Caramel

no

no I don’t think I deserve this. Doesn’t help me get out of my situation but I really don’t see why I deserved all this because I do try to be decent I really do try it’s just that misfortune gets me and now it’s got a grip on my motivation.

This time I really don’t think I brought this upon myself because at the start I didn’t do anything wrong, I wasn’t lazy or anything I just suffered the consequences of bad luck and since then it’s been a negative feedback loop

I wish God existed because then maybe things would’ve been alright and maybe people wouldn’t need to suffer needlessly and have their lives withheld from them

But still I’ve been praying a lot more recently

-Caramel

Chocolate ganache cake + matcha latte

:)

Awhhh hello <3 :)

You keep me going!

I love scrolling through your blog sm it’s so cozy :33

Somehow teleporting the silly little guy to you :3

AHHHHH omg thank you!!! I'll keep posting sweet things for you<3 (⁠｡⁠ﾉ⁠ω⁠＼⁠｡⁠)

[guy recieved.]

Lazy

Ahhhhh

Spring break has really made me lazy. I thought I had the capability to laze around day after day if undisturbed, but it seems I do end up getting restless from time to time. Can't believe I'm even allowed to lie in my bed for eleven more days. Hopefully, I'll take this time to clean up, draw, and study instead.

Overall, it's nice to see myself actually want to do something instead of feeling content doing nothing at all. Glad I'm not completely devoid of energy- can't wait to see what the break brings!

I worked so hard to make myself lunch, but now I worry there won't be any left for me...

When I lose my extra weight and get a work habit and rearrange my room and get energy and work more it's over for everybody

Pacing

I've got to get myself into order. Instead of having manic highs and depressive lows every couple weeks, I should really be balancing out whatever I'm feeling instead.

Been feeling not too great the past and pretty confused for the past while due to trying to make sense of social stuff but honestly today I'm feeling a little better

Also today I feel halfway okay about my appearance so I'm pretty glad about that

Wondering how summer school's going to be on monday

Caramel