Doodle I Did For My Friend. Father Forgive Me, I Have Given A Twink A Fat Ass.

Mobei Jun picking up slang from Shen Qingqiu and Shang Qinghua and using it like only the most jaded demon dad to ever demon.

Like bro thinks these words have wildly different meanings than they actually do.Shang Qinghua managed to assassinate another minor demon king, and Mobei Jun patted him on the head and told him he did a very pussyslay job. Shen Qingqiu was having a stressful time running his peak and Mobei Jun told him he was an aesthetic girlboss mood. Both of his wives live in fear of him trying to call them fam in bed meanwhile Mobei Jun thinks he's mastered their dialect and gotten an excellent grade in Husband.

podfic #37 [ ⛔ ]

A Very Special Collaboration With @xxmiserysmilesxx

ao3! [podfic] You are what you eat by deliciousblizzardshark alternate: archive.org media player time commitment: about 41 mins fic details:

You are what you eat (17669 words, chapters: 9/9) by deliciousblizzardshark @deliciousblizzardshark

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Eldritch Wei Ying | Wei Wuxian, Horny Lan Zhan | Lan Wangji, Body Horror, Possession, of a sort, Cannibalism, Kind Of, Mild Gore, Teeth, When the eldritch abomination possessing you is less of a pining idiot than you are, I did not expect there to be so much fluff when I started writing a fic about an eldrich horror, Fluff and Humor, Smut, Lan Zhan is so fucking thirsty, Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Monster sex, Switching, Light BDSM, Rimming, I guess when you write smut you end up with all these sex tags, Self-Lubrication, Seriousness treated Crackily, Implied/Referenced Torture, Dead Wei Ying | Wei Wuxian, Podfic Available

Summary:

“What happened to you?” Jiang Cheng demands.

Wei Wuxian sighs. “I already said I don’t know. This conversation is so boring,” he says. “I’m hungry. Can’t we get some food? They’re all too dead,” he adds, flicking a hand at the dead Wen guards, “to be tasty.”

and

Then there’s a sound like someone hacking something up and Wei Ying comes back into the room and, with a very proud expression drops a handful of teeth on the map table. Human teeth. They’re bloody and… wet…

“What?” Jiang Cheng asks. “What’s this?”

“Wen Chao’s teeth!” Wei Ying says proudly.

and

Lan Wangji wants to hold him tight in his arms and cry. He wants to eat him out. He wants to perform an exorcism.

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OMG THIS IS THE PERFECT GIF FOR WWX IN CH1 !!!

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SOMFT LAN WANGJI (microexpression KING wang yibo)

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LWJ! WE SEE YOU GIVING HIM THE ELEVATOR EYES

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BONUS MATERIALS

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end post

okay but i very much doubt shang qinghua will ever come to terms with having one bf who has tits bigger than his entire upper body and one bf whose waist is so petite he can circle it with his hands.

shang qinghua, after writing two extremely objectifiable men and marrying both: i’m a fucking genius shen qingqiu: is that all i am to you?? some horny fantasy?? shang qinghua: YOU READ THE WEBNOVEL YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT.

Shang Qinghua fell first, Mobei Jun fell harder, Shen Qingqiu quite literally fell from a tree and landed on top of them and he’s kinda just stuck around since

— the MoShenShang gospel or smth idk I’m not a historian

CONCEPT: drunk Shang Qinghua mentioning that with his massive tits, Mobei Jun would look fucking hot in a corset, and so Shen Qingqiu, former cosplayer, whips out his sewing skills and makes a fancy blue corset for Mobei Jun and Shang Qinghua just passes away from being a flustered gay little hamster

Shang Qinghua: wait… how did you know how to make a corset so fast?? Shen Qingqiu: well. sometimes with my old cosplays…. Shang Qinghua, ready to die for a second time: oh my god. Shen Qingqiu: look, i just had a thin waist okay? it worked with my body type! Shang Qinghua: OH MY GOD.

I'm in Chapter 4 of Volume 1 (so no spoilers please) but I feel like whatever is gonna happen wouldn't have happened or happened as badly with some meds.

ah yes, mobei “black coffee.” jun, and his wives, shen “venti iced cappuccino with soy milk two pumps vanilla and no cream” qingqiu, and shang “do you have any apple juice” qinghua.

SangCheng <3

It's a little crazy for me to think I haven't posted any mdzs stuff on here, considering that's all I used to draw on every other platform.

Local trans girl SQQ and her dumb fucking hamster bf