I Wasn't Watching Episode's 8 And 9 While They Aired So I Watched It Together Before Season Finale. Did

Cold Feet (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

fluff. fluff. fluff

loosely based off an episode of how i met your mother bc i’ve binge watched it and its aMAZING 

this has female pronouns bc that’s how it worked out but pls bear in mind that most my work is gender neutral  

-Jazz

Prompt /song; none

Request; my own idea for once lol

Other characters featured; none 

KEY

Y/N - Your name

Y/L/N - Your Last Name

Warnings; language 

Word count; 847

felix is also a totally fictional guy that I just came up with 

–

(this gif actually kills me.)

You stood in front of the mirror, staring at your reflection. Your white dress seemed to be the most eye catching thing on you right now. Your hair was done beautifully, your eye makeup made you feel like a model and the huge diamond on your ring finger was almost show stopping.

You wanted to get married. You wanted to find someone to spend your life with and have that special connection that seems almost extinct. 

But like all weddings, there was one minor detail the bride didn’t like. Usually it was the colour of the details on the cake, or the font of the name cards on the tables. 

It was only the groom that you didn’t like. Nothing horribly major, right? 

‘Shit.’ You murmured. ‘Shitty, shittity shit!’

‘Y/N?’ Your best friend called from outside the bathroom. ‘Are you getting cold feet?’ 

‘Nope! I’m good. It’s perfect!’ You over-enthusiastically replied.

You would have been over the moon to have a wedding like this.

If you were marrying Bucky..

You’d broken up with him nine months previous. But, due to your work and who you hung out with, you saw him most days and had become really good friends, despite the fact you’d dated for a year and a half.

You’d still been crazily in love with him when Felix asked you out. And when he asked you to be his girlfriend. And finally, when he proposed. And when he asked you to move to London with him. But you were as stubborn as they came, and didn’t think of leaving London and leaving Felix for Bucky until - Well, until he’d confessed his love for you.

At six this morning, after he’d flown from Brooklyn, may I add.

Let’s rewind.

You’d gone for a walk to clear your head - You knew wedding jitters were normal, but these weren’t jitters. These were urges to pack your bags and fly the fuck back to New York. Back home, to where your best friends were.

Instead, you were in Chelsea, London. A place where the subway was called the ‘tubes’, a place where it rained far too much and a place where Bucky wasn’t. 

You clenched your fists and marched down the street, under the dim brightness of the fading out street lights, as the rain slashed again your hair, sending chills down your shaking body.

‘Y/N!’ A familiar voice yelled.

You were imagining it. It wasn’t him.

‘Y/N!’ 

You hadn’t slept very well. It was your imagination, you told yourself.

However, when a cold, metal hand grabbed yours and pulled you back, you gasped.

‘Bucky?’ You spluttered, staring at the guy in front of you. His brown hair was disheveled from running, he looked exhausted. He’d come all the way from Brooklyn. ‘What are you doing-’

‘I love you, Y/N. I can’t let you marry him. You just have to come home-’

You stared at him in disbelief. He’d got on a plane, at 1am in New York time, to fly to London, and tell you he loved you. But the wedding was planned, Felix would be waiting and everyone was expecting you to be at the aisle in three hours.

‘Buck.’ You murmured. ‘I can’t. This has been planned. I can’t leave. I’m sorry. I love Felix.’

You didn’t want him to look so heart broken. You had to resist the urge to kiss him, and tell him you would get on the next flight home. To arrive in Brooklyn and hug your friends, and to just spend time with Bucky. Because you loved him. So why didn’t you say so?

‘I get it.’ Bucky murmured. ‘It was a long shot. But, at least I have an answer, right? It’s better than not coming and living the rest of my life not knowing what you would have said-’

‘Please don’t speak like that.’ You muttered, your voice breaking. ‘I have to get back to get my hair done. The wedding is at nine am, and I’m kind of shitting myself.’ You tried to laugh.

‘Good luck, Y/N. Felix is a lucky guy.’

–

As it turns out, you will get some strange looks whilst walking through London Gatwick Airport in a huge wedding dress. And by some, I mean literally every person.

You didn’t remember much from the past hour. You had a brief memory of running, getting in a cab. The cab driver gave you a strange look, but you got to the airport with Felix’s stolen credit card. But you clearly remembered leaving your ring and a note behind.

‘Felix,

I can’t marry you. It wouldn’t be fair on you, or me. I can’t apologize, because I can’t be sorry for falling in love with someone  else when it’s not within my control. 

Good luck, 

Y/N.’

And now, you were dragging yourself through the airport, towards the flight desk. The the elderly hostess gave you an odd look, but then a sympathetic smile. ‘Can I help you, dear?’

‘Hi, yes. I’d like a standard ticket for the next flight that leaves for Brooklyn, please.’

–

part two?

‘

Awesome!

Is this anger?

Pairing: loki x reader Thor x reader (friend ship)

Author: me

Word count: 2818

Warnings: language,

Summary: Reader and Loki get into a fight when the reader gets into his cell. She ignores him for a few days until she has to leave and she goes to Loki to say good bye.

Requests: “Hey. Can you make a part 2 for “is this love?” where the reader can get into his cell and they can touch each other and hug and kiss. stuff like this. smut if you want, pleeeease”

“part two for ‘is this love?’ the reader and loki get into a fight and the reader leaves asgard and loki is all depressed? thank you!”

A/n: I didn’t do smut in this but in part 3 (if I make it) I will put smut. you can find part 1 HERE

**

it has been two days since that little incident and Odin still doesn’t like nor believe you. You still have visit’s with Loki and everytime he see’s that bruised up cheek of your he gets mad. really mad. like the hulk mad. You guys are always having normal conversations. That one time you started to talk with another prisoner and Loki got jealous so for the sake of his life you kind of stopped talking to him, and moved him down the hall just for safety reasons.

“I need to ask you something.” You said to Thor,

“Anything.” He said with a bright smile. You sighed, how were you going to say this?

“Do you think…you could..uh….,” Thor rolled his eyes in annoyance,

“Oh come on, y/n. Spit it out” He chuckled at you. You took a deep breath in,

“Do you think you can let me in Loki’s cell?”

Thor’s smile dropped, “why would you want that?” He asked confused. You grabbed Thor’s hand and pulled his to a chair so he could sit down,

“You said it yourself, Loki is in love with me and I him. He wouldn’t hurt me.” You looked in Thor’s eyes with a pleading look.

“I don’t know, y/n.” He paused, “He doesn’t have to hurt you to escape”

“Please?” He didn’t say anything, “you promised me a fun time here. Me seeing loki will be fun”

“You did see loki,” Thor said.

“You know what I mean,” you looked around to see of anyone else was coming, “I wanna do more than just see him, Thor”

“Ah, so this is about sex?” He said loudly. Very loudly.

“Thor keep it down!” You shouted, “if anyone heard you I would most likely be put in a cell just like Loki’s” you said in a whisper, “besides, I don’t wanna do the sex with him, I just wanna hug him or something. considering we both admitted that we love each other.”

“I’ll see what I can do,”

*

“Odin,” you bowed, over these weeks you decided to actually bow to the dick because you are trying to be on his good side he doesn’t send his men to kill you and then hide your body. can he do that?

“y/n,” Odin greeted you with a glare, “How nice to see you before you leave.”

“yeah, uh about that, I am here to ask if I can extend my stay here in Asgard.” you told him with your head low.

“No,”

“But sir-” you started but he cut you off,

“I am sorry but I do not trust you and when you ask for a-”

“Odin,” Came a scolding voice, Odin sighed, “Loki is in love with girl,” she said, “what do you think will happen when she leaves and doesn’t come back?”

“Frigga, please-” Frigga cut him off by looking towards you with a gentle smile,

“Your stay is extened to whatever date you please,” she walked up to you and you stood up to your feet. She took your hands in hers, “I have been dying to meet you” you smiled awkwardly, “please excuse my husband. he doesn’t trust anyone who has a conversation with my son”

“you’re Loki’s mother?” you asked in shock, “but I though he was a-”

“I may not be his biological mother but he grew up as my son and nothing will change that” her smile stayed on her face.

“Honestly, Loki never mentioned you,” you said with a real smile, “I like you”

“come,” she said. you followed her through the halls, “You and I are the only one who visit Loki and I thank you for that, If we weren’t to visit him he would go mad.” she chuckled.

“No offence but you are so nice and respectful, why are you with a man like Odin” you asked looking at Frigga.

“Odin is a man of cruelty and rudeness but he does love me in his way” she smiled,

you scoffed, “I wish he loved me” she stopped and looked at you,

“Excuse me?” she asked in shock,

“oh god!” you laughed “not like that, I mean respected me or-or you know just being a friend”

“ah,” she laughed, “You midgardians always please me”

“you should come down to earth, I can take you to go see a movie, have you ever saw a movie?” you asked her

“movie?” she asked furrowing her eye in confusion,

“yeah, uh moving pictures.” you smiled

“as interesting as it sounds I am Asgard’s queen and I cannot leave my home” she frowned, 

“Lady y/n!” you turned around and saw a guard running up to you

“I’m no lady.” you smirked 

“Thor has requested you company in the dungeons, he says it is about what you said earlier.” The guard said, “my queen” he greeted Frigga, 

“Go,” Frigga said, “Give my boy a hug for me,” she winked.

“How did you know?” you asked the queen.

“how else did you think Thor got permission to let you in the cell? he is powerful but not that powerful. If anything were to happen to you in that cell he would be sent in the cell next to loki,” she said, “but me however, Odin would not do tat to me.”

“Thank you” you said, grinning ear to ear.

*

“I will have these 4 guards standing outside of the door,” Thor pointed to the heavily armed guards, “and the prisoner’s were moved to the other dungeon so you guys have privacy, you only have 2 hours max, if Odin finds out that you were in the cell with Loki he won’t need evidence to back up his story either he will kill you or through you off of Asgard. quit literally, like into oblivious”

“okay,” you said with wide eyes

“I’m just kidding the worst he will do is just ban you from Asgard but then mother will let you back in, she is the queen after all” Thor smiled,

“You do realize that’s not funny right” you glared as Thor chuckled, “It’s kind of funny”

you sighed and walked into the dungeon, closing the door behind you, “Loki?” you called out as you skipped down the empty hall until you came face to face with the thick wall of glass, you held up the keys so Loki could see, “guess what I got Frigga to do for me?” you smirked.

“Y/n, you can’t come in here.” Loki said sternly

“and why’s that” you asked as you walked around the cell to the door,

“Y/n, please. If I even touch you I won’t resist myself” you laughed,”so, that is what this is about?” you asked as you unlocked the door, “the horny Loki is taking a peek?” 

“No, it’s not like that. It has been awhile since I killed someone” you stopped as your hand reached the door knob,

“Are you saying you are going to kill me?” you asked, “Loki, I know you are self conscious but that’s just sad.” you said as you opened the door. Loki didn’t move, he just stood there staring at you in shock, “so,” you whispered, “Are you going to kill me or are you going to kiss me?”

“oh hell,” Loki said to himself as he ran up to you, he grasped you head in his hands and crashed his lips to yours. The first thing you see is his bright green eyes before closing them.  Everything seemed to slow down like in a romantic movie you felt all you needed was the rain. Loki’s tongue skimmed you bottom lip, asking for entrance which you happily obliged. your tongues met together. he tastes of blueberries and strawberries. it was sweat.

Loki pushed you against the wall with force and you let out a moan as the hard surface hit your back. His hands wandered down before going to your breasts. Before you could muster up a moan he quickly pulled away, “I-I’m sorry y/n. That was very inappropriate” he apologized. turning around and taking a few steps to the other side of the cell.

“What are you saying sorry for loki?” you asked walking up behind him.

“why are we doing this?” he asked turning around to face you, “what we have sex then you leave Asgard and never come back? you get to tell all of your friends on how you slept with the great Loki of Asgard?” he asked rage filling his eyes, “huh?” he grabbed you shoulders and shook you.

“what?” you asked pushing him hands off of you, “No! why would I do that to you?” you asked with shock and sadness.

“Oh I don’t know, to see if the great loki has a heart?” he asked taking you words from a couple days ago, you stared at him, you were starting to get mad.

“Excuse me?” you asked  “You are the one who kissed me, mister!”

“Yeah and maybe I’m regretting it!” He shouted back.

“oh,” you said with a face smile, “Is this anger!”

“Yes this is fucking anger!” his eyes were filled with rage.

“Oh go eat a snickers!” you screamed in his face.

“Stop with your god damn references!” 

“Miss,” Came a voice by the door, “Are you alright?”

“I’M FINE!” you shouted while Loki screamed ‘SHE’S FINE’

The guard was quick to leave.

“MAYBE I WILL STOP WITH MY REFERENCES WHEN YOU STOP ACTING LIKE A BITCH!”

“HOW AM I ACTING LIKE A BITCH?” 

“Maybe it’s because you are always whining on ‘oh Odin hit you, that’s not fair” or “I wish I can get out of this god forsaken place and live like a king” you said in a whining little girl’s voice

“I DON’T SOUND LIKE THAT!”

“I HATE YOU!”

“I can’t believe I ever loved you!”

“Go try and destroy another planet!”

“Maybe I will!” he said walked towards you, you being as clumsy as you are, tripped over something and fell to the ground, hitting your head in the process. Luckily you you didn’t pass out. you stood up and touched your wound and bringing your hand back so you can see the blood.

“You dick!” you screamed, “you did this to me!” Loki’s eyes lost their anger and were now filled with sorrow and regret.

“y/n, I-I’m sorry,” he took a step towards you. You held up your hand to stop him,

“FUCK YOU!” you said before leaving the cell. You gared at loki before you closed and locked the door behind you.

“My lady,” the guard said running up to you, “are you alright?” he asked,

“do I look fucking alright?” you snapped and stomped away.

*

“I swear I am going to kill him!” Thor shouted as he walked back and forth.

“Thor,” you said as the doctor patted your wound with a napkin, “I told you this ten times,’ you paused as Thor stopped and looked at you, “Go do then! seriously, I hate the bastard! throw him off a fucking cliff!”

“Now, now,” Frigga said as she entered the room, “You and Loki just got into a fight, Odin and I get into fights every now and then but we always love each other in the end” she said softly 

“Well,” you began, “I don’t love the fucking god he can go suck a bag of di-”

“Y/n,” Thor said, “You are talking to the queen.”

you stopped, “I’m sorry. I am just really pissed off as you can see”

“I can see very well” Frigga smiled, “You must know that it was not all of Loki’s fault” she said.

“what” you scoffed, “Uh yeah it is, he was the one who-”

“y/n,” she said sternly, “I have had the same talk with Loki. I feel as if I am talking to kids!” she said loudly, it wasn’t a scream, “Now get your act together!” You and Thor froze. It was silent until Thor started to laugh,

“Work it, mother” he chuckled. Frigga nodded and left the room.

“Wow” you said in a whisper, “I guess she gets mad.”

“She is a mother, “ Thor smirked, “It’s her job”

*

It has been two days and you were planning on leaving today, you had to be back at work or else Nick Fury would chew your ass. You were happy to be leaving, you missed your home. All you wanted to do was cuddle with your phone and watch netflix.

you stuffed your last bit of clothing in your bag and sighed, “How the hell am I going to close you?” you asked yourself.

“try sitting on it” Thor’s voice said behind you, you shrugged,

“That may work”

“Are you going to say bye to my brother?” Thor asked coming up next to you,

“I don’t know,” you sighed, “I don’t think he wants to see me”

“Believe me when i say this, he does” he smiled, “he hasn’t been eating for the past couple days and he started to read alice in wonderland again”

“Good, “ you huffed, “I hope he starves to death”

“you don’t mean that” Thor said,

you sat down on your bed, “I don’t”

“Go see him, “Thor suggested, “I will finish your packing” 

“Alright”

*

“why so glum?” you asked loki as you walked in front of his cell. His head is in his hands as he sat on the side of his bed. There was food beside his bed on a small table that wasn’t touched. Beside that was ‘alice in wonderland’ opened and sitting face forward.

He looks up at you with a smile, “Y/n.”

“I heard you weren’t eating” you said with a straight face.

“oh uh,” He looked at his food, “I wasn’t hunger”

“for two days?” you asked with a small smirk on your face. Loki looked at you with tears in his eyes,

“I’m so sorry I did what I did to you the other day. It was foolish and selfish-”

“You were the one foolish?” you asked with a chuckle, “I told you to go eat a snickers” Loki laughed along with you. you stopped laughing and sighed, “Listen, I’m leaving today and I thought, well Thor thought that I should come and say bye”

“Come in here and give me a proper goodbye, then” Loki said with a small smile,

“I think we both know that’s a bad idea” you said with your hands i your pockets.

“Don’t go” He whispered,

“I have to,” You said tying not to let the tears come, “I have a job, a life”

“You can get a job here, “ Loki said tears streaming down his face, “You could live here too, mother already likes you and well you’ll grow on Odin”

“I can’t. You know why Loki. I can’t just drop everything and stay here in Asgard. I have friends there family. And I know if I do stay here Steve and Tony will hunt me down and drag me back” you laughed.

“Those god forsaken avengers are always winning” Loki growled under his breath but you heard.

“Loki, please. let’s not fight” you said closing your eyes,

“Then don’t leave!” Loki begged you, “please! I love you! You can’t leave!”

“I’m sorry! but I have to” you said, tears now streaming down your face to, “Good bye loki” you said softly.

“No! No! No! Please” Loki cried, “DON’T GO!”

You kept walking, ignoring his cries and left the dungeon with your heart broken.

*

“Here we are,” Thor smiled as he dropped your bags on your couch, “Home sweet uh….Home” he slowed down as he saw your dog run up to you, “How do you live with that vial creature?” he asked you as you laughed when your dog kissed your ear.

“It’s called a pet,” You said smiling, ‘You should get one”

“uh, no” Thor said, “I got to go. Father doesn’t like it much that I’m aloe with you,” he laughed as you quickly gave him a hug.

“I’m going t miss you” Thor said hugging you back. 

“Me too” you let go of Thor and he left.

“Just me and you now” you said to your dog, you noticed something in the corner of your eye. ou turned around and saw ‘alice in wonderland’ on your coffee table beside your couch, Thor must have left it for you.

You picked it up and a piece of paper fell from it, Slowly you picked it up and unfolded it.

It read,

I figured you would want this back - L

p.s: I love you.

******

And I’m done!

What the hell is even going on this week…?

Star Wars fans are up in arms about the… well, questionable decisions made in Rise Of Skywalker. It did, however, have the strange and almost unprecidented effect of uniting shippers and antis against a common enemy (JJ).

The film adaptation of Cats was not so divisive… but holy cow… what the… I mean… what.

Misha Collins had hip replacement surgery for dysplasia.

J.K. Rowling messed up big time, causing thousands of people to claim that Hatsune Miku is the actual author of the Harry Potter series.

The conservative-heavy U.K. Parliament backed a deal for Brexit to go through at the end of January.

An asteroid three times as tall as the Great Pyramid of Giza just scraped by our planet.

Donald Trump was impeached. Only he wasn't? Or he was, but might not be? Or he is and probably won't be removed from office? Or he will be removed from office and we'll end up with Pence as president instead? Or Pence won't become president, because Trump's entire cabinet goes with him? What is going on?

In other "presidential" news, after Greta Thunberg was named Time Magazine's Person Of The Year, Trump's 2020 campaign Twitter account posted a picture of the magazine cover with Trump's face pasted over Greta's.

There was a reported Wawa data breach that exposed customer credit / debit card numbers, expiration dates, and cardholder names at potentially all their store gas pumps and registers.

The private information of over 267 million Facebook users was reportedly exposed online.

India is in turmoil over a controversial citizenship law.

But also…

The Democratic debate was a mostly-civil affair.

Germany banned "conversion therapy" for minors.

The FDA has issued approval for an ebola vaccine.

Scientists in Brazil have successfully 3-D bio-printed a functioning human mini-liver.

Sebastian Stan modeled for Men's Health Magazine (and the internet melted).

It was discovered that the US government has listed the fictional nation of Wakanda as a trade partner.

NASA has confirmed the existence of a new class of planets called "super-puffs," which have the density of cotton candy.

Virginia biochemist, Camille Schrier, was crowned Miss America after putting on a lab coat and giving "a colorful chemistry demonstration of the catalytic decomposition of hydrogen peroxide" onstage.

…

I mean, what is going on here? It's like 2019 forgot to do a bunch of stuff, so now it's piling it all up at the end and shoving it at 2020 like

Promise | Father!Bucky Barnes

Father!Bucky Barnes x Mother!Reader

Words: 1,089

You ran and ran, trying to gain as much speed as you could but it never seemed enough. They were too far off, their figures just blurry masses all-too-quickly mixing. You had to get to them, you needed to get to them, but…. “Bucky! (S/N)!” You called out, hoping your husband would turn around, or just stop. He had to stop, he had to! You tried to speed up your running but your legs were tiring, muscles screaming to stop yourself but you wouldn’t. You needed to get to them. Please! Bucky! (S/N)! Please… Their figures, already just black, blurry masses against the bright background, slowly disappeared before they were gone completely-…

Keep reading

Tom Hiddleston presents the award for Leading Actress at the BAFTA TV Awards 2016

A fallen merman taking his last breaths, for some, the stuff of nightmares, for others, the stuff of dreams. Hauntingly beautiful scupture ‘And then I saw Colby on the Street and my fantasy died’ by  Cameron Stalheim.

Definitely the stuff of dreams for me. And I know who I’ll be dreaming of…

Come back soon *Bucky Barnes x Reader*

Requested by @that-awkward-blonde-chick-xo : Your fanfics are on fleek❤️ could you write one were the prompt is: “I looked out the window and sighed, was he ever gonna get back?” And have it be a Bucky x Reader?? Warnings: Swearing, minor angst and fluff Admins Note: STEPHANIE YOU SWINE, enjoy this. – Ro (Low Key changed the prompt slightly to fit my writing style better, love you Natasha – Kik Nat, you beautiful human)

Inspired by the Bucky edition of In My Time of Dying & A Red Rose

1940’s

“WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN YOU SIGNED?” You yelled, frowning deeply at your boyfriend of almost two years, his grin turning into a frown; if you weren’t so mad you’d comment on how great he looked in a uniform but you were angry, no, terrified for his life. You knew this day would come, you hoped the war would have been over before this happened, it wasn’t over and now he had sighed. You sighed gently, tears forming in your eyes at the thought of him not coming back to you, you couldn’t even look at him because you were so mad; he pulled the hat off and placed it on the table before walking to you, you stepped back just as fast and h frowned ever more “I need a few minutes, James” you tell him and leave the dining room.

“(Y/N)?” he knocked on the bedroom door gently, you look up, he sighs as he sees your eyes red and puffy, from crying no doubt “Doll, c’mere” you refuse and he walks to you and kneels down in front of you and lifts your chin with a finger so you have no choice but to look into his blue eyes, he has a gentle smile, almost affectionate. “I’ll come back, always.” You nod and let out a sigh, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand and sniffing, fresh tears on the brink of the dam and Bucky pulls you to him for a hug, resting his face in the crook of your neck; he’d never admit how scared he is to leave, terrified like you, he doesn’t want to leave you or home. He wants to stay here, where he can protect and love you, also Steve but he had to remain strong for you and himself.

“Just…” you trail and he pulls back “come back soon?” you asked and he nodded, running a hand through your (H/C) hair, he was going to miss this; the feel of you, your smile and smell, he pulled you to him and kissed you gently. It was almost as if his lips weren’t even on yours with how gentle he was, it was filled with all the words he needed but couldn’t say to you, plus a promise of return and a hint of hope but it also told you that he was afraid… like you but that no matter what he’d be home, he’d come home, soon.

 **

Brooklyn felt cold and empty without him, it felt dark and silent, everything a home shouldn’t be. It was worse with the fact Steve had ran off to join the army too, resulting in him becoming Captain America, at least they were together but it didn’t help ease your worrying and aching heart for Bucky, and Steve. Brooklyn didn’t feel like home, Bucky took that feeling with him, you knew it wouldn’t be the same without him but a part of you felt as though you could carry on; impossible, Bucky had been a part of your life for two years, wiggling his way into every nook and crevice of your life.

You sighed as you ate dinner at a diner with your friend, her guy s returned on medical leave, as much as you wanted to be happy for them… you were envious; he lost a leg but still, here they were both sat shaking a milkshake as you enviously stared at them, remembering the double dates Bucky dragged you on for Steve and his other couple friends. You told him to return in one piece but the longer you went without him the more you considered not caring about a loss of a limb.

You looked out the diner window and sighed, was he ever gonna get back? What if he is one of the unlucky ones that don’t return, how could you possibly move on from him? You wouldn’t even think about it, he promised, he said he’d come back soon and you were holding him to that. He promised you a forever, so, you’d believe him.

Present Time

Bucky stands over you, it’s silent as he tries to find the right words for you, he didn’t know how to apologise or even begin to word his emotions because it’s been so long, too long. The air is cold and tense, Bucky frowned as he tried to form some kind of sentence, some string of words that will tell you how sorry he is, how much he loves you but nothing sprang to mind and Bucky just remained standing… in silence.

He sighs gently “I don’t know what to say” he mumbled into the air “I don’t – I can’t begin to explain all of what happened, what kept me from returning to you, what made me so late for… this” his voice was quiet, soft and low, almost unheard unless you were standing next to him and he becomes silent again “I don’t know what to do, I’m so lost, (Y/N)” he sighed and let his head drop, staring at his shoes and he wipes his eyes but the tears form quickly after “I messed up the day I signed, I messed up, the day I put that uniform on was the day you lost me” he cries silently to himself, he thought he was stronger than this, he thought he could be stronger for you.

He’s silent as he tries to figure out what more is there is to say, he can’t think properly as the silence consumes him, he looks at you for a long moment and his heart aches because the picture is wrong. He was too late, gone for too long and missed you by a few years, even though he was alive but you missed him a chance to one last time see his face. He stares at the gravestone in front of him, your name clearly etched into it, he sighs gently knowing this is all in vain; you can’t hear him or feel him here but in this moment he likes to pretend you do. That you’re standing beside him, holding his hand and smiling up at him, that after a while you’ll tug on his hand and pull him away leading him to wherever because he was always chasing after you.

“I should get going” he sighed out, smoothing the stone with his human hand, running his fingertips gently over the smoothness of it and its cold. He remembers you were always cold, always staying close to him because he was warm, he remembers the obvious things but he has forgotten the feel of you and the smell. He can’t remember the perfume you used to wear, Natasha has spent hours spraying old perfumes to help him remember, nothing stands out in his mind and he doesn’t think he’ll ever get the exact smell because it was mixed with… you. He can’t remember the exact colour of your eyes, photos never have done your eyes justice, they were beautiful and captivating but he can’t remember them.

“I don’t know when I’ll come back” he admits “seeing you… without actually seeing you, it’s difficult, I can’t – it hurts that I let you down and left you alone” he sniffs and pulls his hand away “but I’ll come back soon, I promise, I won’t let you down ever again” he steps back and walks down the path, it won’t ever get easier for him.

(Hope you liked this, took some time to actually get right, fortunately, I got inspiration from past stuff I’ve written. Remember you can request; imagines, headcanons and one shots by myself and Angie. Yo! We take smut requests also, so, send those in - Rosalee)

“Oh, don’t be a bitch.” (requested by anon)

I need new blogs to follow

Guys please if you post any of the following, let me know! I will follow everyone who likes/reblogs this.

panic! at the disco

twenty one pilots

shadowhunters

sherlock

doctor who

reign

how i met your mother

modern family

friends

basically if you blog any great tv shows i will follow you

MARVEL

i mean seriously if you post marvel stuff i will totally follow you

follow backs would be very appreciated but not necessary

*rolls out of bed* 

*catches up on missed Setlock yesterday*

*sees Setlock from today*

*crawls back into bed*

*pulls covers over head*