Im?? Sobbing????
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!! I bring my followers a longish comic with some Damian feels, I hope you like it :)
Commission Info / Kofi (members get comics a week early)
my tips for students that struggle with consistency
And what? Tell that man to stop having such a slutty lil waist then đ€đ€đ€
âTHATS MY WIFE!đ«”â and itâs a man old enough to be your fatherâŠ
im literally not exaggerating when i tell you guys this video saved my life
Too many beds
Accidentally kidnapping a mafia boss
Really nice guy who hates only you
Academic rivals except itâs two teachers who compete to have the best class
Divorce of convenience
Too much communication
True hateâs kiss (only kissing your enemy can break a curse)
Dating your enemyâs sibling
Lovers to enemies
Hate at first sight
Love triangle where the two love interests get together instead
Fake amnesia
Soulmates who are fated to kill each other
Strangers to enemies
Instead of fake dating, everyone is convinced that you arenât actually dating
Too hot to cuddle
Love interest CEO is a himbo/bimbo who runs their company into the ground
Nursing home au
I LOVE THIS SO MUCH PLEASE TATTOO IT INTO MY EYEBALL SO I ALWAYS HAVE IT WITH ME
How to get fined and expose people | CL16
Charles Leclerc x detective! Reader
Summary: This is the story of how Charles Leclerc finds love, and brings down an entire corrupt organisation, but that's just the background plot. Not really though. Come for the plot, stay for the rookies.
Warning(s): Mild Language, Drivers being idiots, plotting schemes, the FIA is shit? But we've been known about that. Driver shenanigans. Y/N will be introduced next chapter actually.
Part 1 ~Series Masterlist~
"I'm in the business of misery, let's take it from the top."
Charles didnât know why he agreed to this.
Probably because Carlos texted âmandatory group therapy at Lando's, bring snacks or fuck offâ and then followed it with a thumbs-up emoji.
And Charles, being the responsible, curious idiot he was, thought "yes, therapy sounds lovely."
Instead, he found himself in the middle of a Monaco flat that smelled suspiciously spring rolls, and something that could only be described as âboy.â
Carlos was already there, legs stretched across Landoâs coffee table like he paid the mortgage.
Alex had brought a six-pack of something suspiciously non-alcoholic, which Max was side-eyeing like it had personally insulted his mother.
âSo,â Lando said, flopping onto the couch beside Charles, âhave you heard of this fucking absurdity theyâre actually pushing forward with now?â
Max, who had his entire upper body halfway into the fridge, let out a groan. âYou mean the swearing thing? Godverdomme. Bunch of fuckers," he poked his head out the fridge, "Lando! Thereâs no Red Bull in here. I hate this place.â
Lando didnât even look up. âWe donât carry Red Bull in this house. This is a Monster Energy zone.â
âFuck you, mate.â Max slammed the fridge door and grabbed a questionable-looking apple. âHope your sink clogs.â
"Eat shit, Max"
Charles rubbed his face. âSo we get fined for swearing ? Like... for real? Real money?â
âReal our money,â Alex chimed in. âForty grand for a âfuck.â Eighty if you say it while looking too sexy.â
Carlos snorted. âIâd be broke by lunch.â
âCabrĂłn,â Lando wheezed, âyouâd be fined just for existing with that hair.â
That was when Charles looked over. Carlosâ hair really was⊠suspiciously shiny. Glossy, not greasy. Regal, almost. Did it move in the light? Was that a beam of sunshine catching it just so? It was giving shampoo commercial in the best, most infuriating way.
Carlos noticed him staring. Flicked his head just slightly, like a slow-mo ad.
âDonât even try, mate. Itâs genetics. L'OrĂ©al Paris tried to bottle this, saying it was them.â He smirked.
âThey failed. Obviously. No shampoo can handle this kind of fabulous.â
Alex nearly spit his drink. âDonât let George hear you say that. Heâll sob into his Dyson.â
Carlos scoffed. âGeorge can do all the Dyson-sponsored TikToks he wants. But this,â he gestured dramatically to his hair,
âthis is art.â
âMore like black magic,â Charles muttered.
Why did it feel like he was in an alternate reality?
Then, slightly louder, âDo you think theyâd fine me if I told the FIA to go fuck themselves in song?â
âTheyâd probably double it,â Lando said. âAdd royalties.â
âFIA peuvent aller se faire foutre,â Charles said, with all the elegance of a penguin.
âThatâs the spirit!â Alex raised his glass. âEuropean flair with a hint of rage.â
Max bit into his sad apple and frowned. âSeriously, where is the money going? Like... forty grand? For saying what 'shit'?â
He looked around. âThatâs a new set of tires. Thatâs a Rolex. Thatâs a very, very expensive escort in Amsterdam.â
"....................."
Max shrugged. âWhat? I googled.â
âThey never tell us anything,â Charles muttered. âAll these fines. These âregulations.â And not once do they show us receipts.â
There was a pause. Then, deadpan, Charles added, âGosh, I wish we could just, you know, secretly pay someone to find out what the fuck theyâre doing with our money.â
That got murmurs of agreement. Alex said something about shady Swiss bank accounts.
Then the Thai muttered, âbet theyâre using it for private jet charters and...uh..body wax. Yes.â
Lando, unusually quiet, sat forward.
He looked at all of them, dead seriousâwell, as serious as Lando Norris could look while wearing socks with little racecars on them.
âI actually might know someone who can help us.â
Everyone froze. Even Max stopped chewing.
âYouâre not joking,â Charles said, brow raised.
âNo,â Lando said, eyes gleaming. âNot even a little bit.â
âWho?â Alex asked, suddenly intrigued.
Lando just grinned like the cat that swallowed the paddock. âLetâs just say⊠theyâve got the skills. And zero respect for authority.â
Charles leaned forward. âAre they hot?â
âObviously,â Lando said. âI donât work with amateurs.â
Max pointed the apple core at him. âIf they get us arrested, Iâm blaming you.â
âYouâre Dutch. Youâll probably be the one who gets us in jail.â
"Why are you being racist towards me, oh my god"
"Shut up guys" Carlos groans.
Charles, for his part, leaned back and stared at the ceiling. This was insane. Utterly idiotic. Deeply illegal, maybe.
But alsoâŠ
"I'm in" He says as he looks around at the faces of the drivers around him, all slowly starting to smile.
If I didn't know what was going on, I'd think it was creepy if they started smiling at me at the same time.
"Want a monster, Max?"
"Fuck off, Norris"
"I've got a monster, it's in my paâ"
"CARLOS!"
_________________________
From his window seat near the front of the jet, Charles Leclerc glanced over at the quietest part of the planeâa square foot of peace occupied by Jack Doohan, fully unconscious, hoodie over his face, and completely unaffected by the circus onboard.
Unfortunately, the rest of the jet was a violently different experience.
âI can literally just ask him,â Max growled, shoving a Red Bull can into the cupholder like it personally offended him. âHe works for me. I pay him.â
âUgh, youâre such a Libra,â Lando groaned, sprawled across his seat sideways, his feet on Carlos' lap, like a particularly irritating cat.
âThatâs not the point, Maxie. Itâs my secret mission. You get to be the muscle.â
âIâm literally a four-time world champion.â
âAnd yet youâve got the mystery-solving skills of a wet paper towel.â
Max threw an empty redbull can at him. Lando caught it and aimed it perfectly at a bin, all while grinning at Max.
Max thinks if he kills Lando right now, everyone in the jet would be considered an accomplice and he wouldn't be alone in prison.
But the rookies have such bright futures ahead. His brain whispered to him. It sounded like GP.
So he just leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes, trying to calm down.
één...twee..drie
Nearby, Oscar was curled up by the window, fast asleep like an angel in a hoodie.
Alex was standing in the aisle infront of his seat, camera up, trying desperately to snap embarrassing shots of Oscar sleepingâbut George, unfortunately, was in the background of every shot, adjusting his own angles and muttering under his breath.
âWhy do I look like a melted Victorian candle in every photo?â George scowled at his reflection in the mirror of his phone.
âMaybe you just have that vibe,â Alex said cheerfully. âHaunted British antique. Sort of works for you.â
âOh, shut it.â
Meanwhile, the rookies had claimed the back half of the jet like a boarding school on wheels.
Kimi Antonelli and Ollie Bearman had found the mini wine bar and were crouched in front of it like they were preparing for battle.
Gabriel Bortoleto stood behind them, arms crossed, clearly helpingâthough his version of help mightâve just been reading the French labels out loud and offering strong opinions on corks.
âGuys, Iâm just saying, this Bordeaux is probably older than us,â Gabriel murmured.
âPerfect,â Kimi said, yanking on the wine fridge handle like it had wronged him in a past life, it wouldn't budge.
Ollie opened another fridge and blinked at the vast array of redbull cans in it, "this bitch empty, just redbull," he turned to Kimi, "keep going, whatever is in there, it's sure to be iconic"
âIt's sure to be Illegal,â muttered Liam Lawson from nearby, but he was distractedâhe and Isack Hadjar were both gazing around the jet like tourists on a class trip. âI think this jet is bigger than my first apartment.â
âMate, I think this jet is bigger than my entire family tree,â Isack replied.
Max sighed loudly, watching them from the aisle with arms crossed. âThis is the first time my jet has ever felt so.⊠full.â
Lando didnât even glance up from his phone. âThatâs because you have no friends.â
âFuck you, Lando.â
âSee, this is why you donât get invited to things.â
âYouâre in my jet!â
âYeah, and somehow still regretting letting you convince me to take it.â
Next to a silently cursing Max, Charles was doing his best not to lose his mind while getting absolutely obliterated by Carlos at chess.
âI donât even know why you try anymore,â Carlos said smugly, adjusting a bishop with entirely too much confidence.
âYou're not even that good,â Charles muttered, glaring at the board like it had personally insulted his family. âYou just talk so much I forget what my next move is.â
âYouâre doing amazing, sweetie,â Carlos cooed in a faux-dramatic voice, it reminded Charles of that one clip with Kris and Kylie Jenner.
âYou already said that to Alex.â
Carlos smirked. âAre you jealous?â
Charles made a noise that was definitely not a denial and absolutely not a pout, then turned his attention toward Oscar, still asleep, and Alex, who was trying to get a picture of him,
but kept being photobombed by George adjusting his jawline and moving his hand through his hair.
âYouâre ruining the shot with your hair, George,â Alex whined.
âMy hair is the shot!â George snapped.
From the back, Ollie raised his voice over the chaos. âGuys! I canât believe weâre actually doing this! Like, full-blown operation.â
The rookies nodded solemnly around him like this was the Avengers assembling.
âI heard about the driver strike,â Isack whispered reverently.
âSame,â Liam said. âAbsolute carnage.â
The older drivers exchanged glances across the cabin.
Silent, knowing. They hadnât meant to bring the rookies.
In fact, they'd specifically tried not to tell them. But somehow, all five of them had been at the airport when the group arrivedâalready packed, caffeinated, and suspiciously ready.
They probably have a group chat.
âJust how bad can it be?â Max muttered to no one in particular.
Which, in their language, meant incredibly bad. Catastrophic. Delicious.
Charles leaned toward Lando, still scowling from his chess loss, and asked, âThis person weâre staying with... do they at least have air conditioning?â
Lando just smiled, far too pleased with himself.
âYouâll find out soon enough.â
Charles blinked. âYouâre enjoying this too much.â
âMe?â Lando said. âNever.â
Max leaned over. âCan we please just land already. I swear if I donât get on land soon, Iâll throw Lando out the door.â
âYou wouldnât,â the brit said, grinning. âYou love me too much.â
Max growled. âIâd aim for the rocks.â
From the back of the jet came a loud crash.
âWHO GAVE KIMI A CORKSCREW?â someone yelled.
Charles closed his eyes.
This was fine. This was normal. It's only been two hours since the sunrise. This is normal.
This was definitely going to blow up on their faces.
________________________
The plane landed with a subtle bump and an ominous silence.
It wasnât the silence of anticipation, or awe, or respect.
It was the silence of what the fuck is this.
Charles looked out the window, squinting against the blinding daylight.
Grass. Dirt. More grass. A single squirrel, maybe. And in the far, far distanceâwhat looked like a manor? Or possibly a haunted vineyard. It was hard to say.
âDid we crash into a farm?â Maxâs voice cut through the cabin, sharp and offended.
âIs this someone's private field? Where are the buildings? Where are the people? Why does it smell like hay?â
Charles blinked. âI think thereâs an estate over there.â He pointed vaguely, like that would solve anything.
Carlos leaned over Charlesâs shoulder. âBig house. Very big. Like⊠murder-for-inheritance-big.â
âDefinitely too big,â Alex muttered. âItâs like, really far, two days of walking maybe.â
âYou didnât even bring extra snacks!â Isaack groaned, dragging his hoodie over his head like a defeated blanket ghost.
âMy phone wonât load anything!â Liam added.
âDo you guys⊠not have Wi-Fi?â Gabriel asked, looking horrified, like someone had just said âdial-up internet.â
âLando,â Carlos said calmly, turning in his seat, âyou didnât get us a driverâs lounge receiver?â
âYou didnât even ask for it, and because weâre not at a normal airport,â Lando said cheerfully. âWeâre on a secret mission."
Then he frowned at everyone. âGod, youâre all so entitled.â
Max looked like he was ready to commit violence. âYou kidnapped me from my home and flew me to a barn.â
âIt's not a barn,â Lando sniffed, perking up. âOh! Look, the van's here.â
Everyone turned.
A huge black van rumbled down the dirt road, kicking up dust like it had emerged from the void. It was the kind of van that looked suspicious in a very Netflix docuseries sort of way.
Lando, inexplicably cheerful, clapped his hands. âAlright! Group up! Bagsâwell, donât bother, theyâll get delivered. Everyone count off.â
He started pointing as the drivers started moving towards the exit. âMax, Jack, Carlosârookies with Carlos pleaseâthey're you go Kimi âCarlos hold on to Ollie, he looks a bit peakyâIsack, Gabriel, Alex, George, Charlesââ he hesitated.
Someone cleared their throat.
âUh⊠guys?â said Liam awkwardly from the back. âI think Oscarâs still asleep.â
There was a beat of silence.
Carlos blinked. âWe were going to leave a man behind.â
âTypical,â Max grunted. âMcLaren drivers. Useless.â
âIâm right here,â Lando said.
âExactly, I'm not talking about Oscar.â
"Gosh Max, you're so rude to me."
Jack yawned so hard his jaw cracked. Isack stumbled into Gabriel, who stumbled into Kimi, who was holding a bottle of Maxâs $800 wine like it was a sippy cup.
Ollie was giggling at nothing.
Charles gave them all a long, quiet stare.
They were flushed. Sweaty. Slightly glassy-eyed. He could practically see the wine fumes floating around them like ghosts of bad decisions.
He pressed his fingers to his temples.
If one of these kids died of alcohol poisoning on his watch, heâd have to personally call their parents. Explaining things in English to Isaack Hadjarâs French-Algerian mother? He shuddered. He didnât have the range.
But then he looked again.
They were⊠fine. A little wobbly. Very jetlagged. Possibly wine-poisoned. But alive.
âSurprisingly resilient,â he murmured.
âI once saw Kimi eat a whole jalapeño pepper at a press event,â George, whispered. âHeâs built different.â
âDo we get Oscar or justâleave him?â Liam asked, visibly considering it.
âOh my god,â Alex groaned. âWe are the worst people.â
âIâll get him,â Max said, turning back toward the jet.
âWait,â Charles called. "Give him a bottle of water. And maybe tim tams, they're in my bag. He gets violent when he wakes up hungry.â
âIâm awake,â Oscarâs voice mumbled faintly from behind them, blanket around his shoulders like a sleepy gremlin.
âJesus,â Max jumped. âWhere did you come from?â
âDreamland,â Oscar muttered. âWhy is the ground moving?â
âItâs...not,â George said.
Oscar blinked. âOh.â
The van honked.
Lando gestured like he was conducting an orchestra. âAlright, children. Into the mystery van. Weâre going to meet someone very special.â
âIs it Santa?â Ollie asked, slightly slurring.
âI hope itâs a doctor,â Isack said.
âOr a therapist,â Gabriel muttered.
âCan I lie down?â Jack asked no one in particular.
Max pushed past everyone. âI swear to god, if this place we're staying at, doesn't have Redbull Iâm suing you, Lando.â
Charles stepped off the jet last, the warm sun hitting him like a slap in the face. Dirt underfoot. Weird smells. A probably-haunted manor in the distance.
He sighed.
Carlos stood next to him, yawning. âSo, do we trust this van?â
âNo,â Charles said immediately. âBut Iâm too tired to care.â
Lando stood infront of all the drivers, and beamed at them.
âWelcome to phase two, bitches!â
Charles closed his eyes and whispered a prayer.
_______________________
Vrrrroooom.
The van jerked forward, spitting up gravel, and took off down the path like it had somewhere much more important to be.
Charles watched it vanish down the road with a rising sense of unease. âHe justâhe just left.â
âHe LEFT?â Lando echoed, stepping out and raising his hands dramatically.
âI mean, yeah, obviously he left. That was the plan.â
âWait, what do you mean that was the plan?â Carlos asked, frowning.
âI told him to drop us off and go. Yâknow. In case someone was following us.â
âFollowing us?â Charles turned so fast he nearly pulled something. âWhy would someone be following us? Lando what the actual fuââ
âI donât know,â Lando shrugged. âFelt dramatic. Adds to the vibes.â
âVibes?â Alex said, voice cracking. âWeâre eleven drivers, some of whom are legally still teenagers, abandoned outside a giant murder mansion with no Wi-Fi or food, and your priority is vibes?â
The silence that followed was broken only by the distant sound of someoneâs stomach growling. Possibly Isaackâs. Or Charlesâ, Hard to say.
The wind picked up. The ivy rustled.
The manor stood still and silent before them. Waiting.
Charles shoved his hands into his hoodie pocket and sighed.
âFucking brilliant,â he muttered. âThis is how horror movies start. And weâre the dumbass cast.â
"You think they will make a documentary about us if we go missing?" It was one of the rookies, one who didn't sound drunk, so maybe Jack or Liam.
Charles wasn't sure anymore.
He groaned out loud again.
It wasn't even noon yet.
___________________________________________
Thank you for reading!
If you liked this part, please leave a like, a comment and a reblog!
I wrote this before I got into the accident, and now I've decided this is going to be my coping muse. I'm doing better now, getting the electroshock therapy and I have gained a weird obsession with yogurt of all things. Love you all.
Also, for anyone who didn't see the post, the Taglist is closed (Don't want to make another one, I'm way too tired for all of that)
As an alternate option, You can follow the tag "Julie's F1 rambles" this tag will only have my works.
JulesâĄ
Taglist: @anamiad00msday @evie-119 @that-one-little-soybean @six-call @stressed-cherry @il0vereadingstuff @whatevenisthisxxxxx @freyathehuntress @verstappen-leclerc-inchident @allthings-fandoms @larastark3107 @myescapefromthislife @wertyuizxcvbnm @halleest @hs2016 @lucyysthings @justaf1girl @bernelflo @mendes-bae @chelseyyouraverageluigi @llando4norris @sid-is-gr8 @henna006 @hurtblossom @quinquinquincy @ts1mp0ne @spidercat-soccerfan @kodzuvk @wherethefuckisthething @hellowgoodbye @prttylight @l4ndonorizz @edgyficuselastica @charlesgirl16 @chloes-book-corner @1mverstappen @inchidentofftrack @blackmage24 @angelluv16 @alice-went-away @teamnovalak @wierdflowerpower @sunshine-and-midnight-rain @maxswhore33 @glow-ish @lazybot @weekendlusting @milky-rose2 @sugarfreerbr @prttylight @martygraciesversion381
TW: A shit load of reading. tears, and feels, lots of them. Also this was inspired by the sentence in bold which I was going to use in my standardized test writing section. And this makes no sense chronologically (im adhd af alright.)Â
Voting is important because if there was a vote then Sirius Black wouldnât have spent 12 worthless years in Azkaban and harry wouldnât have been raised in an abusive household rather with wolfstar dadfoot and mommy.
Harry wouldâve known all about the marauders and by the time he enters Hogwarts he knows all the secret passages and where to find the map. He also knows where to hide from Filtch, prefects doing their rounds and teachers. Harry has long since been an animagus. He wouldâve entered knowing all about his parents (siriusly all about them, good and the bad.) he would have entered being a pranking god and reusing some of his dads old tricks. Every time Harry pranks he gets a howler from Sirius about how proud he in which sirius proceeds to flirt w Dumbledore, gossip w Minnie, tell Draco to tell his dad that heâs a bitch, also tell Draco that if he doesnât stay over for christmas he will have to listen to Sirius sending a howler everyday of him singing, and then Sirius going on to roast tf outta snivellus and properly cuss him out (he also adds in some hair flips and talks ab how supperior he is.) Harry 100% would call minerva Minnie and Minnie would be like a grandma who visited a l l t h e t I m e. He would be a flying god by the time he enters Hogwarts and is immediately on the team (Sirius likes to credit himself but we all know it was Minnies excellent coaching.) In first year when he has to get the sorcerers stone he roasts tf outta voldy âI thought a bitch who couldnât kill a fucking baby said sum,â âno literally mate you coulda just thrown me out the window but noooo,â âdonât talk to me till you get a nose you fuckin wanker.â Harry wouldâve flirted with Dumbledore to get out of detentions. Harry wouldâve grown up hearing stories about Regulas and about Siriusâs family and how he was brought up. Instead of shutting down Malfoy he wouldâve frickin adopted him and they would be bffs; as close as Sirius and James. Malfoy would 100% join in on pranks and plan some of them but he would never get caught. Harry hating Lockhart and cONSTANTLY pranking him (almost as much as he pranks snivey) Harry constantly reminding him of how his uncles repeatedly outranked him for the hottest wizard award. When Harry is sorted he wouldâve been a MAJOR hat stall because the hat would really push for him to be in his true house *cough cough slytherin* but harry doesnât want to leave Malfoy, he also doesnât want to leave Minnie nor does he want to leave his parents house (and uncles) and most of all, he doesnât want ANYTHING to do with Snape. Instead he meets Ron and Mione in the house and introduces them to Draco, at first Draco really doesnât like them but once he starts to know them he questions his families teaching (silently of course) and decides he doesnât want to be like them. Harry being bffs with Nott, Zabini and Pansy (they were all actually crucial in the taking down of the dark lord. When Harry hangs out with them it's just all sass and sarcasm and dark jokes (the number of people they have SCARRED). Draco and Mione being the only responsible ones and help them study all the time. Draco and Harry never sitting separately and if they do they always find some other way to communicate. Draco and Harry sitting at each others house tables ALL THE TIME and it really pisses Snape off (that may or may not be why they do it.) Draco hating Snape with a passion and yelling at him whenever heâs mean to Mione. All four of them having nicknames for each other. Draco and Mione came up w a playbook together with long elaborate shit like âinitiate Page 387 paragraph 4 up section 3 clause 12.â Draco and Mione tying for first every year. God help everyone when they start to compare owls. TH E S L E E P O V E R S. All of them spending so much time in the kitchens. Draco is soooo nice to house elves because of that and actually co-founds S.P.E.W. Draco and his Slytherin friends sleeping in the Gryffindor common rooms because the password is too bigoted and they refuse to say it. The golden trio promptly begins to help, Mione looks for a spell to reverse it, Harry and Ron forcefully trying to remove the portrait meanwhile Neville brings snacks, blankets and says that they did a good job (Neville also being the one the Slytherins go to when they feel bad because of blood supremacy, Neville promptly reminding them that the fact that you feel bad and refuse it shows how good you truly are.) All of them are Neville defence squad and Neville supremacy 100%. They all repeatedly tell him how they would die for him. Draco hating Bellatrix for what he did to Neville. Draco and Harry immediately trade schedules to see what classes they share and swapping common room passwords. Draco is actually an heir of Slytherin but they all know its not him doing the attacks. Draco being with Harry in the chamber and trying his best to call off the basilisk while also telling Tom how he disgraces the Slytherin name. Draco being so nice to muggle-borns and creates a club where he helps them adjust to the Wizarding World (Sirius hears and promptly send sweets and howlers about how proud he is saying âI knew he was good oh you Lucius spawn you Iâm so proud.â) Draco being really happy because Sirius knows that the Sacred 28 families look down upon affection so he doesnât get told this by his parents. Sirius dotes on Draco always giving him affection because of this. The first time it happened Draco was like âwhat is thisâ and the golden trioâs heart broke, from then on they always display physical affection to him, hand holding, hugs forehead kisses, pet names you name it.) Draco also crying a lot because itâs the first time heâs had this since he was like 2 and doesnât think he deserves it because of how his parents are. Draco threatening anyone who says shit about any of them and the four being as close as the marauders (so much so that all the teachers have flashbacks and ptsd from all the pranks.) Harry H A T I N G Snape for all the shit he did and calling him snivellus. Sirius hears and cries because heâs so fucking proud. Harry having to be held back from tackling Snape anytime he makes a lily reference. God have mercy for anyone who was unfortunate enough to be there when he saw snapes patronus because âitâs not love you nazi bitch! you fucking betrayed her and then got all but hurt you stalker esque bitch.â Remus literally keeping Sirius 100% in the loop when he is dada teacher man knows everything going on. Harry going to Hogsmade only to see Sirius âcoincidentallyâ there. Sirius and Draco actually having a lot in common and Sirius completely loves the kid like wtf heâs Malfoy blood I have to hate him. When Voldey returns Draco beating up anyone who calls Harry a liar. Draco working as a spy for the order and doing little undetected acts of rebellion to help Harry. Instead of outright trying to be disowned Draco just uses everything to his advantage and is on the umbitch (Draco came up w the name) too spy yet again and healing anyone who had to use the fucking quill. In seventh year Draco and Neville begin to really work together and really like each other (platonically though) but god they are so FUCKING SARCASTIC WHEN THEYâRE TOGETHER. Draco teaching Occulmency and how to pretend like you're being Cruciod. Draco and Neville being actual besties. At the battle of Hogwarts Draco saving both Sirius and Remus and calls them both dad (they both teared up a LOT.) In the battle of Hogwarts Sirius shows up and fuckin runs over voldy w his motorcycle, Sirius also bringing a machine gun and going insane. Draco ends up killing nagini and his aunt. Draco also being known as a savior.
like how much would it cost if i were to THEORETICALLY order one of amazon.Â
where do I find a Seth Acosta??
Ok so we are all clearly never going to be over the fact that Dumbledore is hella biased towards Gryffindor/Potter and how Snape was incredibly biased towards  Slytherins. Nobody has talked about how the Hogwarts students are biased, I mean in the books where Harry hasnât fucked shit up and got to see the sorting these little ELEVEN year olds would get booed for being Slytherins. How do you think those muggle-born Slytherins (we all know they exist) felt, the might notâve even known who Voldemort is, they just knew they got into the house of ambition. Those eleven year olds wouldâve been confused and hurt. Then they continue to be shunned by a majority of the school and some of the teachers, when there were quidditch matches between Gryffindor and Slytherin it was unsafe for either house to walk around alone. Yes, Iâll admit there have been terrible Slytherins like Voldemort, but I fear the people who stab me in the back more than I fear those who admit theyâre evil. Voldemort was evil he never tried to tell others he wasnât, Dumbledore on the other hand kept all his cards to himself, he manipulated people and was hella secretive. What about Peter Pettigrew? The Harry Potter characters focused on the evil Slytherins, MERLIN WAS A SLYTHERIN FOR FUCKS SAKE! The greatest wizard of all time was a SLYTHERIN!Â
Thank you for attending my ted talk.Â
ITS MARCH YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
"And if you stop baiting every interracial couple with undeniable chemistry, who will racist stans hate on because they can't comprehend their attractive white male lead with a women of color, Nickelodeon"
"Oh thats not-"
"No in a sense that!"
50 posts