Cor Blimey! This Is A Rollercoaster Of A Monologue Performed By Russil Tamsen. It Was Written By One

Chapter 5 of the new sci-fi novel, Engineer Your Perfect Child, by Bett Correa, as narrated by Russil Tamsen. 10 mins. Original on Amazon here. 

In this chapter, two gangleaders - a gruff hero and a slippery materialist - bump heads in a futuristic strip club in Lima, Peru. Pedro is prying to find out what happened to several street kids he mentors who have been mysteriously kidnapped and returned brain-dead. 

This also happens to be the third book I've personally edited. The author said about this reading, and I quote: "This is SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE IT!!" One exclamation point is quite sufficient, says my inner book editor.

All rights reserved. Russil Tamsen: narrator, comic improv actor, book editor, and author of 21 ebooks. Please visit my ebookstore at QuirkEbooks.com and follow audiobooknarrator. Know a piece of Tumblr fiction that deserves a great reader? Run it by me!

An audience member at a recent fiction open mic suggested that I ought to apply my talent for character voices to the presumably exciting field of prank phone calls. I wasn't quite sure how to take that...

Quirky little flash fiction by Niven aka monkeyerror, as narrated by Russil Tamsen. 5 mins. Original text here.

It's about a bored chick whose day at home is interrupted by a perp on the run, breaking and entering. She nearly fractures his arm using furniture in self defense, but as the two get to know each other he turns out to be as harmless as wet noodles.

Whoa, dude, I think that guy was Spiccoli's brother.

All rights reserved. Russil Tamsen: narrator, comic improv actor, book editor, and author of 21 ebooks. Please visit my ebookstore at QuirkEbooks.com and follow audiobooknarrator. Know a piece of Tumblr fiction that deserves a great reader? Run it by me!

The rough and tumble erotic story of disturbia by Molly Cupcakes, They'd Fucked Five Times So Far. Russil Tamsen's second audio version of the piece. 3 mins. Written text here.

It's fascinating how different acting choices by a speaker can create vastly different results. This was the first time I'd ventured two very different versions of a story, and it was enlightening. Feedback from one listener of the first version got me imagining how this flash fiction story would sound delivered in a normal narrator's voice. Using a resonant, understated approach, one that let the language do all the legwork: a very different choice from overstated version one.

To me it sounds really good this way. It might possibly be the better choice!

All rights reserved. Russil Tamsen: narrator, comic improv actor, book editor, and author of 21 ebooks. Please visit my ebookstore at QuirkEbooks.com and follow audiobooknarrator. Know a piece of Tumblr fiction that deserves a great reader? Run it by me!

At The Whisky Girl, a flash fiction by Scott Syx aka cheshirecatgrins, read by Russil Tamsen. 4:21 mins. Original text here. 

An unlikely romantic encounter between a pair of drinkers starts at a noisy night club. The two grapple cautiously on the perilous road to intimacy - their respective emotional baggages casting long shadows along the way...

This piece said noir to me (although updated). So I said noir back! 

All rights reserved. Russil Tamsen: narrator, comic improv actor, book editor, and author of 21 ebooks. Please visit my ebookstore at QuirkEbooks.com and follow audiobooknarrator. Know a piece of Tumblr fiction that deserves a great reader? Run it by me!

The Cleanup, excerpted from a novel by Ravi Kotecha, narrated by Russil Tamsen.  13 mins.  Written version here. A couple of young dudes from India - runaways from an earlier chapter - have inserted themselves into the business of smuggling guns and opium. They are now wandering around the rutted back tracks of Afghanistan, haggling and trying to spend as much of their arms trade money as possible buying up as much opium as their rickety vehicles can carry.  Wow, this was a vocal actor's challenge. Jumping between several Indian and Arabic voicings, phew!  I love picturing these exotic locales... And it's a nerve-wracking tale too: we're just waiting for the shoe to drop, for their hubris to catch up with them! That, however, would be part of a later chapter. I initially voiced the narrator as an Indian, but later decided to go with my regular voice. It's a tough call when the narrator is first person, but it seemed like too much Indian the other way. What do you think?

All rights reserved. Russil Tamsen: narrator, comic improv actor, book editor, and author of 21 ebooks. Please visit my ebookstore at QuirkEbooks.com and follow audiobooknarrator. Know a piece of Tumblr fiction that deserves a great reader? Run it by me!

The Cleanup, excerpted from a novel by Ravi Kotecha, narrated by Russil Tamsen.  13 mins.  Written version here. A couple of young dudes from India - runaways from an earlier chapter - have inserted themselves into the business of smuggling guns and opium. They are now wandering around the rutted back tracks of Afghanistan, haggling and trying to spend as much of their arms trade money as possible buying up as much opium as their rickety vehicles can carry.  Wow, this was a vocal actor’s challenge. Jumping between several Indian and Arabic voicings, phew!  I love picturing these exotic locales… And it’s a nerve-wracking tale too: we’re just waiting for the shoe to drop, for their hubris to catch up with them! That, however, would be part of a later chapter. I initially voiced the narrator as an Indian, but later decided to go with my regular voice. It’s a tough call when the narrator is first person, but it seemed like too much Indian the other way. What do you think?

All rights reserved. Russil Tamsen: narrator, comic improv actor, book editor, and author of 21 ebooks. Please visit my ebookstore at QuirkEbooks.com and follow audiobooknarrator. Know a piece of Tumblr fiction that deserves a great reader? Run it by me!

From cupcakesandcum on Tumblr comes this dirty, raw, disturbing, yet evocative sexual monologue. Performed by Russil Tamsen. 5 mins. Original text here.

The piece concerns the five first encounters in a temporary relationship. A ragged pair of stockings exemplifies the couple's disarray with terminal runs.   It was great to be allowed to experiment with this writing! In the audio I played with rhythm, adding in some character voices, and some out of control sound effects. I totally went for the humor too... All rights reserved. Russil Tamsen: narrator, comic improv actor, book editor, and author of 21 ebooks. Please visit my ebookstore at QuirkEbooks.com and follow audiobooknarrator. Know a piece of Tumblr fiction that deserves a great reader? Run it by me!

This is a panoramic shot of most of Dear Aunt Gertrude, my comedy improv troupe. I'm sporting the orange tie to the left, to the left.

The Future of Poop, comic monologue penned by Peter Bradley, performed by Russil Tamsen. Original here. 6 mins.

This was just too fucking funny for me to pass up! The conceit is simple: earthlings in the future invent time travel technology… and use it as a waste disposal chute. We in the past, specifically our bodies, are the hapless recipients of future waste. (It’s probably going to happen, too, right?) There’s only one way to solve this problem.

All rights reserved. Russil Tamsen: narrator, comic improv actor, book editor, and author of 21 ebooks. Please visit my ebookstore at QuirkEbooks.com and follow audiobooknarrator. Know a piece of Tumblr fiction that deserves a great reader? Run it by me!