⚠️ Important News! ⚠️

do you guys also ruin every good thing in your life or is that just me

why must i be so hard to be around?

all i do is yearn and be sleepy

anyone wanna take me out back and shoot me like an old dog

does anybody know what’s wrong with me

"Ok, ma'am that'll be $226.03."

I take my wallet out of my pocket and unfold it. It is empty other than a single moth that lazily flies out. The moth lands on the tap point of the card reader. There's a beat, and my payment is processed. The moth flies back into my wallet and I put it back in my pocket.

ten minutes in bus stop time is equivalent to about 45 minutes in normal time

*my hands are braced against the side of a building as I'm getting patted down by cops* Oh that? That's my pocket paprika. For my emergency hard-boiled egg. You know, an emergency hard-boiled egg? It's like Paddington's marmalade sandwich except it's an egg. It's in the other pock--yeah, there it is.