There Was A Lot Of Dylan On Tanner’s Story Today And Since Dylan Quit Posting Himself It’s The Best

*Pump activated, initiating non-stop semen extraction*

Tanner was chained up by his wrists, huffing and puffing as his "wranglers" pulled his cock out and waggled the floppy meat around, chuckling sadistically while telling him what a "productive bull" he was going to be once they got him hooked up to the "pump" for his "milking"...

Love it when Tanner needs throwbacks photos of him and Dylan to fill out his story.

File under: "cocky e-boys who need to be repeatedly drained of all their nut"

Tanner’s latest video, “I Learned To Scuba Dive To Find My Lost GoPro,” is a masterpiece. Still missing a camera he lost in summer 2015 at Table Rock Lake, Tanner decided to get certified for scuba diving, completing the initial test the day before leaving for Hawaii, where the most cinematic parts of the video take place. Tanner completes his certification, swims with sea turtles and manta rays and then goes cliff jumping, the original purpose of the trip. Then, upon returning to Kansas he finds a diver willing to help him search the lake where the GoPro was lost in the cold of November. They didn’t find it, but Tanner clearly gained more on the journey than the lost footage he was looking for.

POV: you're just asking to be wrangled off to a bull barn where your pits will be tickled and eaten out as you thrash against your chains and a mechanical milker rhythmically pumps all the thick cream fresh from your balls

Another reason that would have thwarted Theo’s plan: Scott wouldn’t have been so smitten with Theo if Isaac was around. That’s a bond that would be harder to break. Isaac wouldn’t turn away from Scott for anything, and he didn’t have anyone else to go to if he was even thinking about it. Would be interesting to see Theo working on it, but even if Theo managed to convince Isaac that he’d seduced Scott into cheating on him, I think Isaac would stay loyal. And as long as Scott had Isaac, he wouldn’t get to a point where he felt like Theo was the only one he could count on.

NPFP made me wonder something: what do you think would have happened had Jackson and Isaac been around for season 5?

I'm pretty sure Theo wouldn't have succeeded. Sure, Theo would've most likely wrapped Scott around his little finger because Scott is a moron when it comes to trusting strangers, but Stiles would've never been alienated from the pack because Isaac and Jackson wouldn't trust Theo over Stiles — mostly because they have common sense and are aware that you do not trust people, who you just met and who record your girlfriend sleeping, over your best friend. They provably also wouldn't have cared that Stiles killed someone.

After Ethan and Aiden and Peter and Matt, and Allison going rogue, Isaac would've rather eaten his scarf before trusting the new random werewolf that showed up the second shit got weird.

And Jackson? I mean, he spent weeks listening to Stiles babbling on and on about how weird Matt is. He also spent a lot of time with Stiles in a van, telling him exactly what he is. Plus, Lydia is Stiles' best friend, so there's that too.

But yeah, I don't think Theo would've been able to accomplish anything.

Dylan’s cousin got married and so Tanner, Dylan and Tristan went to the wedding and then had a party bus, where Tanner did some pole dancing after getting a drink spilled on him.

Tanner had a lot of good pictures to share to mark his starting creatine again.

Tanner is getting back to his routines after recent travels but the Midwest Meetup which is usually close to his birthday is coming up. Usually this means a lot of cute flippers show up in Kansas.