Chaotic Good

6 VIII 2021

went back home

sleep: good, finally, although it's already almost 3 and i'm still up so i gotta go be unconscious for a few hours soon

concentration: fine

phone time: fine

did some measure theory, only this today and i'm in love, shit's fucking amazing

tomorrow i'll probably do more measure theory and possibly some coding

I think "high value person" can be interpreted as "someone who is liked by everyone and perfectly adheres to social norms" but also as "someone who wants to find their core values and to this end tries many different approaches" and many other things. some of the things listed are pretty good, such as "take care of themselves" or "doesn't equate their worth to sex", some are unnecessary: "perfected first impressions" or "ALWAYS well-dressed". naah, who cares lol

the thing with self-improvement or other forms of conscious existing (I just invented this term, by that I mean something like chosing which parts of oneself to keep and which to change) is that one must start somewhere. it's nice, in general, to have social relationships, sex life or hobbies and I see this list as a guideline for increasing the probability of achieving those and other things in a certain way

in my opinion it's really important to keep in check with oneself, ask if the cost of being likeable and elegant is worth it. some people derive pleasure from wearing nice clothes and make-up, I am not one of them and for me that would be too much of a sacrifice. I guess most people would hate to have my lifestyle: I basically do math all day. it is my decision to so, it's fun, and I hate it when someone assumes that it's bad just because they wouldn't enjoy it

hence I see this controversial list as goals of someone who genuinely wants to be perfect. and yeah I do think that most of those things are completely unnecessary, I don't consider this set of characteristics as a "high value person" but maybe some people do. a part of self-improvement for me was realizing that I don't care about most things and this post reminded me that there might exist people who care about everything. have they not yet realized that they actually don't care? idk, maybe they do care

but yeah if someone came to me and said that this list objectively defines a high value person then I would laugh lol I will respect everyone's values if they respect mine

" 'They' isn't singular!" Oh yeah? Show me its multiplicative inverse matrix then.

I love reading stuff on abstract geometry because there'll be some extremely complicated construction of abstract polytopes that takes up like two full pages

and the first example is this

and you're like "wow that's a cube :)"

and then the next example is this

Astronaut sculpture from an ex-physicist (Source/Credit)

Me, playing poker: Man, I fold

The sphere sat across the table: yes?

ok i get it now, most people need plans and structures so then they can study what they're really into in the future

btw today i'm doing operations on topo spaces, i love that already

i gotta say i don't buy all them planning strategies and tips that require more effort than just sitting and doing the work

i mean that might help some people but i find that when i am doing something important to me i need no plans nor do i need motivation, i also don't procrastinate, everything falls into its right place

and if achieving something takes so much effort in preparation, is this even supposed to be a thing? idk, maybe that's the reason why i have no external proof of my work lol

The proof is left as an exercise to the IRS

omg so that's why so many empty blogs follow me. I've been blocking them at first assuming that they were bots, but at some point the usernames started sounding way too normal-human-like, so I stopped, my instinct told me something else was going on. lemme just unblock all the empty blogs now, damn, I'm so sorry to everyone who wanted to follow me but was blocked out of habit!!

fun fact!! it turns out that now when u make a new blog, tumblr forces you to follow 3-4 people before you can change your icon or modify your blog in any way!! this, of course, means that, yes, some of the "potential bots" many of us have been automatically blocking could have possibly been genuine new users who were only just seconds in to having an account!!! tumblr is literally screwing new users over!!!!