My Professor Spent Our Entire Seminar Whining About How There’s Too Many Girls In Our Group And Not

moleskine = bad

This one is so beautiful :’-(

it matters how this ends

‘cause what if i never love again?

Edit: This comic was originally made with Hozier’s ‘Nina Cried Power’ lyrics, which I didn’t realize was a song very specific to the Civil Rights movement. In retrospect, overlaying a comic of white lgbtq characters with these lyrics wasn’t a tactful decision. 

I’ve changed the lyrics to Hozier’s ‘ From Eden’ now, and I want to ask you guys to reblog this version instead. Thank you!

#goals 2025

Become Your Dream Girl in 2025

Defining your dream girl persona

The first step into becoming your dream girl is to have a clear picture of her in your mind. Imagine her life in detail; her aesthetic, her habits, and even her energy. This is the time to get specific.

Visualization Exercise: Sit in a quiet space, close your eyes, and visualize your dream girl persona. How does she dress? What places does she visit? What are her priorities and goals? Let yourself feel her confidence, luxury, and elegance.

Create a Vision Board: Gather photos, quotes, fabrics, and colors that represent this version of you. A physical board can go in your room or closet. It can even be a mini collage you can put on your driver's side mirror in your car. The goal is to see your dream girl's life as real and achievable.

Setting New Year Goals

Your dream girl's life needs structure, so let's break down goals into categories and map out the steps to make it happen.

Categorize Your Goals: List your goals under personal growth, style & beauty, health & wellness, and career & financial. For example, under "Health & Wellness", you might set a goal to try Pilates or to cook more at home.

Monthly Check-Ins: As you go through the year, check in with your goals to celebrate your wins, and adjust as needed. This keeps your transformation on track.

Mindset Makeover

Confidence & Self-Worth

Your dream girl is confident, magnetic, and knows her worth. Let's build those habits and thoughts that help you embody that energy daily.

Positive Affirmations: Every time you look in the mirror, say things like "I am worth everything good that can happen to me" or any affirmation that you feel suits you best.

Confidence Rituals: Small, daily actions add up to huge shifts in confidence. Make it a habit to dress up on casual days, speak kindly to yourself, and embrace good posture.

Let Go of Insecurities: Identify any insecurities and practice reframing them. Instead of "I wish I was more confident", say "I am becoming more confident every day". Over time, you'll notice how these subtle shifts impact your self-worth.

Mindset for Success

Your dream girl is resilient and always growing, so let's make success part of your mindset.

Growth Mindset: View challenges as chances to learn, whether it's a career move, a new hobby, or even a social situation.

Visualizing Success: Each morning, spend a few minutes visualizing yourself living your dream life. This will keep you focused and motivated.

Morning & Evening Routines: Start each day with intention by setting small goals and expressing gratitude. At night, reflect on the day and celebrate your wins; even the small ones.

Social Life & Relationships

Social confidence comes from feeling at ease in your own skin.

Elegant Etiquette: Show appreciation with thank you notes, and make an effort to remember names. The vibe for 2025 is to go for traditional, rather than modern. Think classic early 1920's-1950's Hollywood.

Curate Your Circle: Surround yourself with supportive, inspiring friends who uplift you. Leave the ones who don't elevate themselves or try to keep you behind.

Networking Lifestyle: Turn social gatherings into chances to meet like-minded people and to elevate your circle.

(Dating) Standards First: Don't settle; know what you deserve in a partner and communicate it confidently.

(Dating) Playful Energy: Be confident, flirty, and assertive (with yourself, not them). Stay in your feminine energy and let them earn your time and attention.

(Dating) Relationship Goals: Keep dates special and playful. Dress up, go out, and enjoy yourself.

Finances & Career Goals

Your dream girl values luxury, but also financial security. Your career is part of your dream girl identity, so elevate it.

Budgeting: Set aside money for luxuries and self-investment, but keep savings in mind.

Multiple Income Streams: Consider side hustles that align with your lifestyle.

Savings Goals: Whether it's for a designer bag, a trip, or just building wealth, make sure your goals are concrete.

Luxury Workspace: Make your workspace a vibe with candles, flowers, and chic decor.

Network for Success: Connect with mentors and people who inspire you.

Grow with Intention: Set milestones in your career or business, and keep pushing for the next level.

Health & Wellness

Your body is the vessel of your dream girl, so let's treat it with love and care. Mental clarity and peace are essential for dream girl energy; so let's focus on overall wellness this year.

Exercise: Try Pilates or Barre classes for a toned, elegant look. If that's not your thing, find workouts that create your dream body.

Healthy Eating: Focus on whole foods, lots of veggies, and drink tons of water.

Weekly Reset: Plan a mini detox day where you relax, hydrate, and reset for the week.

Mindfulness Practice: Try a short meditation or breathing exercise every morning.

Stress Relief: Whether it's a quick walk, journaling, or a creative outlet, find a stress relief that's all you.

Boundaries: Say no when needed, and make sure your energy is protected.

Beauty & Style Upgrade

First, a dream girl has that glow, and it all starts with a skincare routine that feels luxurious. You also need to find a style that captures your dream girl vibe, and commit to curating it. Then, you need to develop habits that will help you better your appearance.

Simple Skincare Routine (For Starters): Start with a cleanser for your skin type, followed by a hydrating toner, a serum (like Vitamin C for brightness), moisturizer, and SPF.

Luxury Treatments: Invest in facials or try gentle at-home treatments like dermaplaning once a month for an extra glow.

Nightly Routine: Keep your skin hydrated at night with a heavier moisturizer or an overnight mask.

Personal Style Icons: Think of someone like Serena van der Woodsen from Gossip Girl or a high-fashion model off-duty.

Curating Your Wardrobe: Focus on high-quality staples in neutral tones, like blazers, silky blouses, and tailored bottoms. Invest in timeless pieces that make you feel like a billion dollars.

Signature Look: A dream girl has her thing, whether it's an accessory, a makeup look, or a scent. Find what makes you feel like you and stick with it.

Self-Care Rituals: Prioritize manicures and pedicures, hair masks, and bubble baths. Set aside time every week to pamper yourself.

Polished Look: Even on your most casual days, aim to look put together.

Signature Hair & Makeup: Pick a go-to glam look that embodies your dream girl; maybe that's glossy lips and loose waves (for example).

Lifestyle & Daily Habits

Your routine should feel luxurious yet practical, setting the tone for each day. Small daily habits can transform how you feel and present yourself.

Weekly Pamper Sessions: Set aside Sunday evenings for facials, skincare, and champagne baths! (Be careful and make sure you're of legal drinking age)

Journaling and Reflection: Each morning, write down 3 things you're grateful for and 3 intentions for the day.

Goal Reviews: Every Sunday, celebrate your wins and see if any goals need a refresh.

The Basic Routine: Make your bed, wake up early, and put on an outfit that feels like you.

Energy-Boosting Habits: A quick stretch, a healthy breakfast, and a moment of quiet can make a huge difference.

Wind-Down Ritual: At night, unwind with tea, a bubble bath, or a short meditation to recharge for tomorrow.

Indulge a Little: Get a weekly coffee treat or a luxurious candle that makes your space feel cozy.

Luxury Experiences: Plan for a special outing every month, like a fancy dinner or spa day.

Signature Scents and Cocktails: Find your go-to perfume and a signature drink like a dirty martini or a bubbly glass of champagne.

Conclusion:

Becoming your dream girl is a journey; one that's glamorous, fulfilling, and full of growth. Each step brings you closer to living the life you deserve.

This! Thank you @entirelytookeen :)

How come you didn’t ship bellarke before clexa happened, and now that clexa is finished, why not ship bellarke? I’m just curious and also a little envious as our fandom does not have as good writers as you (yes I am a bellarke shipper)

I confessed in a post about why I love Bellamy that when I started the show, I did so because I found the aesthetic and premise appealing, but I’d first heard noise about it because there was a really popular femslash pairing. (This was midway between season two.) I thought, “with my luck the dynamic between the girls will be boring twee sweetness and I’ll end up shipping the heroine with this goober I can tell is CW-flavored endgame from the first ten minutes of the pilot. Because I already love that goober.”

But I was wrong! Not just about how Clexa played out, but also about Bellamy and Clarke, as I further expand on in that post about him. I tend to ship characters who believe in the same thing, but have wildly different approaches to how to get it – so the fundamental understanding between them is there, but the tension between their methodologies leads to interpersonal friction that (hopefully) leads to better mutual understanding. (I didn’t sit down and decide I would do it this way, of course, I’ve just noticed a pattern.) That’s Clexa in a nutshell.

But it’s not Bellamy and Clarke – they’re the polar opposite in my opinion. They believe and strive for very different things, and all they share is an investment in propping up the system they believe will lead to their different goals, or prioritizing the people who will do the same. If anything I anti-ship them, not because of silly fandom squabbles but because I think they bring out the worst in each other if unchecked. 

So much of their interaction in seasons one and two (again, I stopped watching after three and I’m completely uninterested in any other seasons, so please don’t write me saying I’m “wrong” because of them) leads to the most grim and traumatic outcomes: Lincoln’s torture, pulling the lever at Mount Weather, even Bellamy’s undercover mission and the fall of TonDC. They weren’t the only variables at work in those situations, of course. But because of their lack of similar ethos but shared logos, when it’s just the two of them? In close quarters? That’s when bad shit goes down. 

To be fair, this is also why I like them as friends. They’re both carrying really deep emotional scars from life on the Ark, so they’re kinda like… trauma buddies. The emotional abuse they’ve both suffered really has removed their sense of when to put on the breaks, as it were, and I like the idea that they can look at each other and say, “thank goodness for someone else who realizes there is no such thing as constancy, or permanent safety, all we really have are coping methods that help us get better at pretending. Someone else who will do, quite literally, whatever it takes.” But at brass tacks this is a really poisonous worldview, as even their behavior acting as individuals can back up. And while I like the idea they can look at each other and feel less alone to see someone who is broken in similar ways, if I want them to heal, they need to be shaken up and shaken out of it. 

I don’t think they’re capable of doing that for each other. Together, Bellamy and Clarke tend to fall back into old, Ark-era roles or patterns of behavior – understandable, since they’ve been conditioned to see each other in those roles since birth. (Even when they fight, they’re more fighting the ideas of each other left over from the Ark.) Turning that into a romance feels like romanticizing those abusive systems, i.e. “their love cancels out their trauma.” And I have to be honest, the fandom surrounding them seems to buy into that, with the whole “she’s his princess, he’s her soldier” shtick which I find… repellent.

(not to bash your ship, bunny, but you did ask)

So I was never going to ship them, regardless. And even now, the thought of them ending up together is less upsetting because of Lexa’s presence or lack thereof, and more because Raven and Bellamy are the clear standouts as a (still-living) couple: thematically, narratively, and even in terms of actor chemistry. If Bellamy and Clarke are endgame, it’s just another nail in the coffin of incredibly poor writing and tone-deaf characterization that led to the show becoming unwatchable in its third season. (Instead of, again, Lexa’s presence or lack thereof.) When I used to get angry at the thought of Clarke and Bellamy together, it’s because I believed the show was better than that; I don’t anymore, and that’s what makes me sad. 

… so now that’s cleared up, let me take a moment. 

Not to rap your knuckles or anything, but Clexa is not “over.” I’m sure you were just speaking in terms of continuance in canon… but still. I’m going to take this opportunity to put it out there that coming into the blog of someone who so (passionately) ships two female characters and asking them, if one was killed off, why they don’t just switch to the heterosexual pairing that involves the character left standing, is not a good look! I’m flattered you like my writing so much and I’m going to take your question as the compliment I’m sure you meant it, but I feel like I would be doing you something of a disservice if I gave the impression that it didn’t also cross a line.

Even if you missed my posts on what an amazing, perspective-shifting experience it’s been for me as a lesbian to write romances between two women for an audience who is hungry for exactly those stories, this remains a Not-Good Look. Considering the rate at which lesbian and bisexual female characters are killed off, taking their deaths as a reason to stop shipping – as in, stop celebrating their stories and love, stop writing the potential that was unexplored, stop honoring what pieces of representation they did provide and why death does not impact its importance – would basically mean the death of femslash fandom as a whole. Which is exactly what the wrong kind of people want. Especially the predominantly male, cis, white, and heterosexual showrunners who see any story that is not an extension of their own lived experience or reflective of how their experiences are the best and should be taken as universal. (#notallmaleciswhitehetshowrunners) 

I think shipping as activism is misguided, but at the same time I can believe that an audience caring about the “wrong” couples is a finger in the eye of people who make their livings persuading others that whiteness and heterosexuality are the only valuable commodities. Those people are genuinely threatened by an audience who wants the girl to get the girl, or who rallies around heterosexual couples where not just one but both characters are played by actors of color. Because American television is very much part of the capitalist machine, and if they can’t use it to skew the value of concepts they feel they “own” – that the main dude has to prioritize the white female lead over all other romantic prospects, that the bisexual heroine can suffer interestingly in relationships with other women but her happy endgame has to be with a dude – they have to fall back on things like writing talent, and, well. 

I’m wandering into the weeds a bit, but my point stands: if I stop shipping the characters I love just because the people in charge decided one of them had to die, the terrorists win it would be antithetical to fandom itself. A large part of the purpose of fandom is to reclaim popular narratives from those who would use them to toxic ends, to prove that systematic privilege does not mean you get to completely dictate the destinies of those who lack it – even in fiction. 

So they killed Lexa. That’s within their purview. But that can’t touch Clexa. It would be an error to translate their mistakes as impact. Or to believe their actions should, in any way, guide my own. 

Day 8: favourite trope to read or write and is there a difference in reading or writing that trope.

Hmmm … a very good question! I recently read the Phedre trilogy by Jacqueline Carey. After reading the first book, Kushiel’s Dart, my life and writing has been rendered transformed. The books are written in first person and the detail of the world building and the twists in the plot are exquisite. Reading this trilogy has pushed me to reconsider the roller coaster plot structure and approach my current wip into something more interesting. Hopefully I can be at least a quarter as successful as Carey. If you have not read her stories, I highly recommend them.

In the trilogy, the tropes of “enemies to lovers” and “lovers to enemies” is explored. It is so beautifully done! In my current wip, I’m working on lovers to enemies for my main character. A character who is also a flawed hero with a heart of gold.

Wish me luck!

Let me just add some color to the wlw side of tumblr…

There’s one actress in this post who has played a queer character on three… not one not two, three different shows

Pi

I keep seeing this on facebook and the freemasons are reducing the image quality so I thought I’d upload it here and see

Bellamy Blake was killed by Clarke? Maybe I will start watching the 100 again ... just have to catch up from season 3