“The Past Doesn’t Need You Anymore. Your Future Does.”

I really wanted this Halloween to be a good one. But it wasn't lol, I just had to ride it out I guess. Me and my kyodai were going through the notion that life doesn't always revolve around oneself. We have been talking bout this because a lot of r family members think that it 100% does revolve around them.

And so the notion had been stuck in my head for a couple of days. But on Halloween, it really hit me hard , that life does not always revolve around me. But it felt worst than that, like the world also hated me lmao, I felt so helpless, I didn't know what to do. Just think of the Linkin park song, I got so far and it doesn't even matter lmao.

I'm not trying to say I needed this night to be about me, cause I know the world isn't circling me. I just felt attacked even thought I was trying to make this person feel better. and I know it wasn't their fault, they just wanted to have a fun night.

At the end of the day I wished I had stayed home lmao. But you know bad days happen lol, it's not the end of the world.

December manga haul. I'm super excited for the mxtx books, I want to start with svsss first but I'm currently reading demon slayer so might finish that first. I got the d.gray-man noche for Christmas and I love it, Hoshino's art is absolutely amazing. I stumbled on to madk at my local barnes and nobles, they only had the second book. Madk has ruined me I feel lol, it's a great read but it's definitely fucked with my head

“Be weird. Be random. Be who you are. Because you never know who would love the person you hide.”

— C.S. Lewis

This is when we went to see Sonic 3. it was so fun, even tho I was sick at the time and in pain, the movie was just too good, made me forget my pain temporarily lol. After we saw it we could only think about when we were gonna see it again lol. We went to the arcade afterward and took family pics lmao.

🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷

Oh boy so many setbacks this month.

It honestly started off so good. And now its ended in a confusing way. I’m trying to handle each month as slow as I can. February feels like 2 years ago lol. 

I watched Nezha 2, 3 times lmao. I almost saw it a 4th time, but I had to restraint myself plus I’m short on money for the month. it's probably gonna be one of my favorite memories of the year. I love that movie so much. I don’t even consider myself to be a big 3d animation fan. Some of my faves are Megamind, httyd, happy feet and maybe tangled shrugs. But I never saw any of them in theaters tho.

Nezha 2 is almost 3 hours long not including travel to get to the theater(it’s not in the best area either). So I must really love the hell out of this movie to waste 3-4 hours to see it(I do I really do). It’s such a great movie, I think about it almost everyday. There’s so much I can say about it about it but I will end up writing a book on why it's great lmao. I’m so jealous of all the merch it gets out of the U.S. our country is full of so much hate. I can’t wait for the dvds, and the art books 😫. I wish it could stay in theaters forever lol, so I can see it whenever. 💖

Other stuff that happen, I cleaned my bedroom, I made it as functional as I can, hopefully for the rest of the year. It still needs a lot of work but I think I used up too much energy on it and was feeling like a dried jerky for a week just floating in the air, head empty no thoughts ugh.

The weather has been really nice out, I was out a lot this month, I wasn’t doing anything fun tho, but I had some cute outfit combos that I didn’t get a chance to take pics of, sigh I always forget. 

Some of the cherry trees are in bloom, I think it just the dark pink ones tho, still I love walking around outside just to see them.

This month I really was drawing a lot. The question of what do I want to draw just flashes in my head all the time. What do I want to draw, what do I want my art to look like? Idk, I just want to draw lol. I think that in the early 2010s I use to draw for myself, whereas now I am self conscious about what others might think.

sobs I’m just rambling now. I wanted to post more this month but it’s been a long ride. Hopefully April is less bumpy. 

(All images found on Pinterest)♡