Every Time I See A Bunch Of Posts From Neil Gaiman On My Feed I Think, "Neil... You're Procrastinating

you know what i want? i want some more of that time when jack drake benched tim after he found out tim was robin. specifically, i want jack drake having to deal with the fact that his son is robin.

oh he’s angry. his son goes around beating up criminals and breaking the law and he knows batman. but the thing is, batman and robin have been these distant, almost mythological figures for so long. gotham thinks of the duo as heroes, as not as people. and jack drake didn’t realize what exactly constitutes as being robin.

jack can’t hear his son anymore, not unless he wants to. granted, he had always been a quiet child. but now, his footsteps were completely silent. his breathing was almost nonexistent. his voice could carry across a room if he wanted, then shroud itself in fog, muffling it instantly. tim would just suddenly appear, at the kitchen counter, in the office, next to or behind jack. jack never saw him coming. and when jack reminded his son of these things, albeit a little shakily, tim blinked in surprise, as if he wasn’t even aware he was doing these things.

there are scars all over his body. objectively, jack knew that. batman and robin fought brutally, of course they would be injured. seeing the marks littered all over tim’s skin, however, is another matter. there are slashes and stabs. puckered skin that looks like a bullet hole. clean lines with little hashes, a nicely healed and well-taken-care-of injury. ugly, jagged streaks that scream pain, that jack felt nauseous seeing, let alone having the strength to bear it. tim acts like they’re normal, acts like assimilating all these scars were a mark of progress, a mark of strength. he rubs lotion on them a couple nights a week, falling into a routine. there’s a story behind each and every one of them, a life saved behind each and every one of them. jack doesn’t know whether to be somber or relieved at the fact that tim will never tell them to him.

tim’s reflexes are catlike, his instincts sharp, his mind always working a split-second faster than anyone else’s in the room. jack will accidentally drop something, and tim will catch it out of the air, easy as breathing, and hand it to him. as a test, jack dropped a ceramic mug filled with coffee on purpose. it landed in tim’s perfectly outstretched palm, not a drop of the drink spilled. tim was still on his phone with the other hand, but he looked away enough to raise an eyebrow at jack. jack didn’t question how tim knew he had done it on purpose. tim knows things, things that he has no reason to know, until he explained how he knew them. he had all of jack’s nervous tics memorized, apparently, and picked up things from other people uncannily accurately. dana poured acceptance and affection into the kid, and jack loved her for that, but he knew that tim scared her, just a little. jack was left wondering when his son had become the modern-day sherlock holmes.

and tim knew people. he’d casually reference batman or nightwing in a conversation, acting as if he knew them personally. which. well. apparently he did know them personally. but it wasn’t just the heroes from gotham, no. someone had once called tim while he, jack, and dana were cooking dinner together, sort of a bonding activity. tim had answered, then put the call on speaker, then continuing to chop a couple vegetables. (he looked far too comfortable with a knife in his hand. tim flipped it between his fingers and in the air with an ease and grace that made it impossible to tear his eyes from. and he wasn’t even trying.) then the sounds of an explosion came in, causing jack and dana to flinch, but tim didn’t even more. apparently, the flash was calling him, all the way from central city, where he was fighting killer robots, and asking for advice because apparently, someone named ‘bart’ had told the flash (the! actual! flash!) that tim had worked out a way to defeat them once before. tim advised them on how to get under armour platings and where the weak spots were while mashing potatoes with a fork. then tim said goodbye and good luck with a cheerful tone before hanging up. because apparently the flash calling him was something that didn’t faze him anymore. jack never said anything about the pictures hanging up in tim’s room, of a too-small kid in a robin suit, a boy in a leather jacket and an earring, someone more hair and goggles than boy, a girl with a confident smirk flexing her biceps, a girl with a bow and arrow, and a literal ghost. he also didn’t say anything about the photos of tim and that boy in the leather jacket, just to two of them. in those pictures, tim was laughing harder than jack had ever seen in his life.

tim was still his son, but he wasn’t entirely himself. jack couldn’t get rid of robin, no matter how hard he tried. tim moved like a predator when he was just walking down the stairs, a new grace in his movements. his eyes flicked to all possible exits any time he entered a room. he was no longer afraid to walk the streets of gotham at night, treading calm and sure even as jack and dana hurried quickly home with their shoulders bent. 

his son was important. his son was powerful. his son walked and talked and laughed amongst gods, and they showered him with respect. jack was beginning to think he was foolish for ever believing he could take robin away. 

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I just watched some chaotic moments from The Great British Bake Off and I desperately, desperately want a cooking competition AU where Bruce is just this little agent of adorable chaos

It still takes place during the pandemic, so the contestants must bake from their own kitchens. If course, formalities aside, this is national television and people still want to look their best.

Bruce? He shows up in his fancy little robe with a Nirvana shirt under, hair a bird's nest from taking a clinical nap, but somehow still fluffy, some smudged eyeliner still drying under his eyes. The very definition of a hot mess.

Alfred is clearly seen face-palming behind him and Bruce is very oblivious to it. He's just fighting for his life trying to smear frosting on his little cupcakes.

The cupcakes are literally melting in his hands and he's like " That's good enough, isn't it?"

" No, you fuckin' muppet--"

" Mr. Pennyworth, no swearing please"

" Oh I'm sorry. What's next, forbid me from breathing?"

Bruce is such a spoiled brat and everyone has such a good time watching him pout at Alfred to do the work for him. Sometimes the judges just fail him to watch him pout and throw a little tantrum

Of course, little Dick Grayson is there to help (read: Make things harder for Bruce) as much as he can.

Which includes napping on his dad's shoulder, occasionally waking up when Bruce needs a taste tester. Bruce makes the news all because his little sweetheart eating cake from his hand half asleep

Bruce and Alfred have a bigger challenge; Trying to hide Batman.

[Bat screeching from the cave]

Bruce, looking straight to the camera: Ignore that

mike (on his own):

the party (as a unit, but without mike):

the contrast always gets me. how did they expect to clear eddie's name if they didn't even stand up for him to the police that would have to decide he's innocent. they don't have to say they're helping him and risk getting him caught, but the whole town knows that dustin and lucas are his friends at this point. it makes complete sense for them to not believe he's behind the murders. mike would've made it crystal clear how idiotic they are for believing eddie's responsible

Everyone: The covenant is a founding part of society. Vampires and witches can never be together. It would make them too powerful and the humans would notice, it puts all of us at risk. Only a fool would try.

Diana, a thirsty historian witch (read: the fool), 2.5 seconds after realizing the hot vampire with the profile of a Greek god was probably present for at least one (1) fall of Carthage:

I need more Silly season 3 Steve Harrington with Eddie Muson because you know Eddie would love it but also be so confused. Like King Steve has a personal Handshake with Dustin?? King Steve giggles?? King Steve is sassy and wears strawberry lip gloss?? This is not the person he hears rumors about, King Steve didn't fling his arms around so much, king Steve knew how to flirt with girls. What is going on?? And why is this so attractive??

I also need more Mom Steve and Eddie Munson. Imagine Steve has to bring something to Dustin at school and Eddie is walking on the table when there a shout "Eddie Muson! Get down before you break your neck!" Steve just stands there with hands on his hips, The kids rolling their eyes like God Steve stop being such a mom. Eddie doesn't know what to do so just sits down with a quiet "Yes, Mommy." Pulling his hair in front of his face. Then Steve pats his shoulder, maybe even a little kiss on the forehead with a "Good boy." Says hi to the kids before leaving.

Eddie is screaming inside, the whole cafeteria is confused and Steve doesn't realize what he did until he's laying in bed later that night.

Turns out King Steve Harrington is kind of weird.

— jack veasey, “loving”

professors who have only interacted with other academics for years: “what do you MEAN you don’t know multi-variable calculus yet??”

professors with small kids: “thank you for not putting the lab equipment in your mouths when I turn my back”

Finnish menstrual product campaign to raise trans awareness.

Vuokkoset and Dakota Robin on Instagram.

Kummitäti: “Ei nyt oo oikein mitään tarjottavaa tän kahvin kanssa“

(Ruokapöydältä löytyy ruisleipää, vaaleaa leipää, karjalanpiirakoita, margariinia, kinkkua, juustoa, keksejä, pipareita, vohveleita, itse tehtyä mustikkapiirakkaa ja kääretorttua)

also imagine the kids looking through their family albums the first time and realizing how young their mom was when she was already married 😭 like they always knew this in theory but the older they get the more it sinks in