The Chosen One: Vanilla Extract.

Tuesday February 7.

The Chosen One: Vanilla Extract.

The hero we need and deserve right now. Ever been making a cake, and then baking a cake, and then consuming a cake, a cake you will subsequently defecate, when you've been haunted by that strangest of feelings that something just isn't quite right? That something is missing. That within this process there has been a void beyond that of the baking process: a void that is not just culinary, but spiritual. It's good, but it's not right. You made it as instructed, and it looks good, and tastes fine too. The good people around you have also taken a fork, which they have politely, and apparently sincerely, enjoyed. One even took a picture which they will later upload on Instagram, with crude, flashing animations of cakes, and captions reading: Cake time! Yum!. The words jump merrily from side to side in neon colors and the cake rests handsomely, with several slices missing. But you know, they know it. It is evident in their expressions: the light is dimmed in their smiles somewhat. They too possess something unshakeable in this mouthful. Something here is left to be desired, and desire as Robert Hass ruminates, is full of endless distances. Hold the f*cking phone, someone says, their eyes suddenly luminous. I know what this needs: #vanilla extract. 

More Posts from Whotoldyouso and Others

1 month ago

@tiredguyswag said you cannot take community action if you cannot stomach having to take individual action and honestly? why would you hide this in the tags?

I'm from the us and like..the people in your notes have me soooo confused. Are they genuinely saying its hard to boycott...fast food? Like not even all fast food places, McDonald's specifically?? It has me confused because -

1.These people are mainly grown ass adults and whining about it.

2.Its not hard to...not go to McDonald's??🤨

Like i was 15 when the boycott started, and as soon as it did I told my mom that we should stop going and why, and we havent gone back since. It's not hard at all to stop going to fast food chains, again let alone McDonald's. And it's not like my mom and I are mega rich, we have money issues too and yet we rarely get fast food, and when we do it's not McDonald's.

Maybe im missing something but do people not know that if you (generally speaking) have the mentality of "I'm just one person, what can I do?" Then shit never gets done??

And with all this time they spent explaining why boycotting is "hard" they could've been like, idk, sharing resources to people who dont know about it? 🤷🏾‍♀️Reflecting on why they think this way, reflecting on why theres a boycott instead of making excuses? Like again I'm seeing grown ass people who've been grown for a while doing this shit, and it has me so confused .🤦🏾‍♀️

Also in case someone gets like, pissy about me saying this and tries to say I'm like- idk, probably a white person on a high horse saying all this (which it wouldnt matter either way but oh well)- I'm black .🙂👍🏾

Sorry to you if this comes across as annoying,, I just wanted to share my thoughts 😺

yeah the amount of time they spent whining could have been used to do better things.

it's not like mcd is the only restaurant chain in the usa. you can always eat somewhere that isn't giving money to a genocidal army.

honestly thank you 🥹🥹 you're one of the only sane usamericans to respond to that post

4 months ago

to all the mice living in my walls, you are valid.

squeak squeak my brothers


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3 months ago

i am not saying female characters cannot be homophobic, and neither am I saying all fics are like this. But if you just target female characters for the purpose of fighting homophobia you're either being lazy or misogynist. Gay people are literally being shunned around the world by religious bigots, toxic masculinity, the law system and politicians but the only cause of homophobia you could come up with is.... women. nice.

i know you guys are going to kill me for this but,,, When people write gay fiction on heteronormative shows e.g Sherlock, the female love interest is villainized or dumbed down. You try to show that homophobia and queerbaiting is bad but you just end up decimating female characters on the basis that they're 'coming in between the main ship' . Why. Aren't there other ways to fight homophobia other than just being wildly inaccurate or just plain mean about female characters? I can see this crap with Sharon Carter and Molly Hooper on this site.


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1 month ago

crazy how people will go out of their way to make existence hell for anyone who don't fit their definition of 'correct' people. we could be crotcheting rn. we could be kissing if you weren't such a bitch. have you thought of that


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3 months ago

suddenly i feel unsafe

i love choccy milk

I Love Choccy Milk

best food ever


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1 month ago

which one? being specific leads to concentrated effort teeheehee

replacing 'im gonna kill myself' with 'im gonna assassinate a former us president'. this is gonna do wonders for my mental health.

3 months ago

now, i know you need to know how to use this. it's very simple.

woman: *expresses interest in a male, a certain type of food, or activity*

you: are straight girls okay???

alternatively-

woman:* partakes in an activity or a tradition that poses a threat to no one, and harms nobody's feelings*

you: lmaoo white women are so basic

And there you go! now you can actively be mean and demeaning towards women, because hey, they're white and straight! you said so! everybody will love you too, because you're fighting the oppressor, right? Yay!

hey y'all! no you must be thinking, tumblr isn't any place for misogyny! we'd detect it immediately! but not to worry, my friends. there is always a little space everywhere for a little bit of woman-hating. You can spread hate against women as long as you say 'white', 'straight', or better, 'white and straight'. Shove those two words in and BAM!! instant hit. You're so liberal now! no one will ever detect any misogyny!


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whotoldyouso - Ayyyyyyyyyy Macarena
Ayyyyyyyyyy Macarena

Aspiring writer, watches movie recaps instead of watching the movie, wannabe artist

273 posts

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