Anemone0703 - Cupidx

my brain whenever there’s a minor inconvenience

Thirteen

The colouring in this movie > everything

wire wrapped rings by peechmart

Self harm doesn’t always happen when a blade touches skin.

It’s skipping meals because you don’t feel like you deserve to eat today. It’s having sex because you want to be used or abused or defiled. It’s drinking recklessly because you might have the ‘courage’ do something stupid. It’s smoking - not because you need the nicotine - because you know it’s bad for you. It’s banging your head against a wall when you’re angry. It’s crossing the road without looking because you lowkey hope a car might hit you. It’s thinking about all the ways you could break a bone and make it look like an accident. It’s not taking painkillers because you want to suffer. It’s taking painkillers in excess because you know it’s dangerous. It’s walking home the more dangerous way because you’re kind of half hoping you’ll get attacked or raped or stabbed. It’s going for long walks at night and getting chilled to the bone and hoping that you get lost so that you can’t find your way back. It’s seeking out triggering material. It’s all the stupid little ways you punish yourself for existing.

Sometimes self harm happens when you put effort into depriving yourself of things you like or need, and sometimes it happens when you don’t put any effort into doing the things you like or need.

It’s a pattern of self-destructive behaviour, and it doesn’t only happen in one way.

This sort of behavior is classified as “para-suicidal” It’s putting yourself in a situation of danger or destruction with the intention of risking your safety rather than a direct attempt on your life. Kind of, leaving it all to chance? Also doing things to harm yourself or your self worth because you feel you deserve to feel the outcome of those actions.

painting: skull of a skeleton with burning cigarette by vincent van gogh

Vivienne Westwood safety pin earrings

Some quick selfies of today

This is probably completely wrong but I did a lil digging and for the two workouts I’m doing this is how many calories they burn

waist workout

50 jumping jacks - 20 cal.

30 crunches - 5 cal.

50 Russian twists 10 cal.

30 push ups - 6 cal.

40 mountain climbers - 7 cal.

20 toe touches - 3 cal.

50 bridges - 8 cal.

30 bicycle crunches - 5 cal.

50 jumping jacks - 20 cal.

1 minute plank - 4 cal.

Total: 93 cal.

thigh gap workout

1 min wall sit - 16 cal.

60 jumping jack - 23 cal.

60 toe touches - 9 cal.

40 lunges 12 cal.

30 squats - 9.6 cal.

20 jumping jack - 4 cal.

10 toes touches - 1.5 cal.

1 min wall sit - 16 cal.

Total: 91.1 cal.

Grand Total: 184 cal.

doesn’t seem like a lot :/ then again I’m not willing to go on runs XD fuck that and i working on specific parts of myself idk lul

I really need an Evie to my Tracy, will you be Evie? 🎬★