Deer I Love Ur Mind Every Time I Read Your Stuff I Get All Giggly And Kickin My Feet And Spinning Around

imagine mistaking beastzai as your usual dazai (you thought he wanted to be emo for a day) and like did usual silly cute things with him then dazai came home and he’s like HUH WHO IS THIS GUY R U CHEATING ON ME :(( but in the end you have… double boyfriends but one’s moody and one’s fucking annoying

anons that think alike omg telepathy … use ur powers for good!!! two asks in one btw i feel so productive

alsooo beast!dazai would be giddy like a child to be in the main tl w his love… he’d be twirling you around and enjoying what could’ve been before he has to go back!!! all dazais are cringy and in love w u it's true they told me themselves !!!!

“What’s with the outfit?” You spoke bluntly, clearly a little put off by the reappearance of the black coat and red scarf. “Dude, you look like Mori.” Harsh, sure, but your boyfriend worked so hard to walk alongside you in the light, so the last thing you wanted was to see what would’ve been, if not for — 

Dazai smiled, seemingly amused. “Ah, love, it’s merely a costume. Thought you’d get a kick out of it,” he replies easily, pulling off the long red scarf: a staple of the Port Mafia’s boss.

His words help to relax you, letting out a small sigh as you push the coat off of his shoulders. “Let me grab you your coat, I know it’s around here somewhere…” You flittered about your shared apartment, pulling a backup brown coat from its spot buried underneath your closet. “This better suits you,” you speak under your breath as Dazai pulls it on. The fit seems a little… different. Is it somehow looser than normal? You frown.

“Thank you, love,” he repeated the same pet name. It felt as though he missed saying it, which doesn’t quite make sense.

You choose not to dwell on it — maybe seeing him in black again just rewired your brain for a moment. He’s alive and well in front of you and nothing else matters. A nod is all the reply Dazai gets before you slip on your shoes.

“I thought you might have headed to work early when I didn’t see you in bed this morning, but I guess that’s my fault for assuming the impossible,” you decide to tease.

Dazai easily slips behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his chin against your shoulder. “Mm… I love you, you know that? Let’s skip work today. We can spend time together, ‘kay?”

He’d always been unpredictable and spontaneous, so you merely laughed in response. “I don’t have work today, remember? But you still do.”

Shaking his head, he pouts — there’s the Dazai you love. “Nope!~ I refuse to go into work today. I’m spending my whole day with my love!” He practically jumps for joy, hands moving to gently hold your waist. “Let’s bake cookies.”

There isn’t much you can do, watching with an amused grin as Dazai unties your shoes before dragging you to the kitchen.

“It does not take two hours to make cookie dough…” you sigh, trying to jostle the white flour from your hair. “We baked cookies together, like, two weeks ago! How could we already have forgotten everything…”

Dazai grins, planting kiss after kiss on your cheeks, melted butter staining your skin from when he accidentally tried to drink from the cup you’d used to soften it. “Hard to remember much when I’m with you.”

“Is that supposed to be a compliment?” You chuckled, grabbing a towel from the counter to wipe both your face and his lips.

“Yep!~ It’s like.. my love is so pretty I can’t think when I’m around them! Oh, I could just die in… No! I don’t even want to die! I could live in your arms, grow old together and watch you get all frail and saggy,” Dazai speaks dreamily, swooning over the idea of growing old with you. How sweet.

You push him away gently and begin balling up the chocolate chip cookie dough, pressing it onto the silver pan you made Dazai buy when you first started staying over. “Saggy? No, I’ll be young and beautiful forever,” you joke, but Dazai only nods in response.

“It’s true! No one holds a candle to my love. Why, I wish I could spend every day just staring at you.” Dazai’s voice always sounded teasing when he was with you, but even as you put the last of the cookie dough onto the tray (only had enough to fill one, since Dazai kept spilling, throwing or eating the ingredients..) you could feel the genuineness in his words.

Oven preheated, you slid the sheet in to bake (making sure to start the timer) before turning to Dazai. Before you could get a word in, the front door to your shared apartment creaked open. Heart dropping to your stomach, you grabbed the closest thing to you: a whisk your boyfriend had licked clean. Said boyfriend only seemed to sigh, falling into a more somber mood, head hanging before he sent you a sad smile.

“I think the jig is up, love…”

Your name is called from the front door, the voice… suspiciously familiar. “Are you in there? You weren’t answering your phone and I got worried...” Dazai stepped into your apartment, hanging his keys by the door before turning around (an addition you made, since he tended to forget his and jumpscare you by picking the lock every few days).

The three of you stood still, no words spoken and the only sound being that of your metal whisk dropping to the floor. Spinning from one Dazai to the next, you wiped a splotch of flour from your shirt collar. You felt guilty for some reason, like you were at fault for not recognizing an imposter Dazai, and wanted to make yourself look more presentable.

“Awww, love!” The Dazai at the door pouts, throwing his coat on the floor as he quickly heads over to you. “Are you cheating on me?” He continues, slouching over you to impose as much of his weight as he can. You struggle for a moment, his bone crushing hug enveloping more than you expected.

Guilt still apparent as your tummy twisted, you shook your head. “I didn’t— “

The other Dazai, the one wearing a black tie and covered in various cookie ingredients pouted as well. “Maybe she’s cheating on me! I mean, I can’t believe my love moved in with another man…”

God, this was too confusing. You gently pushed Dazai A off of you, stepping back from the two. “I don’t— “

“I can’t believe this… I head to work early one time and now you’re making cookies for someone else!” Dazai A whined, face smooshed against the oven door’s glass in longing. “I’ll never be on time again! In fact, I think I’ll always have to be late.”

Dazai B pulled Dazai A back towards him by his collar, whispering obnoxiously, “I’ll share the cookies if you share the beautiful partner.”

Dazai A nods in approval, eyes closed and arms crossed like it was the easiest decision to make in the world. “I want half the sheet. And, I want a kiss…” He pouts towards you. Ugh, how annoying.

You deadpan towards the two, no longer feeling guilty. These two were just as much Dazai as they could get. Arms spread, you let Dazai A pull you into a hug so you can give him a proper welcome home kiss. “Both of you are obnoxious. Is that all I’m worth? Half a sheet of cookies?”

“Half a sheet of your cookies,” Dazai B grins. “That’s not something either of us would give up lightly.” The other Dazai nods in agreement.

Both of your stupid, annoying, clingy boyfriends tug on your sleeves, forcing you over to the couch so they can both receive your affections while the cookies bake.

the timer goes off after a while but they both whine about not wanting to let u get up. once you threaten letting the cookies burn they're quick to let go. i hate them both.

HAPPY NEW YEAR :3 I need to stop filling ur asks with random stuff but YAPPYNNEW YEAR 🐺🐺🐺

KEEP FILLING IT I GIGGLE 🐺🐺🐺🐺 hiii happy new year !!!!!!

Hii! I dont know if this has already been requested if so just feel free to ignore this, but could i request dazai with a reader whos really outgoing with friends and people she knows but when it comes to being serious or talking to new people shes super akward, anxious and stutters in a kind of wierd way and like if shes made fun of she doesnt know how to respond so she just says silent?

Sorry if theres any spelling mistakes or if this is confusing english is not my first language😭

Dazai with a socially anxious s/o | Bungo Stray Dogs | Dazai x reader

dazai locks tf in.

he's outgoing 24/7 so if you're ever in a position where you're meeting new people, he'll step up and make a complete fool of himself so you don't feel anxious

there is no need to fear a bad first impression when the guy next to you just fell to the floor screaming for no reason . 💀

or he'll put on the show!!! he can guide the conversation and metaphorically hold your hand through introductions (or physically if that helps you feel better!!!)

no need to be anxious because he'll create an environment so casual so regular so nontoxic comfy cozy you'll be behaving normally in no time and BAM new friend just made 🙂‍↕️

if you get made fun of btw????? he's "locking in" a new round of bullets—

sources say he no longer kills. Shame!

but fr he'll go up to bat for you. dazai is really good at making passive aggressive comments so it doesn't start an all out war if you're not into confrontation but will make the other person feel terrible about themselves!!!

or if you don't care he'll just chew them out right there and then. he'll just say their home address and social security number while looking them dead in the eyes

maybe you care Too much! who's to say! so you'd prefer a kinder option - that's fine, dazai loveesss expressing how much you mean to him anyway!!!!! if someone makes a rude remark about your looks, personality, what have you, he immediately starts talking about how, actually, you're perfect and he loves that about you and such

making fun of your stuttering? that's funny, because dazai actually has security cam footage of them stuttering when grabbing their mail from the main floor of their apartment complex—

he wants to be so evil and mean to those people and it fully depends on if you'd be comfortable letting him off his leash to do so lol

if you go silent dazai will make some excuse and get you out of the situation and take you home or to get food or whatever you want to get away from those people!!!!!!!!!!

dazai doesn't really care for serious conversations anyway, so no worries there :) he'll just be silly with you whenever you need

ALSO I WATCHED THE APOTHECARY DIARIES!?/&2&/?/ i stopped at a certain episode tho

HOLY SHIT HUGE i have like three drafts im cooking up phewww what ep did you stop on!!!! i can vouch that it is worth finishing

Nobody's hiring these days | Bungo Stray Dogs | Dazai x reader

"Honestly at this point I'd take a rejection. I'm begging for a rejection," you groan.

Dazai chuckles, hand moving up to push yours away, the phone that was covering his view of your face toppling to the side. "You wanna be rejected?"

You huff. Of course not. Glancing down, all your irritation melts away as you see your boyfriend's pretty face gazing up at you from your lap. He'd perched up here not long ago, having just gotten home from the agency and quickly raced over to sit beside you on the couch. Which, of course, quickly became lying on the couch and pleading with you to lie down alongside him.

"I just," you sigh, "it's weird to get no responses. I've started applying to part time work as well, places that are seeking help "desperately," and no one will email me back. Is my resume that shitty?" The last question comes out despondently, causing Dazai to frown. He never wants to see you sad.

"Your resume is perfect. It's all about you, after all," he grins.

Not responding to his lip service, your hand that had been holding your phone (and checking your email) just moments ago now runs through his hair. It's serene, being able to just enjoy a moment of peace and quiet with your boyfriend.

The two of you had such hectic jobs before you'd gotten fired from yours, meaning you usually spent time at home preparing for tomorrow. Being able to sit with him, fingers carding through his hair as he purrs like a cat... it's a dream come true.

Dazai's eyes flutter shut. Basking in the warmth of the setting sun's shine through the living room window onto him and your soothing fingers just oozes all the stress of today out of his system. This is all Dazai wanted for today - to spend time with his favorite person. Or maybe one of two, since Kunikida covered his lunch today.

The way things are now... Dazai would hate for them to change. "You could stop applying," he carefully speaks. It's sudden, breaking through the silence and serenity, but quiet and soft as well. "Just stay home. I can pamper you."

Stay home..? "No, that doesn't make sense. I should be out there in the world, making bread and grinding or whatever people say these days— "

"I can help with the grinding— "

"And when I head back out into the work force, they'll wonder why there's such a huge gap in my resume. I need to find work now." You don't even dignify Dazai's interruption with a response.

I mean, yeah, you're right - if you want to be technical with it... The job market is only getting harder to breach everyday and the longer you wait to get back out there, the harder it'll be. But Dazai didn't work his ass off to get you fired from one place just for you to crawl back to another.

"But what if you just didn't go back to work?" Dazai broaches. "Ever, I mean. I can take care of us, be the breadwinner. You used to be so stressed... it's nice seeing you make time for the things you've forgotten." 

Sitting up, Dazai maneuvers himself to face you on the couch, resting his knees into the cushions and placing his hands on top of them. "And I like coming home to see you, looking all cute and relaxed, smiling and waiting just for me. It was so sad when I'd come home to nothingness because you were working late."

The brunette is laying it on thick, for sure. But you've never expressed interest in being his cute stay-at-home partner, always emphasizing your want for "financial independence" or whatever. Dazai does look so cute, eyes wide and glistening, lips pouty. "Please consider it. I much prefer this for you," his calloused hands grasp at yours, sincerity in his expression.

Clicking your tongue in faux annoyance, you tug your hand from his. "Fine, for now. Just because no one has been responding to my applications."

Crumbling easily is one reaction to have. Dazai would rather you have remained steadfast, because he knows exactly what to say in response to skew this in his favor. Your quick agreement as you stood to vanish into the kitchen means that this is far from over. In a few days, you'll be back to sending out applications - and Dazai will have to be ready to continue blocking them.

Ugh, how tedious. But it's worth it to keep you at his side.

yeayy i love when ppl put stuff in my inbox :)) im working thru it! next week is finals week 4 me but after that i am LOCKING IN

Dazai is antsy. For those who've seen him regularly the past month, this isn't a new sight: him pulling at the edges of his bandages, shifting continuously in his seat, eyes flittering back and forth... It happens daily at this point.

Until you show up, when he jumps into your arms, drapes himself over your back, leans into your side, anything he can do to be as physically close to you as possible. His clinginess has started to affect your work, unable to do much as Dazai pulls you onto his lap during the day or sits on yours, head pushed into your shoulder. At least lunches are fine as he pulls you onto the Agency's couch and holds you from behind: you can still access your packed food (which Dazai always steals bites of).

Holding your hand isn't enough, either. Dazai needs to be on top of you or have you on top of him, or he's antsy — which leads us to now. He's shifting uncomfortably in the passenger seat of your car, the edges of his bandages unraveling as he picks at them. A small look of panic crosses his face as he finally notices, discretely trying to pull them more tightly in hopes of bringing them back to how they were before.

He glances over at you. Your eyes were focused on the road, one hand holding the steering wheel and the other resting on your lap. The hand was taunting Dazai, practically begging him to grab it... so he did. You glance at the intertwined hands briefly before smiling at him, focusing back on the road right after.

...

It wasn't helping. You're right there and he can't hold you? So close he can smell you but can't have you in his embrace?! This must be his own hell, fashioned by Satan himself to torture Dazai for all eternity (or for the next ten minutes before you reach your destination).

"You alright, Dazai?"

He huffs at your question; Of course not. The childish pout on his face makes you let out a breathy laugh. He turns to you with such adoration - what an adorable sound that he coaxed out of you... Ugh, it just makes him want to hold you more.

You squeeze his hand reassuringly, the feeling causing Dazai to relax momentarily... Until once again he's thinking about the warmth of your hand, and how much warmer it'd be to hold you.

"How much longer?" He whines, the same pout on his lips.

"GPS says seven minutes. Are you that excited for this case?" An amused smirk plays on your lips, the teasing tone making Dazai's heart flutter.

He shifts in his seat, the hand not holding yours fidgeting with the fabric of his vest. "Excited for it to be over," he replies, trying to keep his gaze out the window and not on you.

"Seven minutes, and then you can solve it."

Seven minutes. Seven long, excruciating minutes in hell before he can touch you again, hold you again. Seven minutes, 420 seconds, a few red lights and then a shoddy parking job. Seven minutes... seven...

You let out a yelp, eyes widening as you swerve slightly on the road. "Dazai!" You chastise, both hands moving to tightly grip the steering wheel.

His face is pressed up against your neck, hands grabbing you tightly as he leans over the car's center console to be closer. A stupid grin sits on his lips as he giggles, feeling heady from your warmth. Mmm, this is what he was missing...

"Dazai, I'm driving!" you say, as though the man would understand and move off of you. Instead, he lets out a low whine and hugs you tighter, entirely off of his seat and pressing up against you.

"I'm not stopping you." Your gaze shifts over towards him. "Eyes on the road." You huff, but do as he says. His eyes were closed, how could he see you looking at him?

"You can't do this, Dazai."

"It's like you said: it's only seven minutes," Dazai grinned smugly. Part of him wanted to ask why you didn't like him holding you so closely, but he knew you didn't mind. Should he be clinging to you while you're driving? Probably not, but then maybe you shouldn't be so warm and inviting.

You say nothing else, now focused entirely on the road with a tight grip on the steering wheel. Dazai says nothing either: after all, he got what he wanted.

A soft smile pulls at Dazai's lips as he watches you grab your phone. The bright light illuminating your face in the dark kitchen makes you look ethereal, yet he can't stop himself from making a joke. "You know I don't know how to do this."

"You know better than I," you say softly, an amused smirk pulling at your lips as you press play. Nocturne Op. 9, No. 2 begins to softly play from your shitty phone speakers as you place it on a counter, walking towards Dazai.

"I'd probably be better with the lights on," he tries joking again. You don't reply as you place your hands softly on the back of his neck, pulling yourself close as you begin to sway.

Back and forth, back and forth, you continue to step, and Dazai follows each move perfectly. It's no waltz by any means, but it is yours to share. A moment together, a moment of quiet vulnerability in the late hours of the night when everyone else is asleep is sometimes just what he needs - and you always know it.

The peaceful piano piece and the warmth of your body near his makes Dazai's eyes flutter closed, his head moving to rest on your shoulder as yours falls onto his. He hadn't realized just how tired he is, physically and emotionally. His throat begins to sting, and his eyes feel dryer than normal. He feels like crying. And yet, no tears slip past his eyes - they never do - as his hold on you tightens.

The music swells, hitting the part you'll always say is your favorite, and he feels you give him a gentle squeeze, a reassuring touch that causes him to loosen his hold. You aren't going anywhere, neither of you are.

A small this is my favorite part is whispered into his shoulder and Dazai wants to laugh. You're so predictable, and yet that predictability brings a sense of ease and comfort to him that he hasn't felt in a long time. He keeps quiet, his head moving further into your neck as he continues swaying with you.

I've never been one for classical music, I can barely see in the dark, you know I can't waltz, all excuses to stop himself from being vulnerable with you. But the second you pull him close, holding his face to your shoulder and rocking him like a baby on the wood-paneled floor of your shared apartment, he wonders why he fought it in the first place.

As the last note fades out, Dazai's face is fully buried into the crook of your neck, grasping onto your body loosely and tiredly. You aren't going anywhere, neither of you are. And the two of you continue to sway for minutes more, nothing outside of the occasional floorboard creek to interrupt as you embrace each other under the moonlight.

YANDERE DAZAI VAMPIRE DARLING CHEERING CHEERING . i'm just like dazai that's soo romantic

vamp!darling who just cries afterwards bc they're so against it morally while dazai just tries to explain that this is a good thing! it'll bring you two closer, it's bonding! but darling is just so heartbroken 

tries to feed on animals again to retain some semblance of control but it's all nasty now. did it always taste this... rotten? ends up undernourished and paler than usual, irritable.... and dazai loves it. he wants his darling to be happy of course, but seeing them soo upset just because they haven't had his blood? 🥰🥰 he's giggling blushing kicking his feetsies i just KNOW it.

finally darling comes to him, tail between their legs to ask for just a drop, really just a drop, and then they'll go back to the prepackaged stuff, the stray roadkill or a wandering deer, promise! and dazai, flattered as ever, agrees... and now there's no going back for poor vamp!darling :(((

okay sorry i LOVE your work it always gets my mind racing with ideas you're so . ❤️ gn

!!!!! no u r so <333!!+<!!!!33333

cw: blood, manipulation, yandere character

you have no idea that all of this was planned—quickly believing dazai when he claims that it was all a huge mistake! that he was planning on using his blood for donating (you don't even stop to question how stupid that excuse is) and he didn't mean to leave it lying around and now you're going to hate him and—

it takes you a while to placate him after which he has other thoughts on the matter. you've forgiven him, but was there really anything to forgive? he was certain that this was everything you were supposed to do, and that drinking from hin deepened your bond with him. why would you hate such an intimate act, and why would you think it to be wrong?

you don't listen, of course, stubborn as you always are, trying to keep yourself occupied with other things and strictly drinking from animals again. you even refuse to see him until you're certain that you're full, but nothing truly stops the mindnumbing craving you've acquired for dazai. and honestly, he's thrilled that you ache for him as much as he does, but it was starting to get a little painful, how you turned away from him.

he sees you suffer in your yearning, and he can't help but think that everything would be alright if you just let yourself do as you like, and as he wants.

and then you come crawling to him yourself.

he has to bite back his smile, forcing himself to look as sombre as you did in the moment. he listens quietly as you tell him how horrible you feel and how unfair this is on him (it takes everything in him to not explode in protests and reassure you that this is all he could want from you, but he has an act to uphold)

and when you admit that you can't stop the hunger for him, eyes glued to the floor in shame, dazai thinks he might grab you and kiss you senseless, if he could. but he stays silent and nods as though it made perfect sense to him (which, of course, it did.) and he pretends to think it over when you ask him if he'd mind letting you feed from him just once more. you look so relieved when he agrees, eyes brightened and a soft smile on your face, and it infuriates him that you'd always look so happy if you just stopped being so paranoid. but some progress was better than nothing, he thinks, tucking his face into the crook of your neck, and soon, he's sure he could convince you.

YOURE BACK !!! YAYY im literally at episode 10 of the apothecary diaries (yes im watching it almost a year later)

You’re making me consider reading the manga 😞

OMG YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE!!!!! first of all IM BACK!!!!! sometimes you just need to disappear for um. a few months! before locking tf back in 🐺 secondly YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE i loveee apothecary diaries it has nestled its way into my brain like a worm and the manga only gets better im so excited for s2

im glad to be back 😎 cleaned up my acct a little too teehee my masterlist is ever growing and hopefully a bit easier to traverse. LOCKED IN!!!!!!!