'Why Didn't You Come With Me?'

Joker || Fracture

Readers Please Note: Joker || Fracture may contain spoilers for the film. Read at your own discretion.

|| FOUR ||

Three months, two weeks and four days.

Arthur had been keeping a log of the passing time in the staff sign-in book where he was taught to autograph his name and the date for every morning as he clocked in and every evening before clocking out. The theatre director, the enigmatic and somewhat eccentric Lauretta Styl proved to be a regimented woman who ran her staff both cast and crew strictly, but fairly.  With the exception of the performance personnel, theatre crew were worked on a two week rotating roster over a nine hour day. Staff began at either 7AM, 9AM or 11AM and worked through to 4PM, 6PM or 8PM respectively. They were afforded an hour’s lunch break, unpaid and two coffee breaks spaced evenly throughout their shifts ensuring the floors were never kept unmanned and always evenly staffed.

Arthur’s first fortnight in the theatre saw him on the 9AM shift and he was mindful to take an early bus into town to avoid being late. The weekend leading up his first Monday on duty found him to be a veritable ball of kinetic excitement. He could hardly sit still his anticipation was so great.  That evening after the interview, found him bolting home on jubilant footfalls. A new sense of purpose filled him. Opportunity did wonders for a man’s self-confidence. Divesting himself of keys and coat, he called for his mother who was reading in the warm lamplight of the living room. She fixed her son with a cursory glance and nodded approvingly. He furnished her with every detail he could recall, bustling into the kitchen, intent on cooking a celebratory dinner. He’d make pasta sauce from scratch tonight!

“This is why I named you, Happy.” Penny murmured fondly as she sat upon a stool at their kitchen counter drinking sweet, hot tea and watching her son chop onions and sing to himself contentedly.

“Are they going to pay your better at this new job?”

“I dunno, Ma. It’s not right to ask about money during the interview. I’m sure it’ll be okay. We’ve always gotten by before even when things were tight. You should see this place, Ma, really. They have these beautiful purple curtains and gold fittings on the ceilings. They’re so high! You’d strain your neck looking up. And the stage is beautiful. The lady who runs the place, Lauretta, she said one day I might be able to perform on it, with my comedy act.”

“You’ll have to write some better jokes then. Something funny.” Penny replied absently. A shockingly loud clatter jolted her abruptly upright. Her son dropped the cooking knife he was handling to the sink.

“Jesus, Happy, do you have to be so clumsy? And loud? And did you check the letter box on your way up? I’m waiting for a letter.”

“They are funny.” Arthur murmured indistinctly beneath his breath. His voice quiet and his gaze unfocused upon the middle-distance. His elation deflating as suddenly as it had swelled. Penny’s ears were sharp though.

“What?”

“I said no, Ma. There wasn’t any letters today. There never is.”

“Oh… Well, I’m going to watch some television for a while, leave you to cook in peace.”

He waited for a few moments. Listening to the shuffling slippered foot-falls of his mother as she groaned, rising from her seat and padding away.

Through the kitchen window and across the street, Arthur’s sight fell upon his neighbor’s drab, old brick building. His kitchen window regrettably afforded a view of the neighbor’s living room on occasion when the curtains weren’t drawn.

The tenants were never of any interest to him directly. There was something impolite about looking into their living room. For his sake as much as theirs he sought to avert his gaze or draw the kitchen curtains whilst he cooked.

What drew his attention on this night was their great ginger tom cat with white paws and striking yellow eyes. The animal wore a red collar with a tiny silver bell around its neck and perched regally atop the window sill, watching him. Seemingly never moving. He’d lept upon the peeling sill at some point during the conversation with his mother and proceeded to lick at his left paw watching Arthur with feline interest all the while. He wondered at the cat’s name.

Come Monday morning, Arthur made sure he was at the stage door early. Martha answered his knock and offered him a polite compliment over his neat attire for which he was grateful. He’d spent the night before agonizing over the state of his wardrobe, ensuring his shirt was ironed and his shoes were polished. He wished he had a better bag rather than his worn brown leather satchel. It would do however. He made certain he had copies of his resume and ID in his wallet. Money was tight this week, he’d have to eat when he got home. Just as well, he couldn’t stomach anything right now. He was far too nervous. 

“Pleased to have you, dear. Follow me to the break room. There are lockers were you can put your belongings and the coffee and tea is complimentary. You can help yourself before your shift starts. We take turns bringing in fresh milk. I’ll mark your name on the roster pinned to the fridge door. Mind you don’t forget it when it’s your turn hmm?” Martha began briskly as she lead Arthur around the box office, up a stair well, into a corridor and out into a large and airy breakout room with unfurnished windows that looked down into the bustling city below. The stage manager checked her watch and continued.

“Now, be mindful of the time. Laura’s called a meeting downstairs in front of the stage at 9am sharp. Take care you’re not late. She’s very particular about punctuality and famous for keeping us honest about it. I expect she’ll be wanting to introduce you to your crew mates formally and assign you some duties, you follow?”

Arthur nodded his head yes. He’d been listening intently as he followed Martha and her rapid footsteps to a row of tidy grey and white lockers that were set against the wall on the opposite end of the room. To Arthur’s surprise, number 11 had been assigned to him, his name written neatly upon a white label in black marker pressed upon the locker door. 

“This one’s for you, Arthur. You’ll need to bring your own padlock but I’ll loan you this one for today.” Said Martha producing a small mail lock and its key from her jacket pocket. Arthur took the lock in hand, nodding his thanks. Martha continued her preamble intently,

“Now, if you bring your lunch, make sure you label it clearly when you put it in the fridge, food will mysteriously disappear otherwise. And where possible, don’t keep clothes or shoes in your locker over the weekend. Take them home to be aired and laundered save you copping unwanted flack.” 

“Sure. I mean, of course, Mrs?”

“Martha, is perfectly alright, dear. You’ll find most staff will tolerate a first name. But be mindful, some of the actors are sensitive whilst performing or rehearsing. It’s best to keep out of their way. And for heaven’s sake don’t let yourself be caught near the women’s dressing rooms unless you’re expressly asked or you’ll catch hell for it, clear?”

“Crystal clear, Martha. Thank you. For everything, really.” Replied Arthur quietly. His gratitude welling in his eyes. He offered a docile, slightly lop-sided smile.

“Well, see if you make it through the first fortnight before giving me any thanks. Stage front in fifteen dear, yes? Ciao for now.”

And just so, Martha bustled away on a brisk footfalls, adjusting a pen in her tightly rolled bun, leaving Arthur to his own devices in the empty break room. A number of round timber tables and chairs waited quietly giving the room the impression of an unoccupied café.

With little left to do, Arthur set about putting his satchel away in his new locker, helping himself to some instant coffee and lighting up another cigarette to pass the time. Once the clock above the door read five to nine, he was quick to leave the large breakroom behind, retracting his steps downstairs until he came to the open theatre doors where a congregation of some fifteen people were standing at the foot of the stage.

Martha was among them, speaking hurriedly with Lauretta who seemed to acknowledge what was being said and taking notes on a clip board.

Oh, she was splendid today. Dressed in fitted, black high-waisted slacks and a peach blouse. Her sleeves rolled back and her hair gathered in a French braid. Around her stood an array of staff dressed in various states of uniformed workwear. Arthur gathered his wits and strode in what he hoped was a confident fashion to Lauretta’s shoulder.

She turned fixing him with a dazzling smile.

“And here he is. Alright, everyone!” The theatre director clapped her hands sharply, the crowd quieted and listened.

“For months now you’ve told me this production has taken a toll on each of you. I thank you for patience. As it stands, I’d like to introduce you all to our latest crew member, progressive comedian and practiced harlequin, formally of Ha Ha’s Entertainment, Mr. Arthur Fleck.”

All at once a dozen smiling faces broke into hoots and hollers. A round of applause was had and Arthur offered a heartfelt smile. A little shy beneath the heat of so much fresh attention.

“Hey, welcome aboard buddy!” Called a particularly sharp dressed young man. African American, lanky of limb and distinctly possessing the style of a pop-star.

“You’re gonna love it here. Hey, you wanna see your future? Look at that guy over there. That’s Greg, he’s what we all gotta look forward to lookin’ like, even the ladies, yeaooow!”  

This seemed to draw laughs from the gathering, even from the unfortunate Greg who was weighty, balding and sucking on a partially lit Cuban cigar. He waved off the sly remark with good humor.

“Enough from you Freddie, you’ll give Arthur the wrong impression.” Lauretta corrected playfully before continuing.

“Now, Arthur will join us as a stage hand over the next two weeks, shadowing Freddie and Fay respectively. I ask you all mind your manners and be patient whilst he learns the ropes. Stagecraft takes time to come into, but if we can work collaboratively we’ll find opening week to our musical runs a great deal smoother.”

The next twenty minutes were spent exchanging handshakes whilst Lauretta introduced Arthur to each of the theatre staff individually. Freddie was finally introduced as the theatre manager, holder of all the keys. Whilst Fay, a sharp eyed, pretty brunette advised she was the stage assistant and understudy to Martha.

“Together, we’re your ‘A’ team, my man.  Get ready, because we’re gonna work you to the bone.” Freddie began, shaking Arthur’s hand with a dazzling smile. Arthur could not help but feel this young man reminded him strongly of the pop star, Prince. He moved with musical grace and had a habit of adding a “yeeoow” to the end of his sentences when making a humorous quip.

“Don’t let him scare you off, Arthur, can we call you Art, or Artie? And what size shirt do you wear? We’ll have to work out some uniform shirts for you now that you’re part of the crew.” Fay announced, gesturing for Freddie to give them some space. Arthur could not help but smile radiantly. His other employers and colleagues were never so welcoming.

“Artie is fine,” He replied finally, “and I wear a medium dress shirt, if that helps any.”

Fay made a note in her log book signaling a thumbs up as Lauretta once again clapped sharply and drew the attention of her team. For the next few minutes she took feedback about the state of the up-coming production, making notes and giving a great deal many directions. Arthur stood by, smiling and noting how pretty her small drop pearl earrings were and the way the rest of the team seemed content if not a little stressed. She addressed each problem and complaint individually and earnestly. The team seemed at their ease around her. In time the crew dispersed to their individual tasks in groups of twos and threes.

“Freddie, I’m going to borrow Arthur a minute. I’ll send him backstage with you shortly.”

“You got it boss lady!” Freddie exclaimed, turning smoothly and strutting away in time with a melody in his head.

The theatre crew finally out of ear-shot, Lauretta turned to Arthur with her characteristic warm smile.

“So, how are we holding up, so far? All good?”

“Oh, yeah! I haven’t done anything for you yet. I’ll work very hard though.” Arthur replied sincerely.

“It’s not about working hard so much as it is about working smart. Relying on your team mates to support you and more than anything, not taking anything personally. You’ll see staff lose their temper more than once and sometimes it may appear directed toward you. It shouldn’t be. But if it is, remember, you’re in your rights to just shake it off and move onto the next task. We’re something of a family here, Arthur. Working a forty hour week means you’ll spend more time with us than you will your own flesh and blood. It’s important that you’re at your ease, even when you’re not. No matter what state you’re in or how busy we all look, I am here to listen to you.”

This sentiment seemed to bring some profound change to Arthur’s features. His smile slipped and his eyes began to sting. He looked away a moment, fumbling for his cigarettes as he whispered,

“Thank you. Really.”

“Of course.” She replied, reaching out her hand to caress his arm gently. Arthur’s smile returned, he lit up, breathed in deeply and exhaled sharply.

“Now, Arthur, I hope you don’t think this too forward of me, but, about your condition. I was giving it some thought over the weekend and I wanted to get your impression. Would you prefer I have a quiet word with the staff just to alert them or would you rather speak to them of your own accord during the breaks and such? What would make you most comfortable?”

Arthur coughed sharply, his eyes widening in disbelief.

“Oh, please, I’m sorry, I hope you don’t think I’m being rude?” Lauretta continued, concerned she’d said something off-key.

“No, no, not at all. I just got on with my cards in the past. I prefer to not draw attention to it if that’s okay with you, ma’am?” Arthur responded quietly.

“Of course, by all means. I just thought, if everyone was on the same page from the get go, it would make it easier for you. If people know what to expect.” Arthur’s eyes seemed to harden as he nodded, taking another pull of his cigarette and blowing the smoke sharply out of the corner of his mouth. Lauretta couldn’t help but feel she’d somehow overstepped herself.

“We just want you to feel comfortable, that’s all. If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to find me. I’m almost always upstairs in the office. Have a great day ahead Arthur, I’ll see you at lunch.”

“Thank you, Lauretta. I appreciate it.” Arthur returned.

“Laura’s fine.”

“Laura then.” Answered Arthur with a smile.

The remainder of the day seemed to fly. Arthur diligently shadowed Freddie with a myriad of tasks. He was given a new pen, note book and clip board where he scribbled a range of instructions as he was toured around the theatre. After morning coffee break, Fay rushed to find him before he left the break room with a new walkie-talkie and a microphone head set in hand.

“Here you go honey, you’re on channel eighteen with stage hands. Push this button to call all crew and flick this switch to mute your mic. Try keep radio noise to a minimum during rehearsals. Actors lose their shit when they’re in the zone.” She punctuated the last word by gesturing inverted commas into the air, earning a laugh from Arthur who stifled himself by coughing. He wasn’t about to risk an attack in front of everyone in on his first day. He’d control this. He had to. Instead he thanked her and clipped the walkie-talkie to his belt whilst Fay rushed off taking an apple from the fruit bowl on the counter on her way out.

The evening came too soon. Arthur’s head was swimming with instructions. He’d managed to make notes of his latest directions and did a great deal of shifting, pushing and carrying of stage equipment on Freddie’s direction. The two men seemed to get on well and Freddie showed a sincere interest in asking a great deal many questions about Arthur’s personal interests that he took great pleasure in answering. Arthur was relieved come the end of the day. He’d found a friend in Freddie and Fay and looked forward to telling his mother all about it.

Come six o’clock, Lauretta found her way to the break room where she shook hands with the staff preparing to leave for the day, wishing them all the best and thanking them for their hard work. The same courtesy was applied to Arthur whom she lingered near a moment, whilst he made to take his satchel from his locker.

“Thank you, Arthur, for all your hard work today. I know there’s an awful lot to take in so quickly but your crew mates have nothing but praise for you. I’m thankful to have you in our team.”

“I’m grateful to be given the chance, honestly. It’s been a pleasure today. Are my papers okay?” Arthur replied with a questioning smile.

“Yes, they’re well in order. You can expect to pick up your first pay-cheque from my office next week. Now, go home and get some rest. Let’s see you back on deck bright and early tomorrow. Fay will have arranged some new crew shirts for you by the time you arrive.”

This was his chance. Arthur stepped forward,

“Laura, before I go, could you hold this for me?” He produced from his pocket an oversized match box and handed it to the director. She took it slowly with some trepidation.

“Arthur, this is not one of those prank boxes where if I open it I’ll be hit in the face with something, will I?”

“Haha! No, nothing like that, open it, go on.” Arthur urged, his eyes shining intently.

“Uh, okay.” Deft slender fingers gently pushed the large matchbox open to reveal within its depths a tiny pink rose bud.

“Oh how pretty!” She exclaimed lifting the flower gently and holding it to the light. Arthur furrowed his brows and clicked his tongue in exaggerated annoyance.

“Tsk, that’s not right at all. These boxes can be so unpredictable. Are you sure there’s nothing else in there?”

Perplexed, Lauretta opened out the match box fully affirming to Arthur that it was indeed empty

“May I?” He asked gently, taking the little rose bud from the lady’s fingers and shutting it back into the confines of the match box.

“Now, maybe if you blow on it, like a birthday candle?” Enchanted, Lauretta played along taking the box back into her waiting hands and blowing against it gently.

“Now try.” Arthur prompted. Nodding, the theatre director slid the match box open for a second time gasping with childlike surprise when within, where the tiny rose bud once lay was her light blue handkerchief folded into a neat little square.  With a gasp she lifted the cloth free of the matchbox looking up with stunned joy. The little rose bud was nowhere to be seen.

“Arthur! That’s remarkable! What a charming trick!” She gasped exuberantly.

“I’m glad you like it.” He breathed, deeply relieved and gently taking the box from her hand.

“Really Arthur, give yourself a little time to settle into your new role, then we’re going to have to talk about organizing some sort of show time on the side for you. How does that sound?”

“Oh! Wonderful, truly! Thank you!” Arthur exclaimed brightly.  

He left work that day and took the bus home in high spirits. He may have had little to offer, but his determination to succeed was great. He was tired now. Tired from a day’s solid physical and mental labor. He hoped to shower and maybe eat something. Perhaps it wouldn’t be so hard to sleep tonight. He began to plan his next visit to Pogo’s that weekend on the bus ride home. He still wasn’t able to get a seat. But it didn’t matter so much now. He’d have a lot to tell his mother when he got home.

He’d made Lauretta smile.

Fracture 1 | Fracture 2 | Fracture 3

Lalique ♥♥♥

P.R.I.D.E

The entire room seemed to sway slightly under the low light of the lamps and the soothing glitter of the crystal chandelier overhead. The sun had set on a beautiful Roman afternoon and Santino was just wiping the last of a line of purest Colombian cocaine into his gums with his middle finger, enjoying the nerve frazzling high that came shimmering off the drug in a slow burn as he worked down his third glass of Sicilian merlot. Around him, his crew, his family; were seated at their ease about the drawing room. Reclining back into plush leather and decadent well stuffed lounges decorated with silk cushions. The pale walls and their contemporary modern classic elegance paired with the soothing sounds of relaxing deep house chill that played through the surround sound system soothed away their tension as though they were all great cats reclining about after a dramatic hunt.

The large glass and timber coffee table with its turned legs played host to more than harmless homoerotic Grecian art books. Marcus had laid out a crystal bordered mirror as a platter and used a blindingly sharp razor to work pure white powder worth well into the quadruple digits into thread-fine lines of illicit pleasure. They were rarely afforded the opportunity to dabble in recreational narcotic use. But, given Santino's leave now that they were allowed to relax off duty for a week; and the fact that London had strained them to the bone, they sought to relax that rigidity somewhat. 

And it felt good to do it. 

Beside him, on the lounge Tony and Curtis had already taken down three lines each snorted directly up their noses using rolled hundred Euro bills as a conduit to deposit the drug into their systems. Much to the claps and cheers of the others, Hector, who would mix his with a little vodka and drink it down and Tino who rather enjoyed seeing his boys become that intimate. The two men had locked eyes as they inhaled. The moment sensuous between them. They both eased back and smiled wolfishly. That had felt good. Too good. Tony thumbed a stray few grains of powder from Curtis's upper lip and Curtis grabbed for Tony's wrist before he could flick the debris away, instead making his friend watch as he sucked his thumb into his mouth with a moan. The remnants of the cocaine dissipated against his tongue. The air tensed between them. Charging with the heat of unabashed sexual tension. Curtis made no move to pull his thumb out of Tony's mouth. 

Wired, tense and edging as they were: all it would take was one wrong move from any of them and the threat of eruption would drench them all in the heat of searing forbidden passion. They didn't cross the line with each other. They were family. They had duty. They had honour. They had a responsibility to uphold. 

Christov opened his fucking mouth.

"Hey, you pair... C'mon man, don't tease us. We wanna watch you clean each other's guns."

Clapping and cheers. The clink of glasses. Footsteps as Ares and Lalienna finally joined them. The men separated with suggestive looks and took to their drinks. Tony eased back into working on correcting the aim of his combat pistol. A task which he wasn't sure he would be able to exact with the ache between his legs or the high that was coming on in a building wave. 

Beside him Curtis complained. 

"Fuck.... You know that shit is pure when it gets you this hard."

"Um, that's not the blow, amico." Marcus corrected as he racked a new row of lines for Hector's drink. 

"Behave you fags, the ladies are present now!" Santino laughed, sighing deeply into Lalienna's neck and searing at the heat of her touch as she sat atop his lap and caressed him. The couple shared an intimate moment of gentle kisses and embraces. Meanwhile, Ares set a little silver box of illicit pills atop the coffee table next to Marcus who thanked her graciously and helped himself to its contents which she explained to the room in her customary agile hands. 

'Pills boys. Grade 'A' Ecstasy from Berlin.' 

Finally, finally, she had gotten Lali downstairs. Man, she looked beautiful but fucked up. Her heart was bleeding for her friend. The worst part of all this was how helpless she felt to prevent Lalienna's suffering. At twenty-four, Ares had not yet developed the maternal instincts that were apparently essential and second nature to other women. Her lifestyle was a selfish, and highly self-indulgent cascade of events that disallowed her from considering her future or motherhood too deeply. As such, she could not fully comprehend nor imagine the turmoil her friend was churning through. But she proceeded to look over the young woman with veiled glances and declined the lines of cocaine that Marcus offered her so as she could be sober enough to monitor the young woman's behaviour closely. If the slightest thing seemed amiss, she was ready to react against the boys with vicious ferocity and absolute selflessness. That was the extent of her loyalty, considering the romantic moments and positively explosive bouts of heated passion the girls had exchanged since Lalienna's initiation had been approved by Gianna in London.  She accepted a glass of wine from Hector however, but nursed it only to be polite. She kept her hands busy by selecting one of the pistols on the table and proceeded with its unpacking to clean the cylinders and other parts of the weapon as Tony worked beside her. 

Meanwhile across the way, Santino was equally concerned with his lover's body language. Her emotions read pain and dissociated depression across her eyes. Her caresses were clinging, which he didn't mind. But she seemed tense on his lap. Was it her cycle that was affecting her so poorly or the pills she'd been taking? He had no basis of comparison. Whilst Lalienna buried her face into his neck he signed to Ares with one hand,

'She eat?' Fast gesture. His fingers returned to caressing her hip. Ares shook her head no and read the frustration in Tino's eyes. His brows furrowed. He was clearly pissed off. 

"You okay baby?" He murmured against her hair. The girl declined to answer but proceeded to tell him she loved him repeatedly and with heart-breaking sincerity. 

"Ti amo anch'io piccola."  (I love you too baby.) He whispered back, over and over. Meeting her eyes and melting under the innocence of her expression. He'd never considered her child-like, but in this moment she certainly appeared so. So much so, that he was suddenly possessed by a deep-seeded pang of guilt for daring to sexually defile her as he had. 

The fear in him was short lived for Christov called her attention now that he had loaded his machine. Tino was reluctant to let his dancer go, fixing Christov with a clear glare that read: 'Be gentle, or else.' The men exchanged knowing glances as Lalienna shimmied out of her skin-tight jeans and settled into the plush French chaise lounge. Every pair of eyes made quick work of devouring her bare legs and the curve of her rump, though they were prudent and looked away immediately. She was family after all. You didn't look at your little sister like that. All but Santino, who devoured the swell of her rear in its black lace as she settled and exchanged cheeky words with Chris who chuckled to himself and began to work the girl's skin with the kiss of the needle. The men went back to chattering amongst themselves, drinking, playing cards and servicing their weapons. Their eyes were dark and hungry. Something about watching Lalienna being caressed by Christov's hands set their blood to pump hotly. They all jolted when she cried out against the sting with tearing eyes. Hector had jumped to his feet and only relaxed when he was certain her yelping was exclusively related to the pain of the needle and nothing more sinister. His eyes instinctively settled over her groin, knowing that she had likely bled profusely.

When she settled, he looked away and wondered if he should get up to fetch her a towel to cover her modesty. The chaise lounge she sat on was white. He silently prayed she would not accidentally stain the furniture. His primary concern was focused on hiding her bleeding from the other males whom he felt eyed her down like ravenous dogs. He found himself wishing he hasn't drank the vodka/cocaine mixture after all. His pupils had begun to dilate and he didn't trust his reaction times to be fast enough if he had to protect her from their predatory attacks. He doubted they would... But then again, a few years ago, the crew had wordlessly consented to attending an underground orgy in the back streets of Paris where they had fucked willing girls mindless, together in the same room. In some instances, on the same bed. That had been... an experience they'd never forget. And planned to repeat when time and situation permitted. It hadn't. He wasn't sure what brought that memory back. Oh. Yes he was. Christov... He was touching her... Caressing her calf, his fingers against her ankle... His heart was pounding in his throat. Was it the coke? Probably.

Tino had also tensed at her cries but settled into a lull as he watched her, listening to her breaths as she worked through the pain. Her breasts heaved and after a while she seemed able to negotiate her suffering as Chris corrected her movements. Sharper than he would have liked. He didn't approve of Chris' tone and clicked his tongue in frustration. The younger man briskly ignored his employer and settled into his work. The ankles were indeed a painful place to ink a woman, especially one with feet as pretty as hers. Even so, he consumed the art form with a ritualistic attention to detail that bordered on erotic. Every line was a kiss. Deep. Under her skin. His thoughts darkened. She jolted, cursing hotly then settled again. He shouldn't have done it.. But he rolled himself forward on his work stool and pressed his kiss to her knee. Separated his lips... nipped the flesh and sighed before straightening and returning to work. He didn't dare meet his employer's eyes. He could feel them burning into the side of his head. Santino watched the exchange.. Watched her feet, the way her toes curled against the white fabric. His body ached at the sight. His thighs separated just a little further, his fingers stroked over the fabric of his thigh. The drug had sunk its fangs. His perception was dilated... He felt hot.. Raging hot. Without realizing his fingers worked his shirt buttons free and before long his chest was exposed to the air.

"Hector, apri le porte del balcone. Ho bisogno di un po 'd'aria." (Open the balcony doors. I need a little air.) His guard complied wordlessly. The crisp Roman breeze felt invigorating as it lessened the heat in the vast room. It was Lalienna... she was making it so hot. He was convinced of it.

This tense, erotic atmosphere lasted between the eight of them for the better part of two hours. They laughed and talked happily and joked amongst themselves. They worked their weapons, reloaded their bodies with fresh lines of coke when they felt the climax dropping off only to flow again into another riveting high. They were all very drunk, very liberated. All except Ares, Christov and Hector, who religiously controlled themselves. Just in case. Just in case.

They had reason for their concern. The boys began to flirt heavily with each other. Swapping glasses.. swapping kisses that were so far from prudent it was borderline pornographic. Primarily Tony and Curtis whom seemed to have a hard time focusing on their game of Black Jack and got intensely interested in each other's mouths. All whilst watching Lalienna being tattooed.  

However, she didn't seem to respond the way Christov wanted her to. He called her attention, noting her detachment. He had hoped to lull her into the decadent pleasure that came from the sting of pain. Nothing. She wasn't present. And he knew why.

"Hey," He whispered to her, so only she could hear as he leaned over her leg... "You with me baby girl? C'mon sweetheart. I need you present."

Nothing. She was miles away. He let it go. Returned to his art. Her skin was his canvas. Pale flesh and black ink. He wondered if she'd ever come to him again, late at night. Now that Santino was back on deck.

When at last the young woman's skin art was complete, Christov eased back and admired the work with a flush of self-satisfied acknowledgment that bordered on depraved.

"It's beautiful baby... Suits you. Gonna look damn fine when you next get your heels on." He got up and stretched his back watching her as she strolled the distance proudly to her lover.

He realized he was jealous as Santino took her in his arms again.

"Glorioso bambino."(Glorious baby.)  Tino breathed against her ear. The Italian prince had hit a wall inside himself. His caress was hot against her hips. He pulled her down atop him on the lounge and moaned hotly as her weight settled against his thighs brushing hard against his aching manhood.

"Jesus... I need to fuck you..." He purred against her throat. His hands held her tightly. But he felt it.. She was stiff... suddenly unyielding. Conflicted? What? Was he offending her?

Ares knocked on the table sharply, drawing the attention of the entire room. All eyes on her hands.

'Let her go, Tino. She's not into you right now.'

Santino tensed... smirked... laughed it off. But he couldn't shake the feeling his guard was right. His caress lessened. Christov and Hector were watching him... Sharp eyes. He took his hands off the girl entirely.

"She's fine...You're fine, aren't you baby?" He asked quietly, watching her face.

"She was fine before you touched her, man. " Said Chris with a growl. He put down his glass, flexed his shoulders.

Bad move. Very bad move.

Santino dislodged the dancer unceremoniously from his lap, landing her against the lounge where she bounced and looked bewildered. He was on his feet and in Chris' face in seconds.

"Vuoi andare adesso, figlio di puttana? Stai cercando di dirmi cosa posso e cosa non posso fare con la mia donna?" (You wanna go right now motherfucker? You trying to tell me what I can and can't do with my woman?) He spat in venom. Chris retaliated,

"Faresti meglio a pensarci due volte su quel tono, bel ragazzo, o ti farò cadere un piolo." (You better think twice about that tone pretty boy or I'm gonna bring you down a peg.)

Now the entire crew were on their feet. Weapons, cards and drinks forgotten. Ares rushed to Lalienna's side, vaulting the table in one bound and planting herself protectively in front of the dancer. Cursing to herself. She had to get Lali out of here. If the boys were gonna fight, it was gonna be bad.

Christov and Tino stood toe to toe, both of the men shouting and swearing at each other in rapid Italian. Hector grabbed at Tino's arms, forcing the younger man away and trying to be the voice of reason.

"Come on man.... let it go! He doesn't mean it!"

"Fuck you! I do fuckin' mean it!" Chris shouted back, chesting up only to be ripped away by Curtis. The men struggled to pull the prince and his attack dog apart.

"No, Papi! Please! Don't fight like this!" Yelped Lalienna in shock. Why was this happening?! What went wrong, they were all fine a minute ago.

"Let them go, babe, Ares get her out of here." Tony shouted standing firm against the two brawling men at his back.

"You're drunk man! Drunk and fuckin' high! You can't take care of her like this!" Chris bellowed.

"I'm going to fuckin' bend you over and fuck you, fica!"  (cunt!) Tino shot back, pulling free of Hector's grip.

"You wouldn't know how to fuck a man like me!"

"I wouldn't know how?" "No!"

"Jesus, would you assholes just kiss and make up already, you're scaring the girls!" Marcus shouted, shoving Chris so roughly the man stumbled off balance. And broke down... into a fit of laughter.

"I wouldn't know how to fuck you, eh?" Tino spat, his own anger dissipating as quickly as it had come. A twinkle in his eyes... He flicked his hand and would have caught Christov square across the jaw with a resounding slap, except his reflexes were slowed under the kiss of cocaine. Chris caught his wrist and smacked it away only to knock the man back into his seat and come down on top of him hard. Their lips crashed in a carnal mixture of violent, heavy kisses. Teeth and tongues. Rough, aggressive. Neither man willing to back down from the other. Christov demanding control and Santino bucking him off.

The room erupted into laughter.

"Fottuti coglioni. Onestamente!" (Fucking dickheads. Honestly!) Hector laughed, rubbing at his face and tearing Christov off his employer. The younger tattooed man complained,

"Oh come on... I was about to get fucked."

"In your dreams, faggot." Tino laughed.

"What the hell is wrong with you idiots? I mean seriously, you guys are the reason why I drink!" Marcus barked. More laughter from the room as they all settled back down to their seats. Ares too relaxed, turning to hug the frightened dancer and kiss her cheek.

'It's okay. They're okay.' She signed, throwing up a peace sign.

"It's okay girls... settle down. Relax... They're just being idiots. They do this all the time when they're tense. They probably didn't jack off this morning or something stupid..." Curtis assured the ladies, waving them back over to their seats.

"Now we remember why we don't do coke that often. Because everyone wants to fuck everyone else up. You're both morons. Have a drink and shut up already." Tony drawled as she sought to refill his friend's wine glasses with a smirk.

"It's alright bella... relax... I love him...He's a good dog. Aren't you?" Tino smiled, wrapping his arm around Chris who returned the gesture and rested his head on his bosses' shoulder.

The storm had passed. They hugged and apologized and separated back to different parts of the room. Back to their conversations, their gambling, their laughter. Ares still protected Lali in her embrace until Tino strolled over and waved her away. "Let me have a minute with her."

'No! You're high!' She signed back sharply.

"It's okay, Ares, really... Baby girl..." His attention on his dancer, "It's okay. We're all fools. Behaving badly. Just big kids when we're not working. I love them... I'd never hurt them. Forgive me?" He licked at his lip, catching her eyes with his. Mischievous twinkle as he lowered his head. The picture of submissive innocence, until he asked with a smirk.

"So... Do we wanna go be alone now?"

Tears formed in her jade eyes, lip quivering slightly. She held back a sob, taking a breath.

“You…you never wanted me?” It felt as though her heart was breaking. Literally. The strings of her cardiac muscles were snapping, leaving her in the worst pain she’s ever felt… and she’s felt a lot of shit. She’s been through the worst, through hell. But this…this was worse. She couldn’t catch her breath. Her lungs wouldn’t produce the oxygen needed to stay alive. God, make it stop. Stop it! She couldn’t handle it. She clutched her heart, squeezing the fabric of her shirt in her fists. Her eyes broke. They relayed how she felt. So so so so ruined. So torn. So…worthless. Thrown away.

————

@f0rtis-fortuna-adiuvat // here is your angst. Do with it what you will. ;) have fun, my angel of sadness.

"All seven and we'll watch them fall..."

One Last Battle... Before The War

john wick | neon noir

My ten personal favorite artworks by JC Leyendecker. It is interesting that many of them happen to be Easter illustrations!

Dark Academia Ask Game: I was born in 1834 to a seamstress and barber in a back-alley dilapidated Victorian townhouse in Whitechapel, London. At 14, I committed my first murder, wherein I broke into my neighbor's yard and killed his prized Australian Lorikeets because the damned things sat outside my bedroom window early of a morning and chanted their irritating songs. it was not my first murder. I since regretted my poor fortune and have worked to make amends in a new secret society. Who am I?

finding eachother with bloody hands, whispering in dark alleys and running from people who aren’t really there. conversations increasing in volume and secrets stumbling out between meaningless words, considering if friendships are even worth the effort anymore. do i want to kill you or be you? should we run away or put in the work? societies either end in glory and redemption, or snapping eachothers throats to stop more birdsong from waking us up. 

Medusa Risen: Indiscretions 

“This was the noise that started it all. And it must have been good at the time, under the haze of black fingernails and red wine. Girls are Angels. When they fuck its glorious. When they love its to the moon and back. No reservation. No regrets. Just passion. And I get that, really I do. But it’s The White Women that are the problem here. They cast her out. Threw her to the Dogs. Athena disowned her for her indiscretions. Even if she didn’t know at the time that she’d been proposed in arranged marriage. The Director cast her out too. Because she’d allowed her son, her Jardani, her Baba Yaga to deflower her. To give over her first time because it was love. But was it really? When a man gives himself inside a woman, the cost is high. He’s bleeding himself dry. Loosing part of his soul to give in to her pleasures and needs. And a man will do it again and again and again, self destructive, completely possessed. It’s an addiction, sex. It’s dark, it’s dangerous. And you want it, crave it 24/7 once you’ve had your first taste of the fruit. No wonder they cast Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden. Wouldn’t you bite the apple too? Wouldn’t you also bleed a little for an indiscretion?”  ~ S. D’Antonio

“Santino...he’s going to kill me right?” Her voice was hoarse from screaming, raw with passion. Lalienna bit her lip, turning to her ex sister.

“Yes...and then me.” She swallowed the lump in her throat, hiding a smile. “God, he’s going to kill me. He’s jealous. Jealous jealous jealous. He hates when a man even so much as looks at me...” she laughed, shaking her head, falling back on the mattress.

“Hmmm...I suppose not telling him is out of the question?” Devina turned on her stomach, kicking her feet distractedly. Lalienna nodded.

“No, I could never lie to him. Plus, he’d be able to tell. He’s smart. And I’d smell like another. He’s picky about the perfume I wear.” She smiled, thinking of her lover. So far away...where was it he said he went to? Rome? Austria? She couldn’t recall. Somewhere far and annoyingly distant. She was so bored. And then she saw her sister from the tower...and they drank...and then she snapped out of her daze after cumming. To be fair, it wasn’t as good as when she was with her dark Italian, but it wasn’t bad. “What about your husband? Hmm?” Lalienna prodded, turning the attention to devina as she stood, finding a large shirt to slip over herself. She threw devina one as well, stretching.

“He doesn’t pay attention to me like that. He won’t notice.” She rolled her eyes, standing as well. “I’m hungry.”

“I’ll order room service. It-“ She was cut off by her phone ringing. She already knew who it was. He was the only one to use that cellphone. She swallowed. “Don’t make a sound.” She warned, grabbing it and answering it. “Papi!” She smiled, falling on the mattress.

“Hello, bella. How are you, amore mio?” His accent sounded throughout her ears bringing a heated sensation to her core once more. She sighed. It had been too long.

“Missing you.” She replies simply, playing with a necklace he had gotten her a while ago distractedly. “How is your business?” Her tone sounded more annoyed than she intended. He chuckled deeply, making her sigh.

“It’s good, my bella. I’ll be home shortly. We will have a nice romantic dinner.”

She groaned, rolling her eyes. “I don’t want food, papi. I want you.” Another chuckle. He was killing her.

“I know, darling. I miss you deeply...” he sounded distracted. She hoped he was as disturbed as she was. If not, he was about to be. She looked to where devina was. She had gone to the bathroom.

“I miss you deep inside of me.” She smirked as he gasped, shocked. It was her turn to laugh, biting her lip. “I just want to feel you. I want your touch. I want your moans as you thrust into me, calling me your good girl...” she paused. She was no longer a good girl. He was going to be pissed. So so angry. “Papi, please come home soon...” she finished her thought, whining.

“A few more days, bella. I’ll be home soon...fuck, you drive me insane. You have me all worked up now...” he growled. She smirked and laughed.

“I can help with that, papi. All you have to do is ask.” She enjoyed this. She was going to pay for it later...but she’d enjoy the hell out of it now. There was a pause on the other line. She waited patiently, humming softly, teasingly.

“Please, Lalienna. I need to see you. My angel...my goddess. Mistress.”

“Give me a few minutes, papi.” She hung up, throwing her shirt off and setting it to the side. With the right angles, she sent herself to her sugar daddy, waiting for his response.

A minute passed. And then another. Ten minutes. He hadn’t responded. She was getting nervous. Then he called. Angry.

“What the fuck is on your neck?” He snapped. No hello. She cursed herself, not realizing what she had done.

“I-papi...please-“

“Lalienna, answer me.” Was his strict reply. She sighed, shifting to sit.

“I missed you. So much, papi-“

“So that gives you the right to fuck some other man?” He snarled. She shrunk into herself, shaking her head.

“No no. It wasn’t...it wasn’t another man, Santino. I swear. I swear. It was my ex sister in arms from the tower... we- we ran into each other. We drank...fuck, I’m sorry papi. I’m so so so sorry.”

There’s was silence. Only the sound of his breathing could be heard. “Say something, Santino. Please...”

“We’ll talk about this when I get back.”

The phone disconnected. She let out a cry, eyes wide. The way he said talk implied there would be no talking involved... well, maybe her on her knees, begging. Begging for forgiveness. To her master. Her god. Her daddy. A beating. Maybe a bit of blood and that would satisfy him. He’d forgive her... then fuck her until she couldn’t walk, showing her who she belonged to...who could really make her cum and scream. She shivered at the thought, her flower throbbing. She’d be screaming his name. She’d be writhing under him.

And she’d take it. And she’d love every minute of it. Because she was a good girl.... his good girl.

————

@laserglassspider // 😇 @f0rtis-fortuna-adiuvat

What I heard on the radio…

Fracture | One | Two | Three | Four

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