Uarmygguk

thinking of starting a series of little posts where i talk about certain details in my fics that i intended to add— wanna call it ‘nin’s nuances’ or something— food for thought 💭

𓂁 ☼♒︎ moodboard 𓇼 MILES FROM HOME 𓇼 lıllılı.ıllı.ılılıı tides— blacktop ver.

images, pinterest teaser, here note, this is how i visualize the entire setting, you could picture it in any way though— also couldn't find much of the 'Jeju' vibes i wanted to. love diaries music rec,

i think gnarly is growing on me too 😧

why tf did i js make an entire crack au rn 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

this shit wild

hmm i kinda like making smaus ngl

not me trying to finally clean my room but ending up making playlists and suddenly it’s been 30 mins

a single typo literally has the explosive power of a nuclear bomb like i just read back possibly the most beautiful scene ive ever created feeling so proud of myself ready to start thinking about the nobel prize in literature etc. etc. and then suddenly

“It’s oaky,” he whispered.

it’s oaky. what is this. a wine tasting

idk why i'm aching to post back to you, but the amount of times i revisit and edit it is insane.

tell me why it went from 6.4k -> 6.7k???????

NO ONE, BUT YOU ⋆ 전정국

. . . . KISS ME, dangerous. been so lost without you all around me . . .

pairing, jungkook x model f!reader tags/warnings, little suggestive/allusion to smut, fwb2l, not too plot heavy js vibes lol note, slightly edited version of one of my drafts while i work on other longer wips <3 taglist, @ggukivrse @bangatanily | click here to join taglist! love diaries music rec, "Shirt"— SZA

feedback is appreciated! xx

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

"Hold my hand in secret and kiss me when no one's looking."

Eyes skimming around the sky now felt like a burden, you just wanted to give up and collapse, finally, onto the couch or the ground would even do— for how you felt like a human wrapped in a cyclone, world feeling dizzy as fuck.

There behind, as the only source of light apart from the moon ablaze —an otherwise fluttering sight to drink in, if it weren't for the current scenario— lay your phone, chats blowing up like gushing water following a drought.

Him, Jungkook, is your best friend but with benefits. A mutual help was what you agreed upon but eventually it became really hard for your heart to continue to bottle up the feelings growing in, with each touch, each caress and each contact. Skin to skin.

Walking up towards the little table across the balcony, you pick up your phone, scanning the texts you just received from Jungkook. How he portrayed all the words, you couldn't believe he was feeling so. 

Reciprocated. 

Your love was bound back in all means from his fucking heart. Jeon Jungkook's heart. 

Days ago, you were shattered by what he asked for, after you had your timbers shivering and knees clamping in all seriousness of the confession he presented before you.

Everything seemed to wash into your mind all at once, making things twice as hard. Tossing the gadget away, landing safe on the couch, his chat was still open. You took yourself into your well-kept bedroom, for a cup of water so that every piece of information, each adversity and ecstasy would sink in thoroughly.

"Hold my hand in secret and kiss me when no one's looking."

These couple of words echoed to and fro inside your tight heart, remembering when this was part of the "contract" / help you were lending to each other. He needed you, but was scared of society. A shit ton of insecurities ate him up alive each time, when he thought about how he'll be judged to be "using" you, the daughter of a revered model in South Korea. 

But all you know is, you love him for good. You'd never regret being his friend and now, someone he loves. Society has clamped a huge pressuring weight on each one’s shoulder. Sometimes it is the constant nagging to remain perfect. Sometimes it's how you're not perfect / likable. 

You don't give two hoots about the media, your "famous" family and your friends who go blind at shiny things. You'd gave no fucks about big and bold in the community. If you got the chance now, like right now, it'll be you on one knee with an imperfectly perfect paper ring, proposing to someone who already has your heart wrapped around in his strong fists. 

"Oh, Jeon. You make me fucking crazy." You whisper, now, admiring the sky feels less a burden, that heart of yours somehow eased into peace.

She flipped, landed and spun in circles every time he touched you. Everytime his fingers came in contact with the one tiny tattoo resting on top of the skin right next to your sternum. Everytime he kissed you there and traced it with his tongue.

Funny how you address your heart as if it was a person, right? It is. Now, she has safely landed upon something, hilarious much, again how she found peace, her world in the chaos.

"Can I take her for a ride then?" You jumped at the sudden cameo of a familiar raspy voice. Yes. That's it. It's the very voice you longed to hear, even after all the confusion and frustration. 

"Jungkook.." Oh. So you've been thinking out loud. Not embarrassing at all.

"Are you gonna let me in or should I stay hanging on your balcony?" He tightens the grip around the railing, trying to stay intact.

"Shit, sorry." You finally move, grabbing his wrists, surely not helping much as he pulls up and jumps over, hands landing taut around your waist as soon as he's on ground-level.

His eyes roam around yours, spewing a thousand words through its gaze.

And her. Your heart.

She was absolutely down. Damn much.

Toppling over and crash landing in the walls trying to break out and finally run into his heart.

"Calm down you stupid little organ. I'm not affected. No, not one bit." 

You ironically smiled at him, as he raised a brow at you. Amusement written across his annoyingly good looking face.

"Stop."

"You're making me feel, Han." He spat, fierce and quiet.

"Stop this, or I might lose myself. And I'm fucking not taking myself back. Ever."

You exhaled, the anxiety slowly waving goodbye. He's playing.

"Is that so? Then hold my hand and make me yours as the world witnesses us, Jungkook. I know for a fact that nothing can change now. It’s now, or never." Both of you were deprived. It's been days since you saw him after the controversy that arose along with a few pictures of you spending time with him, all around social media.

It immediately sent your mind to overdrive, already seeing an end to the 6 month long arrangement.

But more than that, the years long friendship you shared with this man standing in front of you.

However, his eyes swam over yours, alerting you that he doesn't give a fuck. None about the media, none about your background.

He scoffs, leaning in. "The problem is,," 

He does that, for the first time in ages. He holds your chin to face him, like he used to do, back then. Now there's different emotions mixed in, with all the lust.

Love. 

"If I kissed you, now and here, I'd not be able to stop. Don't fucking expect me to."

And there, his lips fall on yours, like a missing puzzle, skin hot against each other as he eventually picks you up in the process, and puts you down, towering over once again.

The gates of hell opened once more, as he pressed open mouthed kisses next to the v-line of your body-con, on the tattoo.

He wanted your body, pressed up against his heart.  Your hands, spreading his thoughts. Gripping your love, hope and desires, cupping them with nothing but passion. Fire. You felt his soul breathing heavily against your collarbones. You felt him nibble all the un uttered thoughts onto your ears. His hopes, naked on your skin. You needed each other. In a way unexplainable for eternities to come.

" . . . I SEE MY REFLECTION in your eyes . . . "

brief, in which you're both graduating together starring, the honorable bsf2l (?) trope words, 1.5k tags/warnings, none! i got inspired from a reel, and here we are almost an hour later, so not proof read!! (which also explains the lack of a proper header but im just a girl <3) love diaries music rec, "reflections" — the neighborhood, "get you" — daniel caesar

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“you’re not wearing that tie, jeon! go put on the one mom bought.” you scramble around the house, feet thudding against the soft wooden floors— almost imitating your panicked state.

12.15 pm. and two more hours till you enter a new phase of life, graduate from college and move on.

shuffling through the drawers lined on your shared dorm with him, eyes darting to every possible corner, but in vain.

plopping down on the softness of his bed, you huff in exasperation, because this can’t be happening. 

not at the eleventh hour.

the sheets crinkle, slight rustle pronounced through the air-conditioned room, making you turn around to blabber even more complaints into his ears.

but those get swallowed into a whirl, fades away as your best friend, suitemate and something like a childhood partner in shenanigans? the one who you shared toys with begrudgingly at the constant nag of your respective parents and many things you couldn’t cohere at the moment.

really.

wholly out of the usual hoodie situation that didn’t seem to do justice to his dedicated hours at the gym, Jungkook is knelt down, clad in a midnight black tuxedo that you swear was non-existent in his list of clothes that enunciated his features better, in fact he’s never looked like this. the last time was probably on prom day, while another girl clung onto his arms throughout the evening, without letting go.

who would?

your analysis comes to an abrupt end, like those unfinished projects that lay, calm and quiet in Adobe Premiere Pro, because being film majors, it was inevitable.

however that’s not the point.

the matter of concern is how after looking like a character straight out of some rom-com, he sits next to you, adjusting his toe socks.

iron man toe socks.

“are you wearing those to a literal graduation party?” your query comes out, but it’s laced with a not so graceful laugh, a snort coming out after to just complete it.

“you’re not exactly being subtle, __.” unbeknownst to your inner battle, he looks up with slightly wide eyes screaming at you for offending the priceless possession.

“y’know what, i’ll personally buy you some real pair of socks because that,” you point to his feet from which a comical iron-man glared at you. “cannot even be categorized as one.” 

“i know, but this makes me feel at home, you wouldn’t understand a man’s pain.” he dramatically sighs, “if you don’t wanna be my date you could just say that.” those words came out gentler, and even though you knew it was a silly banter, his eyebrows contorting in contemplation defied your thoughts.

“you think i wouldn’t come with you for grad just because of a sock?” you tsk, trying to loosen up the atmosphere that held something unsaid, a little heavier.

but he remained quiet, adjusting the sleeves of the tux to his reflection in the mirror.

several minutes passed with a charged silence.

he was your day one. enrolling in film school wasn’t exactly what your family supported, but Jungkook whipped up an entire presentation— that spanned from your mindless doodles on the blank pages of his science textbook to a whole graphics scheme you created with nothing but cheap, free software and a dream— meeting up with the both of your parents to put forth a pros and cons list. he cleverly snuck in his similar wish of going to college with you, which will probably be the only fact that elevated the chances, landing you here. 

with Jungkook, about to be recognized as accomplished graduates, with impressive portfolios to name.

he knows you better.

best.

you move, finally, rounding the corner to get closer to the dressing table as Jungkook added a spritz of cologne to his neck, a few drops grazing your black silk, front slit dress laced with a floral assemblage at the cleavage.

now his scent was bound to stay for the rest of the evening.

but this time, you don’t complain.

instead, you extend your hands forward, that proudly clasped a red, furry box, golden letters engraved on the centre. 

“Dior?” he examines the box, voice still wrapped around with weight, slowly opening it.

“what the fuck, you found it!” he exclaims, forgetting about the feud, turning around immediately to scoop you in his arms, his hold.

bleu de chanel. on him, now on you too.

the cologne mixed with the heavenly combination of his body wash that you always tried to get your hands on, now sticks onto you. clings like it’s got tentacles, hooking in.

you sigh into his neck, that elicits visible goosebumps on his  skin, laughing lightly as his fingers lazily traces the slit of your dress.

two centimeters. hypothetically if his fingers linger a bit more, and move towards the right, it would be met with the smooth expanse of your exposed thigh.

nevertheless it remains on the silk, outlining the light pink flowers embroidered on them.

“you found this, so i’ll forgive you for insulting my socks.” he whispers into your ears, ever so carefully like he’ll break the moment, if anything.

“Kook?” you call out, his response almost instantly vibrating with a soft hum to your senses.

“you’re too obvious. i know you’d wanna wear the matching tie i disagreed on. isn’t that why you made such a fuss, hm?” you knew he could sense your understanding from the tone.

caught red handed.

Jungkook comes up, slyly grinning at you through his doe eyes, plump lips following suit.

“you were just too adamant on not wanting to match! why would i wear the one mom bought, if i already have another one” he justifies, but you just shake your head, hands folding at the chest.

“it’d look corny with your all black suit, i was just being considerate of your fashion, but if you don’t wanna be, sure.” you shrug, but he just comes behind, tightening the emory green tie, with bold flowers patched onto it, totally not aligning with his tuxedo.

his arms wrap around your shoulders, hands bringing the flimsy material of the tie forward, placing it on your chest, closer to the flowery lace right next to the neckline of your dress.

“the whole point of a date is to match, __.”

you just stare at his eyes through the mirror, and then at your reflection.

and just relax into his arms.

___

“congrats, babyyyy!” jina, classmate and project partner, hugs you from the side, putting the nth garland around you, and pushing a gift onto your already filled hands as she struts, pulling Jungkook’s hand to get his attention.

he turned to one side, talking to your parents and clicking a few pictures of you little sister for her social media.

his focus shifts to you, and a smiley jina who just wanted her pictures taken, before meeting someone else.

“Kook! quick, she has to go.” you rush, his skin gleaming under the beaming May sun.

You pose, as he captures the moments on his ever-cherished camera, approving the shots with a thumbs-up.

“see you soon, girl” jina offers you a hug once again, and leaves in a flash to join the others.

“hey, __. look at me.” he adjusts the camera hanging on his shoulders, the backyard almost empty again, as everyone heads to the after party.

“we don’t have time, let’s go, come on.” you nudge on his hands, but he just

stays.

“i wanna take a photo.”

huh? you took 100s with him, worth all the storage your iCloud could stand.

he remains firm, tugging all the gifts and miscellaneous things from your hold, laying it safely on the grass behind.

this must be one of his antics, to just save time from socialising 

you give in anyway, setting your long brown locks to cascade behind your back, running down to your waist.

Jungkook seemed to fall back for a beat, staring at your figure before slowly bringing the camera to focus.

you expect a countdown to three maybe, conventional, the old style of “1,2,3 say cheese!”

basics of photography, 101.

“i love you.” he knocks you out of breath. 

three words, just not the ones you saw coming.

unexpected, unfiltered, pure confession.

nonetheless, you smile wide at the lenses of the Canon camera that flickered in front of your eyes. 

happier than ever.

you wish, that would’ve given him the answer he seeked for.

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writers block hitting so hard its gotten me staring at the doc like this since the last 30 mins.