Y/n: So When You Finish Training In America They Give You A Trash Can Lid?

Sam: yell the first word that comes to mind

Y/n: DADDY!!

*bucky: looks at Y/n*

Y/n: i meant bucky

Peter: Tony

Tony: Yes Spidy

Peter: What's an alcoholic

Tony: Well you see those two birds up there, an alcholic would see four.

Peter: Tony there's only one bird up there.

Tony: Fuck!

Y/N: natty can i jump off the roof into the pool

Natasha: Y/N no

Y/N: why?

Nataha: because it's very dangerous

Y/N: BUT I WANNA

Natasha: ok brake your neck and drown i dont giva shit..

Tony: You have both tried your best. And failed miserable. The lesson is never try.

Steve:

Bucky: i didnt fail to kill your parents

Tony:

Tony: SON OF A BITCH

Steve: okay.. *leaves*

Peter: Mr. Pool what sexuality are you?

Deadpool: Sexual.

Peter: what???

Deadpool: Sexual.

Here's a quote I saw today

"I want AI to do my laundry and dishes so I can do art and writing, not for AI to do my art and writing so I can do my laundry and dishes"

- Joanna Maciejewska

Nat:Y/n, peter. What is the the meaning of this ridiculous high pitch scream? I see no blood.

Karen: your stupid reckless little ones just hit my angel hunter in the face with a snowball

Hunter: *wines*

Nat: and your name is?

Karen: Karen

Nat: ah Y/n peter you have exactly one opportunity to tell me what happened to hunter

Y/n: simple peter and i had constructed bunckers on either side of field

Peter: and we blow air horn as to warn other children this was now hotspot and epic snowbattle was about to commence

Y/n: in heat of snow ball battle with peter and i hunter snuck passed our barriers and simply og hit by crossfire

Nat: simple explanation your child is incompetent

Karen: you little monsters. So your just rising future criminals

Nat: i think only crime here is naming your son hunter. Should be pylon or sitting duck

Karen: you know what

Nat: waht you going to do karen teres no managers out her

Ok but can we look at how support the mum is and how happy he is to find out he's a dad???

why is the metal community so pressed abt this it’s literally hilarious. 10/10. love it. i want it.

Wanda: im so existed for this mission

Sam: yeah lets get this show on the road you coming nataha?

Nat: alright im coming. Alright bye y/n

Y/n: goobye nat

Nat: and steve the only reason i want to hear from you is if somene is dying or dead

Steve: ok

Nat: alrigh have fun guys

Steve: alright want do you want to do first

Bucky: can we practise our self defence

Y/n: yes i think it would be very educational

Steve: for sure i could show you some moves. You guys wanna do that too?

Peter: okay

Clint: we always like a good fight

Tony: im putting five bucks on the Russians

Steve: ok you and me y/n im going to put my arm aroumd you like this ok?

Y/n: bucky now!

Steve: wait what?!

Bucky: peter get his feet!

Peter: ok!

*steve: passed out*

Y/n: whoops

Peter: is he breathing

Bucky: yes he's breathing

Y/n: i got his phone

Nat: *phone rings* steve someone better be or-

Y/n: steve is unconscious

Nat: wait what??