Luna Camellian Icons 🩷🌸💜💙

is it just me or does the 🪷 lily pad emoji remind me of a pussy? is that why i like it so much? no?

Bi women get flowers 🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Reblog so bi women get flowers ❀

Autistic + bi moodboard 💜🌈

(img sources: x / x / x / x / x / x / x)

Like my moodboards? Request One / Support me on Kofi <3

Valkyrie Camellian Icons 🩷🌸💜💙

hey bestie, drop the original flag 👉👈🥺

Asami Sato bi icons 🩷💜💙

I recoloured/edited the original bi flag to have a lil more purple lighting 💜 but the meaning of the flag stays the same

Morally grey bisexual gf’s <3

The problem with commercial F/M romance is that it's written by the most heterosexual women alive and reading it you feel yourself slowly suffocating from the Gender of it all like a fish in a eutrophying lake. And what we actually need as a culture is F/M written by insane bisexuals violently allergic to heteronormativity

Bi women can’t talk about being in relationships with men because that’s seen as forcing heterosexuality upon gay and lesbian people. Bi women who previously identified as something other than bi can’t talk about the process of realizing they were bi because that’s seen as forcing heterosexuality upon lesbians. Bi women can only talk about being in relationships with women if they add 15 caveats about how they hate other bi women now and have discarded their bisexuality. Bi women in relationships with bi men or with lesbians have to swear up and down that they aren’t fetishizing their partners. 

Bi women can’t talk about being happy (either single or in a relationship) because then people will take that as us having no problems in the world. Bi people can’t talk about mundane issues such as media representation or language about bisexuals because that’s too trivial. Bi women can’t talk about their sex lives or wanting to be polyamorous because that’s seen as too dirty and too gross and too predatory. Bi women can’t produce or consume “sappy wuhluhwuh content” because that’s seen as defanging and disrespecting lesbian identity and yet they can’t talk about bisexual social alienation/trauma/invisibility/loneliness because “invisibility is a privilege” and because “those things are just stolen terms from gay and lesbian people”. 

Bi women can’t talk about being unicorn hunted on dating apps because apparently they don’t face that issue and instead perpetuate it and force lesbians to have threesomes with their male partners (apparently). Bi women can’t talk about intracommunity biphobia without being told that we aren’t radical for dating men and that LGBT spaces are safe gay spaces that we’d be invading. 

Bi women can’t call themselves gay even when they’re in gay relationships. Bi women can’t call themselves tops or bottoms even when they’re having regular gay sex. Bi women can’t call themselves queer because that’s a slur but oh wait, it’s okay when other people weaponize that word against us. Bi women can’t call themselves masc or femme because they’d be stealing those terms from lesbians but oh wait they can’t call themselves tomcats, does, or stags because those terms are cringeworthy imitations of butch/femme. Bi women can’t talk about gender expression without being told they’re appropriating “real” gay culture. Bi women can’t talk about femininity without being told they perform it for men and bi women can’t talk about masculinity without being told that being bi makes it impossible for them to be masculine. 

Bi women can’t talk about how unique relationships between bi women and bi men or bi women and bi women or bi men and bi men are. Bi women can’t call their relationships “bisexual” relationships because that’s somehow “anti-materialism”. Bi women can’t talk about loving their male partners because that’s anti-feminist but they can’t talk about hating men as a class or their trauma with respect to men without being told that it means they must actually be “lesbians suffering from comphet”. 

Bi women can’t talk about solidarity with LGBT people without being seen as selfish, nor can they talk about just bi women without being seen as selfish. 

Bi women can’t talk about the material, systemic, and sexual violence we face because apparently it isn’t real, no matter how much empirically validated proof we offer, and if we do talk about it, we’re stealing lesbian specific experiences or erasing lesbian specific experiences or trying to claim gay and lesbian specific experiences. 

Bi women can’t talk about our place in overall LGBT history (because we were apparently invented in 1998) and we can’t talk about bisexual history (because that’s *spins wheel* taking the focus off the REAL radicals in the community). 

Bi women have to be politically perfect all the time and have to allow people to scrutinize their personal lives and interpersonal relationships and sexual histories/traumas but it’s okay for people to not be in solidarity with us or to even offer us an ounce of empathy (and if we ask for it we’re whiny, selfish, and crying about non-issues). Bi women have to hate themselves and each other and hold each other responsible for all the world’s problems 24/7 but can never hold people responsible for biphobia. 

Bi women can’t even talk about any of these things on their own blogs, in their own spaces, on their own time, with other bi women, because that’s just too much.

There really is no winning. 

Recently I’ve been thinking about different components of sexual orientation, and how it is effectively formed of both internal identity and external behaviour. It’s interesting that, without a detailed conversation with other individuals, we can only assume their orientation and identity on the basis of their external behaviour, which is all that is visible to us.

For example, if someone is in a long term, committed, monogamous relationship with a member of the opposite sex, they are assumed to be straight, and their behaviour is interpreted as representative of heterosexuality. But they might be bisexual. If someone is in a long term, committed, monogamous relationship with a member of the same sex, they are assumed to be gay/lesbian, and their behaviour is interpreted as representative of homosexuality. But they might be bisexual.

In this context, what external behaviour could someone exhibit that would lead to the assumption they were bisexual, and therefore that their behaviour is representative of bisexuality? They’d have to be engaging with the same sex and the opposite sex more or less simultaneously in order not to be assumed to be straight or gay/lesbian. How might that work?

They could be having regular sex with multiple people of both sexes (bisexuals are promiscuous, bisexuals are easy, bisexuals are sluts). They could be having multiple concurrent and short term relationships with people of both sexes (bisexuals can’t commit, bisexuals will leave you for a member of the other sex). They could be having sex with people of both sexes at the same time (bisexuals are kinky, bisexuals have group sex, bisexuals want to have threesomes all the time). They could have a committed relationship with a member of one sex, and affairs with members of the other sex (bisexuals CHEAT). They could be non-monogamous and having various relationships with members of both sexes (bisexuals can’t be satisfied with just one person).

So. In order for other people to recognise you as a bisexual person, you have to be engaging in some form of stigmatised and nonconforming sexual activity, all of which just happen to be typical stereotypes about bisexuality. The only way to be perceived as a bisexual person is to conform with bisexual stereotypes. A bisexual person who doesn’t conform to a single bisexual stereotype cannot be perceived as a bisexual person, and therefore cannot disprove or undermine those stereotypes in the mind of the person perceiving them. Because if they don’t conform to a single bisexual stereotype, they are perceived as heterosexual/homosexual, and their nice, conforming, virtuous behaviour is ascribed to that perceived monosexual identity. Even if they had previously exhibited bisexual behaviour (bisexuality is just a phase, they’ll eventually pick a side).

Alternatively, they could verbally assert their identity regularly enough to offset the assumptions others make on the basis of their behaviour (bisexuals are self-obsessed).

There is no way of being consistently perceived as a bisexual person, in the current landscape, without reinforcing bisexual stereotypes in the minds of those perceiving you, because if you don’t align with and reinforce those stereotypes you are unperceivable as a bisexual person.