ˊ˗ ꒰🐚꒱ Good Morning, Sunshine

Damn same

me too Smoliv

141 men finding out military!reader is only 19 after they break down from being overwhelmed and overworked??

✎ this idea bounces around my head a lot actually and now i have a reason to write it down finally :) i wasn't sure if you wanted them altogether or separately so i did it separately because it's easier lol. i kept it platonic and sfw!

✎ tags : gender neutral!reader, reader has a panic attack, descriptions of violence/injury/death, swearing, hurt to comfort, all platonic relationships, only half proofread

you're barging into the safehouse where he had said to rendezvous, gasping for air that your closed throat won't let through. the rifle held in your dominant hand is dropped as soon as the door is shut behind you, and you're clawing at the straps of your helmet and chest armor to get them off because it's too tight and it's too much and you can't breathe.

this wasn't your first mission. it wasn't even the bloodiest one you'd been on thus far. you could handle the gore and the death and the pure misery of the victims of these situations, because at the end of the day, you were helping them, right?

unless you were too late.

the family had been huddled in a corner, two children laying underneath their parents. there had still been two other rooms to check in the house, but you were running out on shaky legs.

he's in front of you now, looking down at you and asking if you're injured. you're sitting on the floor, heaving for breath and tears pouring from your glassy eyes.

"it's not- it's not fucking fair!" you cried out finally, trying desperately to wipe your face dry on your sleeves, but it only worked to redden your skin further. "why are these people doing this? how could someone be so cruel?"

he sighed softly, not knowing how to respond. the team didn't show emotions like this, they didn't deal with them, not like this. but they had all been here, where you are now. they had all asked why, again and again and again until the word lost all meaning.

"i mean, are we even really helping? god, these people are all already dead! why are we here? why- jesus fucking christ, why am i here?" you rambled; you weren't talking to him anymore. your voice was fizzling out, getting quiet enough that he had to lean closer to hear your unsteady words.

"i can't help these people," you sobbed. "i'm just a kid, i'm only nineteen, i can't- i don't know what i'm supposed to do! they said i was special! they told me- said i was so much better and smarter than everyone else, what a fucking joke!"

☆ simon "ghost" riley

he knew you were young, but fuck, if that didn't break his heart, there was nothing left that would. simon didn't talk to you more than any of the others on the team, but you were special, like a little sibling to the team, to him. always having enough energy and kindness to make up for the rest of them.

seeing you like this was a first, even for him, the man who had seen the worst of the worst. it wasn't like he was immune to emotions, but he had spent so long pressing them all down until he couldn't feel them that this was new to him again. all he could do was offer a hand on your knee that he hoped resembled something like comfort.

"we're almost done here. the heli will come for us soon," he said quietly. "you did good, like always."

he watched and waited with you while your sobs whittled away to sniffles, never moving his hand from your knee, where you had grabbed onto it with one of your own. most people knew not to touch him, that they'd end up with one less hand if they did, but you were an exception.

☆ john "soap" mactavish

at first, he doesn't do anything, just kneels in front of you and stares in shock. you're nineteen? you had always danced around the question that the team would tease you with, asking if you still had to work on your homework, but it was always a joke. now it wasn't.

instead of dwelling, john shifts and sits in front of you, almost hovering over you awkwardly as he tried to figure out what to do. sure, he was one of the more open people on the team, but when you're standing next to ghost, just smiling makes you look emotionally vulnerable.

he takes your hands away from your face and into his, placing them on your lap before gently holding your shoulders. "look, we're almost done here, alright? we'll be far away before you know it." that didn't help much, so he paused again.

the almost-distraught look on his face forced a giggle out of you. his worry turned to confusion, why are you laughing now? you probably shouldn't have been, but the big, scottish military-man fretting over you was kind of funny.

"alrigh', lass, at least something cheered ya up," he grumbled, but turned serious again right after. "higher-ups were right, ya know. you are smarter than the rest of 'em. maybe even smarter than us, yeah?" he said with a smile.

☆ kyle "gaz" garrick

it wasn't that long ago that kyle was where you are now, fresh out of school and eager to prove himself in the military. except it had taken him several years longer than you to reach where you both were now; he had had plenty of time to come to terms with the horrors he saw.

now he realized that you hadn't, because you were smart and you were better than most other people, so they had thrown you in, like a minnow in a piranha pond. by all means, you were doing wonderfully for your circumstances, but you could only keep going for so long.

he sat down beside you, shoulder-to-shoulder, and wrapped an arm around you to bring your head down to rest on him. he sat with you quietly, giving you the time you needed to just get it all out.

eventually, once you're more calm, he breaks the silence with bad jokes that he definitely stole from simon.

"why do twitter users make bad soldiers?" you lifted your head to stare at him incredulously before he continued, "because, they're too quick to retweet."

☆ john price

the captain knew how young you were. he never told you, but he hadn't wanted you on the team at first; the second he was handed your file and saw your birthdate, he started protesting. but it wasn't up to him this time. he couldn't spare you from this, and he knew that it would always weigh on him. he knew he would always remember this, you, crumbling in on yourself in a heap on the floor.

john came down on one knee in front of you and started telling you a story about when he had started, how one of his first missions had gone so terribly wrong. you honestly thought he was just going to tell you to "suck it up" until he told you about one family he had saved during that mission, one that was still alive today. they still sent him letters, even.

"all you need is one good save, kid. and you've got dozens already," he murmured. he wouldn't say it outright, but you really were one of his best.

you remembered the child clinging to your back as you ran out of a collapsing building, the woman who's leg you had managed to get unstuck from fallen debris, the man you had stopped from being executed just in time.

price smiled once he saw he had gotten through to you and helped, at least a little, and roughly patted your shoulder. "evac will be here soon, chin up now."

reblog if you’re a safe place for:

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Reverse Streamer AU

ーOur favorite characters are streamers who play the game Genshin Impact and somehow fall in love with a particular character, you.

ーChilde x gender neutral reader

ーHeadcannons, Fluff

ーWarning: Childe content, cursing, usage of childe's real name

ーNote: AS USUAL @alberivh HELPED ME WITH EVERYTHING AND ALMOST HALF OF THIS ARE THEIR IDEAS TOO CHECK EM OUT

ーChilde

•Ah yes, Ajax (derogatory)

•His streamer name would be "Tartaglia"! He doesn't exactly remember where the name came from but it stuck and he doesn't really want to change it

•He's one of those people who everyone loves but makes fun of. #tartagliaslander is a commonly seen popular hashtag that comes up even few days

•Often is seen playing PvP games and is known for his fluid emotional state while playing games aka they love seeing his expressions and reactions because he's very.. expressive

•One time, they somehow convinced him to play a horror game and they were rewarded with comedy gold

•"HOLY FUCK *voice crack*"

•"NONONONONO WHY THE FUCK *voice crack* IS HER HEAD BACKWARDSー"

•"*insert high pitched scream* oh wait nevermind I thought it was Scaramouche"

•ehem, I shall skip over those details

•He ended up discovering genshin impact after someone in his stream compared him to a certain character

•"Oh really? I bet my mora that I'm better than this character you're talking about"

•He honestly speedruns the start of the game, he's really good at adapting to new games and learn how to play them

•And now! The moment he's been waiting for, he's finally in Liyue and he shall finally see for himself the person everyone has been talking aboutー

•"Hey sweety, hold still"

•Oh dear Ajax, you don't have a thought behind those eyes do you?

•His audience could practically see the gears turning in his head while he's watching you fight. He's usually very expressive but his face was all blank until the cut scene ended

•"...you guys win the betー" and it all went downhill from there

•Practically BEGS mihoyo for your banner daily after getting a few minutes of screen time of you

•"@Mihoyo when are we getting [name]'s banner" His wish gets granted.. a few months later

•“The unlucky whaler! Ajax” #PROUD

•He's one of those people who you can't help but wonder just how much money he has because he's always spending it for you almost like an investmentー

•Of course, there is a bad side. He has shit luck, he could spend a bunch of money for a character but lose the 50/50 to someone else. Though his bad luck only applies to characters, he had really good luck regarding artifacts

•He's unintentionally really good at building characters! He could casually just do 200k damage while putting random artifacts on a character

•But when it comes to you? Oh boy. 

•He has like 15 different tabs with many different builds regarding you comparing each and every one of them to see which one is the best because only the best for you my dear <3

•He's one of those players who have a slightly inappropriate signature

•"Twerks sadly in no c6 [name]"

•Probably steals resources from friends and only asks to get some after he's already taken them. He and Kaeya have a mutual agreement to take each other's resources without telling each other.

•“Kaeya can i get a—“ “Starconch? Sure”

•Giggles innocently after spending 3 weeks to save up all of your materials aka stealing his friend's resources

•He simped for your hand in your trailer next question. Him talking about how beautiful your hands would be if you had a ring thereー

•Him absolutely losing it in that one scene where u destroyed a bunch of ruin guards in like a few seconds 

•Everyone just sees him cover his mouth and he slowly sinks into his chair. He's usually very vocal when it comes to showing how down bad he is but he just gotta catch his breath for a second, somebody give him a cold glass of waterー

•Him reacting to your foul legacy form LIKE IT WAS A LIFE CHANGING EXPERIENCE

•"Oh fuck they could step on me, I mean they could step on me, oh wait no I mean they could step on meー"

•“oh my god…THEY LOOK HOTTER THAN BEFORE??? MOM THIS IS YOUR FUTURE KID IN LAW, DO YOU LIKE THEM????”

•He let out the highest, loudest, girliest scream when you finally came home, it doesn't matter if he lost the 50/50 like 5 different times, it was worth itー

•He literally got u at lvl 90 and 4.8k damage after a few mins of getting you and crowned you twice

•HE HAS YOUR NAME CARD AS SOON AS POSSIBLE AND EVERYTHING THAT WAS RELATED TO YOU

•Another one who collects all your ascension materials even thought he doesn't need them anymore

•“Guys…I can’t do this, /pulls for c6 [name]/“

•*Gets random other five star /slams head on desk/*

•“Mihoyo fuck you /pulls again/“

•/gets your weapon/ "I WANT THE CHARACTER NOT THE WEAPON"

•Then he goes to absolutely destroy the abyss with you

•Cries over your lore and then he goes like “YEAH LET'S THE ABYSS TOGETHER!”

•Probably named himself "Sweetheart" so that you would call him sweetheart in the game

•Childe would be this one dude who babysits Teucer and streams at the same time. So technically….he’s fighting over you while feeding teucer his food

•He's basically hypnotized teucer into loving you

•“do you like [name]”

•“Say yes or i’ll tell mom we’re eating vegetables tonight—“

•“Yes”

•He probably shows teucer pics of you on the TV and makes him wear a shirt that has y/n supremacy written on it

•He makes teucer watch ur trailer the way toddlers watch cocomelon

•“Teucer this is the new cocomelon”

•Sometimes when he's babysitting Teucer he just deadpans and goes

•"Look, I'd be a great dad so [name] if you're hearing thisー"

•You know how Childe is a boss right? You're a boss too. He wouldn't attack you the first time because he's dying inside because you're basically flirting with him while fighting oh my fucking god lord have mercyー

•“Surrender is a valid option, I promise I’ll be gentle—“

•“Kiss me”

•Fighting your boss is literally the highlight of his week

•"WEEK 13 OF FIGHTING [name]!!"

•I know he would get jealous if you're shipped with another character

•“This fucking bastardー“ *never plays their story quest

•Loses 50/50 cause of said character, equips them and makes them fall to their death multiple times

•HE’LL DO THAT DAILY AND TREAT THEM AS A PRISONER ON THEIR TEAPOT

•“No lunch for prisoners like you” aggressively attacks them

•He technically lives for you. So see him building his whole teapot for you and you only

•He has a part in his tea pot that looks like a wedding ceremony and puts you at the altar

•I know he be begging mihoyo for a new skin for you after seeing after seeing fanart of you in a suit, Mihoyo isn't surprised at this point

•He made a little prison for everyone who stole his pity and regularly attacks them or equips them to make them fall off a cliff

•He cried when the teapot voice lines were about you wanting to introduce him to your family cause we all know how much of a family man he is

•He would make a whole lake for you in his teapot

•Him collecting your fish at your teapot world and then says shit like “everything for you beloved”

•Insert that one meme "anything for you Beyonce"

•HE GOT SO SCARED BECAUSE YOU ALREADY HAVE DEATH FLAGS SINCE THE BEGINNING

•"HUH? They might die? What do you mean?? they're safe in my teapot" *aggressively makes you a safe bunker in his teapot*

•Watches sad animations of you and your sibling and hugs Teucer for emotional support

•“Hahahaha guys they d-don’t have death f-flags! Alright!!” 

•The first stage of grief: denial.

•Childe getting frustrated because your cooldown is a fucking menace to his irritation and he's terrible with archers

•“Why did I pull for them? Well….they’re hot”

•The comments: I thought you like archers

•“No?? I only pullled for them because they’re hot and have you ever saw me playing an archer aside from y/n though, I GUESS YOU HAVEN’T” cue him running away from the mitachurl as soon as ur ult ends

•HE ALSO LIKES TO SLANDER YOU BUT IN A LOVING WAY LIKE “HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY FAVORITE LITTLE SHIT!”

•"Aww, my favorite menace to society"

•I know he gets all pouty when he finds out you're rich cause he wants to spoil you

•he would also flirt with your character using stupid puns

•“Are you water cause I'm thirstyー”

•Childe seems to be the type to flame you for your damage in co-op but is always so understanding when you're not good at the game and carries you

•I know his room is filled with merchandise you cannot convince me otherwise

•he has a whole shelf of plushies and figurines of you, he even had a narwhal plushie custom made inspired by you

•He hugs your narwhal plushies and pretend as if it was you #touchstarved

•Your narwhal plushies is literally in every corner of his room

•All in all, Teucer needs a break from his big brother's shenanigans 

《Reverse Streamer AU Masterlist》 : 《General Masterlist》

Taglist: @urujiako , @simplyxsinned , @starglitterz , @alberivh , @noirkkat , @chichikoi , @oreoz-unfortunately , @bookuya , @shxnosuke , @abyssheart , @almond-adeptus , @masterofbrioches , @almondoufu , @thomaghosty , @tsu-simps-for-pretty-bois , @spottyspatula , @icecappa , @mayple

Send an ask if you want to be added!

AH, ITS OKAY TAKE UR TIME!! don’t forget to rest!!

-anon who requested a part 2 of akito fic

ANONNN AGAIN IM SO SORRY FOR THE IDK HOW LONG THE DELAY OF REQUEST IS, AND EXAM IS NEARING TOO IM SO SORHEHDUSJ

Gaz: What’s your biggest fear?

(Y/n): One of us dying. I’m not really scared of anything else to be honest.

Gaz: What about you dying?

(Y/n), smiling: That’s my biggest hope.

Price, appearing out of nowhere: Stop.

Things I Wish I Could Say Out Loud...

¬ Not beta read

Lee x Commandant/Reader

Summary:

There are many things that Lee has documented into his data library. However, lately he has been taking a different method of documentation. This time it's with a voice recorder.

Tags: bittersweet, one-shot, potential spoilers for affection lvl.

"XX of XX, year 21XX, Construct: Lee. Location: Babylonia...... Recording session no. 108 of things I wish I could say out loud..."

*******

It was a small gift from Murray.

Lee took a look at it in his hand.

"What is this for?" the construct asked.

Murray smiled. However, Lee didn't find his own question funny.

"It's something I think you would like. You can record anything you want with it." the man said.

Inspecting the device, the construct only kept a neutral face before replying, "It's not necessary for constructs like me to have these things. My data recording mechanics works just as perfect, if not, it yields 30% more effective than of devices such as these. Output quality, file formating, and sound mixing are all put in consideration when you buy products like this. Constructs have many built in functionality, rendering these thing useless to them..."

Lee's voice faded as he spoke. A dead silence settled between them. The harsh words that Lee put forward didn't seem to hit Murray in anyway, a smile was still kept drawn on his face.

The silence, however, gave Lee an uncomfortable feeling. His synthetic skin mimicked goosebumps. He should say something to ease the silence. That's when he added, "... I don't need this, Murray."

He handed the device to his brother.

Murray shifted and a small laugh escaped his lips.

"I know it's useless, in a technical stand point. But," Murray gently pushed the device back into Lee's hand, "I ought to think that maybe, as useless as it may be, this is exactly what you need."

Lee, after thinking about it, decided to accept the gift out of courtesy. "Very well..." He replied and pocketed the gift.

After receiving the device, Lee gave it a go and tried it out a few times. He didn't like it, and was planning to disassemble the gadget instead.

However, he went against it due to a small talk when he bumped into Murray one day. Who, asked him about the gift, and Lee felt a reluctance to treat the device as it was intented.

He began finding use for the voice recorder. Using it, as a means to record logs or data, however, he found no joy in doing that.

During his weekly frame maintenance check, Lee spotted Asimov, owning the same model of voice recorder on his office desk. In fact there were two.

There was an urge to ask about it, seeing it was a coincidence. Asimov, his look as sour as ever, reply with a sarcastic flare, "One," he held up the left one, "is to document research logs. The other," he held up the right one, "is to collect all my disagreements and complaints against everyone here, hoping that one day I would drop this and have Hassen or someone pick it up and listen to it."

Disputes between departments in the council wasn't unheard of. However, Lee was interested at Asimov's latter use of a voice recorder. It wasn't a bad idea.

Sure, Lee himself has disagreements and verbal fights; especially towards Kamui. But, there were times he restricted his tougne for the sake of his Commandant.

So, when he returned to his quarters, he took the recorder and began to spew his complaints.

*******

"... I dislike the way you always put others before yourself..."

*******

The notification in Lee's system alerted him it was time for a special mission debriefing. The Grey Raven Squard were called in by Celica. Lee left his resting quarters as he headed out to the meeting room. There the rest of his team were waiting for him.

Celica came in last and placed a pile of paperwork on the table. Without hesitation, she began working on the control panel.

Lee noted that this usually means this particular mission is either important or it has a special status in the Babylonia database.

The lights dimmed. Images and information were projected up for everyone to see.

"Operation Underground..." Celica handed out her report file to you, "President Hassen wants the Grey Ravens to be dispatched as soon as possible, " she said.

"After some consideration and thorough analysis, it was concluded an archaic type of memory data is located under this ruin civilisation," the slide show propped up an image of a satelite map, "It was thought, back then, people had been toying about the concept of creating Constructs. Maybe that's why there are so many traces of memory data found there."

"you mean, memory data from the golden age?" you asked.

"Technology -wise yes, but the data... It could be a span ranging way before the golden age. The Science council had send teams to conduct excavation in the ruins, but through out the years corrupted levels are getting higher in that area," Celica said.

"Let me guess, Nikola wants us to investigate the area on the Science Council's behalf?" Lee asked.

"Actually, the main objective isn't to investigate the ruins , more so, President Hassen requested you guys to retrieve an archaic memory data. During the last excavation, the team found a Supercomputer, it was believe it stores the raw data. " she replied.

"but the supercomputers are so old, would the data even been salvageable upon retrieving?" Lucia asked, "As we know, technology back then has a higher probability of crashing and produce incomplete data."

"As long as the data is stored in a super computer, the percentage of data lost during extraction is small, compare to a data chip or a transferring port. Normally, supercomputers have two to four back up drive. If one drive or server courrpts, the other drive will immediately download the data. So extracting straight from a super computer is much safer. But, it's best if data loss can remain below 1.273%." Lee spoke.

Impressed by Lee's analysis, you closed the file and stood up. There was no time to waste in this operation.

"We will look into the details during our descent, Grey Ravens, move out." you ordered and your constructs followed.

As you all walked out of the meeting room, Celica said, "Oh, I almost forgot, this ruin is consider a danger zone, so please do not hesitate to retreat when necessary."

*******

"... I always do my best to serve you, even if my logic and words may make it sound the opposite. Please know, all that I am doing is all for your best interest as well as your future. You have to live, Commandant. At all cost... "

*******

He had been waiting for three hours, twenty four minutes and forty five seconds.

The door in the emergency wards was still closed. Lee could only sit in the waiting seat as his other teams mates were also rushed to the repair room.

He, himself, was considered lucky to have taken minimal damage, in comparison. His arm was ripped off and was given a temporary one for the time being. Although, it was advise to return to the Science department as soon as possible to replenish his vital fluids.

The door automatically slid open and the medical team, along with Asimov came out.

Lee turned his head and waited for the news Asimov had to deliver.

"Calm down, Lee, your Commandant is fine," Asimov huffed, he seems a little exhausted.

"I see, what's the condition?" Lee asked.

"You really need to look out for that Commandant of yours. "Brain damage" might sound a little too harsh, but that's the non techincal diagnosis." Asimov waved his hand, " a much techinal term would be, minor brain scarring."

Lee did not reacted.

"Don't worry about it too much. Your Commandant's condition is consider minor, the situation has been stablize. All that is left to do is to rest and recover."

"May I see Commandant?" Lee questioned.

"..." Asimov heasitated, "... Normally, I don't advise visitation, but, I guess I will let it slide this time." the man narrow his eyes a little.

"... But, I want you out in five minutes, understood?"

*******

"I am doing all this is because..."

*******

"Commandant..." Lee spoke in a small voice. You were asleep on the bed. Monitors and devices all plugged up to you as you slumber in the dimly lit room.

Seeing there was no response emitted from you, Lee spoke once more, "Really, Commandant, why do you have to push yourself again? How many times have you visited the medical bay this month? You know it worries us greatly..." He paused.

He was glad he went against your orders this time. If he hadn't called for Babylonia's retreat plan, you would end up in a much serious condition. Linking with the M. I. N. D beacon for an overwhelming amount of time, is not wise.

For sure, he knew you would get a little annoyed by that, and he played a fake scenario in his head that you were actually awake.

Talking to him, asking him why did he went against your orders, to retreat and not push through. He will agree everyone is close, so close to retrieve the data.

But monitoring the linking time, as well as, asking Liv to scan your physical condition once every 15 minutes. Lee can predict you won't last.

And, his prediction was right, and he should call for retreat much sooner. As soon as you arrived back at the base, you collapse on the floor. You nose bleed as you were rushed to the emergency ward.

His answer would have been the same as of Lucia's and Liv's. To protect your well being is a duty of a construct. However, he wasn't satisfied with that anwser.

There's more he wanted to say.

He knows he's not good with words, often making blunt jabs and spilling out harsh realities. Often times, he felt a little misunderstood because of it.

However, he tries. He really does. And, to be alone with the Commandant, in which, you were in a comatose state, might made it easier for the construct to say something.

Say something that he always wanted to say out loud.

He opened his mouth, lips forming shapes that helps projects words, yet no sound came out from his bionic voice.

He immediately gave up and went out of the emergency ward. That five minutes was over anyway.

*******

"... I want to be with you, be by your side for as long as humanly possible. I don't want to lose you, Commandant... "

*******

After a long break, you peak your head into the Grey Raven's Common room.

There, you saw your constructs resting together as usual. Putting up a big smile you playfully jumped out and reveal yourself at the door.

"I am here!"

"Commandant!" Lucia was surprised and quickly rush towards you Liv followed, happy to see you healthy and well.

As both constructs bombarded you with questions on your well being. Lee only approached and stood with a bit of distance.

"Lee?" you looked at him.

As usual, Palefire wore his signature scowl and crossed his arms, "... I see you are alive and well," he cleared his throat, "Welcome back, Commandant."

"Thank you, Lee."

*******

" Commandant, I...I... Humph..."

**Recording ended**

------------------------------------

Author's note

Hi, I like Lee a lot :)

BTW, the I. T stuff are all based on my limited knowledge of backing up my drawing files. Lol.

©Punishing-eden

Happy Birthday, Diluc!

"Paimon, if you stand there, I'm afraid the wind will blow you away..."

"One last place to clean! Traveler, after we finish cleaning the leaves, let's go to..."

"Master D—Diluc!"

A comfort and a warm.

Ft. Childe/Ajax

Cw : Male Reader, Reader's a florist! Story written from Childe/Ajax POV Ooc childe sobs. RUSHED ASF. Not proofread

Summary : Ajax has always been a lonely person who kept his burden all by himself, but not until a certain boy came to his life and lit his hollow soul ablaze.

A/N : its alr the end of the year lol, i just wanna say a lots and tons of sorry for being so inactive, basically school is destroying my sanity and i've been trying to finish my last request (very sorry to the anon) anw im writing this to fill my blog since its so empty

—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–

—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—-

After the abyss incident Ajax could feel that he was nothing but a living corpse that seek nothing but power, even when his family was always by his side and comforting him every night saying how grateful they were that he came back home in one piece, yes he may physically came home in one piece but what about his inner mind? Is he still the cheerful and innocent Ajax they used to know?

Ajax's family were very much aware about his abyss incident, and they were aware about how his mental condition were worsening when he joined the Fatui and yet they said and did nothing about it.

He had it said to himself that the day when the fatui took him in, "This is the end of my youth and the beggining of my day as a warrior, from today onward i promise I'll be stronger to protect those i care about." And thus he left his innocence behind and built himself a mask that he hoped will cover any remant of his childhood self.

Sure the masks of personality he built worked, but at what cost?

Ajax felt as if he was hollow, he wondered to himself if he was still alive at this point, everything he said everything he do felt meaningless even when he came home to the welcoming arm of his family he felt that something inside him were missing, sure he may looked happy but.. is that what he truly felt?

But even after all of that, he remembers one certain incident where... he met a certain boy that changes his view of world.

He remembers vividly, it was a pretty sunny day on liyue, as always ajax was wandering aimlessly whilst admiring the calming and busy atmosphere and even occasionally saying Hi to whoever he met whether it was colleagues or just someone he happens to know, that's until he stumbled upon a very familiar face, You.

—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–— Liyue 2 Years ago.

"Goodmorning comrade, is the flower selling well today?" I said to the person as i fasten up my pace and jumping giddily, a liyuean florist whom i and the other Liyuean people adored, because of his well known calm and reserved demeanor and a sweetest smile he earned a sweet title by the children as a "Sunflower Boy"

"Goodmorning, what should i call you today eh, Maybe young master?" He said while chuckling softly, Sadly unbeknownst to the liyue people He an Fatui Agent, A cold blooded killer hiding behind the sweet smile face that watches all over the Liyue.

"Aw come on (Name), lets put the work aside" ajax turned his gaze towards you while fiddling with the flower on display, "This looked fresh, when did u picked this qingxin?" He asked.

"Last mission, i found a place with lots qingxin so why not harvest it from there?" Heh last mission huh?

"Wasn't the last mission i sent u on was a bloodbath?" I said to him.

Huft... you sighed, "if you want to talk the details about the last mission we better not do it here, Childe."

"Oh? Calling by my codename rather than Tartaglia huh? Interesting" he chuckled, "is it a one step of getting closer?"

Honestly if i could ho and visit you everyday, I would.

"Anyway Childe, what brings you here?" He asked while organizing the flower bouquet.

"Well, i just wanted to see you. Beside i needed a flower for teucer, how much for this one" he said while pointing to a flower bouquet, "that one pretty, im sure teucer would love it."

"Teucer huh? Wait.. Teucer is here??" He turned his gaze at me completely shocked, "How come is he here? Did he run off again."

"Of course not! He said he missed Liyue and Teucer is teucer he begged to go to liyue with me."

"Heh Teucer always like that isn't he? Anyway here's your flower bucket sir, dont forget we have a meeting at 7PM today" he gave the flower bucket to me and grabbed my hand softly "Keep the money, beside i don't want my own superior to pay and dont't forget send my regard to teucer." He smiled fondly.

Somehow something inside my heart is burning truly, i could feel my face heatin up and my heart racing.

"Shit." I cursed down my breath and pulled my hand away from his, "Well ahem!, since we have a meeting today why dont i go treat you some meal before we began our work hm? You've been a really good assistant to me too these days, how about we go for third round knockout?"

"Sounds good! I was getting hungry myself." He said giggling, "but first i need to clean up the flower store." He hurriedly packed the flower away.

"Here let me help you comrade."

–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—-

Even until these day i wondered why you would hold my hand at the first place, Your hand not so fit for a florist, calloused and littered with scars but yet i somehow still adored it, at that time i wished the time could stop. I wished that we could hold hand a little longer.

A lot of people say that my action are getting a little too visible, how i smiled when his face randomly came on my mind or how sometimes he came to my office bringing the paperwork i need to do while smiling brightly, or maybe the time when he take cares of me while i was sick. I remember vividly, he would came to my office bringing me a cup of hot tea while ushing me to take a rest and said that he would take my place for a while, oh how sweet of him.

Even my fellow harbinger friend "Signora" said

"Poor boy tartaglia, can't even confess his feeling to his own assistant? You know that our job is dangerous right? death is not a uncommon thing here, either you will run out of time or..."

"Or what signora." I said my tone coming out coldly

"You know it already tartaglia."

–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—– 1.45 AM Tartaglia Office

I scribbled down the last stack paperwork i needed to fill and submit whilst feeling that in any second my head could've exploded.

Just what time is it? I turned my head over to the clock sitting next to the sofa clearly showing that its past midnight and yet here i am trying to finish of what seem like non ending paperwork, should i just gave up? I have a free schedule tommorow anyway slacking off a little wouldn't hurt right? Right.

Slowly i could feel that my eyes is getting droopy and my body relaxing, i rested my head down to the desk im working at and slowly drifting to slumber.

But clearly before i was completely sleeping i could hear my office door slowly sliding open following with a long sigh of a certain person?? Honestly i was too tired to even look up and checked who it was.

Again before i knew it the next morning i woke up with a jacket draped over my shoulder and a finished paperwork? Half of it are already submitted i wonder, and a little note saying that i shouldn't overworked myself.

Straightening myself up i take off the jacket and inspected it for a little while finding a nametag signed "(Name)" in it. I couldn't help but let out a little laugh, Why do you care so much about me (Name)?

–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—-

After everthing you've done for me, how could i repay you? I remembered one single memory where everything changed, both you and me.

-

Sometimes i could walked down the hallway with a bruised and bloodied body, and yet i never came running down to seek the medical staff, i walked myself to your office, where i know you would stay there and do whatever you needed to do, i know this has been the countless time i did it but yet, you never showed anger you welcomed me with open arms and tended my wound with your gentle hand, a hand that healed my inner self.

I knocked softly on your office door, "(Name) are you there? Its me, i got.. problems."

"Be right there" i could hear a faint shuffling and a rushing steps running to the door.

And the door opened, revealing you with a shocked and somewhat concerned face mixed with "I know this would happen" expression, "Well, good evening comrade as you see uhh i got trouble here." I tried to put my usually bright self.

"Get inside and sit down, let me get my medical kit"

I did as he ordered me to, i sat down to the usualy chair where he tended my wound and maybe sometimes where i would drop in and said Hi to him while he was resting.

"Look Ajax i do not want to hear your reason about this injury, im growing indeed tired of hearing your exact same reason." He said while sitting on a small chair and giving me a gesture to open up my clothes, "Open it i need to see the wounds"

"You know that its better for you to seek the actual medical staff and get yourself patched up there"

"Honestly (Name) my injuries heals faster if the one who patched it up is you" i said while smiling giddily, "But anyway thanks for always doing this though, i know i should've gone to the infirmary but yet i came up running to you"

"Sure yea, this might sting a little stay still."

Sting a little? I couldn't even feel anything when my mind is totally centered to how your hand tended my injuries.

When he patched me up, i stayed silent the rest of the time, i thinked about how he still wants to do this despite scolding me for a thousand time already.

"There and its done" he said while giving my back a little rub, "as i said next time dont overdo it Ajax, anyway here's your clothes the weather is really cold today isnt it?"

"Thank you (Name), and could i ask you something?"

"Ask away Ajax"

"Why do you keep doing this, despite of how many time you said to me that i was a nuisance? And the amount of stuff you did to me. Truly it did leave a mark at my heart, You know that time? When we met and talked at your flower shop and you hold my hand? I swear i couldm't get enough of it, and you know i've been holding myself to say this. I Liked you alot! More than friends if you are wondering, its fine if you dont feel the same, atleast i could get it out of my chest" i poured all the feeling i've been holding on for so many days, secretly i hoped that you would share the same feelings with me.

"And (Name) being with you truly healed my inner self, You did keep me sane the whole time you know that?" I laughed, while trying to hold in the little tears that pooled around the corner of my eye.

"Well Ajax, In fact i did share the same feeling with you, I Liked you too! Way longer than you did, i strucked love when i met you on your recruit days, we were on the same teams that day"

He said while Holding our hand together, but this time it was more genuine.

"I.. how could i not know then?"

"Maybe because you're too busy getting that harbinger title"

"(Name) i do not know how to respond to this, truly thank you, Thank you for everything." I squezzed his hand gently, "Thank You."

I never felt anything more happy than this, That day i feel that he has set my hollow soul ablaze.

–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—-–—-

Bonus lmao :

"Hey (Name)" i turned my sight to him

"Yes?"

"Could i ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Kiss the injuries it helps them heals faster"

"....."

"No"

(Name) proceeds to smother ajax w little kisses and yes it make Ajax giggle and kicks his feet like a damn toddler

–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—–—-

Note : Thanks i know that this cringe but thank you truly.

Presented to my silly babi @adrifts-home

A STRENGTH OF A THOUSAND.

— manjiro sano x reader

— themes. angst, implied character death

— tw. su*cide

— inspired by that one heartbreaking scene from a silent voice movie.

in hindsight, you should have seen this coming. warning bells blaring in your ears, but for some reason, you weren't able to hear it. only now have you trully seen the dead, cold look in his eyes that continuously begs for some sort of relief, and his chapped lips that bleeds everytime he gnaws at it to keep his expression as neutral as possible; to keep everything bottled up because he believes he does not deserve to be relieved of the crushing weight that burdened his shoulders.

you should have seen this coming—his endpoint. the day he finally snaps and he's ready to admit just how tired he was of living. his face, void of any emotions just like the dead look in his eyes, but the shakiness of his hands betrayed his thoughts.

and then you realized mikey didn't want to die, he just thinks he has to for the sake of the future takemitchi wants. a future where everyone is alive and happy. you—where were you when all of this happening to him? sleeping soundly while his monstrous thoughts ate his mind up and kept him awake at night? laughing together with your friends while he stays in this rundown building, utterly alone with no one but himself to comfort.

where were you when mikey needed the help the most?

"mikey, come down from there—" you can hear your voice tremble as you took a careful step forward. mikey's back faced you, the bonten insignia on his neck glaring harshly down on you; like it was mocking you for being so ignorant of your friend. mikey stays incredibly still, balancing on the rooftop railing with his arms limped on his sides.

only now have you noticed how incredibly thin he was, as if his arms were going to snap at any given pressure. "come down, please?"

mikey ignores your pleas like you weren't there at all. he looks up to see the full moon that shined above his lonesome figure, and he realized how peaceful the night can be if he looked at it more closely. he can hear someone shout from the bottom, though he assumes it were probably his subordinates who are currently watching his every move right now.

mikey smiles so painfully fake and he turns around to face you. your breath hitches, caught in your throat as his feet edged closer to nothingness. "i'm happy," he says. there were no tears, but his vacant eyes cried for solace. your lips quivered when you took another step near, only to stop when he takes one back. you blinked away the tears that were starting to form itself at the corner of your eyes, and you could feel them run down your cheeks. "i'm happy that i get to see you one last time."

your eyes widened when mikey lifts both of his arms up, one foot into the air to move forward. "mikey—"

"i'm really happy."

you don't know what happened after he had said that. everything became a blur, and all you know was the feeling of pure adrenaline rushing through your veins, the way your heart raced as if you had just ran a hundred miles.

you blinked and you were suddenly leaning against the railing where mikey once stood, hands stretched downward and you could finally feel the abnormally light weight of mikey's body dragging you down. you looked down and you see him, except his eyes were no longer void of anything—the blackness of his irises were scared, for you or for him, you weren't sure. the blackness of his irises shook, and he shouts in the highest volume that you didn't know he was capable of.

"what the hell are you doing?!"

your arms were beginning to ache, granted you have never once worked out to keep your body in shape. you weren't as strong as draken, nor mikey himself. if anything, you were probably even weaker than takemitchi who atleast have the power of a thousand in his heart.

but you pushed yourself on the balls of your feets anyway, one hand gripping on the railing for support while you tried your best to pull him up. "just let me go," you heard him sniffle, and there were tears now flowing from his eyes. mikey stares at you and you could only stare back.

you could feel your feet being lifted off of the ground the longer you hold him, and it is then you realized you don't have much time. the one hand that supported your weight on the railing lets go to clasp them around mikey's wrist, and you gave him a smile despite the tears and snot that messily decorates your face.

"you really think i can do that?" you choked out. "just grab on to the railing, mikey—"

there was nothing holding you back from falling down yourself but fright was not the emotion that cursed through you when you felt the way your feet had lifted off of the ground completely. all you felt was the fear of not being able to save mikey, fear for the future where he won't be alive to see another day; the future where he's only a passing memory.

you didn't want that.

mikey's free hand quietly reached up to the railing. something about your stubbornness, how you're risking your life to save him right now, is reawakening his desire to continue on living—with you, with everyone. the way your hands tightly held his without any intention of letting him go stirred something within him, and he finds himself trying to escape the death he have craved for so long.

you pulled mikey up with every once of strength you've got and he finds himself doing the same. his feet barely grazing the solid cement of the rooftop, but when he turns to the side to look at you with his tear-filled eyes, you weren't there to greet him anymore.

you could feel the air enter your lungs and danced inbetween your hair. suspended as gravity rapidly tried to pull you back down to the ground. you stared as mikey's figure becomes smaller and smaller, and you suddenly remembered how you were supposed to be scared of heights.

however, as you continued to fall to your doom, the fear you once felt were all washed out of your system, because as you stared at mikey's tiny silhouette, all you felt was relief.

that he's alive.

and that's all you cared about even when your back harshly meets the earth, and your eyes does not open to see him one more time.