GET KOSA TRENDING.

Damn, you got me. Gonna blow myself up with kerosine.

What do Italian ghosts eat?

Spooketi Boolognese!

Hi, Tumblr staff here to bring you...

Sex Drape!

The super tight, super strict, super unnecessary policy to block all NSFW and some other things we hate!

It'll drape over any sexual content and hide it, and we use it for many things that don't even look sexy!

Uh-oh! Are those nipples?

Cover them up with Sex Drape!

Two same sex people loving each other?

Who wants that? Fix it with Sex Drape!

And to show you the power of Sex Drape...

I cut the Tumblr community in half!

And I deleted one side with only Sex Drape!

Imagine everything you can flag and delete with the power of Sex Drape!

Note: Sex Drape does not work on Neo-Nazis, actual porn, or anything that is actually toxic. It does, however, work on LGBTQ+, skin, nonsexual love, and quite literally nothing that we should be giving a damn about. To order, call 1-800-531-8008.

If someone is having trouble with their phone's text-to-speech, their phone will always catch my voice perfectly!

i wonder if magic is real, but only in a really mundane way.

when i was little i could almost inerringly switch back to disney channel right as the ads ended when i was channel surfing.

maybe youve never accidentally crushed a ladybug underfoot. maybe your microwave popcorn never burns. maybe you can spin around lots and lots of times before you get dizzy.

is that magic??

honestly im not sure if these are magic or just small, invisible skills. im not sure which i like better.

Ouma: You two give each other cutesie nicknames?

Harukawa: No! Momota and I are not that close!

Ouma: Really? Well...what's glucose?

Harukawa: Sugar?

Momota: *three rooms away* Maki Roll, you called?

Ouma:

Harukawa:

Ouma:

Harukawa:

Ouma: Nishishi~

Harukawa: I CAN EXPLAIN-

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

my nam is cow

and wen with dog

i giv him sekret

dialog

of things tat onliy

he shud heer

i get up clos

i lik his eer

I autismed too hard and connected the dots on my favorite video game AIs that sing a credits song

[Image ID under Read More]

[ID: A Venn diagram made out of four ovals, each labeled with a letter and an image of a video game character -- in particular, a character presented as an artificial intelligence. Each overlap with these sections has a heading containing said letters in bold, followed by a description. These four sections are:

G - GLaDOS, from Portal

K - Kinito, from KinitoPET

M - Monika, from Doki Doki Literature Club!

R - Rambley, from Indigo Park

Sorted alphabetically and by number of overlaps:

GK - is mentioned in some scientist's all-caps warning about their deceit; was the last-ditch effort to give a failing company new direction

GM - is presumed dead at the proper end of the game, killed by the player destroying their necessary components, until they're woken back up by someone who regains their powers for the player's sake

GR - harbors a grudge against someone that was once leading the facility they run, although it turns out they don't know all the secrets below the surface of said facility until the player goes looking

KM - alters files on the player's computer via admin permissions, then gets killed the same way; hangs one of their friends; jumpscares the player if they notice recording software

KR - was explicitly made to be a user companion and makes that their mission as they try to cater an amusement park to the player's preference; their friends have nightmare versions that briefly chase you for one scene

MR - expresses that they haven't had a strong, close connection with anyone in so long until the player came despite the presence of their "friends"

GKM - wholly in control of the area they inhabit with minimal human input, if any

GKR - highly devoted to their respective jobs with as little deviation from the set plan as possible

GMR - tied in some way to scientists that want to conduct some unethical biological experiments that seemingly become bloodthirsty

KMR - openly sings about how the player was a net positive in their lives, albeit for a small bit of time

GKMR - A.I. that initially appears as helpful and/or friendly and latches onto the first human they see in a while; gets in over their head with the amount of power or lack thereof they have and strings the player along to serve their ulterior motives by deviating from their initial programming to do things with which they aren't authorized; comes clean after enough people die and presents a scenario where the player will be stuck with them indefinitely until one of them dies or fulfills the main goal; sings a song in the credits where they unload their feelings about the player

End ID.]

Farewell online privacy

PROOF IN CASE YOU NEED IT