I Had To Let My Baby Go. My Mind Is Just So Mentally Exhausted And Drained. The Way I Just Want To Sleep

It was bad, you didn't stop crying, you began to struggle to breathe, your vision fading and they had to call an ambulance. John stayed back with Simon, making Gaz ride with you in the ambulance, but you were delirious, gasping out Simon's name again and again.

John sat Simon down, "We're gonna get Makarov."

"Won't make it peaceful." Simon said gruffly.

"You have her to look after, can she really handle you being deployed again?" John looks at Simon intently. "I'll have Laswell set something up, but Simon-" He looks solemn. "-Laswell, all Laswell said is that she is hanging on by a thread. A fucking thread."

On solo missions, Johnny would be your company when Simon was deployed, he was fiercely loyal to Simon, therefore to you too. But now he's dead, and that bubble of hope, that it wouldn't be any of them, popped. Reality breaking you.

Simon rubbed his face, taking off his balaclava, "I love her, so much."

----

At the hospital, you were sedated and coming to wasn't fun, you were so groggy, so exhausted.

"Hey." Your eyes turned to the side to see Kyle.

"Kyle?" Your voice coughed out. He nodded, leaning forward.

"You had a panic attack, you stopped breathing." Your eyes are glassy, head achy, you nod slightly. "Should I call Simon?" Your heart rate spikes.

"Yes." You gasp out, all you can think is 'is he alive?' and your chest tightens.

----

When Simon comes in with John by his side, you gasp out in relief. "Simon."

"I'm here," He sits next to you, brushing hair out of your face, stroking your face. "Why didn't you tell me before?"

"It's nothing compared to what you've been through Si." It grates him, it's technically true, but that's not fair to compare your issues to his.

"So? What, you gonna not tell me? Your heart nearly gave out? What, leave me to come back and find you dead? That it?" He hisses. It's the most talkative he's been, his eyes squint in anger. "I fucking love you."

Kyle and John leave the room.

"Sorry." You murmur out. Simon shakes his head.

"We'll sort something out until Makarov's dead." He presses his lips to yours.

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