The First Time I Read Chapter 5 Of Your University AU, I Thought Brenda Wore Roller Skates As A Barista.

haley heynderickx, jo / arthur kearns via @obsob / minnie bruce pratt, the fact of the garden 

noelle skips class with the stoopids ❤️

Weird things I have done as an archaeologist

Washing cannonballs

Comparing human leg bones to my leg

Balancing knee caps to see if they’re left or right

Smashed my head on a drill handle while I tried to look cool dropping 3 meters of stainless steel down a hole

Trying to rescue mice out of the trench using a shovel and screaming how you’re trying to help

Glass still cuts skin, even after 500 years. And me being the dumbass I am to swipe my finger across to clean it

Getting distracted because you’re convinced these two pottery shards match in some place

Pushing my thumb into the decorative indentation a potter has made 300 years ago cuz I’m still a child

Trying to match shoe prints to one of your colleagues

Surely google knows the brand name on this 100 year old shoe shine can

Some HDG art I drew recently :)

Me wrapping up Christmas presents.

It always warms my heart to see this show get some love, it's criminally underrated. When I'm at work and nobody else is around I always seem to catch myself singing the "Archeologists" song from the first couple episodes

(Also I'm glad your cat is healing well, hope he's okay)

There is a World Doctor's quote for everything, I promise.

Also, Shadow is healing up well since I posted this :) He just decided to fist fight a raccoon at 17 years old or whatever, dumbass cat.

rip freakazoid you would’ve loved tumblr

I reblogged some great posts from Tiffany Amber’s blog, which you all should check out if you haven’t already. Really good stuff.

I’ve been focusing on different, non-Foodfight hobbies lately but I read the junior novelization in one sitting— it’s really fascinating. A huge thank you to our fellow fan for finding and scanning it.

I’d like to make some analysis posts about it later, too.. The breakdown on this blog is really good, but like. Can we talk about the failures of the fascism allegory? Brand X invokes Nazi imagery with the armbands and goose-stepping, but they’re introduced (even more obviously in the book) as ‘oh no! this is a New Thing, and changes to the status quo are scary! Everything was great the way it was!’ When really, appealing to tradition is more the fascist M.O… Shouldn’t Lady X have presented herself as a ‘traditional’ laundry detergent, and all the other brands as new things that don’t belong? Much to think about, when you take Foodfight as seriously as I do.

houseplant type friend

Compiler Log - Phaeophyta Maresell (5th Bloom) - January 18th, 2641 4:12 P.M. <Tags Hidden> Total Ingredients : 14

Produce, Terran Chicken (Breast). 3/4th lb Produce, White Onion. 1/2 whole Produce, Tomato (Roma). 1 whole Produce, Baby Corn (Cut). 4 oz Produce, Cilantro (Leaves). 1 tbs Produce, Green Onion. 2 tbs Oil, Canola. 3 tbs Milk, Terran Coconut. 28 oz Water, Pure. 2 cups Juice, Lime. 1/4 cup Spice, Cayenne Pepper (Ground). 1/4th tsp Spice, Tumeric (Ground). 1/2 tsp Spice, Tom Kha Paste. 2 tbs Sauce, Fish Sauce. 4 tbs ----------------------------------------------------------

Liz could feel her affini smiling down on her as she worked the can opener to dump the coconut milk into the big pot they were using. It was a soft, gentle sensation, like the sun on bare skin or the gentle clasping of hands. How had she ever lived without it? Even with her gaze firmly fixed on the metal cans turned upside-down in her grasp, the still-new haustoria cradling her nervous system let her bask in the delight of Phaeophyta's approval. It was a delicious sensation, and her mistress and her had decades and decades to learn everything it could do.

One of the cans fell from her hand as she stared blissfully ahead. Before she could even react, a vine reached out and caught it. Embarrassment flooded her. She had just barely recovered enough for Mistress to allow her back near the kitchen, and here she was, dropping things? Her head just still felt so woozy, her limbs too floppy, but she could help! She could, she could, she could! A sudden tingle of warmth sparked in her brain, and she turned her dazed vision up to her mistress. Phaeophyta had been talking to her! She smiled widely.

Stars, Phaeophyta thought. Her little Liz was just too cute! The poor thing clearly hadn't understood a word of her instructions, but that was to be expected. She'd seen enough florets fresh from receiving their haustoria to know how long the process took, and Liz needed another few days at least before returning to normal. But she had been ever so eager to help out, especially with her favorite food. And how could Phaeophyta say no to that adorable little pout? So here they were, her chopping all of the produce into little cubes and cooking thin ribbons of chicken in the oil while Liz poured the thai soup's base.

She lifted the soup can back into Liz's hand and brought out her best 'pay attention, cutie' voice. "Good job, Liz! You did so good with the coconut milk! Such a good, helpful girl for me!" Her floret practically glowed at the compliment, cheeks flushing, shoulders and hips rotating back and forth in an unbelievably cute little wiggle. Had it really been less than two years since they had gotten to know each other, when Liz had become her ward after she hit a depressive slump? It was incredible how much progress they had made together, how close the two had become, even before a grafting of her core tissue had snuggled up against the girl's brain. She could barely remember the hollow eyed stare, the defeated tone, the constant tears that had plagued those early weeks. Phaeophyta was an affini, and that meant taking care of all sophonts. But it was still always a good reminder to see how her work had paid off.

Liz was still staring up at her, eyes adoring, and Phaeophyta forced herself away from her thoughts. "Can you fill each of these cans with a cup of water for me?" Her floret nodded, excitedly, and began retracting her hands, but Phaeophyta kept her grasp on one can for a moment longer. "Remember, swirl around the water inside each one to get as much of the coconut milk as possible, and then dump it into the pot, okay?" Another nod, and she relinquished the can this time as it was pulled away. Hopefully her little one wouldn't get that too mixed up, but if she did, Phaeophyta would be right there to help. Forever and always.

Water splashed Liz's face and she sputtered, nearly dropping the cans again. She had shaken them too hard. It felt like her whole front was dripping with the cold water she'd spilled, and looking down, her dress definitely had splotches of coconut milk where the thicker globs had jettisoned themselves. Liz looked up at Mistress, eyes wet from multiple sources. Phaeophyta cooed, and cradled her face with the vines not engaged in cutting and frying. "There there, Lizzy-mine. It's okay. No harm done." One of her thumbs wiped away some of the water, and yet more vines broke off of the arm to take the cans away. Lizzy-hers gave them without struggle, melting into her mistress' touch. This was so much easier, warmer, and it made her brain sing.

"My sweet, sweet girl," she crooned, picking her up and cradling her close. The sweet girl let her eyes close and went limp, safe and happy, so close to the pulsing of Mistress' core. She heard Phaeophyta refill the cans with a cup of water each, and pour them in with the coconut milk. Then she curled deeper, and let sleep take her.

If Phaeophyta had a heart, it would have burst. As was, her core felt like it was overflowing with tenderness for the tiny bundle in her arms. Avoiding the temptation to drag Liz out, to stroke her and pet her and dress her up and so much beyond, was nearly agony. But the girl clearly still needed her rest, and Phaeophyta would survive, for now. She would just have to surprise Liz with the soup when she eventually woke up. Setting the milk and water to a medium heat, she let it boil before upending all the chopped produce, besides the cilantro and green onions, into the pot. The chicken, cooked white inside and out, was the next in, oil and all. As she worked, she shifted Liz closer and closer towards her core, until the darling floret was cradled right next to it, deep inside her chest.

Whether consciously or not, Liz reached out and wrapped her arms tight around it. Phaeophyta curled inwards, embracing her with everything she could. At the same time, she instructed the haustoria to dose the cutie with some class-z and a tiny bit of class-a. Liz would be out like a light, but there was no reason why they both shouldn't enjoy the nap as much as possible. Phaeophyta chucked slightly at herself, and let her vines gently knead and caress her floret while she finished up the meal. Tom kha paste, fish sauce, lime juice, and the spices were supposed to be added at the same time as the produce, but the brief delay was harmless. Besides, it all needed to stir and boil for about a quarter hour anyways while the onion cooked in the broth. So, with a contented sigh, she dragged a chair over to the kitchen and sat down in it, leaving one vine to idly keep the contents of the pot moving. Another vine reached off and grabbed a book in affini, "Kitchen Safety for Attentive Pet Owners."

Cooking had been one of Liz's few respites, once upon a time, and Phaeophyta had been happy to learn alongside her ward. But, and she would never admit this to Liz, the thought of her floret around sharp knives and hot stoves still occasionally filled her with anxiety. But she could get over that, for Liz's sake. If it would make her little one happy, she would learn. One of her vines brushed at Liz' nose, eliciting a tiny sneeze from inside her chest. Not for the first or last time that day, Phaeophyta smiled. Then she stood, pushed the cilantro and green onions into the soup, grabbed a steaming platter of rice and two bowls from the compiler, and prepared to wake her floret up. Dinner was served.