Fuck Sirius Being Anti-jegulus

“No Sirius, we agreed we would do Centaurs next week.”

“But Centaurs are cool.”

“They’ll be cool next week.”

“Oh wow, professor lupin everybody. Centaurs are only cool when HE wants them to be.”

“You know that’s not what I’m saying. We already planned this wee-“

“The rest of the class agrees that we should do Centaurs this week”

“LITERALLY NO ONE SAID THAT”

“I COULD FEEL IT IN THEIR ENERGY”

“WHAT DOES THAT MEAN???”

The class: *tired because this happens every week*

Imagine if both Remus AND Sirius got the chance to co-teach Defence Against the Dark Arts??

Omg absolutely do it, it’s 100% worth it

the urge to write a jegulus fanfic even tho i’m not sure it would be any good

Plus he’s a pure blood so you know Voldy’s all over that shit

Personally? I love the idea of Voldemort starting to see Regulus as a bit of a threat even without knowing he's onto the Horcruxes. Like, they're a little too similar. Regulus is just as handsome and charming and charismatic and smart as Tom Riddle was at that age, and he's also the wealthy well-connected pureblood heir Tom pretended to be. He's like Voldemort-plus. And that could become a problem.

So I’ve been thinking

Quidditch car wash fundraiser

I don’t know why they would ever need the money or why they would wash muggle technology for it. But just ignore that.

The school would never allow them to be sexy because they are c h i l d r e n, but you know James and Sirius would be constantly wiping their brows with their shirts just to show off their abs.

Remus and Peter would handle the money but then Sirius and James would convince them to participate too. (Sirius just wanted to see Remus’ muscles at work)

All the house teams would have to do it which causes a lot of problems. They would constantly be spraying water at each other, throwing rags and sponges, fighting over the music, and too many people would end up with soap in their eyes.

All the pure bloods (regulus) would be terrified of touching a muggle device that’s “sure to explode at any moment”. Regulus would end up getting put on money duty. Since he doesn’t know how muggle money works people severely under pay. He was also incredibly distracted by the show the practically shirtless James was putting on.

The minute the last car was washed James and Sirius would take off their shirts just to show off. Remus and Regulus had a cardiac arrest at that point.

It would pretty much just be a shit show and they would never raise enough money. And everyone got to watch them all waddle back into the castle soaked head to toe looking like drowned rats.

sorry i talked about jegulus for six hours do u still wanna kiss

Regulus Black Headcanons

He was extremely pale but when he blushed his whole face turned red. He hated it, especially because of how easy it was to make him blush

He had hemophilia (as a product of inbreeding). Something about it just makes sense.

He resembled his father while Sirius resembled their mother. He was quiet, reserved, and was often seen as apathetic. (But he could scream like a fucking banshee, he had to get something from his mother)

He’s the kind of person to kick you when your down b/c he thinks it’s really funny. He only does it to his friends b/c he knows they can take it but he definitely talks shit about other people to them. Like, Barty would get a really shit grade on a test and Reg would say, “Well at least you’re good looking, oh WAIT”and run out before Barty can throw something at him.

He reads muggle books and enchants the covers so no one knows.

He lies about his favorite book genre because it’s trashy romance.

He was a hat stall because he was having a whole conversation with himself in his head and the hat couldn’t get a word in. After five minutes of him weighing the pros and cons of each house he says to the hat ‘okay, put me in Ravenclaw’. The hat stays silent for a second and screams ‘SLYTHERIN’

Regulus can hold a grudge like a BITCH. He’s still mad at the hat for not going with his decision (even though he knows it was right)

He had a hard time growing hair when he was little and was really insecure about it. Just imagine him with the worst little rat moustache.

He took pride in his hygiene. He had a skin and haircare routine, flossed, and moisturized. He clipped his nails and made sure they looked nice (or tried to since he bit his nails a lot). He even brought silk pillowcases to school.

He wrote music. You can’t convince me other wise. This bitch played piano and violin, two of the hardest instruments to learn, and wrote pieces for both of them.

He bit his nails. He thought it was really disgusting because he hated germs but he wouldn’t realize he was doing it until he was three nails in.

He absolutely had a blanky when he was little. He slept with it but hid it from his dorm mates in his first year. Bellatrix set it on fire and Regulus didn’t leave his room for weeks.

Tw: toxic behavior, manipulation, trauma

I feel like Regulus is the most manipulative dick out there.

His entire existence was just lying.

He was taught from an early age how to repress his emotions. His parents and governesses would always make him repeat things back to them over and over again until they felt he learned his lesson.

He’s incredibly observant so he figures out people’s personalities (and insecurities) really quickly. He just automatically mimics their personality when they’re with him so he can get people to trust him.

He can use all of it to get people to do whatever he wants. Through blackmail, manipulation, gaslighting, or thinly veiled threats (because the Blacks always keep it classy).

However, he usually doesn’t rely on other people. He just does it himself.

So, basically, he can do a lot of damage, he just chooses not to. It makes him feel secure to know everyone’s secrets and to know exactly how to keep them complacent if the need ever arises.

Obviously learning this trait at such a young age (literally from birth) caused him to never fully understand who he was. It made him feel emotionless, less than human.

Sirius also learned how to mimic people’s behavior which was why he was always so much more vibrant when he was with James and super quiet with Remus, but soon realized that he didn’t have to hide (and it’s super unhealthy to do) so he quickly unlearned it.

Songs I think scream Regulus Black (I will add more over time)

I can’t handle change - Roar

Burning pile - Mother Mother (specifically in Choices)

Coraline - Måneskin

Can you feel my heart - Bring me the horizon

The winner takes it all - Abba (jegulus)

Do me a favour - Arctic Monkeys

Work song - Hozier

Sign of the times - Harry Styles (some of the lines are actually arguments they had had and “stop crying baby it’s the sign of the times” is actually something Sirius would say to Regulus when they were little it’s a whole thing)

My eyes adored you - Frankie Valli (I just think he would’ve really liked this song)

No lights on the horizon - Metric (jegulus)

Another sad love song - Khalid (also specifically Choices)

Do I wanna know - Arctic Monkeys (Jegulus)

Planets of the universe (demo) - Stevie Nicks (listen to it once and tell me you don’t hear Regulus singing it)

Fake you out - Twenty one pilots (yes I was a stan what about it)

Lust to love - The Go-Go’s (James’ pov of Regulus in Carpe Noctem)

Aircatcher - Twenty-one pilots (specifically chapter 33 of carpe noctem)

You’re gonna go far, kid - the offspring

When I Was Your Man - Bruno Mars (Reg’s feelings towards Jily)

Losing my religion - REM

people out here better not be telling me it’s “unrealistic” for james potter and regulus black to be romantically involved and then go and ship hermione with any overage man in the entire harry potter series

*tw child abuse

I like the thought of the one time Regulus helps Sirius is the night Sirius leaves.

Like, Walburga and Sirius are having this raging fight and as usual Regulus sits by the stairs and waits for it to be over.

As the fight starts to get violent he can hear Sirius fight back (which only started that summer)

He thinks Sirius is stupid and is only making it worse but it doesn’t help the anxiety of knowing one of them will get hurt. He just wants it all to stop.

He hears someone crash to the ground while his mother is still screaming curses. He’s scared out of his mind but his mother’s curses are slowly getting more severe and Sirius isn’t responding. He slowly gets up and walks to the parlor.

He realizes that he can hear Sirius, but it’s just whimpers. He doesn’t think about it too hard though. He doesn’t think about how he doesn’t have his wand on him. He doesn’t think about how he’s supposed to wait by the stairs. He doesn’t think about it when he stands in front of Sirius for the first time and disarms his mother from across the room. Right before she could utter the unforgivable. Her wand disappears from her hand. Into oblivion, Reg hopes.

He wanted it to stop. So he made it stop. But now he needs time to start up again so he can get the fuck out of there.

Sirius is bruised from head to toe but Reg manages to get him up the stairs. Sirius is only half conscious but he has a purpose as he stops leaning on him at the top of the stairs and starts ransacking his room.

Sirius can’t believe it. Reg did it. He stood up to the old hag. He’d been waiting for the right time to leave and this is just perfect. He doesn’t bother with clothes, James will have plenty. He grabs his school things and all his pictures. Starting with one of him and James on his wall and slowly making his way to the one of Moony on his bedside table.

“Come on Reggie, get a move on” Sirius throws over his shoulder. Reg’s just been standing there in shock.

Regulus is still at the top of the stairs. He can hear Sirius’ scuffling around his room and his mother’s scrambling for her wand downstairs. The sounds are quiet but loud. Eerily similar to one another.

“What are you doing?”

“We’re getting out of here.”

“What do you mean?”

Sirius finishes packing and turns back to Regulus. “Come with me. To James’. We can get out of here. We can leave.”

Sirius looks manic as he grabs Reg and takes them to his room. Sirius starts to grab his stuff and shove it into his bag. He’s breathing heavily, trying to shove down the panic.

“I know we haven’t gotten on very well these last few years… but we can fix it all now. Help me get all your stuff.”

“We can’t leave.” Regulus stills Sirius’ hands with his own. “Are you crazy? Mum will have a fit if we leave.”

“She won’t be able to find us.”

“She’ll know where you went. He’s your best friend.” Regulus knows all too well how close James and Sirius are. Practically brothers, as they say.

“Reg,” Sirius is firmer now, “I’m leaving now. With or without you.”

Sirius makes his way to Regulus’ window. He just has to open the window and leave. “Sirius, don’t go.”

It’s Regulus’ turn to panic. “Just stay. I’m sure it’ll all be fine. If we just apologize-“

“No Reg. No more. I can’t stay here.” Sirius opens the window and begins to clime out.

Regulus grabs his hand. “Sirius please. Sirius just stay. Don’t go. It’ll all be fine, just stay, please. Sirius I’m so scared. » Regulus’ voice fades at the end, but Sirius hears it nonetheless. He grabs him and they wrap their arms around each other for the final time. « You’ll never be what they want you to be. They’ll never be satisfied. »

Regulus doesn’t answer. they always had differing opinions.

They pull back from each other but Sirius holds Regulus’ face, remembering the last time he saw him as his brother. « Goodbye, Reggie. »

Regulus wanted to say so much. Don’t go. Come back to me someday. Don’t let this be goodbye. Good luck. I can’t lose you.

I love you

« Goodbye, brother. »

Sirius would’ve grabbed Regulus and forced him out the window. He would’ve tried harder when James blocked the front door as he tried to go back for him. But Regulus had proven himself. He had shown that he could stand up to their mother.

That was the first time Regulus had stood up for what was right. The second time, well, I’m sure you can guess the second time, was the last time.