World's Bestest Most Specialist War Criminal

tangled gave us so much, but mostly it gave us the beautiful and intense love of a horse and the man he is chasing in order to imprison

what are ukuleles made of?

Guitars that have shrunk in the laundry.

why is “get ___ed idiot” one of the funniest sentences in the english language

ok can I b the love of someone's life now

The other day on shift, I was walking down the hallway when a confused old man started yelling. This is fairly common in the hospital, so I ducked into his room and was like "hey dude what's up" and he's like "so sorry to yell but do you know where I am and what year it is" so I reoriented him to a bunch of stuff and explained why so many people were walking past his door, and he seemed much calmer and more oriented by the time we were done talking. And he says "and what's your name?" So I tell him "Sarah" and he stares at me so I repeat "Sarah" and he stares at me so I spell "S-A-R-A-H" and he stares at me so I show him my name badge and he stares at me and then he says "now forgive me for being so blunt. But I was under the impression that Sarah is a girls name. Is that no longer correct?"

Anyway y'all ever be so fucking gnc that you inadvertently gaslight a confused old man into thinking there's yet another part of the world he no longer understands?

Hey. Don’t fucking use Shutterstock.

So. I’m in deep shit because Shutterstock has no cancel plan button. Let me explain. Long story short, tried a free trial and tried to cancel after the free month was over. I called, they helped me cancel my account.

And then I got charged. Again.

So I call again. I think it gets cancelled again.

And then I get charged again. And I call again, get it cancelled. Repeat.

Keep in mind, I’m a fucking college student. I don’t have much money to begin with. At all. My only money is for testosterone, groceries, and emergencies, and OCCASIONALLY one nice thing every like. 3 or 4 months.

So I email them, after continuously trying to get ahold of them for 8. Months.

And I get this.

Read that closer, folks.

They’re charging me for the months worth of trying to cancel, thinking it was fine, and then trying to cancel again, only to be lied to.

Don’t use this shit. I thought I was getting a free trials and then was gonna cancel, and instead I’ve had money charged every 3 months, and then told I have to pay 160 dollars for the shit I already paid for.

I know this ain’t yelp but like. Fuck this bullshit.

the personification of death being portrayed as deeply kind in fiction is something that reduces me to tears every single time

I told my incredibly religious family "if I ever have children it will be against my will" and they just laughed....

I don't think they understood the implications that I was trying to say

Quackity: There’s a possibility you have two fathers *laughs* and there’s nothing bad with having two days, ok? One of them - one of them is a man called Luzu, and the other one is a man called Wilbur. How does that sound, son? Now we’re gonna have to choose and find out which one of them is gonna be your dad.

Tilin: *puts down a sign*

Quackity: Let’s see, what does it say? Move, move son I can’t read it.

Tilin’s sign: I’m la tres leches?

Quackity:

There were two huge cottonwood trees in my backyard growing up and now they're being removed

they're causing damage so they need to be removed but I'm just sad I have so many memories with those trees and now they're gone