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Dottore with short drabble “You only ever brought me pain and I’m sick of it.”

Something angsty pls? Thank you!

Tainted Glass [Dottore x Reader/Genshin Impact]

Synopsis: Can you escape the prison you made?

(A twisted Cinderella story. The girl was covered in cinders because she was fatally addicted to drowning in flames.)

Warnings: angst, emotional abuse, violence, death

(A/n): To be honest anon, I didn’t know what the word ‘drabble’ means until I googled it. I uh...hope you don’t mind the length :> 

-----------------------

You fell back against the cold hard floor with your arms bent and head turned sideways. The stinging pain spreads across your cheek. It burns. But your mind was still trying to register what had just came into fruition. 

Why?

The thought was so foreign somehow as if you could hardly believe he was doing this. But then the scene plays in your head again. You froze, your gaze enlarged and clueless while staring at the pale ground as it slowly begins to darken in the seeping movement of his menacing, haunting shadow. 

"Insolent woman, you wretch!" He spat in a disgusted tone, "How dare you speak to me in such demanding manner? Have I already told you, only talk when you have something important to say?"

You didn't respond, rather you merely let the strands fall in front of your vision as you gingerly pressed your hand against the place where he hit you. 

I…don't quite understand…

Dottore glowers down at your hunched form. He was never a man known for the virtue of patience. This man, the one who calls him your husband, you learned a long time ago to not meet his eyes as they would signal a hint of dominance amidst his authority, especially during moments like these. You came to feel his eyes instead, they were usually intense and full of wrath, sometimes crazed and curious while looking at his finest creations. He always loved experimenting in his labratory. After all, it was the only thing that could truly make the madman smile.

What is it that I'm missing? Where did I go wrong?

And you would do anything to obtain at least a fraction of the love he had left in his heart. 

He marches onward with heavy footsteps, paying no mind to your well-being, "Tch get out of my sight. I don't have the time to entertain with anymore these theatrics."

At the sound of him leaving you darted your attention towards him, "Wait, come back. Come back, " you plea softly, "Hector…" But he ignores your call. The back of your fiance disappears behind the door and slams it with a resounding thud. He was gone. You couldn't save him.

"No," As a result, you burried your face into your palms and cried.

“I'm sorry.”

…

What is love?

Being raised in one of the most prestigious bloodlines of Fontaine, a life filled with riches since your parents were well known scholars throughout Teyvat, they provided you and your family with everything you needed. From exquisite dishes to priceless jewelry, yet even among those riches you never did find an answer to your question. They were tangibles and short-lasting, eventually leaving you with nothing until the glass of your heart was filled empty. They seemed to have cared more about their fortune along with the brightest child of their family line, your brother, a male heir, someone who fulfilled their expectations where you couldn't do so. And because he was able to give them what they wanted, he was loved.

I see, love is conditional.

Realizing that you possessed no talent to achieve what your brother had accomplished, you came to accept that you were undeserving of their love. Love was for the smart. Love was for the gifted.  Love was for everything you are not. There was no place for your kind and thus you locked yourself up in your bedroom chambers along with your fragile heart where no one would try to find you, picking up the books upon the shelves and getting lost in their fantasies. 

They told you many beautiful things about the world and many reasons why it was so tragic. Because they weren't real. The story begins with a princess who was a kind-hearted soul, deprived from the care of her evil stepmother and dreams of marrying a prince from a land far far away. They often end on a happily ever after with the princes finding her one true love. You've never seen anything like it. Where two people, despite the struggles they went through, loved each other unconditionally.

Unconditional love only exists in dreams.

Or so you thought to believe.

One day a man marched right at the doorsteps of your mansion. He was a student coming all the way from Sumeru Academia and had high hopes of building a business partnership with your father. The man was declined of course, you watched from the garden bushes as he was sent off back into his carriage. He stops abruptly and turns his head ajar to catch your figure, his inquisitive eyes were both striking and sharp. Like thorns of a rose that was ready to prick anyone who dares to come close. Even so, they made a very lasting impression.

Red eyes.

It was the first time that someone had looked your way.

Couple of months later, the government had arranged a grand ball where all nobles would gather and commit to building their social circle. Useless events. There was no reason for you to engage. While your parents were occupied with the latest gossips and your brother surrounded by fathers who were eager to marry their daughters to him, you snuck outside to the balcony and hid away from the crowd. Quiet at last. And as things should be. The moon was your only friend because she was just like you; half empty. Maybe that was why you still had a glimmer of hope for the other half to be filled. 

Part white, you inquired, pristine and untainted. From far away it looked similar to snow. 

"My, how pleasantly surprising."

While the other part was stained with black cinders.

You glanced over your shoulder to see a man leaning against the pillar. His mint coloured bangs were slicked back in a trendy fashion, complimenting the white suit he adorned himself with. The golden chains hanging around his ebony boots dangled and clanged with each step he took forward until the light finally reveals his face.

"You seem familiar," you say while squinting your eyes, "Are you the person my father rejected back in February?"

He quirks one brow and you were afraid if you had offended him. But before you could utter an apology, the man splits his lips into a toothy grin and bursts out into a maniac-like laughter. He was completely insane, you thought to yourself. Though he paid no mind to your discomfort and continued to dwell in his amusement, "Hahaha straightforward, I like it! So what if I am? Is it a requirement to be a noble for me to simply have a chat?"

"And if I may ask why?"

"Hmmm, why?" The man reaches for the balcony and presses his back there. He threw his head backward before drilling his ruby gaze into yours, "I too am not fond of annoying crowds. Those snobbish fools thinking they're above everyone else just because they have a couple of mora when that is all they are worth. It's almost too hilarious for my own good."

You could tell there was disdain in his tone. Mainly towards your father who were one of the many unkind nobles of Fontaine and was only liked because of his success. Gripping your hands upon the stone railings, you looked down at the distant trees below while the wind rustled them apart, "I can't deny that," you say dissapointedly, "It's common for nobles not to associate with lower classes as it could potentially ruin their image. Though I may not have been there but I'm sure you had much to offer in terms of your brilliance, erm, Mister…?"

"Hector," Hector placed a palm on his chest with a polite bow following suit, "Hector Dufour-Lapointé. It is a pleasure to make you an acquaintance Lady (Y/n)."

"You know my name?"

"How could I not?" Hector smirks lazily as he danced around you, "I saw you before hiding behind the rose bushes back in your estate. Quite curious why you didn't attempt to say hello."

He even remembers that too. You fiddled with the fabric of your dress, "My apologies. I'm not use to socializing so much."

“Is that so? I think you're not giving yourself enough credit," he complimented while shrugging, "This is much more entertaining than hanging in that insufferably crowded room, it was an unexpected occurence to meet you here of all places. However, I must say time can fly if I'm able to enjoy myself."

You shifted away from his stare, "You flatter me. We've only been talking for a few minutes."

"I have yet to realize it then" Hector's cheerfulness remains at stance despite your gloomy response. He leans forward like a curious child and tosses you a question, "Then allow me to ask, what brings you out here Lady (Y/n)? I don't see any reason when your family are such highly respected people of Fontaine." 

"I'm not like them!" You retort instantly, causing the man to glance at you with skepticism, "I mean, I have nothing to do with them and they have nothing to do with me. That's just how it is. They already have Clement after all…"

Why am I telling him this?

"Ah your brother I assume. Yes so I've heard much about his genius mind. There were a few instances where he and I collaborated at Sumeru Academia," Hector speaks as if regarding to his unpleasant memories, "Although he never said anything about having a sister."

"We're not that close. And I'm not very fond of him," you confessed bluntly.

"Neither am I," Hector agreed with a scowl, "He claims his position using the knowledge derived from history books but never tries to think beyond the norm. That ignorant mindset of his will surely be his downfall one day."

"Ignorance can lead to anyone's downfall. If they turn a blind eye to the truth, so much can be taken from them," you paused shortly from rambling too much, "That's what I read in books at least."

"As expected of your lineage," he sighs whimsically, "Such avid readers."

"Well my family prefers documents and research. I've gone through them too but I will always love reading fiction."

"Ha! Seems you really are trying to be different from the rest of your family."

Seconds turn to minutes and minutes to hours, you had already forgotten about the cold breeze despite your dress being less than ideal for the outdoors. The man, although he can be a little to blathering at times, was more than what seemed to be on the surface. At first you thought of him as someone here to take advantage of your relations to your father but he seemed so sincere when listening to your stories, so eager while expressing his thoughts and even made you laugh a couple of times. You didn't realize that the clock had already struck twelve as the guests were preparing to leave but you just weren't ready to do the same.

"Until next time (Y/n)," he takes your fingers and pressed a kiss on top of them, though you were more struck by how he addressed you without honorifics, "I look forward to speaking with you again."

A warm smile graces your lips as you cursty, "Likewise Hector. Thank you for listening to me. I know I must have taken a long time."

Hector sneered but you already learned that it was simply his way of expressing amusement, "Hardly. I was thoroughly entertained."

When your parents found out about your meeting with him, they made it clear that you would never see him again. Hector Dufour-Lapointé is what he calls himself but the real name behind this man was Hector Valliere who came from a village hidden in the west of Fontaine. Rumours said that he was chased out of his hometown by an angry mob, claiming him to be a madman conducting unethical experiments on humans. Shortly after his arrival in Sumeru, he abandoned his past identity and replaced it with a new one in order to enter the academy under legal supervision. Associating with a man of a suspicious reputation would only cause harm to your family's name. Though you could barely care much about their reputation. There was nothing for you to benefit from it.

Few weeks have passed and you evetually gave up on the thought of hearing from Hector. They were only fleeting moments, nothing more. Your routine would stay the same as you kept on plucking more books off the shelves, killing whatever time you had. However the activities you used to enjoy somehow lost it's flair and there would be a slight pain in your chest whenever you turn to a page with the princess as she is surrounded by her friends. What exactly changed? Your family still treated you the same. Did you suddenly grow bored from doing the same thing everyday? Why is it that you feel much more lonelier despite being alone for so long? It was hard to tell in a singular perspective. If only there was someone here to give you some insights on things you couldn't see…

A silver bird lands by your front window and you nearly fell out of your chair as it flapped their wings violently. A machine?! They dropped what seems to be an envelope within the thick bushes before taking off and buzzing into the evening sky. You switched off the lock and lifted the glass within a single movement, snatching the piece of paper so that the wind wouldn't blow it away. Hastily you opened it. Both curious and cautious of why would anyone send you mail in such a discreet approach.

Chère Mademoiselle (Y/n),

I can only imagine the shock of your expression once reading this letter. I'm only writing to you since I assume that your father had already told you those nasty rumours about my past. No matter. I trust that you have a good head on your shoulders to not prejudge people using such miniscule details. I wish to speak with you again. Unless you have other plans staying in that stuffy room of yours, meet me behind the clock tower at 11:00 p.m. Don't be late.

Bien à vous,

H.

"It really is him!" The happiness spreads all across your features as you clutched the letter to your chest. For some reason, your heart wouldn't stop racing. It was a simple yet thoughful action on his part but despite how short his greeting was, every word held the weight of a thousand sparks, "I…I can't stop smiling."

And without hesitation, you prepared to leave. No one noticed your absence.

-------

It was only halfway where you realized that Hector didn't give many details redgarding why he planned this sudden event. You caught sight of him standing under the roofs with his hands hidden behind his back. He had on his signature lopsided grin, brows uneven as he glanced at you casually.

"How very punctual, were you so eager that you couldn't wait?" He teases.

"I was surprised when your bird knocked upon my window," you inform, "Is it something urgent?"

"Not at all. I merely wanted to catch up with old times," Hector tilts forward to emphasize his suggestion, "Care to indulge me for a bit?"

You crossed your arms, "Then what is it that you're hiding behind your back?"

"Hmm?" He hums, "You mean this?"

"Ah!"

Roses. A bouquet of bright red flowers were presented to you, nicely wrapped in fabric. In the language of Fontaine, recieving them could mean multiple of things and you couldn't help but feel hesitant despite his thoughtful gesture, "Why are you giving me this?"

"Is it so wrong for me to be a gentleman? I thought it would be best to prepare you a gift after you put all that effort to come out in such a late hour," Hector mused to himself, "Especially when you had to make sure no prying eyes would catch us."

You let out a small laugh before accepting the bouquet, "I wouldn't go as far to say that."

"Oh?" Although it was hard to see, Hector managed to catch a glimpse of your flushed cheeks hidden behind the flowers. A darken smirk climbs onto his face at the inviting thought of what it could mean, "Tell me more."

The whole night you both spent walking around the empty plaza with only the stars as your guide. They paved a silver path reflected in the horizon above, free flowing like one of the many watercolour paintings hung in your chambers, uncertain where they may lead but you followed them regardless. If it weren't for Hector's inivtation you might have never known about the parts of your city due to the restricted lifestyle you lived. He listened to every one of them. The stories you had to tell when there was no one for you to talk to and the complaints about your brother whenever he wanted to snitch on your actions just to get the praise out of your father. You expressed your frustrations when speaking about your incompetences, joy after reading a good fairytale book written by your favourite author, there was so much to say that you were worried if Hector soon grew tired from them.

"Go on. I'm listening."

And your heart flutters again. Suddenly everything felt so light with each step you took, it was as if you walked across the stars in the sky rather than the heavy pavement of the ground you called your home. But even if happiness was a bliss, it tormented you. Because companionship made you realize how poor your were all along. That you had everything yet you had nothing, slowly withering away like the roses you held in your hand. Convinced that your existence was worth nothing more than nothing itself. Doomed to be dismissed and forgotten. Rotting away...Hector stays by your side as you cried softly into the night.

From a distance the bell rings and echoes just like the time before during Fontaine's grand ball. Hector shows you a secret route so that no one could find you.

"Will you write to me again?"

The request was so innocent, purely from genuine intentions and devoided of anything he had in mind. Hector would always laugh in these situations when things have gone unexpectedly yet pleasingly his way but held back knowing that it would be foolish to waste such a priceless opportunity. And so he gave you his smile, one full of secrets where you had mistakened it as a promise, "Of course my dear."

Every night you could no longer fall asleep since he had occupied your thoughts completely. Sometimes you'd dream of him and their tales would unfold similarly to the ones you have read. It gone to the point where the maids would have to wake you up during late afternoons due to the dramatic change in your sleep schedule. Though, you didn't care what they did to you. As long as no one found out about your secret rendezvous.

You never thought that there'd be a day where you would voluntarily give up reading your beloved fairytales. They were now replaced by a stash of his letters that have been accumulated over the past few months. You read them each day, pacing back and forth within the walls of your room, whispering his sentences as if he were the one saying them to you. He made you feel special. You were addicted to this feeling. Eventually you managed to memorize his words by heart. 

The pages of your diary were filled with notes. Like your very own  fairytale carved into reality. From the rose petal, now dried, to the hairpin he snatched from a distracted merchant and a single strand of his hair you found within your cloak after a warm embrace, all of these items, a remnant of the man you loved were taped up in these pages. Sometimes you could even feel his prescence because it was all you needed. It didn't matter if Clement threw insults about how worthless your existence was, your parents could lock you in this prison if they wanted to but they shall never take away Hector from you. Never. You swear it. He was your whole world and the prince who saved you from a life made of aching emptiness. You would do anything to keep him by your side. Anything to gain his affection.

Anything.

"I had a feeling that you were the culprit dear sister."

Your arms stutters as they clutched tightly on the scrolls you took off from the shelves. The light crept into the room like arms reaching out to clutch around your ankles, warning you for trespassing. You turned around dreadfully to see Clement pressing his shoulder against the doorframe with his arms folded and a wicked expression aimed at your pitiful state.

"Why…Why are you still awake?" You say in disbelief, "I thought everyone was asleep."

"Please. Not only are you shameless but hypocritical as well. You truly are a dissapointment to our family."

"Wait," taking a step forward, you stopped him before he makes his exit, "I'll put them back. Just don't tell father about this."

But like your parents, your brother was unkind. Clement doubles over and hugs his torso, cackling through his teeth, "Is that how it is?" He swipes his arm up and you see a parchment paper held between his fingers. 

"No!"

"Ma chérie (Y/n). I must say all this tenacious effort of sneaking in my letters to your window is becoming more and more tiresome. But of course, you are an exception. I want the scrolls you've mentioned the other day at my lair tomorrow evening. Make sure no one discovers this. I'm counting on you. Cordialement! Hector."

"No…" you whispered, feeling the weight of the world fall upon your shoulders as it shattered apart. Hector. If possible, you hoped that the pieces could just crush you right then and there. Your knees felt weak and a fright takes over but despite your turmoil, Clement didn't show a shred of sympathy.

"So this is why you've been acting odd lately. Pathetic," he flaps the paper tauntingly in his grasp, "I can't decide if I should be impressed or baffled by your actions. A secret romance with a criminal and the bloodline of Fontaine's most respected government associates? Even though you've hit rock bottom, you still decided to dig deeper."

"Clement you don't understand!"  Stumbling upon your footsteps, you desperately tried to convey your predicament even if it meant feeding his ego, "Hector is not the man you think. He was shunned by the people of his hometown, treating him as if he were nothing. They…They ignored him! All this time he needed someone to recognize his brilliance, someone to understand." Shakily, you brought your tensed arms to your chest and screamed a silent whisper, "Someone to listen but no one did. He must have felt so alone…"

Clement flinches when you suddenly clutched onto his biceps. When he looked into your eyes, a shiver ran down his spine.

"Hector is counting on me. I'm the only one who can save him. No one else. He needs me Clement, he needs me!" 

"Tch."

An ear-splitting scream of his hand against your face echoes across the room. It knocked you out of your stance and you bumped into the table, grunting while the scrolls to tumbled to the floor.

"Crazy woman, I'm embarassed to be related to you!"

While you were still trying to regain your balance, your brother had already ran off. It wouldn't be long before he alerted your parents, the clock ticking away like sand until the final hour leaves you with nothing but an empty glass. 

"No," despair swallows the strength away from your legs and you crawled towards where he used to stand, "Don't take him away from me…I need him…"

I can't live without him.

I can't live without him.

I can't live without him.

Tears begin to form by the corners of your eyes as you clenched your teeth. This was no time to cry. Balling your fists, you sprinted out of the room, pushing whatever stood in your way as if you were running for your life. 

And if you considered everything else, it wasn't that far from the truth.

-------

"Hector! Hector are you there?" After arriving upon his house, you began knocking on his door aggressively. The lock clicks and you were greeted by an evidently annoyed man gnawing his teeth together.

"Tsk. There better be a good reason-"

"They're coming for us! We have to go. Now. Before it's too late. My father is probably already waking and making arrangements for you to-"

"Enough, I can't even catch what you're saying," He pinches the bridge of his nose while you were still stuck in a frenzy state. He takes a step back and opens the door wider, gesturing for you to come inside, "Get in already. I have a feeling that this will be a long night."

Hector observes intently at the words you tell him.

Not out of concern but akin to the way he watches the insects react when he exposes them to a different environment.

He was a scientist after all. A madman in which you deliberately fell in love with, so much to the point that he was able to feel pity for once. How you trusted him wholeheartedly with all of your vulnerabilities, emotions and secrets like handing him your parts just so he could put you back together again. Tinkering was always one of his favourite hobbies and he couldn't help but feel a twisted sense of pride at the thought of you being completely wrapped around his finger. 

Perhaps that was the reason why he loved you. Because he didn't love you. He loved you in parts.

"It was only a matter of time," Hector sighs. He sneaks his grasp into yours, knowing how much it affects you and puts on an invisible mask of deciet, "I already knew this day would happen long before anyone could have predicted it."

"You did?" With worried eyes you gazed at him, "What shall we do then?"

Knowing he hit the target, his lips begin to curl up towards his ears, showing his sharp white teeth that shone against the dim-litted room. Hector asks, "Do you love me?"

A silly question. You didn't hesitate to answer, "Of course I do. I've said it many times."

"Prove it to me," Forcing his forehead against yours, Hector commands in a dangerously low tone, "Kill your brother and only then you can truly be mine."

Your brain sutters, trying to absorb what he had just said. Kill? As in to take a life? It sounded wrong. But...was it wrong if the life belonged to someone who ruined yours?

Dumbfoundedly, you glanced into the bloody orbs of your lover, his black pupils thinning into knives while burning in the hellfire of his true colours. Hector runs a hand from the scalp of your hair, down to your cheek before gingerly sliding his fingers at your jawline. He pulled you close and whispered into your ear.

"Are you scared?"

Ah, this wasn't about your feelings. This was about him and your future and there could be no future you without him by your side.

You let your eyelids drop and leaned into his touch, "I could never be scared of you Hector. Whether it is within my power or not, I will make sure no one gets in our way. I swear it."

"Good," he continues to have you feed on his affection, "I knew I could count on you."

-----------

The news of your brother's death filled every headline Fontain had to offer. He was driven off a cliff while making a trip towards Sumeru. No one survived. The remains were so crushed to the point that authorities had trouble identifying their bodies. The only explanation they could come up with by observing the leftover tracks was that the horse must have gone out of control and ended up dragging the carriage along with it.

Ha. Serves him right.

Food poisoning. The vial Hector made was very effective. You made sure to bury it away from your mansion.

With no other choice, you became your family's next heir. Hector notifies you that he would be away for several months to solidify a unique connection with a man hailing from Snezhnaya. You didn't think he would arrive at your doorsteps with so much authority. Fatui soldiers followed from behind as the staff paved a way for them to enter. Your father was clearly displeased by his outrageous approach but he knew he was in no place to deny.

"Upon the agreement between Fontaine and Snezhnaya, Lady (Y/n) will become Harbinger Il Dottore's wife," the Duke announces, "This news will be publicly announced at the end of October."

Dottore? Is that what he calls himself?

As if claiming his victory, Dottore shoots your father a devilish smile. You could feel the dining table shake when he kept pressing his fist against the smooth surface, begrudingly congratulating you both for the new engagement. Your mother bursted into tears.

Was it worth it?

You watched both of your parents mourn silently in their own manner. Perfectly knowing that you were the main cause. But you weren't able to feel any sadness because in the end, you now had everything you've ever wanted. 

The inheritance.

Their attention.

But most of all, him.

And when you were convinced that this was your happily ever after, that fairytales were not just beautiful lies for the sake of comfort, you didn't realize  you were already living a life made of beautiful lies conjured by your own mind for the sake of your own comfort. 

"You're nothing without me."

Dried and calloused hands squeezed around your throat as you flailed your legs against the soft fabric of the carpet floor. He encases you in a straddling position, enjoying the sight of your tortured and clenched face. Hector…no, Dottore hated it when you disobeyed him. He despised it when his creations don't work the way he wanted them to and he had no use for things that are broken.

"G-hka--k..-"

"How many times do I have to remind you to not use my birthname. Do those ears of you even function properly? Or must I fix them myself?"

You gasped for air when he relaxed his grip. Vision a blur, you coughed a few times before he pulls your arm so that you lay flushed against his chest.

"Don't forget who saved you dear (Y/n). Because of me you were able to escape that miserable life you've despised for years. I expect the utmost gratitude on your part at all times, it is only fair that I punish you for not meeting my requirements, don't you agree?" Dottore lifts his hand up to pinch your cheeks, pulling your head to stare at your eyes, "After all, there is no one else in this world who can put up with you…but me."

His words were poison in which you drank like a woman starved. It made you feel numb to the pain the more you drowned in their alluring scent, the taste was sweet, a remedy for the bitterness of reality where the man of your dreams was nothing but a cruel monster. You came to believe that the reason why he treated you so harshly was because he was scared of losing you. You were caught in the trap of what seemed to be love and devotion when truly, you were just a toy to be used at a means end. He breaks you and he puts you back together, over and over again, filling in between the cracks formed in your glass heart with the phrases you loved to hear. Just like how he filled the other holes of your life where no one else did. You called it kindness. He saw it as entertainment.

Most people pay attention to the flower's beauty but they never acknowledge the thorns hidden beneath it's blossom.  That is why they bleed. They get hurt. Though, you didn't mind shedding blood if it was for his sake.

Because you would do anything for him.

You would do anything to bring back the memories of Hector Dufour-Lapointé and save him from the Harbinger that ruined his life. Your life. It wasn't his fault. You knew you could change him to what he was before because you were in love with him, that he might still in there. Somewhere.

Right?

…

Please come back.

Time continues to flow like the tears of your dying heart despite yearning for it to turn at the past. Dottore already left the room a long time ago but you didn't. Raising your head away from your hands, you peered at the door in front of you, begging desperately through a chanting record of despondence. 

Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back.

Images, they slipped through your fingers, slowly becoming more distant until your mind began to see them as illusions. Dreams. Things that were not real. Telling you that your life was a lie. 

"Come back to me…Hector."

Because the man you loved was withering in your memories and you couldn't do anything to save him.

A dry croak robbed you of your breath as you turned to look in the mirror.

Worthless. You were always worthless, it was what your parents told you since birth. It was what you became when he wasn't at your side because without him, your existence was worthless. You lied for him, you stole for him you, took a life for him. You destroyed yourself for him to point that it was hard to believe you were even looking at yourself.

Worthless. It's who I am.

And despite it all, you couldn't obtain his love.

(Crack).

Worthless things don’t deserved to be loved.

(Crack. Crack).

But what if it’s because I’m worthless, that he won’t love me back?

(Crack).

Your eyes jolted open, causing you to gasp sharply. When the sweet lies dispersed in your head and cleansed you of deceit, everything started to make sene. You came to realize why your wish was impossible all along.

Dottore...no, Hector, the reason wasn't because he didn't return your feelings. Neither was it due to the fact that he hurt you through his actions. Nor when he made you cry or scream for help before feeding you with more lies, thinking he would never hurt you again. It was none of those things.

It was because the man you loved this whole time was someone who could love no one but himself.

"Ha...haha," sucking in your breath, a sinister laugh escapes your mouth, "Hahahahahahaha.....!"

Everything was worthless.

You grabbed a nearby hairbrush and threw it at the mirror, watching yourself shatter into a million pieces.

There was only one thing left to do. 

------

"Ugh, where is it?!"

It was late into the night where every staff had gone to sleep. The Harbinger fumbles with his keys while standing at the door of his basement as he was too busy proceeding with his research rather than considering the thought of rest. Usually he acted upon them on his own will, performing various experiments for enjoyment. However, ever since the Snezhnayan court had requested him to look into the ancient arts of alchemy, Dottore was forced to carry it out before the deadline approached. Otherwise his position as Harbinger would be revoked.

"What a bunch of self-centered blockheads. Can't they understand that it take quality time to get quality results?"

Most of his important documents were stored on the otherside. Half of it came from his father-in-law's library. He had you to thank for that.

"Ah finally," he mutters, though still dissatisfied, "I should have a word with my butler for misplacing them."

Dottore shoves the key into the lock but instead of twisting the knob he noticed something strange. It was old and had yet to be fixed but somehow he didn't have any trouble adjusting his wrist. Then he saw there were a set of freshly made fingerprints upon the smooth metallic surface. However, the only person awake at this time would be him-

An intruder!

Dottore drops everything to the ground and yanks the door open. He skittered down the stone stairs while cursing under his breath. Using the delusion gifted by the Tsaritsa, the Harbinger activated his lazer-like pillars as he took advantage of their glow to light up the unlit room.

"What in the abyss...?!"

Except it wasn't dark.

"All of these scrolls, I recognize them," without sparing a single glance, you spoke nostalgically towards the bookshelves, "It brings me so much memories..."

Dottore clenches his teeth together as his eyes shone an angry red, you were holding a torch dangerously close to his hard-earned collection, "What do you think you're doing?!" He fumed, "Put that out, AT ONCE! Don't make me repeat myself!

"They're precious to you aren't they?" You finally shifted to face him, "More than me."

"What has gotten into you?" He was about to hurl at you until he saw your torch lowering, causing him to retreat. You were strangely noncholant and he couldn't help the feeling of disturbance. Accepting that he didn't have the upperhand, Dottore decided to use a different approach, "(Y/n)."

The sound of your name falls from his lips. You faltered.

"I'm sorry for what I have done. I know I was dishonourable to you, as your husband and lover, and that you didn't deserve to see me so aggressive. You have every right to express your anger, my dear. I was in the wrong."

It was only a mask. You knew it well. But seeing him with softened eyes and a tone so comforting, made you desperately wanting to run into his arms so he could wipe away your sorrows just like once upon a time. To live happily ever after.

Hector.

Dottore runs his fingers through his hairstrands in frustration and sighs, "However the Tsarista needed me to do something very important and I can't seem to fulfill her request no matter how hard I try. It angers me. If I don't finish this, there would be no place for us to stay."

"Hector..." you sniffled quietly. He looks so much like him right now.

"Can't you see I'm doing this for you?" He consoles, yet his weapons still remain, "I only intended to make you happy and there's nothing I won't do to achieve that. How about I show-"

"Enough."

Dottore froze upon your sudden command. He didn't sense a hint of subjugation and it seemed that you had perfect control of your emotions. How very inquisitive. Did you grow immune to the style of his voice? In such a short period of time? The facade he had on was now replaced with a growling animal-like expression. You looked at him dissapointedly. His Harbinger self returned. Hector was no more.

"Ha, you're the same as always. Even before the time you became a Harbinger. The same man that I fell in love with but it is me who will never be the same again," For a moment you averted your gaze as if trying hard to swallow your own words, "Remember when we first met at the balcony? That I told you my favourite books to read are fiction? I knew they weren't real but deep down, I wanted to believe in them anyways. And you know what? They did come true, to some degree..."

As the memories come flashing back, he defenselessly watches your expression contort from sadness to a calm contemplation and finally, enraged disgust, "But you only ever brought me pain and I'm sick of it!"

Swaying the torch to the side, Dottore flinches forward but he didn't dare to come close when your current state was unpredictable to him, "I JUST WANTED YOU TO LOVE ME," you wail, I just wanted to be loved, bringing a clawed hand against your forehead and trembling upon contact, "It's all that I ask for..."

Dottore narrowed his brows. Perhaps he may have gotten too far.

"But I know it's impossible. The world is a cruel place and there's no point in trying anymore. That is why I'm going to set us free."

"...What do you mean?"

You shut your eyes closed and tossed the flaming torch to the ground. A horrified expression takes over his features. It didn't take long for the fire to begin spreading amongst the room.

"NO!" Dottore yelled powerfully, he frantically darts his gaze at all directions as they continued to flicker and blend into his precious documents. You stood still and watched him grab the ones that were intact, savouring the most he could but they slip out of his arms every time he moved. Dottore glances behind him to see a rising cage of hellfire. Then he turns to you.

" 'Til death do us part!" you laughed maniacally.

The madman looked back with angry dismay, "You're out of your mind!"

Abandoning whatever he held in his hand, Dottore spins around towards the staircase. He covers his face with his sleeve and did whatever he could to prevent the fire from touching him. However, he accidentally stumbled on his footsteps and something fell off the heights, knocking him in the face. He grunts painfully.

"That will leave a scar," you smile while he clutches at his injury, "I can break you too.”

Just like how you broke me.

Knowing that you've managed to leave a mark of your existence on him in someway, you peacefully watched your lover wobble between the hell you created. But the hell you knew was not made of scorching heat and thundering flames. Hell was empty. Hell was a void. This feeling was far too gentle to be considered hell. If he can't return your love, then at least let these caging arms bask you in the warmth you’ve always desired.

Lifting your head, you looked towards the ceiling and closed your eyes.

Ah, this cannot be death.

Yes, i talked with her personally and she thinks it's funny that i discovered that I have a poor eyesight because of it. I thought it was normal for vision to be that blurry.

Oop-- I see we both have terrible sight. 😂

Kyaa! I'm really happy to be tagged by Elli!! >♡<

1. Main DPS - Karmic debt.

2. Sub DPS - Ehe.

3. Healer - Idol with the nerfed voice.

4. Support - Retired old man.

Tagging: @fcfancy @oikawasbbyy @albehoe @/anyone (I don't have many mutuals. Please become my friend). :<

Tag Game

Describe your Genshin Impact team as badly as possible.

Support DPS - Overworked warrior princess

Main DPS - Frosty goat with exploding arrows

Support Utility - Drunk bard in Diluc’s basement

Moral Support - BOUKEN DA BOUKEN

@kaeya-kisser @ellitx @cas

If Lilia broke up with me I'd probably go for the therapist. I need to assess what the fork is wrong with me, why do I gravitate unsustainable relationships with single grandads

Haha, so true, anon! Lilia is just too good of a forbidden fruit for us. ^v^

If Lilia broke up with you, who would you go for next? (Cannot be Diasomnia)

║Chongyun║Ghost

Requested from Wattpad.

Gender-neutral.

Word count: 2.6k

---

"Hey, Chongyun, do like doing whatever you're doing?" you ask, balancing the flat side of a pencil on your upper lip. He tears his eyes away from a book he was invested in, focusing his attention to you

"Exorcism, I mean."

"Of course," he plainly answers without hesitation, a bit confused as to why you suddenly brought it up. You look at him skeptically from the side of your eyes before placing the pencil down on the table. "Are you sure you aren't saying that because your family is consisted of exorcist?" you say, "I mean, if my line of family were full of exorcist, I might feel a bit burdened and pressured.. Feeling as if I have no other choice but to carry out the family name.."

He takes your thoughts into consideration, agreeing that it does sound reasonable. "I understand what you are saying, but believe me, being an exorcist is what I love doing," he reassures, and you, not wanting to push the topic further, let it go at that, enjoying another comfortable silence under the setting sun the shone through the windows of the living room.

Chongyun has been visiting you frequently for the past week that him being there wasn't a bother to you now. Well, it didn't bother you at all, it was just that your heart couldn't handle itself whenever he was around; you shyly admit that you have a small crush on the exorcist.

"Oh, right, I--" Just as you were speaking, the front door burst open, causing you and Chongyun to be startled and look over the sofa, seeing another bluenette stepping inside. "Xingqiu, you can't just barge into someone's house like that!" you shout, fuming with a slight anger. "And you'll break the door!"

Xingqiu stood there, looking a bit clueless as if he totally forgot why he came to your house. "Hey, Xingqiu, what are you doing here?" Chongyun ask, setting down the book to the space beside him and stood up, facing the other male. "Chongyun, so you're here again, huh?" Xingqiu asks, not even bothering to greet either the two of you. His eyes started to wander around the place, looking quite worried and something else that you couldn't quite place your fingers on.

"Not going to greet us politely, huh?" you commented with a bored expression. Chongyun stares at you then back to Xingqiu. "Hey, wanna take this outside?" he asks, snapping Xingqui out from his daze. "Oh, right, is.." Xingqiu trails, not wanting to say anything further, eyes hiding something deep within their colours that was covered with great anxiousness.

Chongyun nods silently. "Yeah, it's okay," he says and then turns to you. "Ill be right back, (Y/N)." You nodded quietly, a bit concerned for the bookworm as he looks your way, yet not say anything. He looked out of it and you planned to ask Chongyun once he comes back.

The two males went outside, closing the door behind as they leave. You strain your ears to eavesdrop on their conversation, but the door muffled out clear words, so you gave up, slouching into the seat.

It took no more than 10 minutes for them to chat outside before Xingqiu leaves the premises and Chongyun returning back inside. However, Xingqiu looked somewhat panicked with eyes filled of worry and the other element that you couldn't quite pinpoint. "What were you guys talking about? Xingqiu looked a bit off," you say, eyes following the bluenette back to his spot beside you.

"It's nothing.. Xingqiu has just been having nightmares, is all," he hesitantly says, eyes not looking your way as he utters so. You were quite surprised. Xingqiu? Having nightmares? That was truly new and quite something to tease him about-- but that was something you won't do, since it was something concerning if he looked the way he did.

"Oh, it's getting late," Chongyun comments, looking out the window behind you. "Should I cook you something to eat before I leave?" You shook your head, "The snacks from earlier kind of spoiled my appetite for tonight. I'll see you tomorrow."

He nods and bid you a good night before exiting your house.

You stayed in the living room for a while then cleaned up any mess and locked the front door before going to your room and changing into your sleepwear.

Letting out a tired sigh, you sunk under the warmth of your comforters, burying your face into one of the pillows. No matter how tired you may be, your thoughts did it's usual thing- wandering around aimlessly and thinking whatever it wants to, which brought you to Chongyun.

It was something you think about each night and it never fails to make your heart squeal. You had been picking up unusual behaviours from him throughout the week such as accompanying you everywhere-- be it to your kitchen or outside the streets of Liyue. It kind of made you more confident about confessing to him.

Someday, you'll confess, you thought to yourself and drifted off to sleep, dreaming a happy dream of the potential future if he does happen to reciprocate your feelings.

When the sun shone through your curtains, Chongyun was already at your door, waiting for you to open the door. "Good morning, did you already have breakfast?" Chongyun greets. "Not yet," you answered and move out of the way to let him in.

"I'll go make something for you right now," Chongyun says, giving you one look before heading to the kitchen where you watch him make breakfast for the both of you. It was unnatural at first, but with the amount of persistence, you allowed Chongyun to make breakfast for you each day.

"Thank you for the meal," you say and took your chopsticks, taking a bite before complimenting his skills.

It was a quiet morning, both of you enjoying breakfast. Then, "Say, (Y/N), is there something you want to do before you die?" Chongyun suddenly asks. You look away from your bowl and look at him curiously, though his gaze was on his bowl. "That's out of the blue.." you comment, chuckling a bit.

He places his chopsticks down and closed his eyes, sighing. "Well, is there?" He looks up at you, revealing his cat-like eyes. At that, you knew he wasn't going to let you change topics, not that you have anything else to talk about, and that it was something that most people suddenly brings up suddenly. "Hm.. I don't think so. I mean, I'm really happy with my life right now and being by yours and Xingqiu's side," you say, taking the topic with much thought.

"You're lying," he affirms, catching you with surprised eyes. "What do you mean?" you ask, quite confused at how strongly he believes his words. "There is not one person who doesn't have at least one thing that they want to have or want to do before they die," he expresses.

You weren't sure why he was taking the topic so seriously. He asked you this multiple times before and back then, he just hums in response. But since he pushed the topic on, you have no other choice but to think it thoroughly.

You thought about things that you used to want to do, but they were sooner or later fulfilled. Then, your reoccurring fantasy popped into your head as stealthily as it could: Chongyun reciprocating your feelings. You guessed that it was the only thing left to do in this world-- maybe going on adventures with him as a couple.

Knowing this, your face flushes red-- the same colour when Chongyun accidentally ate something spicy to make him hot. "Hm? (Y/N)?" Chongyun stares at you quizically. "Well, did you figure it out?"

"Oh, ah, uhm.. I-- It's nothing!" you stutter, averting your eyes from him and chuckling awkwardly. Did he possibly know and that's why he was asking? You didn't know. "Can you tell--" You caught him off. "Ah, why are you being so pushy today, hm? Do you want me to say something specific?" you ask. Seeing your sudden burst, Chongyun decided to leave it at that, returning the atmosphere to the comfortable silence to help you relax and forget about what he asked.

"Hey, Chongyun, you haven't been doing any exorcism at all these past few days-- what's up with that?" you brought up, now located in the living room where both of you spend most of the day away doing whatever pops inside your head. "Ah, I just have much free time, is all," he answers, sounding as if he predicted you'd question him about it sooner or later.

"Really? Well, I heard that there was a ghost that's been haunting an old lady's place and many other series of hauntings.." Upon hearing your own words, you gasped. "Wait, could Xingqui's nightmare be linked to this?" You turn your upper body to face the male.

"Oh, uh, I guess..?" Chongyun says and shrugs, not knowing what else to say. You crossed your arms, mentally patting yourself. It was silence after that, doing your own thing as Chongyun does his.

"Hey, you wanna go somewhere?" Chongyun asks, getting your attention. "Sure? Where do you want to go?" You look at him, eyes following up as he stands up. "You'll find out," is all he said and you had no other choice but to follow.

Out on the streets, you both bumped into Xingqui, who looked quite sleep deprived, looking down at the grown below him. "Hey, have you been crying?" was the first thing you say, seeing redness around his eyes. You went to put a hand on his arm, but he flinched when you did so.

He looks up. "Oh, hey.." he greets tiredly. "Xingqiu, are you okay?" Chongyun ask, visibly concerned for his best friend.

Xingqiu was quiet for a while, looking hesitant to speak. "Chongyun, when will you finally do it? I can't stand this any longer and knowing that you're always going there is driving me insane!" He harshly grabs Chongyun shoulders.

"Calm down, Xingqiu." You put a hand on his shoulders, feeling him stiffen for a quick second before letting go of Chongyun. Xingqiu did not act the way he used to be and it worried both you and Chongyun.

The hydro male took a breather, both of you allowing him to do so. Then, "When will you let go?" he whispers, his tone breaking.

Your heart tightened. You did not know what was happening with Xingqiu, but it hurt you seeing him looking like a mess. He wasn't his usual self.

You looked over to the icy male, eyes filled with worried. He looks at you, eyes also filled with the same emotion, yet hiding something else within it.

Sighing, Chongyun spoke, "Come with me, Xingqiu, and you too, (Y/N)." You nodded, and followed, looking over to Xingqiu every now and then whose head was down, hiding the emotions swirling in his eyes.

Soon, the three of you returned to your house. You were confused, but didn't say anything and letting Chongyun speak. "(Y/N), you like me, don't you?" Chongyun suddenly ask, back facing you as his front faces your house.

The air in you felt as if it was punched out. "How did you.." You couldn't finish it. How did he figure it out? Did Xingqiu tell him? You did tell Xingqiu your feelings for the exorcist, but to think he betrayed you? You turn to the traitor. "Xingqiu--" You were cut off. "It's useless, (Y/N).." Chongyun gave a heavy sigh.

"He can't hear you."

You were confused. What did he mean? "(Y/N), I am going to guess the one thing you want before you die.." Chongyun says. "You like me and want to confess your feelings, right? It'll feel much heavy if you don't." He didn't directly answer your question, but he was getting there.

"Yesterday, Xingqiu told me about it and I guess that is the one thing you want to do or else you can't rest."

"(Y/N), do you know why I kept visiting you?" Chongyun asks. You, however, couldn't give a reply, too confused to see where he was getting at. "I was trying to exorcise you."

"What do you mean by that, Chongyun? I don't understand," you say. First, Xingqiu can't hear you and second, he is trying to exercise you? It was confusing and it would be understandable.. For other restless spirits.

Chongyun turns his body to face you, however, his head was the same a Xingqiu's; head facing down. "(Y/N), you're dead."

Your heart dropped to the pit of your stomach upon hearing it. It sounded absolutely absurd and you didn't believe it.

Quickly, you turn to Xingqiu and grabbed him by his shoulders, tears threatening to fall. However, when you made contact with him, he flinches. "Hey, Xingqiu, don't play with me right now!" you raise your voice that would be loud to annoy him to break this little prank, but he just stares at you-- or rather, looking your way with a sadded expression but not really at you.

".. Hey, Chongyun, they're in front of me, aren't they?" Xingqiu ask, cracking a sad smile as tears start to trickle his face. Chongyun nods silently.

Knowing this, Xingqiu continues. "(Y/N), I can't hear you or see you.. But let me apologise.. I'm sorry.. It's my fault that you.. Died," he says. "If we hadn't gone to that cliff after it rained, I would still be able to talk with you."

It took a while to understand and recall what he was saying, but the locked memory- the last puzzle to understanding everything- returned to you. That day, you had slipped and fallen, and because at how sudden it was, you panicked and was unable to spread your glider, leading to your death.

Xingqiu has been recuperating from the horror and guilt, having nightmares of the scene he had witnessed that day.

Chongyun was the one to find your spirit bounded to your house and the streets of Liyue being an exorcist and all, so he took it upon himself to make sure you rest in peace. However, since you weren't aware you were dead, it made it difficult for him to make that happen. So, he hung around you, sneakily exercising you when you two hung out in your house.

Tears fall down on the side of your face, now having memory of it, and turned to Chongyun who looked at you with sadness.

Sadness. That was the one emotion you couldn't figure out.

"I.. I'm really sorry, (Y/N)," Chongyun spoke softly, looking at you. "I don't want you to go, but as an exorcist.. And to relieve Xingqui's nightmares.. I, I have no other choice."

"But before you go, I want you to know that I've always liked you.. I was.. Hoping to tell you how I felt, but I guess I can't now," voice breaking as he confesses.

"No.. I, I don't want to go!" you shout and clung onto his shoulders. "I'm not going, I'm not going!" More tears fell faster than it did before as you pleaded to stay.

He places his hands on your shoulders, tears of his own trickling down his face. "Please, wait for me in the next life," he says.

The reason why Chongyun excels than that of other exorcist was because of his energy, and that was something you knew. And so, a stubborn and tireless spirit such as yourself was nothing for him once he got you to awaken and face what was to be your eternal rest.

"Sweet dreams."

---

Late night rants•••

I really hate when people trash talk about certain characters like Diluc, calling him bad and weaker than some other character. I can't stand people comparing him with other characters who have a completely different kit and purpose. They trash him and for what?? He is an amazing character and DPS with a good lore and heart. If he was a limited time character, I bet you that people would be wanting him like they did back when the game was still fairly new. I wished he was a limited time character. I would have happily thrown my money on his banner.

Starting the new year with sad news that Ayakashi RR isn't going to bring new events.. That's technically saying that it's dead. I wish that people love the game as much as I do so that it would still continue..

✦❘༻𝚃𝚠𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚆𝚘𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚁𝚞𝚕𝚎𝚜༺❘✦

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Rules for NSFW is located here!

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If you request something that is against my rules, your request will be ignored.

• You can request as many times as you want (when it is open)

-> But it would be nice to allow others to request

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ஜ۩۞۩ஜ Do’s ஜ۩۞۩ஜ

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• Yandere themes

• NSFW (please read those rules first)

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ஜ۩۞۩ஜ Don'ts ஜ۩۞۩ஜ

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• Character x ocs

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•  If you request and want the story to go in a particular way, please add a description

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You can read my works here!

BRO OPPOSITES OF THE WAR WAS SO FUCKING GOODDDDDDDD 💕💕💕✨✨♥️ BRO PLS PART 2 😭😭🥹 (not forcing you though lol ☺️ I vv much enjoyed)

║Lilia Vanrouge║ Opposites of the War 2

Reader: No pronouns or description used. Gender neutral.

Warning(s): None

A/N: Ask and you shall receive. Totally rushed the ending since it was getting too long.

Part 1 is here!

If you like my work, tips would greatly help!

All rights reserved. Do not steal/copy and paste and upload it anywhere.

—

Despite his natural talent for collecting lives, he by no means enjoys it. But, he is merely a loyal tool for the monarchy to use however they please. He had no say in this matter.. Not that he had any since he is the right hand man to the Queen and thus, meant that they had his utmost loyalty.

“General!” A soldier runs up to him with a panicked look on his face. “General..” He pants. “The camp in the north has been attacked..!

“We received word from the general stationed there that they request you make haste.” Contrary to his thoughts, he is aware that he is a valuable asset for war and he takes pride that he could be of use. This was, after all, the nature that runs through his blood.

Although.. He does wish it would end soon..

Ah, yes, how many moons ago had he met that.. Person? For a fae, a day means nothing, but for some reason, Lilia felt like he’s lived half a century already waiting for them.

—

“The Briar Kingdom and Valley of Thorns have signed a peace treaty!” Crowds of faes chatter, gathering in the town square to listen to the royal messenger from the castle. “The returning soldiers will march forth from the gates midday. The fallen will also be remembered for their contributions.” With that, the messenger steps off of the stage. And just as the messenger’s words, soldiers entered through the Kingdom’s gates at the sound of a trumpet in the afternoon.

Many walked on foot through the kingdom, taking the praises and cheers coming from both sides of the streets, and there are those on horseback.

Many cheered at the returning soldiers, yes, but more so to the General whom always dressed in black. Everyone knew the great things that General Vanrouge had contributed to the war, especially noting how he alone took down twelve strong human wizards that hold equal magic strength to that of a lower-ranked fae. To him, however, it weighed the same amount as any battle he has fought.

“Vanrouge,” a burly fae with a short beard trots his horse beside the quiet fae. “This is a joyous occasion with many people chanting your name; why that scary look, hm?” Not many are able to approach said fae like this slightly older fae. These faes cannot deny the admiration and respect they hold towards him, yet they are simply too fearful to approach him. It doesn’t help that Lilia could do a 180 in personality at any moment and become unhinged.. Such as on the battlefield.

“General Verne.” Lilia acknowledges the fae but that’s about it. “Hoho, still as quiet as ever; only speaking when needed. I believe that Her Majesty had heard the most words out of ya than even yer mother,” Verne does not seem to be afraid in the slightest as his voice booms with laughter. It was deep, but not intimidating. “Look, Vanrouge, do you see the smiles of the people that’s happy to see ya?” He outstretches a hand towards the people.

“I think a smile would make them even more happy. You are quite popular, you know that, right, Duke?” Verne looks at him with mischief in his eyes, but Lilia does nothing to make himself appear riled. “General Verne, as of the moment, I am a soldier for the Queen, not a duke,” Lilia’s voice went a bit deeper (still not as deep as the burly fae), one he uses to command troupes. This was a nonthreatening reminder, however. “I would appreciate it if you could remember that.”

Verne was silent and stares long and hard at his side profile before breaking out into boisterous laughter, “Haha, alright, alright no more teasing for the terrifying general.” After that, they trot in silence, though not completely as cheers continued all the way to the castle’s entrance.

Nearing the gate to Her Majesty’s home, Verne looks to his side once more, “Still, I’m glad that you’re alive and well,” he admits softly with a smile. “I was worried when I heard that twelve mages tried to off you and you only came back to your camp in the morning but bandaged.”

He pats Lilia’s back. “I wonder how you managed to survive for a night out there looking the way you did. You’re real lucky, Vanrouge.”

Lilia does not indulge in the chatter, to prevent leaking a certain secret he holds. Although, it probably won’t be a secret for far long.

—

“Vanrouge.” A female voice draws his attention away from the window to behind him. It was a window that looked past the kingdom’s housings and the gate further away; he had a look of longing to whatever was out there.

“Your Majesty.” As if on instinct, he knelt on the floor with his head down and a closed fist over his heart. “There’s no need to kneel; I didn’t come to chat as master and familiar,” she said and paused for a moment as if to think of a better way to put her thoughts into words. “Are you perhaps waiting for someone, Vanrouge?”

Ah.. Was it that evident? He was sure he had practiced enough to not let anyone be able to decipher his thoughts; if even the closest of people can’t read him, then enemies won’t be able to know of his plans, or so he thinks.

“It has been seven years.. Instead of merrying with the common folks in the main hall, you are here,” she said. “Something is on your mind and knowing you, it certainly isn’t a something but rather, a someone.” His jaws tightened as what she said was all true. Lilia is not one to dwell on past history so it could only come down to him dwelling on a person. He felt foolish and ashamed to have made the Queen grow concerned for him, but maybe she could help with his selfish wish.

“Your majesty..”

__

In just a few months time, the Valley of Thorns opened up its gates to the Briar Kingdom. The faes were at unrest and questioned the Queen’s actions. Why in the great sevens did she open up to those selfish humans that quick? Let’s not forget to mention how she has a plan already in progress of making a grand festival to officially declare its gates being opened to humans.

“I trust that everything is going smoothly, Vanrouge?” The Queen sits atop her throne, staring at Lilia who knelt before her. “Yes, you’re majesty,” he answers, head pointed to the grown in respect despite the Queen’s wants for him to look at her; that it was okay as he was the most loyal servant to the crown. “Good. I put all my faith and power into your hands. This is, after all, what you wished for.”

There was a moment of contemplation, the Queen carefully putting words together in her head. “This is the first time you have ever requested something from me.. This human, they must be special,” she said. Despite the rest of her face being unreadable and ever the expressionless (much like Lilia), the small curve upward betrays her heart. Like every other monarch, they want nothing but the best for their people. She believes that Lilia had more than deserved this selfish wish of his for always being compliant for the many years she had reigned over the land.

After the short conversation, he was free to leave, but not with a reminder— a warning, “Do remember what you are getting into, Vanrouge.. This is a human you are promising yourself to.”

—

When a fae loves, they love deeply. There’s a famous tale spread in these lands, a tale of one of their kind giving too much of their love to a human.. It’s a tale of regrets that ended in tragedy.

Lilia has heard that tale many times as a young boy; his mother loved to tell him the story and at the end, she’d tell him humans are creatures that are capable of love just as faes. There wasn’t much difference except in how they look.

“Vanrouge!” A gruff, yet jolly voice calls him from behind. “Haha, yer so easy to spot even with this crowd; you should really try wearing different clothes— maybe you’d look better in them than black.” Verne hooks an arm behind his neck and continues walking beside him. “General Verne, I don’t recall you being stationed here,” Lilia states.

“Ah, don’t worry about that. I’ll go back soon; I just wanted to check up on you since I heard you were the one in charge of the preparations,” he said and chuckles cheekily. “Haha, so do I call you General Vanrouge or Duke?”

“Either is fine,” he answers dryly. “Hm? So yer still doing the patrolling, huh?” Verne lets out a hefty chuckle and pats him on the shoulders. “Ya know, Vanrouge, it’s okay to take it easy sometimes.. Go have some time to yourself, mingle with folks— don’t you know how many ladies swoon over yer and have been dying t’ talk to ya? Hahaha!”

His laughter turned abrupt and held still in the air as a thought stirs in his mind. His lips turned into a coy smile, “Unless.. You’re keeping a secret lover..?” His eyebrows wiggles teasingly. The scary general gave him a look that shows how much he isn’t impressed. Lilia was slightly bothered at this point. As much as he respected his colleague, this was all pointless chatter to him.

“General Verne, the celebration is reaching its peak; don’t you suppose that you are required at your post now that there’ll be more guests from afar?” Lilia avoids the topic altogether whilst reminding the fae.

Verne unhooks his arm around him and chuckles, though a bit more on the awkward side. He could feel the annoyance seething through Lilia and knew it would be best to not pester him anymore. “Haha.. I guess I’ve been gone for a long while now,” he said, turning on his heels. “Well then, see ya later, Vanrouge.”

Lilia stood and watched as Verne disappeared amongst the crowd, only leaving once he could no longer see his back.

“Secret lover..?”

The fae’s voice echoes in his head and without even noticing, he picked up his pace. He smoothly- yet swiftly- pushes through the crowd. His pale complexion could not hide the soft pink that grew ever the more noticeable as the word “lover” repeats in his head.

“Have you been to the shop outside the gate? I heard they’ll sell just about anything if you’ve got the madols for it..” Despite the loud crowd, his ears could only overhear 2 ladies chatter at a distance, making him stop on his tracks to hear a bit more.

“Yes, I have! The human is such a darling, let me tell you. They even managed to sell a rare ore to me,” the second spoke. “It’s perfect for a wedding ring that my son will give to his fiancée.” They squeeled at the joyous news, but that is not what Lilia cared about.

“I wonder how they managed to bring an entire house here though.. Do you think it has legs?”

—

“Thank you for coming!” You stood behind the counter with the best customer service smile you could pull.

When the last customer for the afternoon left, you let out a tired sigh. It has been so long since you last had so many people come to you and you were worried that you had gotten rusty at talking to people.

You walked around the counter and put a sign at your door that you’d be back in an hour; you were going to have your lunch break.

“Maybe I should go out and see what the kingdom has.. There’s so many faes and high levels of magic..” You chatted to yourself, going behind the counter again and entering another room behind a curtain to fetch a satchel and stuffing a sandwich that you’ll bring while strolling through the city.

On the other side of the curtain, the bell that hang above the door rang, signalling that someone had walked in. Didn’t I put a sign up..? Your brows furrowed and frowned. Nevertheless, you put on your best smile once more and walked out of the room. “Hello! Welcome to—“ Your breath hitches and you felt like your heart had momentarily stopped.

“Lilia..!” When you called, your voice was soft as if speaking louder might cause the still water to tremble and thus, making him disappear just like a mirage in the water. Even though you knew that the Valley is where he lived, seeing him again after so many years had made you suddenly weak in the knees. He doesn’t look like he had aged a bit (courtesy to him being a fae). Not a single blemish had touched his face.

He doesn’t say anything at first, a small of a smile on his lips. “I didn’t think that you would be here,” he said, approaching your figure that was still behind the counter. He rests a hand on the counter and takes a better look at you. He knew how fast humans age but to him, it didn’t look like you had aged at all. It had been so long since he had seen you, but he could still vividly remember what you had looked like all those years ago.

Your face grew slightly pink at the comment, “Well, you did write in your letter that the Valley of Thorns and Briar Kingdom is holding a celebration..” You scratch your cheeks. He chuckles, “I didn’t think you’d showed up since you hadn’t written back.”

“Eh, I did..?” You blinked owlishly. “Didn’t your bat come back to you?” It was now his turn to look lost. “No, it didn’t..” After a long pause, laughter erupted from you both. “Hehe, surprise..!” You giggle cheekily.

“Hmph. It is quite a pleasant surprise, but I believed that I would have missed you had I not overheard some ladies talking about.. A shop on legs?” He crosses his arms. His lips slightly droop so he looks like he’s pouting.

You chuckle and walked around the counter to stand beside him with no barrier between you two. “I had faith that I was serviceable enough that word would reach you.”

His eyes lingers on you before trailing down to the side of your hips at the peculiar looking satchel. “Hm? Are you going somewhere?” He uncrosses his arms.

“Actually yeah, it’s my break so I wanted to look at your home!” You grinned. He smiles with a suggestion, “Then, may I do the honours of showing you?” He outstretches and arm towards you.

“Yes. Yes, you may.” You hook your arms from under and let him walk you out of the store. “Would it be safe for you to leave the store unintended?” He asks, staring at the house and then back to you.

“Mm.. Yeah, it’ll be fine! It knows when to lock the door when people are around, but sometimes it likes to lock me out when it gets moody..” You mumble the last bit, your mood clearly soured just a bit as you pout. A chuckle erupts from his chest.

How many times had he laughed just moments after meeting you again? The faces that the ongoers make surmises that it’s not often that they get to see the duke smile, let alone laugh.

Before you entered the large gates, you unhook your arms from his. The action was done subconsciously, you still believing that it was inappropriate to blatantly show affection publicly since you are a human not known to them, and especially since you were with the famed General respected by all. It was alright though, with just a bit more time, maybe you’ll reach that dream of yours.

“Do any of these jewelry fancy you?” He asks when you stopped at a particular stall out on the streets. There were some gems native to only the Valley and common to them, but for you, you were in awe at them. You had hoped to be able to obtain some from their mines, but it’ll be an agenda done later. “Hmm.. I’m just looking. They’re all so beautiful though!” You said, but more so to the gems that were used.

You turn your eyes away, “Let’s continue!” He nods and guides you further inside to the heart of the kingdom. At the centre, there was dancing and music playing; it was lively, safe to say.

When you were looking around, Lilia slipped by you without you ever noticing. “Lilia— oh!” You turned your head to the side and was immediately stuffed with something sweet. “It’s a strawberry sando,” he said. You held the sandwich and chewed on the part you bit. Your eyes lit up at the soft texture and the sweet taste that filled your mouth.

Lilia couldn’t help but chuckle softly at your adorable expression.

—

“Where are we going next?” You asked, walking side by side with him. You noticed that you were walking away from the crowd, the voices were growing faint. Lilia does not say anything, but you notice the corner of his lips curled upward just by a bit. Albeit curious, you did not ask anymore.

“Would you care for some tea?” He asks. Suddenly, you were now standing in front of a large estate after passing an extremely large gate. “W-wha—? T, this is where you live!?” You ask in disbelief. You knew that he was some important guy, but you didn’t think he was this important!

He chuckles but doesn't say anything, guiding you to the main hall of his home. “I’ve let everyone have a day off today,” he begins and looks over his shoulder at you while he brews a cup of tea, “Nobody is here but us.”

He walked further inside the house— if you can call it that; it looks more like a castle— and entered a sunroom. If you didn’t know any better, you would have swooned at the thought of him awaiting your arrival.. Maybe that wasn’t far from the truth.

You sat down across from him and drank the first few minutes in a comfortable silence. “Mm, I haven’t had tea like this before..” You muttered, looking at the light purple liquid in your cup. “It’s a local brew here in the kingdom,” he answers, “Do you like it?”

You place the cup back on its saucer. “It’s good!” You grinned. You shift your posture and look at him with excitement. “How have you been?”

He chuckles. “Kufufu, don’t you ask that every letter?” You became flustered. It was true that you were not the best with words and can’t think of ways to start a normal conversation, especially since you have been by yourself most of the time due to travelling. “Eh.. It’s just that it’s different saying it and then hearing your answer right in front of me,” you say, “At least this way, I can actually see that you’re okay..”

He lets out a breathy chuckle. “Then I have been well, aside for the days where I had been longing for a certain someone,” he says and his eyes narrow playfully.

Your face heats up and look around the room frantically to avoid eye contact with him. “Ah..”

“Hm? What happened to you being so bubbly?” He tilts his head teasingly and crosses his arms. “Well, it’s just that.. You’re a lot different from when I first met you!” You answered honestly. Lilia Vanrouge, the one who’s feared and respected by many— if not, all— was usually the reserved type. But after confessing his wish of wanting to court you, it felt like he’s shown more expressions that you were sure you’d not get the opportunity to witness.

“Oh? I suppose you are correct..” He smiles softly. You were the only one who could make his heart flutter like this.

Still, this was fine. Fine with him and fine with you. Breathing in, you fixed your posture and return a smile of your own. “I missed you too.”

~♡~

I would love to continue this but I’m sure it’d be boring by then and becoming too long.

--

Tags:

@anonima-2