Dear M,

This could go two ways:

Internal organ rearrangement speedrun

or

Internal organ addition speedrun

you’re stuck living with your icon for a month have fun

I mean.

reblog this if your icon could kill a man

HEAVY X MEDIC HEADCANONS

OKAY! GUESS WHO ACCIDENTALLY DELETED THE ASK SOMEHOW? I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I DID BUT IT THANOS SNAPPED ITSELF WHEN I PRESSED TAB SO.

Edit: Okay, so apparently it posted itself, that’s why. Here’s the ACTUAL post.

I’m glad I took a screenshot, I had a feeling this would happen.

@drjamjams​

Thank you so much for the kind words! I’m so stoked to be able to do this, and it means the world to me that people are enjoying my writing!

I do hope that this rewrite isn’t too messy. This is the ask that I lost yesterday, I did my best to recover what I could and add some extra!

Yall, please give me tips on how to wrangle this site. But without further adieu...

HEAVY X MEDIC

Medic had his eyes on Heavy from the beginning. Hell, who wouldn’t? An absolute bear of a man, stoic but kind hearted, caring for his sisters in Russia.

It was rare before he had met this man to have ever been respected for his work. Most of the time he would deflect comments with an alarming smile and a morbid joke (or by inserting extra organs inside of them next time he had the chance, though it could be argued that he does that to everybody), so when Heavy treated the doctor with respect from day one, he was smitten.

Smitten? Medic had no clue what his feelings meant. Perhaps it was a side effect of surgically adding those souls to his own body, but he couldn’t help being a bit less wound up around his comrade, even going so far as to tell stories of his own past in exchange for theirs.

Misha, on the other hand, never noticed this until the other mercenaries pointed out the clear favoritism. Even then, he assumed it was because they were good friends. Until they hit the battlefield, when they became gods.

Medic, quite like the Engineer, is practically nocturnal. He has no time to waste in his eyes, he has too many organs, experiments, surgeries to conduct. This man will manage to cram a surgery between two autopsies within the span of a few hours, but this means he will hardly eat or sleep until he’s satisfied with his latest abomination.

Why do I bring this up? It’s because Medic tends to crash outside of the med bay. A lot. 

Heavy is frequently the first to notice, and becomes something of a guard dog. He paces the halls, any and every noise swiftly shut down by a steely glare. 

Likewise, if Heavy is the one to crash, be it on a couch, the floor, or slumped over a table, the doctor will carry this man to bed. You’d be surprised what lugging around a heavy metal backpack and a medi-gun will do for your strength. Ludwig basically Disney-princess style wrangles his birds and helps lift him back to bed.

Once, Scout tried to pull a prank while Medic was passed out after one of his many week-long all-nighter streaks.

It’s safe to say Ludwig was not ecstatic to wake up to a medical emergency. This is something Scout will never overshare about.

If Heavy is being pocketed by Medic that day, expect to be stuck in respawn for the entire match. Not that it would matter, the team will still win! The two are an ubercharge machine.

Heavy is the only one who is allowed to pet Archimedes and the doves. Medic trusts that Misha won’t harm them or accidentally crush them.

It’s mesmerizing for the doctor to watch. It’s as if his large, calloused fingers become light as feathers, gently holding the little angels with such care, petting them in just the right places. The doves practically flock to Heavy whenever he enters the infirmary nowadays.

Likewise, Archimedes and Medic are the only ones allowed to touch Sasha. There’s nothing else to say here.

Heavy only ever shares his sandviches with Medic! Sometimes, Scout will badger him to convince Heavy to share with the others, too. Scout will also never overshare about the incident that followed. Starting to see a pattern here?

Matching pajamas. No, I will not elaborate.

Any chore list there is, Misha and Ludwig immediately pair up. If they change, they still insist on being together. During the change to the kitchen list (all mercs pair up save for spy, designated to a week in which they cook for the rest of the team), they immediately reach across the table towards each other, A gloved hand fit snug on top of that of the gentle giant.

“HEAVY IS WITH DOKTOR! NOT CHANGE THIS.” - Ten’s a crowd, chapter 8 I think. One that hasn’t been published at the time of writing this.

They’ll cuddle together on one of the couches if they know they have privacy from the rest of the mercs. Medic also uses Heavy’s lap as a pillow. Does this hurt his shoulders? Probably. Does he care? Nope. This man is stubborn and it shows.

Heavy is the little spoon. I rest my case.

I think the TF2 mercs take turns giving pep talk to the team before match, and they almost equally suck at it. Soldier is too patriotic, Engie - too strategic, Spy - too pretentious, that sort of thing.

The only person whose speeches the team actually loves is Demo. He makes no sense but he puts his entire soul and pussy into it. He says shit like "Lads... Today ya have'ta ask yerself... are ya a man? Or an imitation of man? D'ya go oot there with fire in yer eye and fight in yer soul, or d'ya yield like a sorry buncha loosers?! A' say today we take all th'bombs and rockets and shove them up the BLU's arses! Thus begins our thousand year reign of blood!" and everyone loses their goddamn mind.

HEADS UP

Might mess with tumblr codes and stuff. Expect my page to be broken or ugly for a while, maybe ever a day or more if I’m lazy! Tryna figure out how this place differs from toyhouse with css and html coding. 

Love ya’ll, stay safe, drink water, and I’ll see you in the next post!

Follow the bouncing flames

With the release of the Jungle Inferno update, Valve left many test attributes in the game code. Some of these were designed to make the Pyro’s flames reflect off of surfaces. A few years later, two very humble geniuses named Gamemaster and Gray found the attributes and implemented them in a plugin called Alternative Fortress, giving the Backburner the ability to bounce flames off walls.

For the record, I actually had nothing to do with this. It’s solely GM’s work, and he deserves full credit. (This does nothing to reduce my genius and/or humility.)

Anyway, this is what I’ll be talking about today: reflecting flames.

Keep reading

Fanart of a beautiful moment :)

(did the mercs ever change appearance save for the splits? if so i can fiX IT i just wasn’t sure)

@talk-to-the-mercs​ has a rlly good story goin on! Might put some posts I make here into context bc i reference it sometimes-

YOOOOO SNIPER welcome back mate! it's been a while, innit? we all missed you something terrible! how're you feeling?

Sniper: [giggling]

Engineer: Whatcha laughin’ about, Snipes?

Sniper: [laughing] Batman.

Engineer: That anesthetic is really hittin’ ya hard, huh?

Sniper: Nah, barely scratched me...I gave ‘im the ol’ one two...

Engineer: When’s this stuff gonna wear off?

Medic: A few hours to a day, depending on zhe pain and functionality of the heart.

Scout: Maybe we can tote him around like on Weekend at Bernie’s.

Demo: People’d talk. Besides, he doesn’t look dead, just drunk. Drunk out of his skull, sure, but still alive.

Scout: Eh, he looks more stoned. Actin’ stoned, too. Yo, Sniper, what’s two plus two?

Sniper: Water.

Scout: [snickering] Yeah, friggin’ high as a kite.

Engineer: Don’t mess with him, Scout, he’s been through enough.

Heavy: Heavy missed you, Sniper.

Sniper: [mumbling] A’course you missed me. I’m the best bloody shot this side of down under...

[END OF TRANSMISSION]

Does anyone have any nice pictures?

Guess who got a bunch of 15ai lines for this interaction… 👀 I just don’t know if I can animate it or not.

True love 💖

Seems the old true love post is gaining some traction again, oddly enough! I know I said I wouldn’t give context but…

Well, I remembered the finished products.

A project idea from me and friends that’s pretty under wraps right now since we’re not sure if we’ll go through with it or not (time, hyperfixations, etc.) but the general context for these in particular:

The Fault Fortress team is a team of self aware single player bots based on a glitch that a friend of mine caught on tape, within the video was a lot of incredible things to work off of; such as how spy and scout (the player) took opposite routes to investigate the same goal, blue base, yet the people inside were nowhere to be found.

I’m telling you all this because that’s the most rooted in fact thing we have about it, however the context behind the IMAGES:

BLU spy joins the gang as well as RED Engie, one before the other. When the team of self aware bots are running from vac between worlds, they find a place to shelter in— a cold, snowy and desolate area with a barely insulated wooden shack. But it’s unreachable by vac, so they rest there.

Of course, both are cold and the others already have their own setups.

And so, begrudgingly, they both end up going to the same corner bc they’re COLD and Engie is WARM

Anyways I think since Spy is taller than Engie he has trouble figuring out where to put his legs so he just ends up straddling him lol

Hey heads up

Y’know how I said I’d be messing with my theme and then didn’t do anything? Well I’m doing that now, expect eye burning colors and layouts changing and breaking things for the next little while. Sorry guys! I’ll try to be quick.