Im  Sure Everyone And Their Dad Have Drawn This Pic Before But I Dont Care I Love Kai

part two

Pondering about how Kai has made his power a part of his identity so much that it’s become a point of complete toxicity to himself . Without his power, he spirals into an immense self destructive phase, undervaluing himself to a total zero.

We continuously see how highly he depends on his powers, titles (green ninja, fire maker, etc), people (wu, social followers) to determine his self worth. Not to mention his cocky and prideful persona in front of others is likely a ‘safety system’ he derived for himself so he is not taken advantage of, or left behind (credits to his childhood). After all, confidence and pride (to a certain extent, of course) are considered attractive qualities to look up to, admire, and not necessarily to mess with.

He’s constantly trying to do as much as he can in so many different things, trying to prove his worth. Because he does not know who he is without them. Without people. Without titles. Without powers. He believes that just truly being himself is not of any value to those around him, and that if he cannot be of service he is absolutely worthless.

I needed to do this, that's all. (I also wanted to do one about Kai's hair but could find the picture of him in anime style 😔)

Let my baby shine in next season please 😔

(If he looses again his power again, I am going to commit arson 👁️👄👁️🕯️)

Kai Version: Isn't it so incredibly interesting how both smith siblings handled their trauma in drastically different ways?

Kai  has low self esteem/self worth (depends on people, powers, and statements to determine his value), constantly needs to prove himself, and is immensely dependent on external validation (his obsession social media is a prime example of this). He invalidates himself, dismissing his emotions/feelings, and needs regular reassurance (tendency to blame out-of-control situations on himself, likely derived from the mindset that his parents purposely left him because he wasn't good enough, and i’ll bet my soul he stayed awake  nights wondering that if nya was firstborn, would his parents still leave?) .

His fear of being useless is also likely derived from that same mindset and as such he portrays himself through a cocky/prideful ‘persona’. This is false portrayal of himself, simply to appear stronger in the eyes of others, because if others think he’s of value they won’t leave him, because with or without this ‘mask’ not even he knows who is truly is.

He tends to dissociate during emotionally intense/overwhelming situations, or go into a state shock/confusion. He developed unhealthy coping mechanisms (violently self destructive) with situations regarding loss and grief. All of these things are results of and/or mechanisms he developed from his childhood trauma.

but. despite everything i’ve written above.  he loves nya. raised her. protects/supports her. took lloyd under his wing. he loves lloyd. throws heaps of physical affection towards cole. he loves cole. accepted jay as a brother in law, was so supportive of jaya and helped jay in proposing. he loves jay. makes things fun for zane, reassures him. he loves zane. showed master wu to believe in himself. he loves wu. he loves his entire team and expresses it in ways that value each of them individually. he makes friends with dragons. he loves dragons. he taught/worked with kids. he loves kids. despite what the disappearance of his parents did to him and nya, despite nya’s refusal to show her parents love (valid, btw) kai loved maya. he loved ray.  he loved his parents all over again, he loved his parents again so easily. he loved and loves and keeps loving.

trauma gave him self-destructive mechanisms. trauma instilled insecurity in him. trauma took away his sense of self worth. trauma emptied him of self-love. trauma stole his sense of identity. but kai held on to the ability to protect others, to care for others, to help others. he held them close to his chest. because like hell he’d let his trauma take that.

kai refused to let trauma strip his ability to love. his ability to love is unmatched.

Inspired by this post:

https://sugarglider-s.tumblr.com/post/692022087001473024/every-single-day-of-my-life-i-think-about-how-kai

[Cole, Ray, and Kai hanging out in the kitchen]

Kai: oh hold up let me get you a plate

(Climbs on the counter like a five year old)

Cole: Kai?

Kai frustrated because he still can’t reach: what?

Cole: you want some help?

Kai: shut up cole I can do it myself dickhead

Ray: Haha wow kid I didn’t think you’d come out this short. Wonder we’re you got that from? Your mom and I are pretty tall.

Kai: Well yeah that’s what malnutrition will do to you

-heavy silence-

-Rays face of horror and realization-

Cole barely holding back laughter: kai what did you just say?

Kai: Malnourishment is a bitch.

Kai getting off the counter: haha! Finally! Stupid plate-

Turns around to see Ray face and Cole laughing his ass off

Kai: uh? Did I miss something?

I don't think so either Zane

They have the same reaction and facial expressions when they realize that Lloyd is missing.

(У них одинаковая реакция и выражение лица, когда они понимают, что Ллойд пропал.)

Koko and Kai are very worried moms

(Коко и Кай - очень обеспокоенные мамы)

Headcanon's time

On Father's Day and Mother's Day, Nya and Lloyd give Kai his favorite buns to congratulate the man who raised them and always supported them.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to the best green boy!!