One-sided Homelander X Alien Reader

All or Nothing (2006) Background Cheerleaders

The boys giving a little show to the camera. Jeff doing a little dance. Much to see. Kind of looks like the beginning of an old porn tape.

I am in absolute shock that I found the dojo video. Here is the famous tit grab clip we’ve all been searching for

Just saying

Get a guy that can do both.

(He plays Kung Lao in Mortal Kombat Conquest. I couldn't find any nice gifs)

Find yourself a dazzling boyfriend who can do supportive sparkling boyfriend things while you be a girly girl and can also throw hands when the time calls for it.

Twlight Headcanons + Fancasts

After years of only seeing the movies I'm finally reading the book. First one only. The reason why I'm not acknowledging the other books is because I heard Stephanie Meyer purposefully made Jacob unlikable so that the readers would vouch for Edward more.

Bailey Bass as Bella Swan

She's mix raised: I started reading Bella as black because of how much of myself I saw as her and as the chapters went on her skin became darker.

She's autistic: Edward is her special interest and it doesn't help that she has trouble regulating her emotions. She definitely got them from Charlie.

She has aphantasia: The inability to imagine things. She still has thoughts, she just can't imagine. Not the reason why she's a shield though. The reason I think this is because I've come across many memes saying there's nothing going on in her head.

Renee is an abusive parent: She moved in with Charlie in an effort to get away from Renee. She's willing to suffer bad weather if it means no longer being parentified. What's worse is that Bella wasn't even looking after any children, she was looking after her own mother.

Jin Akanishi as Edward Cullen

He's 1/4 Japanese on his mother's side: I was trying my best not to imagine Robert Pattinson and the result ended up with me imagining Yoon Ji-hoo from Boys Over Flower (Korean ver). So yes, Edward is Asian.

He's a monster: I actually like the idea of Edward being quite evil, because let's face it he is in canon, but he prefers being a poser. He's evil in that typical vampire way where their humanity is almost gone.

Thinks Bella is cute when she's angry: Enjoys banter with Bella, so long as it's not misplaced.

Dakota Beavers as Jacob Black

He and Bella can relate: With the difference being that Billy isn't abusive.

Wolf: There's a spiritual side to it as well. Jacob isn't very in tune with his spiritual side, but he does occasionally try to communicate with his ancestors.

Little brother figure: Bro is 15 there's no way he's ending up with Bella. I think the conflict between him and Edward should lean onto Edward being dangerous with Jacob being protective rather than most of being relationship wise. Things between Jacob and Bella should always be platonic.

Greasy Hair

Everyone knows how Snape's hair is greasy, and a large percent of the fandom kind of demonises that. I personally think there's nothing wrong with greasy hair, and I'm saying this as someone who hates putting gel. I wonder, what if he keeps it greasy on purpose?

Just a funny idea I came up with. Say Snape has a genetic magic thing where his hair has a mind of its own and moves around to disrupt whatever he's doing or randomly attacks people out of the blue, and the only way to keep the hair from moving is applying grease or gel on it everyday. Every Prince had to put gel on their hair, or some kind of sticky substance to keep their hair from getting out of control.

I have a thing for hair manipulation in general (as you would see in my alien reader post), but I couldn't help but think this would be a funny scenario. Like Malfoy has attempted at giving Snape a hair makeover only to have multiple strings of hair swatting his face with Snape calmly saying "It doesn't like strangers." after which his hair wasn't brought up again. If anyone in Malfoy's inner circle were to bring it up he would give them a panicked warning.

I'm probably projecting, might make a fanfic out of this.

This post is also a good excuse to put some Yukako gifs.

Terry Silver + Daniel theory (essay)

(The only reason I actually watched Cobra Kai was for Terry Silver and the other chaos)

I believe Terry Silver is the real reason Daniel wanted Cobra Kai's extinction. Daniel was bullied by Johnny, but being bullied was nothing compared to what Terry did to him.

Daniel was being stalked, harassed and assaulted. To learn that Terry was the mastermind behind all of it must've been very frightening for him. From the very beginning, Terry's character is rooted in deception. Terry introduces himself as Kreese's old friend, but also portrays himself as someone Daniel can trust. He 'saves' Daniel from Mike Barnes. Meanwhile, he's breaking and entering into Mr Miyagi's home (while Daniel and Miyagi are there, that's bold), and shows up at the club while Daniel was hanging out with Jessica.

When Daniel tells Terry that he no longer wants any lessons once he realises what it's doing to him, Terry becomes chillingly cold. Daniel saw glimpses of this Terry during their training together, but now the mask has completely gone off. I cannot imagine how terrified Daniel must've felt.

Let's add Mike Barnes to the equation. Imagine some random boy shows up at your home and the store you're trying to build, vadalising property with his lackies, and beating you and your friend up, threatening you. You find out that your mentor and this boy were working with each other this entire time. To make things worse, you've been told that someone died. And then that person shows up and jump scares you.

It's pretty terrifying when you think about it.

Yes, Daniel was bullied by Johnny Lawrence, and it was bad. Being bullied isn't something people can easily move on from, especially with the different kinds of bullying people have experienced (physical, verbal ect.) On the other hand, being stalked is the sort of thing that makes you look over your shoulder for the rest of your life. Being deceived gives you trust issues. Daniel's problem wasn't Johnny Lawrence, it was Cobra Kai. Daniel found out that the reason Johnny was the way he was was because of Kreese. Not to mention, Kreese strangled Johnny in a fit of rage and smacked another student.

Going back to the 3rd film, Cobra Kai's teachings turned Daniel into someone he wasn't. Before Daniel was trained by Mr Miyagi he was a relatively decent person. Yes, he had a bad temper, but only because he was being provoked into behaving like that. We saw in the first film that Daniel's idea of revenge was sprinkling some water onto Johnny, which was nothing compared to what Johnny and his friends did to Daniel. When Daniel punched that guy at the club he immediately felt terrible, and tried to do the right thing. He went out of his way to call the police station so that he could apologise to the guy. He didn't enjoy what he did, he doesn't enjoy harming other people. Daniel's a hothead, but he's not a monster.

Fast forward to years later, and we see why Cobra Kai is bad. We saw it with Miguel. Yes, it teaches you confidence and what not, but it also teaches you to embrace your bad traits. With Johnny as the teacher it's not so bad, but when Kreese comes into the picture it's 10x worse. Hawk vandalised Miyagi-do. Tory started the school fight. They came to the LaRusso house to fight everyone there. (I haven't gotten over the fact that they threw a kid through a window).

Cobra Kai teaches you to become a bad person.

Terry Silver makes his return. The expression on Daniel's face isn't the same one he had when he re-meets Johnny. Terry gives Daniel a sincere apology, but Daniel rejects it. First of all, Terry shows up with Kreese, with the same hairstyle he had years ago. The fact that he showed up at all while there's a karate tournament that Daniel is involved in couldn't mean anything good.

The way Terry reacts to the rejection is concerning. It was as if he was entitled to it. If not entitled, then he expected his apology to be accepted. Like Mike's apology. Chozen's apology. Johnny's apology?

I firmly believe Daniel's rejection was the motive behind Terry's actions. Daniel tried to end Cobra Kai, only for Terry to come along and try to turn it into his legacy. Terry shows up to charity events that Daniel is involved in, and tries to break his marriage bit by bit.

Terry is obsessed with Daniel.

Both as a mentor and potentially something else. We know that Terry is a very capable mentor, as we've seen with his relationship with Kenny. It's kind of hinted that Terry himself was bullied, and we see glimpses of this in the war flashbacks. He's called 'Twig', and he didn't like that name. Mean nicknames are a version of name calling if you ask me.

Terry probably saw himself in Daniel, and felt like he could've shared a connection with Daniel were it not for the whole revenge thing. "There was always a little Cobra Kai in you." Whether he was correct doesn't matter, but the fact that he said it does.

Cobra Kai's philosophy is rooted in its origins. Master Kim used it to defend himself from Japanese soldiers during ww2. Knowing what the Japanese did during those times, I can see why he developed the whole "Strike first. Strike hard. No mercy."

Unlike Miyagi-do, which preaches inner peace and being a better version of yourself to defend yourself and others, Cobra Kai is the opposite. They turn your weakness (or gets rid of) into a weapon for destruction. To harm others before they can think of harming you. To intimidate other people so that they can never be comfortable. Cobra Kai is rooted in suffering. It's rooted in being angry at the world. The bullied becoming the bully.

Weakness is not allowed.

We saw this with Kenny. He went to Cobra Kai, and Kreese was anything but welcoming. Kenny had to prove himself before he could be trained. Even Robby was a little doubtful. Kenny is a mirror to Daniel. Terry's 'second chance'. Kenny wanted to learn self defense, but that turned into getting his lick back. Making Anthony's life a living hell. That could've become Daniel if it weren't for Miyagi and the fact that Daniel didn't enjoy hurting people.

I think that's what made Terry's mentorship with Kenny special. Kenny gave into the darkness, but Daniel rejected it. Daniel is the puppet who broke free.

I believe that's why Terry wanted (expected) his apology to be accepted. It not only showed that he became 'better', but it meant he still had some control over Daniel. After so many years (decades), Terry still refers to Daniel as 'Danny boy'. It implies that he still thinks he can easily access Daniel, or still shares an 'intimate' relationship even though they haven't seen each other for decades.

Terry was a competent teacher. If you remove the Cobra Kai cruelty and brainwashing, I think he would've been great. Yes, he came to the All Valley to become a sensei once again, but we all know he returned for the love of the game (Daniel). As stated before, Terry got upset from the fact that Daniel was forgiving everyone but him. Whenever he saw Daniel with anyone he would stare in rage. He was always pleased to show up unannounced to surprise Daniel.

We all know he hasn't changed, but going out of your way to wreak havoc just because someone rejected your apology is crazy work.

Hisoka: The Abilities outside Nen

Here's a rant from someone who's been a HxH fan since they were 10 (I'm 20 now)

Hisoka is one of my favourite characters if not my favourite villains next to Illumi. He immediately had my attention when I first saw him. I really saw him as a force of nature, and I loved how unpredictable he was. There would be moments where he came off as a psychotic killer, but also times where he seemed pretty chill. I could never quite figure out what was going through his mind.

These days I think the fandom, which is now filled with Gen Z-ers, have kind of turned him into a bit of a joke (not in a bad way), but I still remember him as the man who held a lot of mystery behind him.

Now there's just one thing I always wondered about him, and that was his abilities. We already know about Bungee Gum, and the fact that it has the properties of both rubber and gum, but I'm talking about before Togashi introduced nen to us.

We know that Hisoka is a magician, but are the abilities the result of bungee gum, or was he truly trained in some kind of trick? Does he have abilities outside of nen? One example I will use is the Zoldyck family. They are super humans, and have abilities outside of nen, like Killua's long nails and being immune to poison. Then there's the Freecss family. Even without nen, Gon was still a pretty damn strong kid, he broke Illumi's arm for crying out loud (I don't think that's spoken about enough). So we the viewers know that there's a handful of superhuman families, so it wouldn't be any surprise if Hisoka himself came from one.

We could say that it's just the 2011 version being creative, but the 1999 version has fun as well. In fact, I'll compare the two.

2011: When we are first introduced to him he burns off a guy's arm for bumping into him. His arms have turned into tiny petals. When Hisoka and Gon officially meet, he disappears into dust every time Gon tries to hit him. Usually, Nen users would blur when they move very fast. Hisoka has a bloodlust moment, and one butterfly becomes hundreds. When he takes the tag from Gon (after he punched him) he makes 4 copies of the tags.

1999: The guy seems to have melted into a wall instead of his arms being burned. Then there's his fight with the knife guy (ep 15, 1999), nothing too special, but it's what happens afterwards. In the 2011 version Hisoka still has the injury on his shoulder, but in the 1999 version he does a trick to make it disappear/heal instantly (most likely an illusion). The butterfly thing doesn't happen.

Not to mention Hisoka's bloodlust. Much like Illumi's, it gives a sense of unease to anyone who is of close proximity to it. Even going as far as to disturb nature. Hisoka is superhuman, even without the use of nen. Unfortunately, we don't see more of his 'magic' in the anime.

Dad Tsung incorrect quotes

Mileena: Shang Tsung wait! I didn't mean for that to happen!

Shang Tsung: Find out that everyone hates me? I don't care.

Mileena: Shang Tsung, please! Shang Tsung Stop!

Shang Tsung: No! Do you know what everyone says about you? They say you're a home schooled jungle freak who's a less hot version of me!

Context: I don't know. Mileena's been giving credit to Shao Kahn more than necessary.