He Cheng Is A Frequent Guest At The Police Station, Huh.

So this might be kind of random but I was just thinking about the duality of Guanshan's character and about the differences between how he usually presents himself and how he really is on the inside. I'm not sure if I'm the only one who perceives it that way or not but well, you know how most of the time we see Guanshan as this smoll, angry beast and ball of fluff, who doesn't allow anyone to get too close to him. I'm fairly convinced that this is just a mask or a persona he was forced to create just so he could survive the constant bullying and protect himself from those who're trying to break him and bring him down. For some people who tend to isolate themselves, one of the reasons leading to that kind of behaviour is the fact that at some point they begin to wallow in self-hatered, because they feel like they don't belong in any social group and everyone else around hates them anyway. And that's exactly how people made him feel - like there's no point in trying because he will never be worthy of anyone's attention nor will he become the object of admiration.

(Also I'm listening to "Adam's Song" by Blink-182 while I'm typing this and I'm starting to get emotional, send help)

He knows that if he'll be any other way, he's only going to get hurt more, convinced that no one will ever care to help nor take pity on someone like him. Not that he even wants them to but the thing is, that it's not always easy having the whole world turned against you, looking down as if you had nothing going for yourself. All he ever wanted was some peace - not kindness, not charity - just people minding their business and leaving him to his own. And maybe the bare minimum of fucking human decency. Too bad they weren't willing to give it to him.

And that brings us to the other side of his personality that is currently buried 6 feet underground, hidden completely from the world, stuffed far back on the shelves. I believe that beneath that rough, angry and aggressive persona he puts on, Guanshan is a very gentle and calm soul. He never wanted to be this punkish kid who had to prove he isn't a weak and pathetic crybaby each step of the way. And if people wanted to see a son of a criminal and a freak in him, he'd rather be that way to keep people at the distance. It's better to be feared instead of staying an easy target. Even if it's at the cost of losing touch with your inner self.

If none of the bullshit and bullying happened to him, he would be a genuinely kind and helpful kid who isn't afraid of taking the intiative. Maybe if people didn't put him in a certain box from a young age he wouldn't lose the will and the courage to aim higher and believe in things he could be capable of achieving. Maybe he wouldn't have given up on dreaming. Of course, he still would be a very introverted and private person, enjoying his own company the most, but he wouldn't be haunted by this constant sense of dread, telling him that if he doesn't put up the walls to protect himself, someone's going to hurt him one way or another. For example, if we think about Guanshan as a kid, he was an absolutely sweet and gentle child. He wasn't angry nor was he spiteful. On the contrary - he seemed to be much more mature than other kids and tried to solve issues with them peacefully. He was brave enough to stand up to She Li when others took part in bullying, playing into the fantasy of some kindergarden childlish mafia. Guanshan - even though he gets easily impressed by "cool" and "manly" stuff - can as easily differ right from wrong and what kind of behaviour is truly respect-worthy. The way he approached the situation with She Li and Buzzcut was done in the most mature way possible for an elementary/middle school kid, without him trying to prove that he was the cooler, the stronger or the wittier one. He also didn't care that he might end up getting hurt, considering She Li's not so stable behaviour. To him, the safety of his friend and the urge to speak up his mind was more important. Unfortunately, too many times he's been proven that speaking up his mind didn't do him any good. It always ended up with people beating him up or belittling him, whether those were the kids, the teachers or other irresponsible adults.

That's why I believe that all this anger and frustration is an armor he was forced to wear because no one ever tried to see past the flaws that weren't even his own. Flaws that were nothing but a projection of pejudiced adults. Even though he grew up with a loving mother, that kind of an unconditional love - although beautiful - can be easily overlooked and discounted when everyone else seems to think you're unlovable and unworthy of such love. And that kind of treatment makes it even harder to learn and understand the importance of loving yourself.

Now, what impresses me the most is the fact that we can finally see that Mo is slowly beginning to act like his younger self around He Tian. He's calm, he doesn't get angry as much as before, because he doesn't feel the need to protect himself around He Tian anymore. He's feeling safe enough to let that armor/persona/mask or whatever you call it lower down and reveal parts of him that he's been keeping hidden from others for so long. He still feels uncertain, not sure how to navigate this strange and unexpected direction they've taken but he wants to do better regardless - both for He Tian and for himself - which to me, ironically - is to learn how to accept and love your inner, vulnerable self. The one that others made you feel like you should be ashamed of and pretend it doesn't exist. All it took was He Tian lightning up a spark within him and making him feel like there was something going for him after all. Like he might be worth the time and the attention and suddenly Guanshan wants to prove to He Tian that he is. He's willing to change for the better, not only because he's seen He Tian trying as well but he's began to realise that he cares for the other boy and he isn't willing to just let go of him. He came to realise that he doesn't want their ways to part one day just because he lacked the courage to change. To be removed from He Tian's orbit because he wasn't good enough. Because he's chosen to play the part others told him to. Through the care, warmth, patience and understanding He Tian has offered to him, the spark that was once lit in Guanshan's heart was slowly begining to grow, forming into a beautiful and passionate flame. Similar to the one Guanshan has lit a long time ago in He Tian's own, hollow heart.

I like the idea of Guanshans's attitude shifting bit by bit, depending on how he feels around certain people because I get so excited just thinking about him and Tian discovering new sides of each other - sides they weren't expecting at all. When Guanshan finally trusts He Tian entirely, the other would begin to notice that most of the time Guanshan's a very chill, sweet and gentle soul, even if he can't express his feelings and affection very well. He prefers to avoid unessesary conflicts and tries to talk things through, instead of attacking the other or sulking over his bruised ego. Sometimes Guanshan would feel guilty after his arguments with He Tian, no matter who's at fault and would be a lot more affected by them than he'd let it show. He would hate being cross with the person he cares about the most and his affection for the other would often end up being bigger than his ego. He Tian would also be in awe at how adorable Guanshan could become at times when there was no one else around to judge him. Maybe there would even be a whole new playful side to Guanshan, where he allows himself to let loose and joke around a little, like that one time when he smirked at He Tian who confessed he's afraid of the dark and He Tian was like "STFU or I'm gonna punch your teeth out".

Anyway, that's something I've been noticing for some time already and I just wanted to put it out there because I find it absolutely beautiful to see how Guanshan is finally starting to feel comfortable and safe enough to let those more vulnerable parts of him show. He's slowly realising that there are people who wants him for who he truly is and won't judge him based on his family name, baseless rumors or old wounds without giving him a proper chance to prove himself first ❤

i was rereading 19 days for the hundredth time and noticed something...

we saw redhead's smile.

the evil one but anyway!

i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss soon pls i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss  i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss i want tianshan to kiss

he tian: do you have two tongues in your mouth? mo guan shan: no. he tian: do you want to?

mama mo: what are you guys doing?

he tian: um... it's our bro thing, you know. totally platonic best bros do it all the time now.

mama mo: ...

mama mo: it's okay, boys. guan shan, i'm sorry you felt like you couldn't tell me that you have a boyfriend. you can go back to kissing now, i'll leave.

the little kitty fang😭 guan shan is literally a poor little meow meow

Tian: Alright, high five.

Mo: [give Tian a high five]

Tian: [intertwines their fingers together]

Mo: Wha-

Tian: I love you.

*doorbell rings*

he tian: oh no oh shit fuck fuck fuck, i forgot to defrost the chicken! okay google, how to defrost the chicken in 5 seconds? oh my god, i'm in deep shit! what should i do? oh no, guan shan will kill me!

imagine what would happen to he tian if she li had actually killed guan shan then...

Writing fight scenes

masterlist. main navigation.

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1. Pacing

A fight scene should be fast-paced and intense. Unless it's a final battle with numerous parties, a fight scene that's too long tends to take away suspense. To speed up your pacing, use active voice to describe movement and don't overdescribe your characters' thoughts. Excessive inner monologue will be unrealistic, as people usually have no room to think during intense combats.

2. Character mannerisms

Here's a point that people often overlook, but is actually super important. Through fight scenes, you should be able to reveal your characters' contrasting mannerisms and personality. A cunning character would play dirty - fighting less and making use of their opponent's weakness more. A violent character would aim to kill. A softer one would only target to disarm their enemies, using weakened attacks. A short-minded character would only rely on force and attack without thinking. This will help readers understand your characters more and decide who to root for.

3. Making use of surroundings

Not only the characters, you also need to consider the setting of your fight scene and use it to your advantage. Is it suitable for fighting, or are there dangerous slopes that make it risky? Are there scattered items that can help your characters fight (e.g. nails, shards of glass, ropes, wooden boards, or cutlery)? Is it a public place where people can easily spot the fight and call the authorities, or is it a private spot where they can fight to the death?

4. Description

The main things that you need to describe in a fight scene are :

• Characters involved in the fight

• How they initiate and dodge attacks

• Fighting styles and any weapons used

• The injuries caused

Be careful to not drag out the description for too long, because it slows down the pace.

5. Raise the stakes

By raising the stakes of the fight, your readers will be more invested in it. Just when they think it's over, introduce another worse conflict that will keep the scene going. Think of your characters' goals and motivations as well. Maybe if the MC didn't win, the world would end! Or maybe, one person in the fight is going all-out, while the other is going easy because they used to be close :"D

6. Injuries

Fights are bound to be dirty and resulting in injuries, so don't let your character walk away unscathed - show the effect of their injuries. For example, someone who had been punched in the jaw has a good chance of passing out, and someone who had been stabbed won't just remove the knife and walk away without any problem. To portray realistic injuries, research well.

7. Drive the plot forward

You don't write fight scenes only to make your characters look cool - every fight needs to have a purpose and drive the plot forward. Maybe they have to fight to improve their fighting skills or escape from somewhere alive. Maybe they need to defeat the enemy in order to obtain an object or retrieve someone who had been kidnapped. The point is, every single fight scene should bring the characters one step closer (or further :D) to the climax.

8. Words to use

• Hand to hand combat :

Crush, smash, lunge, beat, punch, leap, slap, scratch, batter, pummel, whack, slam, dodge, clobber, box, shove, bruise, knock, flick, push, choke, charge, impact

• With weapon :

Swing, slice, brandish, stab, shoot, whip, parry, cut, bump, poke, drive, shock, strap, pelt, plunge, impale, lash, bleed, sting, penetrate