🐧 He Thinks I'm A Penguin????🤣💀

THE FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLDIER (2020—)

This helped me recently and you might need it as well :)

Shopping for laptops fucking sucks ‘cause I don’t know shit about computers. I’ve never had a computer with a functional webcam or microphone or the ability to play computer games made later than 2005 or a speaker that could play anything loud enough to hear from more than a foot away. How the hell should I know what I want?!

You need motivation to study? Let me introduce you to spiteful studying. When you study a subject to prove someone wrong. When you spend hours writing up notes so that you can get that grade and smile smugly at the teacher who predicted you a lower grade. Find someone to prove wrong, it can be a teacher, a parent, friend or just to prove society that you’re so much more capable then they say you are!

Trust me, it works.

Want to learn something new in 2022??

Absolute beginner adult ballet series (fabulous beginning teacher)

40 piano lessons for beginners (some of the best explanations for piano I’ve ever seen)

Excellent basic crochet video series

Basic knitting (probably the best how to knit video out there)

Pre-Free Figure Skate Levels A-D guides and practice activities (each video builds up with exercises to the actual moves!)

How to draw character faces video (very funny, surprisingly instructive?)

Another drawing character faces video

Literally my favorite art pose hack

Tutorial of how to make a whole ass Stardew Valley esque farming game in Gamemaker Studios 2??

Introduction to flying small aircrafts

French/Dutch/Fishtail braiding

Playing the guitar for beginners (well paced and excellent instructor)

Playing the violin for beginners (really good practical tips mixed in)

Color theory in digital art (not of the children’s hospital variety)

Retake classes you hated but now there’s zero stakes:

Calculus 1 (full semester class)

Learn basic statistics (free textbook)

Introduction to college physics (free textbook)

Introduction to accounting (free textbook)

Learn a language:

Ancient Greek

Latin

Spanish

German

Japanese (grammar guide) (for dummies)

French

Russian (pretty good cyrillic guide!)

It’s crazy and fucked up that being yourself is actually the solution.

I don't know if I already reblogged this but I'm doing it so that I won't misplace this

writing prompts for writers with no motivation

pick a topic you know nothing about and write about it like you’re the expert. just make stuff up. Tell us all about the complicated history of scissors or whatever and how left handed scissors were banned by the Catholic Church until 1978, or something

Create completely over-the-top self indulgent OC’s. Write about the magical half-unicorn witch with rainbow hair and sparkly purple eyes that you wanted to be when you were 14.

Write a negative review of a book that doesn’t exist. Just make stuff up off the top of your head to complain about.

Write smut, but like, intentionally bad smut. make it as unsexy/pretentious/purple/unrealistic as possible. Find the most convoluted metaphors for your characters’ genitalia that you can possibly conceive of.

pick two of any kind of work of fiction (movies, books, etc) and come up with an “X meets Y” style blurb for a hypothetical work of fiction that...in theory??...meets the two in the middle.

lists of names in a specific style, but they get progressively more ridiculous. examples: pirates, supervillains, Vikings, Fantasy(tm) taverns, puritans, settings on a Fantasy(tm) map, boybands, YA dystopian protagonists, warrior cats, any category you can find on a name generator website really

Make up some unhinged political opinion or conspiracy theory for a fantasy setting. spend a paragraph in the persona of some elf antivaxxer arguing that wizard staffs make you gay

make titles (and if you want, synopses) for books that don’t exist. you can base them on real books if you want

write fake sayings, inspirational quotes, fortune-cookie sayings. Make them sound almost like they mean something at first glance but they’re incomprehensible when you try to delve into them. Or make them just weird.

In a similar vein as the SCP Wiki’s Log of Anomalous Items, come up with magical or “anomalous” versions of everyday objects. You can start with stuff on your desk if you like. Water bottles that fill up with horseshoe crab blood if left unattended. or whatever. Include details on where they were found if you want.

write about questionable super heroes with weird or overly specific powers. Like the little known Blue Footed Booby Man

write a “horror” story or creepypasta but it’s like...as stupid and not-scary as possible. Dont just depend on “the twist/scary thing is super cliche and predictable” for it either, see how you can take an actually effective concept and make it unbearably dumb

invent swear words/insults, the more complex the better

plagiarize. By this I mean write something that’s completely made from sentences from other things and try to make it coherent

write one (1) scene from the most outrageously cool and epic hypothetical story you can imagine. just try to cram as many references to magical flying wolf bounty hunters and inter-dimensional dragon priests and time traveling samurai as you can with literally no regard for anything

Take a sentence or paragraph and replace every word you can in it with a synonym. either try to make it as weird and uncomfortable as possible, or just keep doing this in a telephone game sort of fashion until it’s no longer comprehensible.

goddd i just want spider-man's identity to be his own worst but new york city's best kept secret. like i want him unthinkingly taking off his mask and like 20 people see, but if you ask them if they did? no they didn't.

the rule is unwritten, but very enforced. like, there are online communities dedicated to erasing any trace of the spread of his identity. a tourist takes a photo of him and posts it online? it's gone in minutes, and people send DMs to the poster anywhere from "hey, i'm sure you were just excited, but...." to "ill kill u if i evr c you, fuckin bitch".

any information on spider-man is only spread via word of mouth, and only spoken in hushed, awed voices. after several years of spider-man, everyone knows someone who encountered him:

"he saved my cousin. caught a falling billboard from underneath with his bare hands..."

"wow... i've never seen him myself, but he talked to my coworker's daughter for an hour after he stopped a guy from getting a little too handsy. apparently, his smile is 'dreamy'."

these secrets are freely given if you're kind, trustworthy, and show respect for the little guy. but the moment you demand information on him... "i don't know what you're talking about, buddy. he's just an urban legend the news likes to blame the city's problems on so we don't unionize or worse"

so as many times as spider-man ends up with out a mask, or accidentally introduces himself with a name that starts with 'p' and rhymes with 'meter'... on the record, they don't know a thing. because he does his best to help as many people as he can, so it's only fair if they help him a little in return.

studying without the struggle to feel good enough. studying with interest and people to talk to when you don’t understand something. people who get lost in those topics with you over a drink or dinner in the evening, in a cozy bar after a day full of productive hours. walks and bycicle rides in the nights and in the early mornings because you spent the night in some shady apartment or club. motivation because you’re all in this together. happiness because it’s worth it. because you’re not alone.