Grinding On My Best Friend In A Totally Straight Way

freak in the sheets as well as in most other locations

he's asking if he can hold ur shoulder boulders

6/9/25

are you new here or something?? hannah is a terrible person

I actually am fairly new!! But from what I have seen of Hannah, she is incredibly sweet. Also, her and Sam have been in a loving relationship for years, and I don't believe Sam would be with her if she was some terrible awful person. 🫶

WERE SO BACK

Relief | Josh Kiszka

Word count: 2239

Warnings: 18+, This shit is freak nasty, minors begone! Pissplay, m!sub, spanking, boot riding, general smut stuff idk man????

A/N: This is a re-upload of a fic I took down a while ago on another blog! Also, I understand content like this is not everyone's cup of tea, and that's okay! No one is forcing you to read it!

The last few songs of the show were a blur for Josh. He played things cool, but behind all the waving and blowing kisses to the crowd, the only thing he could focus on was the growing ache in his bladder. As the boys took their final bow and exited the stage, he pushed past everyone, desperately trying to make it to his dressing room bathroom to relieve himself. 

He practically burst through the door, startling you as you scanned the frantic look on his face. “Love, what’s wrong?” You questioned, standing up from the couch and placing a gentle hand on his cheek. 

“Nothing nothing I just- fuck can we save this Y/N?” He scrambled through his words. “I really have to take a leak.” 

You couldn’t help the smirk that grew on your face at his words. At this point he was whining instead of speaking. Looking down, you could see his legs clenched together, almost trembling as he stood in front of you. 

You snaked your hand down from his face, to his chest, and you finally landed on his crotch. Josh let out a shaky breath at the contact alone. You rested there, cupping his clothed length in the palm of your hand.

“Fuck baby..” He moaned, “Please just let me go. I promise I’ll make you feel so good after I’m done.” You chuckled at his attempt to stay in control of the situation. 

“What’s the fun in that?” You tilted your head, giving him a look of faux pity as you pulled your hand away and sat back down onto the couch. “Strip for me, lovely. Wouldn’t wanna ruin that pretty jumpsuit of yours would we?” 

It was pathetic how fast he slipped it off and tossed it over the chair in front of the vanity. Now that you had a clear view, you could see just how hard he was. His cock looked painfully flushed. You made eye contact with him, silently pointing to the floor in front of you. He protested at first, letting out a huff, but ultimately he obeyed. 

You leaned forward, ruffling his curls and watching intently as he leaned into the touch. “My good boy. Keep behaving and you’ll get what you need, yeah?” 

He nodded eagerly at your words. “Yesyesyess” He trailed on breathlessly, “I’ll be so good for you I promise I-“ Josh shut up abruptly when he felt you give him a light nudge with your boot, and he couldn’t stop his hips from bucking at the contact. 

“What? You gonna get off on my boot? Hump it like a bitch in heat? Gonna make a mess sweetheart?” That must’ve struck a nerve, because as soon as the words left your mouth Josh all but pounced onto your shoe, desperately grinding against the cool leather for any relief he could get. His head fell back after a few moments as he reveled in the pleasure. Soft moans slipped off his tongue, sweet like honey, but laced with a need that lacked any sort of innocence. The ache in his bladder was still very much prevalent, though now it was mixed with another feeling bubbling inside of him, and that made it all the more painful. 

A few minutes passed of you just admiring him, enjoying the show he was putting on. He was covered in a thin layer of sweat that made a few stray hairs stick to his forehead. The way his Adam’s apple bobbed when he gulped or whimpered had you in a momentary trance. A particularly high pitched whine brought you back to reality. He must’ve found a good angle because the soft sounds quickly evolved into strained, loud cries. You could see tears forming in the corners of his eyes, ruining his eyeliner when they dropped from his waterline and ran down his flushed cheeks. 

“My sweet boy..” You cooed, “I wish you could see how pathetic you look right now. I almost feel sorry for you.” Without warning you grabbed his chin and forced him to look at you. Giving him no time to react, you raised your hand and delivered a smack to the side of his face, earning a choked whimper on his end. It wasn’t hard enough to leave a mark, but definitely hard enough to sting for a bit. You gently soothed the spot with your thumb. “Color?” 

“Green- oh fuck fuck..” He panted as he let his head fall forward. “Please..fuck please I’m so close I need to-“ 

“Need to what? Come on, can you use your words for me?” You knew exactly what he wanted, no needed, but Josh had to say it himself. You raised your boot slightly and pushed against his bladder. The action had him folding in on himself, his legs quickly snapping together in an attempt to keep himself at bay. 

“Need to come..and and..fuck I need to piss babe- please??” 

“Up.” You said, motioning with your hand. While he stood up you made quick time of discarding your shirt and jeans. As much as you would’ve loved to let him make a mess of your clothes, you didn’t have anything else to change into when the two of you left later, so discarding them was the best option for now. 

You relaxed against the couch once more, gently pulling him onto your lap. Instantly his hands were all over you as he tried to coax any sort of sympathy he could get out of you. “Careful, I only said I’d give you what you want if you behave.” His touches became more gentle after that, slower and less frantic. You reached your hand down, wrapping it around his length. A barely stifled moan tore through him. He was putty in your hands. He always melted under your touch, and you absolutely loved the power you held over him. You began to move your hand, slowly at first. Then gradually worked him up to a good pace. 

It wasn’t long before he was crying again. His whines became incoherent mumbles, and you had to physically hold his hips down. “Are you close? Wanna let go for me, darling?” 

He nodded, or at least tried to. He was so far gone that it was more so just him twitching his head slightly. You leaned forward and planted a few kisses up his neck, and a final one just below his ear. Safe where no one would find it. “Come on doll, let go for me.” You whispered. 

What followed your words was pornographic. Josh’s head flew back as he screamed your name. The white stripes of his release painted your hand as well as both of your tummies. He twitched in your lap, engulfed in ecstasy. After a moment he began to come down from his high. His cock softened slightly, but you didn’t stop pumping him. You knew he wasn’t done, and so did he, but it was embarrassing to admit. You used your free hand to trail down his torso, stopping just above his bladder. Josh shuttered when after a moment, he felt you press down more roughly than before. 

“Fuck I can’t- hold it much longer.” 

“Shhhh,” You whispered, “give it to me sweet boy.” You removed your hand from his torso and reached down to pleasure yourself. He let out a broken cry, it hurt, but it felt so damn good to finally get the relief he had been chasing. The initial warmth of it had you throwing your own head back, resting on the back of the couch. You were both moaning in unison at this point as the stream continued. It covered his thighs first, then yours, some even dripped down between your legs. You heard it come to a stop before you felt it, and the whole scene had your head spinning. It was intoxicating. After a few more labored breaths from the both of you, you finally made eye contact again. His cheeks were somehow an even darker shade of red than before, and his mouth hung open in a way that perfectly showed off his soft, plump lips.  

“That was-“ You began, but before you could finish the sentence you felt something poking against your tummy. You looked down and let out a coo “Aww, you already hard again love? Not finished yet?” You teased. 

“We don’t have to, I can take care of it myself if you want.” 

“Nonsense. I’ve got something in mind, baby. Don’t you worry.” You leaned forward, pressing your lips to his, taking in what you could of the soft moment before what was to come. He pulled away first, breathless and panting. “Can you stand up for me, sugar?” He complied, albeit slowly. You let out a giggle at his struggling, but eventually he was up. You stood up after him, the feeling of him running down your legs was enough to make you falter for a moment.

You took his hand and led him over to the vanity, pushing the chair with his jumpsuit on it carefully out of the way. You gently placed your hand on the small of his back and rested it there for a moment before raising it up and pushing so that Josh was now bent over and on display. “You look so pretty, don’t you think?” Without warning you tangled your fingers in his curls and yanked his head back. “You’re gonna watch yourself, okay? You’re gonna take what I give you, and if I catch you looking away this all stops and I’m leaving you on your own. Got it?” 

He let out a shaky breath and nodded as he made eye contact with you through the mirror. “Good boy.” You praised. Your hands naturally found themselves on his ass, kneading at the soft flesh. “Ready?” He whispered a small ‘yes’, and that was enough for you. You raised your hand up, and within seconds it was making contact with his skin again. The sound cracked and echoed throughout the dressing room. “Count.” You said.

“One.” He whined, the tears already starting to form in the corners of his eyes again. You gave him little time to recover before continuing with another spank. 

“Fuck- two!” He cried out.

The two of you continued like that until you got to 14. He was painfully hard, precum coating his fingers as he pumped himself under the desk. You were going to protest, but he had been good. The least you could do was let him touch himself. “You close baby? Can you give me one more?” He nodded eagerly, his legs starting to shake as he struggled to hold himself back. You nodded back to him, taking in a breath before landing a final spank on his ass. 

“Oh god- fifteen!” Moaned Josh, holding out the ‘ee’ sound. With that he was toppling over himself, finally slipping over the edge as the ribbons of his release painted his fingers. You held him there, careful not to let him fall as you rubbed soft, soothing circles into his skin. After he caught his breath you slowly turned him around, raising his hips up a bit so he was now sitting on the vanity. 

“You did so good angel..” You whispered, “I’m so so proud of you.” You trailed gentle kisses from his forehead, to his cheeks, and finally a soft peck on the lips. “I wasn’t too rough was I?” He smiled at you and shook his head, and you nodded in response. “Okay love, how about we go get you cleaned up? Then we can go back to the hotel and curl up in bed.”

You walked him carefully to the bathroom of his dressing room, which luckily had a decent sized shower. You stepped forward to turn on the water, making sure it wasn’t too hot. You both liked it a bit on the cooler side, especially considering how hot and stuffy it had been in the dressing room. You were the first to get in so that you could help him stay steady as he got in as well. Your hands gently snaked around his waist, holding him there as the water ran over both of you. 

“I love you.” He said, his voice cutting through the white noise of the water. 

“I love you more.” You replied. 

“Impossible.”

You both washed each other, leaning into the touch of the other when they were doing your hair or scrubbing your skin. It wasn’t long before you were done, and you both stepped out of the shower. You dried off and fetched your clothes from where you’d thrown them earlier. Josh grabbed his ‘normal clothes’ from his bag and changed with you. He carefully hung his jumpsuit up to be collected by the crew later. He grabbed his belonging, as did you, and before you knew it you both were making your way to his car.

The air outside was cool and refreshing. “Am I driving?” He asked. 

“Of course not. I’m not gonna make you drive after all that. You’re way too tired.” 

He protested, but switched sides with you and allowed you to hop in behind the wheel for the short drive to the hotel. “I would’ve been fine, you really didn’t have to..” He trailed on.

Josh was out cold and snoring before you even got out of the parking lot.

I need to hear josh belting some show tunes ik that freak loves falsettos

picking his boogers

Feels Like Gold

Jake Kiszka x AFAB/GN reader

18+

Warnings: graphic sexual content, oral sex (both rec), penatrative sex, swearing, alcohol use, chris appearance (he needs his own warning), etc.

Word count: 1.9k

Ok so I've never written fanfiction BUT I really wanted some pirate jakey, so little summary is you've been 'disguised' as a man on his ship for a year and your captain is drunk, horny, and desperate ermmm yeah yay!

~

The year is 1689, you are disguised as a man, working as a deckhand on 'The Golden Fleet'.

The captain, Jacob Thomas, as any captain is, or at least should be, was ruthless. At the time, he is one of the most feared pirates of the seven seas. You have watched this man battle the greatest, he pulled a sword on fucking Blackbeard, the man beat guns with a fucking sword!

For the most part, the crew was scared of him, and reasonably so. No one dare disobey his orders or commands, no matter how insane, lest they want their head chopped off.

Despite all of this, you had taken a strange interest in him. Maybe even a liking. For a filthy, drunken pirate, he was surprisingly gorgeous. His eyes were entrancing, dark and deep, holding grotesque secrets of the sea. His skin was rough and tan from days in the sun on the water, working and commanding. His clothes were dark, worn down. Occasionally, he would steal new things when the ship stopped at ports. Silken shirts and nice leathers, but he usually just wore the same things till they fell apart. Over time you had taken a fondness to him, and it seems, he to you.

~

Usually, every few weeks, the ship would stop for a day at a port, not for the crews leisure, but for the captains. He needed his….fixes. He would disappear for the entire time, off with groups of maidens, whores, and when he returned, he would be in a much better mood. At the moment though, you were too far out at sea to stop. It had been around 4 months, and the men were starting to get desperate. Your captain, in particular, had been in a horrible mood. Far more angry than usual, screaming at the crew, and staying cooped up in his quarters, soaked in booze.

It was extraordinarly late at night, the moon was high, the ship was rocking with the waves and wind. You were lying awake in your makeshift bed, unable to sleep. Suddenly, you were approached by Chris, the first mate. He was standing above you. He nudged you with his boot to get your attention. "The captain wishes to see you..in his quarters." He gave you a little smile before disappearing.

You quietly make your way to Jacob's door, deep within the ship, away from the crew. He liked his privacy. You knock quietly at the worn down wood, and his voice bellows out, slurred. "Come in."

You carefully open the door, and you are met with a sight that makes your cunt weep. Jacob sits in an old chair, his legs spread open, his head hung down. His shirt was popped open,  all but the last 2 buttons undone. He had a painfully obvious erection, prominent under the leather of his pants. His fingers on one side were curled around the neck of an almost-empty bottle of rum. His long hair had fallen in front of his face, and he peered up at you through it. "Birdie..c'mere" He said, beckoning you forward with his free hand.

Bird. The nickname he had bestowed upon you, when, on your first day on his ship, a seagull shit on your head. He had watched you struggle to wash it out, teasing you the entire time for it. A week later, the same happened to him, and he claims you cursed him.

You awkwardly made your way over to him until you stood between his legs. He slowly tilted his head back to look at you, taking in your features for a moment. His voice comes out low and raspy.

"Kneel."

You hesitate for a moment, frozen by shock. He couldn't be serious? You are quickly corrected that he is, when his eyebrows furrow angrily, and he raises his voice ever so slightly.

"You heard me. Kneel. Obey your Captain."

Not wanting to risk pissing him off any further, you immediately drop to your knees before him. He grins at that.

"There you go. Good." And with that, his free hand is buried in your hair, roughly shoving you forward until your nose is pressed against his crotch. You look up at him wide eyed for a moment, before relaxing a little into it, gently mouthing at him through the leather.

He groans. "Y'know what I want"

He fumbles with the button of his pants until it pops open, shoving them down his thighs until his cock springs free. He's incredibly hard, dripping with precum. This close you can smell him, every little scent, mixed together, making your head swim. It's musky. Sweat, salt, cigar smoke, booze, leather, dust, and something you can't quite place.

"C'mon, little birdie…love on my cock, won't you?"

Tentatively, you lick a long stripe up the underside of it before placing a little kiss on the tip. He takes another swig of his booze, his eyes locked on yours. He lets out a shuddering breath when you suck the head into your mouth.

He rolls his hips up and shoves your head down, forcing himself down your throat, groaning in pleasure when you swallow around him. "Fuck.." The word trembles out of him. "Natural, aren't you? You do this for the rest of the crew?"

You quickly shake your head no, and he grins, chuckling softly. Holding you by the hair, he bucks his hips up again, fucking into your mouth. He sighs. "Don't make me do all the work."

Slowly, you bob your head up and down along him, sucking and lapping at him lightly. His head falls back against the chair. Uncontrolled, slurred moans and curses spilled from his lips. You pick up the pace, hands grabbing at his thighs, his moans getting louder.

His hips stutter up, and that is the only warning you get before your mouth is filled with his release. He leans forward, his fingers digging into your hair as he moans breathlessly, writhing a bit, nearly dropping the rum bottle. After a moment he slowly pulls you off but grabs your chin, shoving your mouth shut, forcing you to swallow. He smirks when you do.

"There. Thanks, bird."

His calloused fingers cup your cheek for just a moment, running his thumb over your bottom lip, swiping away the saliva and cum left there. After a minute, he rises from his chair, setting the bottle down, he stumbles over to his bed. "Well, come on, then. I won't wait all night."

You scramble to your feet and over to his bed. He reaches over and grabs you by the shirt, throwing you down on to the bed with a little thud. His was much more comfortable than your own. His fingers hook under the edge of the shirt and pull it upwards. "Cap'n-" You gasp out, but it was too late.

He stares down at the cloth tied tightly around your chest curiously, one of his eyebrows quirked up in question. You look up at him, wide eyed and fearful. He runs a hand across it, and when you don't wince in pain, his curiosity grows ever stronger.

You struggle to form an answer, just looking up at him. "What- why?-" Jacob says softly, confused. His fingers find one end of the fabric and he unwraps it, pulling it off of your body. You turn your head away, hiding your face as you tremble beneath him, horrified.

"Oh, bird…." He looks at you in awe as he realizes. His hands run across your chest, squeezing lightly. After a minute he speaks quietly. "..'M not gonna kick you off the ship. Well, with a deal. You stay open to me, let me have you whenever I please, and this stays our little secret, Al-right?"

You nod quickly. "Yes- yes- anything you want, Captain." You say quickly, still shaking with the shock of it all. His hands slip down your stomach to your pants, unbuttoning them and tugging them down and entirely off of you. He shoves your thighs open and dips his head down.

He groans at the sight of your soaked cunt. Without a thought to it, he pressed his face against you, inhaling deeply as his nose brushed against you, his tongue delving inside.

He almost whines at the taste of you. It makes you cry out, your back arching up off the bed. His nails dig into your hips, holding you down as he lapped at you like he was a starved man, and your cunt was his very favorite meal.

He continues this for a few minutes, bringing you right to the edge. And when he knows you are about to release, he stops, grinning as he watches you struggle in frustration.

He lifts his head up, and, Gods, was he a sight. His eyes hazy, his hair a mess, his lips, shaded pinker than usual from kissing and sucking at you, and the best, his entire chin, lips, some of his cheeks, and the tip of his nose glistened with your slick.

He gets up to kick off his own pants, and abandon his shirt. You drink in the sight of his naked form, the only thing left being his jewelry. Doubloons that dangled from his neck. Carefully crafted, and carefully stolen rings of silver adorning his hands, and the hoop earrings that you got a glimpse of every so often when he pushed his hair back.

He climbed back atop of you, kneeled between your thighs. He pushed your legs up, one of his hands gripping the back of one of your thighs, the other, wrapped around the base of his cock. He gave himself a few quick strokes before pulling you up by the hips and lining himself up, letting his tip graze against you.

With one push, he was buried completely inside of you. His head fell forward, giving a loud groan, almost a growl. He stilled for a moment so you both could adjust to the feeling, before beginning to slowly rock his hips, starting out in time with the ship. He was fucking you in time with the waves. What a man.

"Fuck, you really are a little bird. Singing so pretty for me…"

The mixture of both yours and his moans fill the small room. His fingers had a grip on your hips that you knew would leave a bruise by sunrise. He sped up his movements, grunting through gritted teeth.

You could feel yourself quickly getting close again, and, by the sloppiness of his movements, it seems Jacob was too. You scramble to hold on to him, nails digging into his shoulders. He snarls, pounding into you roughly. "Come on. Fuckin do it!" He growls out the words lowly.

And with that, you felt the coil deep in your stomach release, crying out as the waves of pleasure washed over and through you, making you tremble. He was close behind you, giving a final thrust before spilling inside of you, his mouth open, his head hanging back.

You both were panting as you came down from your highs. After a moment, he slowly pulled out, making you whine. He smirked as he watched his cum dripping out of your cunt. "What a mess." He sighed, but had no intention of cleaning it up.

He climbed out of bed, retrieving his booze, and tossing a scrap handkerchief at you, letting you wipe yourself off. After taking a long drink of rum, he flopped back down on the bed and threw one arm over you, cuddled up close.

"Thanks, birdie."

PLEASE ILL ACTUALLY DIE

i might have to write a cowboy josh fic after jakes fic cause of this photo

am I losing my mind or do they have matching necklaces. do yall see this.

In the darkness way below, it's my heart he'll keep

Josh Kiszka x GN reader

so I've been thinking about Siren Josh quite a bit so here's a little like ficlet of that :3

Word Count: 956

~

The sun is slowly setting on the horizon, disappearing behind the water. Water is all you can see, in any direction. You are a merchant, far out on a wooden raft, you have crates with enough food and water to hopefully get you through till you arrive in England. Most importantly though, is the boxes upon boxes of jewels. Diamonds and rubies, pretty necklaces and rings. You have been out at sea for exactly 2 months now, and were growing incredibly bored.

Thankfully, the waves were calm tonight, only a gentle breeze in your sail. You sat in the center of your raft, scaling a fish with your pocket knife, quietly humming to yourself a tune from long ago.

The moon hung full and bright in the sky, stars glittering among the empty indigo. That was one of the things you did love about this job, the view of the sky. As you are taking it in, you spot a movement in the water out of the corner of your eye. A shark? Dolphin? No, bigger. You stand up, knife clutched tightly in one hand, glancing around, trying to spot whatever it was again.

A note rings out into the air. Clear and high. A singular voice, filling the vast emptiness of the night. Were you going crazy? There was no one else out this far, and you couldn't identify where the sound was coming from. The noise surrounded you in a way, filling your head.

Again, the voice sings out. This time a series of notes. It was like nothing you had ever heard before. Now, it sounds more like the voice is behind you. You quickly turn around, only to see nothing but the ocean.

You hear a swish of water, something moving. Once again, sound echoes into the air, long, sustained. You slowly turn around, and you can just barely see hands, gripping the end of the raft. Then, up comes eyes, peering at you curiously. They practically glowed. You stumbled back in horror.

The creature raises an eyebrow and laughs softly at you. It lifts up so you could now see the head and chest, of what seems to be the most beautiful human you've ever layed eyes upon. He has dark curls, damp and pushed back out of his face, the sides shaven clean. Water droplets roll off of his skin, which looked as though it was made of porcelain. Not a single visible blemish. He had a little goatee, also dripping with the ocean. His eyes are what you drew you in the most, though. They were big and sweet, from how he appears. Welcoming browns surrounded by crystal white, but as he focused on you, his pupils narrowed into slits, the brown fading a bit. His lips were upturned in a little smile.

"Who are you?…" You manage out, your voice shaking against your will.

"Does it matter?" He responds. His voice is surprisingly raspy, not quite deep, but not as high as he sang.

"..Do you have a name?-" You question him, taking a little step forward, your knife held out in front of you.

"Joshua." The name was shockingly human, but there was no way in hell he was.

As you take a step closer, you are able to see him clearer. He is wearing lots of gold. A pendant dangles from his neck, shaped like the sun. Multiple earrings line his ears. Gold hoops wrap around his wrists, some sliding lower down his forearms. Rings of different shapes on every finger, foreign symbols you couldn't identify. He tilts his head slightly.

You have so many questions, yet all of the words are lost from you, caught in your throat, never uttered. He gives you a soft, gentle look before he begins to sing again, this time words, but it hardly mattered.

"Crash against wave upon wave, whoa-oh In strange horizons, ooh. Heel to the mist and the wind, yeah-yeah You make the movement, ooh"

You find yourself being drawn in to this. Slowly, you stumble forward, it felt like your feet were moving on their own. You drop your knife, it clatters against the wood, but you pay no attention to it. The creature reaches its hands out to you.

"Sail to the end of the world, whoa-oh For death or glory, ooh Bow with your face to the sky, yeah-yeah We are the movement, ooh"

You fall to your knees in front of him, and he cups your face in his hands, his nails ever lightly dig into the flesh, but you don't notice. Totally entranced by this voice, this thing that has found you.

He begins slowly pulling you downwards, still vocalizing. You let it happen, leaning forward, wanting to be closer, something in you urged to kiss him, longed for the connection. He smiles as he sinks down under the water, his eyes locked on yours. As his mouth opens, you can see his teeth are pointed into sharp fangs, his eyes narrowing even more.

Just as you get close enough, your nose touching the water, he drags you down. Claw like nails dig into your cheeks, you try to scream, but your mouth is filled with water. Salt fills you lungs as he pulls you to the deep. He lets you go and you sink down, left to rot in the pit of the empty sea.

~

The sun beats down brightly on your face. You awake on your raft, perfectly dry, perfectly unharmed. You sit up, looking around, confused. Was it all a dream? Everything is seemingly normal..

..Yet, every box of jewelry has disappeared, and you notice, clutched tightly in the palm of your hand is a singular golden scale.