Me: I’m A Very Private Person I Don’t Talk About My Personal Life

❤️

Draco: Now back to this bitch who turned down my hand in first year

Draco: POTTER WHAT'S GOOD?

That friend that doesn't get a single fandom reference:

Me: it's bigger on the inside.

Friend: what is?

Me: I'm a phangirl okay? Okay.

Friend: did you-

Me: I siriusly did.

Friend: but-

Me: it's the dam fandoms again.

Friend: *slams fist on table*

Me: THAT IS MAHOGANY.

Friend: I LOVE THAT PART!

Me: love is weakness.

Friend: wat?

Me: you will go to the paper towns and never come back.

Friend: I'm don-

Me: Josh Dunn?

Friend: wait who?

Me: don't speak out loud, it lowers the IQ of the entire street.

Friend: I don't under-

Me: yer a muggle

Friend:I hate Harry Potter..

Me:

Me:

Me:

*2 days later*

Police: so she just "accidentally" got strangled by a boa constructor cuz the glass "accidentally" disappeared?

Me: sounds legit.

I don’t dress up for boys.I dress up to stare at my reflection as I walk by store windows.

(via herecomesthestrangegirl)

ron: god, professor dumbledore's speeches are so boring. more like dumblesnore amirite?

dumbledore: I HEARD THAT, WEASLEY

dumbledore: TEN POINTS FROM SLYTHERIN

malfoy: hey now what the shit?

dumbledore: FUCK YOU MALFOY

This is 100% what everyone does in their room when they are alone, and this girl filmed it. Bravo.