Yess!!!

perfuma: i don’t have a seat

scorpia: you can sit on my lap

perfuma, blushing: thanks

sea hawk: i don’t have a seat either

mermista: stand then

Rachel Weisz talking about her persuit of finding a script with ‘two good female parts’ 

Boba Fett's reputation as the best bounty hunter in the galaxy comes from him pulling off an insane number of jobs throughout his life, some of which were even deemed impossible for a lone hunter to pull off

funnily enough, he doesn't actually remember completing all of the ones people attribute to him, but after seeing the footage and biometric proof, he assumes that he's been blacking out and entering some sort of exhaustion fugue state, or maybe he's just had a few too many concussions

it's not until he tries to claim a puck from the guild and is told that he's already working that job that he starts to figure out that something more is going on, and decides to investigate who it is that's been working this job

as it turns out, there's actually like ten different escaped clones pulling bounties under his name, considering they all share the same DNA and face, who've put together a few fake versions of his father's armor

many of them even work in teams, trading off who gets to 'play Boba' to the guild or clients

(they've also been using their shared DNA to access his space netflix account, which explains why the recommendation algorithm never seems to figure out what he likes and keeps telling him that he's already watched shows he finds)

(strangely, he realizes that they haven't touched any of his bank accounts, despite the fact that they could certainly have gotten through their security measures the same way)

after discovering this, he considers confronting them, killing them, even just turning them in to the guild

but then he'd lose some of his reputation if it comes out that impersonators can mimic him well enough to get the job done just as well as he could

so he just sends them all a message telling them to not fuck this up and continues with this life

Au idea

Obi-wan 'I see dead People' Kenobi.

The boy has always been able to see the ghosts of past jedi and sometimes even a dead sith or 2.

Little 4 year old Obi-wan looking Master Yoda right in the eyes and telling him that fucking Jedi Knight Revan thinks his ideas are dumb and he says Obi-wan should go be a pirate. (Once Revan realized Obi-wan could see and hear him he was like 'im causing problems on purpose' just to rile up the council)

Fucking Tarre Viszla is constantly nagging him about getting armor (he does eventually give in to this)

The day he looked at the council and parroted some heretical ideology from a jedi 1000 years dead was the day Qui-gon was like "this is my child now". He had to fight Madam Nu for him. The match was a tie. They have joint custody.

For the longest time everyone thought Obi-wan was making shit up but that got quickly thrown out. It's hard not to believe it when he's spilling the beans about something Yoda did when he was 3 that only Yoda's Master and crechemaster should know about.

Shit gets less funny and more scary when the fucking Sith Ghosts come to talk to him. Obi-wan coming to his crechemaster like Darth Immolation just tried to coerce him to the darkside again and wont go away, he just wants to eat his cookies and drink his juice in peace.

Jedi ghosts and Sith ghosts fucking bickering whenever they are forced to interact. Its mostly Darth Whomever being bullied by the Jedi until they go away.

Jedi Shadows having to dust off the 'How to banish Sith Ghosts' manuals that haven't been touched since just after the last sith war.

Qui-gon slowly learning how to communicate with the dead jedi as well. Hours spent in the archives. In sith ruins. In jedi ruins. On Jedah. Qui-gon getting heckled by a gaggle of dead jedi every time he fucks something up once he can see/hear them.

Obi-wan and his posse of dead jedi masters. Their connection to Obi-wan gives them the limited ability to interact with the physical world. So spooky ghost shit is always happening around him. They will hide your shit if youre being rude to their grandson/padwan/bff/only-connection-to-the-world/whatever the fuck he is.

Anakin shows up and he learns to hear them in the force. This somehow leads him to avoid Sheev and go to therapy. The ghosts bullied Qui-gon and Obi-wan into therapy too.

Obi-wan explaining to his clone troopers that no he isn't crazy. He is talking to the ghost of a jedi that has been dead for 1000 years about battle tactics. No really. Ask the temple healers and the rest of the council. Yes Boil ghosts are real. Please calm down. Yes theyre the ones that left the creepy note on the fresher mirror about washing your hands.

Oh fuck. The Living Council having to come to terms with the fact that Obi-wan being on the council means they now have a Dead Council they have to deal with. Mace has never been more entertained than when listening to Obi-wan argue with Yoda on their behalf. He should start bringing snacks.

Obviously this saves the galaxy. Somehow. Most of the ghosts are from a time around the last sith wars? They can sniff out any sith business when Obi-wan is close to it? One of them find Sheevs lightsaber? Idk.

WandaVision is just Wanda's fixitfic, EveryoneLivesAU, and I think its time we discussed that.

Secret Clones AU

Short version: Secret Clones AU is the clones going into hiding in plain sight across the galaxy to force a fair wage and also to keep the babies safe from Kaminoans

The clones figure out the plan to take advantage of them, brain chips, etc. several years before the war hits. IDK how, maybe Jango decided to take a closer look with Mij and went Oh Shit. Doesn't matter. Point is, they caught on and decided that they needed to uhhhhh get Out.

There are millions of clones, yes, but there are tens of thousands of planets.

Once the chips are out and someone's jabbed them with anti-aging serum... they're not that different from standard humans.

And it's not exactly hard to tie up the Kaminoans long enough to get off planet.

So what happens is that a while, let's say a year and a half, before the war kicks off, you have a mass exodus from Kamino, and a wide dispersal of clones. They are generally staying together in groups of about half a dozen, claiming to be brothers, so that there's a 16-18-ish looking clone to take lead, with progressively younger cadets to look after. Each one has a commander they can 'report' to in case of emergency, and if something goes real bad, they can call in an Alpha (and Alphas can call in Jango in a worst case scenario).

It's still sort of a military structure, but... it's a phone tree.

And you have one of these groups of half a dozen clones in every major city. There are thousands of planets, and most of those planets have more than one city. Denon and Coruscant are nothing but city, so they can get counted as dozens of cities on their own. It's easy to disappear in places like that.

It's so easy for the clones, before anyone knows them, to just... disappear. Go into hiding in plain sight.

It's not like more than a handful of people know what to look for.

(It's not like they have a centralized record of who went where.)

(It's just the phone tree.)

They still get real excited-happy-eager when they run into a Jedi.

They want to work with Jedi. They're the good guys! And they're cool!

But your army did a mass desertion before the war started and finding/recruiting all of them is going to take a stupid amount of money. You cannot hire a bounty hunter for each and every clone.

And as @bytebun put it:

Somebody two years later: you look …familiar. Have we met? Clone: haha I get that a lot just one of those faces

AND THEY CAN GET AWAY WITH IT BECAUSE THE GALAXY IS HECKING MASSIVE

I think the Republic has to like… negotiate with Jango and the Alphas and set up paid contracts if they want these Ultra Skilled Warriors to fight for them.

The clones can fight. Some of them even want to fight. They are good at this and they recognize that many of the things that are occurring under Separatist invasion are Mega Bad.

But like. Pay them and treat them as citizens, first.

The Jedi are even more confused about this identical army that really loves them than they are in canon Where the heck did you guys come from Who trained you Why do you like us What the heck is going on

"Someone wanted us to be a trap for you but we took the trap out. Here we have a sample if you want. Anyway. We like you guys and want to fight with you because honestly civilian life is way understimulating. Let me punch a droid."

I think a few of the clones do 'scouting' where they voluntarily help a Jedi in the field to gather information on their validity as Friends. Cody keeps a number of spreadsheets that are just Various Jedi Encounters.

Rex does a scouting mission with Kenobi&Skywalker and just goes to Cody like "Listen. I know he's insane. But. I want that one."

Rex just "I call dibs" "Cody. Cody did you hear me. Dibs, I call dibs."

@catboydogma: stats for pong krell are all zeroes

Absolute shit tier Jedi They play rock paper scissors to decide who has to deal with him

A solid half of the clones don't get recruited because the lack of advanced aging (past a certain point) means they're physically still minors and My Dad (Alphas and CCs) Said No. They stay behind on their various planets to look after The Real Babies.

"Let me ask my dad" "Wait--" "He said no."

Just want these boys to have Civilian Lives they can return to or at least experience before war gets them all fucked up.

I think some of them try to Make Connections with influential people (whether politicians or like... Space Influencers) so they have people vouching for them once the war kicks off. And there can be at least some public pushback on functionally enslaving them.

"I can't believe you manipulated people into liking you! That's so mean!" "Well you see. I wanted to survive past the age of eleven. So."

Warrior Nun fandom, anyone done a music video on YouTube with Sabaton’s song The Last Stand?

The song would fit beautifully! I, unfortunately, do not know how to make one 😔

Harry Potter and Pinterest at 1:30 in the morning had me laughing like a lunatic. After sleeping, this is still funny.

the nightblood family we deserved

(Art Creds - @papurrcat )

Because Tyrion is weirdly fascinated by direwolves

 Tyrion: if you had to separate your direwolf from 49 other identical direwolves that were all equally excited to see you, how would you determine which direwolf was yours?

Bran: I would know it in my bones. Him and I are one.

*

Tyrion: if you had to separate your direwolf from 49 other identical direwolves that were all equally excited to see you, how would you determine which  direwolf was yours?

Sansa: Ok, so that was just harsh and-

Tyrion: Oh fuck. I completely-

*

Tyrion: if you had to separate your direwolf from 49 other identical  direwolves that were all equally excited to see you, how would you determine which direwolf was yours?

Rickon: *has been ignoring him for this entire conversation. Tyrion will never receive a reply*

*

Tyrion: if you had to separate your direwolf from 49 other identical direwolves that were all equally excited to see you, how would you determine which direwolf was yours?

Jon: No direwolf can brood like my direwolf. *Looks out the window and broods about it*

*

Tyrion: if you had to separate your direwolf from 49 other identical direwolves that were all equally excited to see you, how would you determine which direwolf was yours?

Arya:*flips hair* i would take my 50 direwolves home and live like a queen. I’d trust Nymeria would have made herself the alpha by then.

Tyrion:

Tyrion: I didn’t make this a competition but she just won… somehow