I Left A Comment On A Cumplane Fic Earlier About How Shang Qinghua Deserves To Suffer (context Was That

I just think Shang Qinghua should get so angry one time that he unconsciously overrides the System and unlocks Admin privileges and just deletes entire clans out of existance in the blink of an eye while going "writing you in was a mistake".

And I also think everyone who saw that refuses to ever talk about it, but they're all scared shitless of the tiny human by Mobei-jun's side now because they realize he's not just really smart and an amazing strategist, he's also a god and can kill them all in 0.5 seconds. And now they all think that Shang Qinghua is actually the one running the show and Mobei-jun is just, like, the face of the Northern kingdom only.

Shang Qinghua is utterly horrified when he snaps out of it and realizes what he's done (somehow??? He doesn't know wtf just happened) and how now everyone is terrified of him except for Mobei-jun who is just looking at him with heart in his eyes lmao

cumplane thoughts: (lots of nsfw LOL)

airplane in shen yuan's lap, cockwarming for him while he writes and shen yuan looks over his shoulder, sharply criticizing his writing

shen yuan using his advanced knowledge of pidw to wifeplot the fuck out of airplane (its not his fault that airplane doesnt remember that flower is an aphrodisiac or this cave is the "ohno now we have to get married!" cave. really, it was irresponsible of airplane to forget such things and this was the forgone conclusion of that hack author being so forgetful)

cucumber and airplane being enemies online, but crushing on each other irl without knowing about the online handles (classmates? workmates? that cute guy i see on the train?)

shen twins au where shen yuan notices that disciple shang is kinda sus and investigates (thinking that its bc of the mobei jun thing and now that he's grown up in this world he's sort of invested in NOT having demons attack his sect-mates), but the more he gets to know the skittish disciple, the more he's sorta catching feelings and this is a problem! bc shang qinghua is gonna be a traitor! ....but is he really? sure, qinghua is a lil asshole, but he's not really the bloodthirsty type? maybe with some proper guidance from his shixiong he'll turn out better? no, jiu-ge, i am not being naive and no i dont think my dick cures evil, its not like that! it's just that--why are you calling him my boyfriend?! I SAID IT'S NOT LIKE THAT, JIU-GE!

cumplane frenemies since their school days and current roommates. shen "i'm not gay so the sex isnt gay" yuan and shang "you're not fooling anyone but sure" qinghua. they're just 'friends' according to shen yuan. it's 'no homo sex' apparently. shang qinghua is fine with this, he is, his stupid boyfriend might have the most internalized homophobia in the world but like... they live together and shen yuan is mostly nice to him and they've been together for years and this is something real, right? except shen yuan's mom starts pressuring him to "finally settle down and marry a nice girl" so shen yuan is talking about it and the sinking realization finally hits shang qinghua that shen yuan never really considered their relationship to be a real thing. thats... fine... this is fine... he'll be fine. he is not fine. nope. not one bit. and he is not gonna be the bigger man about this. fuck. no. he is absolutely going to fucking destroy that stupid piece of shit EX boyfriend who never deserved him!! he is going to avenge himself and ruin shen yuan's life and he is going to be super shitty about it! but first, he's going to run away from home and cry with a tub of ice-cream bc wow that is the most painful breakup he's ever had haha. except after shang qinghua disappears and leaves behind a "fuck you, i want a divorce" note, shen yuan looks for him and asks friends and gets dressed down for being an idiot and also realizes oh fuck he actually totally was in love with his not-boyfriend and now he has to win back a very vengeful and very bitter shang qinghua, who also knows all of his weaknesses and darkest secrets

cumplane sex where cucumber is struggling to comprehend just how fucking shameless airplane is. that man can ride his dick while moaning pathetically and then still look cucumber in the face and smile while asking for round five and cucumber knew that airplane wrote porn, cucumber READ that porn, but nothing quite prepared him for just how horny and sexually expressive airplane is. SHEN YUAN'S THIN FACE WAS NOT READY FOR THIS SHIT

shang twins au: the shang twins have been pretending to be one person, for vaguely evil reasons, and shen yuan notices solely bc he Is A Very Observant and Smart Person and it's not at all because he's memorized the pattern of airplane's freckles or anything gay like that, nope, that's not it at all!

cucumber starts talking to one of airplanes various troll alts that he uses to stir up drama and airplane replies, fully intending to further agitate one of his loudest anti-fans except.... they just kinda... keep talking? and airplane is really enjoying himself? and they're taking it to the dms and now they're kinda friends and shit, it's bad if cucumber finds out he's airplane, right? the entire basis of their friendship is a lie then. which is totally fine, haha, this friendship prolly won't last long. except it totally does and now theres like irl meetings and cucumber is Fucking Handsome and that isn't fair AT ALL bc now airplane has a crush on his (best??)friend and ohwow, cucumber can srsly NEVER learn abt his identity as the author. cucumber is a super bitter and grudge holding person but also he HATES the author and airplane rreeeallly likes having someone who kinda likes him in his life aND OHFUCK IS THAT CUCUMBER LOOKING AT HIS PHONE!?

shen yuan making airplane endure Every Single sex position that he wrote those poor wives in the harem having to endure. partially to make a point of "that CANT be possible", partially bc he's still annoyed at the hack writing, and partially bc it's rrreeeeeaallly nice to see airplane fucked out of his mind like that

airplane accidentally wife-plots himself and cucumber is a good bro about it and fucks away the fuck-or-die pollen. except now he's accidentally gotten airplane addicted to his dick??? bc now airplane is seeking him out constantly. was there something else in that fuck-or-die pollen? bc airplane is acting weird. was there some freaky love potion or something? ahh, it's really hard to think of the answer when he wakes up to the peak lord of an ding sucking his dick

airplane accidentally gets transformed into a magical beast and before he can find his way back to humanity, he gets beaten up and hauled off by liu qingge to be presented as a gift to shen yuan. which oki, fine, maybe he can communicate to his bro. but shen yuan is really nice to him when he's in this form (like a hamster monster) and wow, he never knew how much he really liked shen yuan being nice to him??? maybe he should just let it be for a bit longer??

shen yuan, recently trasnmigrated into the body of an ice demon, does not know what to do about the sobbing an ding disciple clinging to his thigh and begging for his life (bc i refuse to kill off mobei jun, this is a body swap au and now mobei jun has to live in modern day china as shen yuan LOL)

cucumber decides that he likes airplane best when he's too fucked out of his mind to keep talking shit. also, on a related note, airplane decides he likes when cucumber talks shit when they're in bed the most. does he have a degradation kink? he might have a degradation kink.

sugar baby airplane and his very grumpy sugar daddy shen yuan. yes, airplane is spoiled rotten, but he also has a strict writing schedule and his harshest critic tormenting him in bed. but ohwell, shen yuan also nags him to eat properly and makes sure that he does and the kitchen is always stocked and sometimes shen yuan just pulls him into a hug and rests his chin against airplane's head and yeah, he can live with sometimes getting fucked while cucumber growls in his ear "that was a shit chapter, you completely forgot the continuity from chapter 24 and now you created a big stupid plothole with the most interesting monster you made--". its a good life

airplane first meets shen yuan as a coworker. he's a rich trust-fund baby type who has impeccable fashion and a poser attitude. clearly a thin face and probably boring as fuck. airplane meets shen yuan for the second time at a convention while signing autographs, dressed in binghe-merch and clearly Way Too Invested. and airplane immediately thinks the gap moe is AMAZING. he's gonna have so much fucking fun with this. especially since airplane was wearing cosplay and his coworker didn't recognize him >:D

"I still can't believe you named not one, but two characters after yourself," Shen Yuan grumbled from where he was using his husband's shoulder as a pillow, arms wrapped around his waist and puffing warm breaths onto his cheek. "And one of them was that shitty fucking spy."

"I wouldn't say he was shitty," Luo Qinghua said, continuing to type away at the draft for his newest chapter. He loved that he was finally able to actually sit and plan his story out now, rather than have to continuously churn out 10k a day just to make ends meet. Small perks of marrying into a rich family.

Shen Yuan sat up to look him in the eye, accidentally leaning too far backwards in the process. Luo Qinghua quickly reached out to grab the other's thighs to avoid them both tipping over. "Shang Qinghua literally gets exposed as a spy--"

"After several fucking years--"

"--And is immediately killed by Mobei-Jun afterward because he's of no more use!" Shen Yuan continued on as if he hadn't been interrupted. "I'm just saying that you could and would do a far better job. Even though you suck at being sneaky."

"Ahaha, yeah," Luo Qinghua said, averting his gaze. What his husband didn't know about the limited edition PDIW merch he had hidden away in the closet for his upcoming birthday, couldn't hurt him. Shen Yuan narrowed his eyes at him and opened his mouth, so Luo Qinghua quickly kept going. "Well, even if I could do it, I don't know if I would've been able to do all those things Shang Qinghua did, anyway. Planning murder and sabotaging sects isn't really my hobby, you know?"

"Mhm." Shen Yuan pursed his lips, still suspicious, but deciding to go with it. Crisis averted! Though Luo Qinghua knew that Shen Yuan would bring it up later. "I think you'd be clever enough to, but yeah, you wouldn't." Shen Yuan suddenly smirked and unwound his arms from around Luo Qinghua's waist, reaching up instead to interlock them around his neck and pull him closer. "Either way, if I were Mobei-Jun, I would've kept you."

"I'm your husband, even if I was the worst spy on Earth, you would've kept me, regardless," Luo Qinghua deadpanned. Still, he felt his face flushing a light pink. The way Shen Yuan was looking at him made his skin prickle with warmth.

"Mm, exactly," Shen Yuan hummed and pressed his mouth to Luo Qinghua's collarbone. Luo Qinghua shivered. His voice shifted, lower and teasing. "Husband."

"Yes, A-Yuan?" One of his hands stayed on Shen Yuan's thighs while the other reached up to rest on his lower back, caressing the soft skin peeking out from beneath his shirt.

"Save your draft and turn off your laptop."

Luo Qinghua was moving before Shen Yuan had even finished.

we had the black history show at our school! here are some pics and clips! #blackhistorymonth (at William H. Turner Technical Arts High School) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bum1xP_ngNi/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1ni989fl9kz5b

Shang Qinghua: Ugh, my waist really hurts.

Shen Qingqiu: Did we go too hard last night?

Shang Qinghua: YES! Didn't you hear me beg to slow down????

Shen Qingqiu: Oh, I thought you were just crying for attention as always?

The Other Peak Lords: What the fuck is going on.

Last Night

Shang Qinghua: BRO THIS HURTS!!! PLEASE HAVE MERCY!!

Shen Qingqiu: No can do, bro. *flicks Twister spinner* Left hand on red.

my new church is so pretty! here’s the opening hallway and two of my most favorite paintings 🖼 #church #prettychurch #prettypainting https://www.instagram.com/p/BwCZSewHgSv/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=17irnagdaaf79

Washington, D.C. was so fun! We saw a lotta sights 😋😋#washingtondc #lincolnmemorial #otherstuff (at Washington, District of Columbia) https://www.instagram.com/p/BtOoynCnn41/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=139ndy7jzd4ab

Luo Binghe's blood parasites but when you zoom in with a microscope they all look like tiny red bingpups, frolicking and tussling among the blood cells.

ive always been a fan of actor AUs

Okay, darlings. This fandom has managed to drive an author from it and they went out with a nuke. All of their work, gone. So it's time to have a talk. I'd love to think none of you were involved in it, so hopefully this is more a reminder to reblog than to have to apply, but it's time to have a talk.

First off, I'm not going to name the author. Their story is theirs. I'm just going to talk generally.

You DO NOT tell an author to kill themselves (kys) or threaten to harm them or that you'll find them or that they're writing their story wrong. YOU JUST DON'T.

"Well that's how I joke with my friends--" Stop. Authors are not your friends. They are at best acquaintances and more likely strangers. They might be friendly with you. I'm friendly with many of you because I see you often in comments/replies and such. And some of you have become friends. But the average author is not your friend, they are a stranger. And if you're the type of person who would tell a stranger to kill themselves, you need professional help in dealing with something deep inside you and I hope you find it.

Authors are out here writing entertainment and sharing it for free. You respect that and be kind. If you can't be kind, you leave. The back button is right there.

This is not an airport, you do not need to announce your departure. If a fic goes a way that you do not like, you unsubscribe and hit that back button. If it turns too angsty or sappy or violent, back button. If their characterization bothers you, back button. You do not need to tell as stranger providing free effort that you hate what they are producing. This fandom is so damn prolific, there's something out there for you, it doesn't have to be that fic.

Please just be kind. The world is horrible enough right now. And if you can't be kind, back button.