On Yearning

On Yearning
On Yearning
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On Yearning
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On Yearning

More Posts from Surmayah and Others

1 year ago

“the arts and sciences are completely separate fields that should be pitted against each other” the overlap of the arts and sciences make up our entire perceivable reality they r fucking on the couch


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7 months ago

Utopia's Just Around the Bend

Watching the city burn to the ground we pass a cigarette back and forth smiles on both our faces We swore we were going to figure it out We promised would bring in Utopia

And the cops are overwhelmed by the mass of people fed up with the power trip We won't go quiet and we won't be peaceful Not when the war turns into something real

They may have some kind of self-elected power but we aren't bothered because we got the numbers Riot bullets and beanbags out to the stomach The first wave will always go down

Sacrifice is needed for a job well done

Both of us smell like gasoline and sulfur They used to swear the revolution would be televised But there's no cameras in the ever-engulfing flames And there's battles fought under every streetlamp The people rise when Utopia's just around the bend

Don't give up so soon, that's where our problem lies It's a gathering people that turns into brick throwing riots I've had my eyes on that fucking Starbucks for months Using spraypaint as a weapon, and bandannas as a gas mask like bandits in black with a black flag a red flag, what's always ended up as a white flag

You can't fight for justice if you refuse to fight And you can't fight for justice if you refuse to help it exist

1 year ago
mom can you make my favorite ramen? can we go for a walk like we use to mom? can you hold my hand again when we do? mom can you make the pain go away like you did when i was little? mom i'm sorry i'm a bad daughter. can you put oil in my hair and we can watch a movie you like? mom can we try again? i promise i'll be good this time around.
[An overpass with cars driving on it, large buildings  an be seen in the distance]
relationships with your mother are so peculiar. you are everything i have, you dont know how to love me in a way that doesn't hurt. your voice soothes me and your tone scars me. we share the kitchen table while you dream about a version of myself i will never be and i read and weep about mothers hating their children.
I need you - I need you to look at me, Mom.

I need you to really look at me and see me.

Mom, I need you to see me.
[A painting of a person on the phone]

I'm sorry mom I'm still trying
My mother and I are so afraid of each other What if I become you, I shout What if you become more, She shrieks
and now that i think about it, i haven't been kind to my mother either.

truly, the art of jabbing knives is hereditary.
[a picture of a farm field, crops beginning to grow, there's a sunset behind the field]
And so, he goes back home. Home home, with his mother. He goes as if he might find an instruction manual there. It's an incurable feeling.
Your mother wouldn't approve of how my mother raised me

But I do, I finally do

Coming to terms with your mother's humanity

@death-born-aphrodite/@bitterl/Supernatural/8.46am on Instagram/Hailey Noecker/Fatima Aamer Bilal/Winterhats, literally from AO3/Mitski


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2 months ago

liking people who live in the same city as you is so weird like i passed the flyover that connects our homes you made fun of me for not knowing it and now i do and you probably live here somewhere and i want to click a picture and send it to you and be like look!!! it's the colorful cable bridge near your house!!!! but i can't. because we don't fucking talk anymore 😭

3 months ago

You are so young, all still lies ahead of you, and I should like to ask you, as best I can, dear Sir, to be patient towards all that is unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms, like books written in a foreign tongue. Do not now strive to uncover answers: they cannot be given you because you have not been able to live them. And what matters is to live everything. Live the questions for now.

—Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

4 months ago

just going to generally love more in 2025

2 months ago

I really don't understand how this is "hinduphobia", I have not demeaned anyone. I've grown up in a "brahmin" Hindu household. In addition, never did I once compare and came to the conclusion that one is worse than the other.

Yes, muslim rulers have destroyed temples, and this is a well-documented aspect of medieval Indian history though temple destruction was not unique to any one religion or dynasty; it was often a political tool used by rulers across faiths to assert dominance, punish rivals, or consolidate power.

Hindu rulers were no strangers to the art of destruction when it served their purposes. The Cholas, those celebrated patrons of grandeur, happily razed Chalukyan temples and Buddhist viharas in Sri Lanka when dominance was on the menu. King Harsha of Kashmir, ever the pragmatist, treated temples as personal banks, stripping them bare to fund his ambitions—because why let piety stand in the way of power? The Marathas, often painted as paragons of Hindu virtue, didn’t hesitate to target rival temples in Karnataka, proving that even the devout have a flair for hypocrisy. And the Vijayanagara Empire, while busy building architectural marvels, found time to demolish mosques during their wars with the Bahmani Sultanate.

Not another post whining about why “mUgHaLs WeRe nOt cOlOnizErs” like girl, they were literally foreign invaders who forced you to speak their language, broke your temples, tried eradicating your culture and collected zizya taxes motivated by religious bigotry in hopes of forcing your people to convert! At least have some shame and consideration for your ancestors.

2 months ago

it’s so true that the greatest weapon against nihilism and existential despair is to find joy in the mundane and never stop chasing after love

1 year ago
The Glass Essay, Anne Carson

The Glass Essay, Anne Carson

[ Text ID: Spring opens like a blade ]


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surmayah - i'll always seek to make it summer for you
i'll always seek to make it summer for you

she/her ▪︎ my mind; little organization

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