*makes A Big Step In Your Direction With The Bowl Full Of Whipped Cream*

LET US SEE YOUR HANDWRITING PLEASE

But you've already seen my handwriting when I briefly explained how affiliate marketing and networks work.

That's so random hahahaha 🤣😂😂🤣

What are some things that piss you off?

Wet socks, off brand chocolate, liars, snobby kids, thieves, copy cats, cold coffee, trends, whangdoodles, Edward's associates (Joyce), chewing gum, uncleanliness, mouth breathers, cigarettes and soggy bread.

Just to name a few, of course.

Can we see more wonka articles I love reading about your life!! :3

Of course you can! 😁 Here:

These are old, headlines for the opening of my factory to be precise! And if you can quite make out the Fortune magazine font it says, "The Most Successful Chocolatier in the World Opens the Gates of the Largest Chocolate Factory Ever Built".

~•••~

This is another article that goes along with the same date as the other. Grand opening of my factory, blah blah blah. Me cutting the ribbon. Fun stuff!

~•••~

And of course, this is an old one that I had posted once before in regards to a question about my awfully exaggerating 15-year disappearance:

~•••~

There are quite a few more good reads that I'm sure I could manage to dig up somewhere inside this factory. I'll post them sometime, eventually.

Hey that's my thing 😡😠

Your face is aesthetically pleasing.

Why thank you! I'm sure yours is just as aesthetically pleasing. Whatever that means. ☺️

OMFG 😂😂😂

You said you would read a book for us but the original asker never said what book they wanted you to read.. so can you like leave some voice clips on my ask, it can even be quotes?

I would post more to further entrain you but I'm afraid there is a one video limit. Maybe I'll read a book in the near future, someone requested If You Give A Mouse A Cookie, haha! We'll see.

You gotta teach me your petty ways so I can have sassy and mean clapbacks ready like you do, cuz from what i seen you win fights with ease 💀

Of course! It's all about sarcasm, delivery and wordplay. But this isn't something that everybody can do, see you gotta have the sass and be able to execute it perfectly. ☝️

You literally look just like willy wonka like wtf can you give me your Instagram @ please??? Duke Depp ain't got shi on you I feel stupid for asking for your personal things but ilysfm BYEEE😭😭😭😭

What?! I am Willy Wonka. Don't be silly.☝️

My Instagram allegedly isn't very appropriate, unfortunately. Too much chocolate footage with "sensual" music put over it gives people the wrong idea. Aheh...

But I'm sure if you're a good insta-browser you could easily find it.

Caramel Apple Cookies

Good night Willy

Round and round and round she goes, where she stops, nobody knows! Ha ha!

Welcome to the Chocolate Factory, the place where if she doesn't like chocolate then I don't want her. Ahaha! I kid, I kid. But seriously. Look at this baby stir.

While some of you are closing your tired little eyes to sleep, we're up whip-whipping it, boxing and shipping it! ✨