Writer, Close The Blinds On Me I Never Asked To Be Your Muse I Feel On Display, Naked Even You Undress

I am with you in the morning When you are waking, Still sound asleep beside you, Cats curled around us As the light of dawn is breaking. I am with you in the evening As you begin to drift off, Eyes heavy and sleepy. Stay in my arms, I will hold you So you may rest deeply.

But soar freely, my dear, I will never hold you back As you fly through your days, Over the earth and over waves. Whether the day is cloudy or blue Some days I'll fly beside you, One of us a hawk, the other a dove. Other days I will be the wind Simply the air beside you, Or below you, or above.

Follow your heart, wherever it Takes you, to each experience That transforms and shapes you, You can take my hand with you Or leave it be. When you are done wandering And long to be held Like the sea holds the shore, Bring your weary, tired bones Home to me once more.

Today is a gray day, endlessly cloudy One blanket across the sky The world is smaller now, with that barrier The haze shrouding the sun, the blue The earth is contained under the veil

Under the darkness of the clouds The sun does not beg for engagement We are pardoned of participation A nebula of clouds thrown over earth They say rest, you are allowed to

Ice covered ponds do not shimmer California poppies sleep in Beaches are spared their trodden sands Paint the sky gray and the world sighs Exhale, the day is small and so are we

My love for you is not Always declarations and Milestone celebrations Or flowery similes Of the moon and the stars And what lies beyond death

More often it is you Laughing across the room Because the cat farted And I am enduring it Because I want to cuddle Even though she smells

Pull me along On those strings you Claim belong to a Heart Carelessly you Dragged me down You tore my Spirit apart

If I were as cruel As you make me feel I would help you Break Sticks and stones Crushing your bones You made a Grave mistake

An ember in my hand Is a small and safe delight It burns of course Palm scarred for life Leave your imprint on me, fire

But place it in the earth And it will tear its way through Scorch the ground and then The trees until there's nothing Left but a smoldering oblivion

As a lover of fire As someone made of flames For this destruction I have only this tearful apology Lost in the blackest smoke

Quiet. There is only quiet. I speak without moving my lips, Without clearing my throat. This voice belongs only to my mind now. It is soft and tender. Words are harsh.

My voice does not criticize me anymore, I have tamed it from the feral creature It once was. Down now, down. My voice wears a collar Though I do not keep it on a leash.

Silent. I am a silent person now. Yes, I speak with lips moving, I converse when I have to.

Is this living? Being a worldly mute? Yes, my voice and I are surviving. Survival is all we can tolerate.

I am yours in hallways In empty bedrooms Behind the buildings at night I am yours in moonlight I am yours in dreams

I am yours when no one's looking But that is always Always you are on my mind Always I am craving you Your touch that is Both physical and Soul crushing

I cling to you at midnight I taste your mouth When the others sleep When we are truly alone When I am free to Call your name In all the ways I need to

I might beg you I might be on the floor To steal you away I might actually try I might actually keep you And I would not be sorry

Unleash your body on me I need all of you Your skin, your scent I need to feel you need me To feel you shiver On my body To sweat with me

I could never kiss anyone But you No lips have ever fit mine No breath has ever tasted so sweet I would never touch another's lips Just to have yours And you would never share me

He is a kitten Licking my wounds His scratchy Little tongue Warm and wet Against my skin

Maybe for some It is too difficult Too strenuous To even think of Life filled with Softness or beauty

When forests Are always burning And the plague Is ramping up And societies are Divided and violent

Maybe some Will wonder how Anyone can find Hope these days When our earth Is crumbling down

But he rubs his Face against mine Licks my hair And I will not let Any cruelty Touch his world

Driving through the hills A little after dinner time I speed in the right lane.

"Don't worry," I sound very reassuring, "I know where I'm going."

I need my glasses And I can't admit to him That actually I can't see And I"m a little lost.

He needs some reassurance Which I hand out like mints, Maybe if I sugar coat it He won't know it's a little harsh, A bit too fresh, with a bite.

It's too cold for rain, Too warm for snow So we don't know what's coming down.

But we are. I'm having a panic attack While laughing at his story.

I wan't to turn around, I've missed the exit. "Trust me," I say "It's okay."

So he does But he shouldn't.

There are cracks In the pavement Outside my window Where trees have Stretched out their Roots, like the Asphalt is simply A weighted blanket

When the garbage Trucks bounce and Thunk over those Bumps in the road I can almost hear The trees laughing