I’m Late But Happy Sanders Sides 4th Anniversary ! It Took Me Quite Some Time To Ink And Color. I’m

infinity, and beyond

He remembers the first time he kissed Janus. He remembers the way they were curled up against each other, the lights dimmed and the television on low volume, neither of them paying attention to the images on the screen. It was messy and terrible, as far as kisses go, and Patton loved every moment of it, and when they pulled away from each other, they were both breathless, smiling, and he knew then that what he felt, Janus felt too.

He remembers, too, the moment he heard about Virgil.

It’s not every day that your husband’s long-lost kid breaks into your house. It’s not every day that you find out your husband of four years is an alien.

Patton’s just trying to roll with the punches.

Content Warnings: threats of violence, mild body horror, brief, non-graphic panic attack

Word Count: 7,168

Pairings: Moceit, parental Anxceit

(masterpost w/ ao3 links)

Patton’s day begins with a teenager holding a knife to his throat.

Technically, the day has already begun; it is mid-morning, the sun inching steadily toward noon. But Patton has barely been awake an hour, has been sitting at the kitchen table with his mug of coffee, staring at all the final exams he has yet to grade as he waits for his brain to start functioning. He likes Saturday mornings; he would go so far as to say that they’re usually his favorite part of the week, because usually, Saturday mornings mean sleeping in, wrapped in his husband’s arms, and later, a big brunch and a lazy day. But today, an emergency called Janus into the office, and he has a backlog of grading to finish this weekend, so here he is. Squinting, bleary-eyed, and with a sad lack of a husband to keep him company.

That is when the teenager appears.

Appears, because there is no better word for what happens. There is no break-in, no slamming of doors or shattering of windows. One minute, he is alone, and the next, there is another person in the kitchen, a young person who can’t be any older than seventeen or eighteen, and Patton barely has time to process that before they lunge for him, knocking him from his chair and to the floor, pinning him against the cool tile.

It takes a second to process the bite of cold, sharp metal against his throat, but as soon as he does, Patton wakes up very, very quickly.

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Roman… but happy

So cold that your stare's 'bout to kill me (Nicomas)

"I'm surprised when you kiss me"

Synopsis: Nico and Thomas's first date couldn't have gone better in Thomas's opinion.

Warning: Swearing, Spoilers for Flirting with Social Anxiety, gay-mess Thomas.

...

“Which reminds me; Sanders, you’ve been holding out on me!” Nico pointed his fry at Thomas, smirking accusingly.

The two were on their first date, and everything had been going real smooth, and Janus would call him out if Thomas denied how hard he was falling.

“Oh?” Thomas smiled and arched his brows. “Really?”

(“Shit , holy shit, what did we do? Oh God, what did we do?”)

(“Relax emo, he's teasing. We're fine!” Roman reassured.)

“When you said you made YouTube videos for a living, I didn’t think you had about 3 million subscribers!” Nico exclaimed, and Thomas could’ve sworn he saw his date's pupils dilate immensely.

(“Try not to flex, Thomas.” Janus smirked, clearly teasing Roman.)

(“Oh you know he won’t!” Patton nudged the snake side. Janus let out a hearty chuckle.)

“Well, I…” Thomas stammered, finding himself in a tizzy trying to figure out how to respond to that.

(“Virgil!” Roman scolded.)

(“Here, allow me.” Logan suggested, scooting closer to Roman.”)

“It didn’t really matter how big my subscription count was, I love each and everyone of my viewers and every single letter on the comments.” Thomas scratched the back of his head looking down on his burger.

(“Aww, Logan!” Patton and Roman cooed as Virgil and Janus smirked warmly. Logan denied the claims on his red meta-physical face.)

Nico smiled at Thomas, causing a flood of euphoria to come crashing down on him.

“Well, that's really sweet.” Nico said, placing his hand on Thomas’s.

He could hear the distinct screams of Patton and Roman in his head.

“Yeah, they mean a ton to me.” Thomas answered with a very sweet sigh.

There was silence between them for a while, but Thomas knew Nico had something to say, so they waited.

(“Shit, did we do something wrong? Fuck, is he mad?”)

(“Virgil, it's quite unlikely that he's mad at Thomas for not mentioning his subscriber count.”)

(“But what if he is?”)

(“Let's ask him shall we?” Janus said, scooting beside Roman.)

“What is it?” Thomas asked, biting his lower lip.

Nico looked him in the eyes, almost embarrassed. He mirrored Thomas' lip bite and intertwined his hand with Thomas’s own.

“Is this okay?” Nico asked.

Thomas gave up on trying to hide his smile hours ago. “Absolutely.” He echoed Janus’s words

(“This is… actually going great.” Janus remarked. Sarcasm and cynicism were absent from his statement.)

Nico exhaled. “Can I ask you something?”

(“Can I panic now?” Virgil asked, fingernails in between his lips.)

“Anything.” Roman made Thomas say.

Nico pursed his lips. “About Sanders Sides.”

Thomas could hear the simultaneous screams in his head, short-circuited by his date’s question.

“Oh jeez! Sorry, you don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to.” Nico stammered, redder than Roman's sashn fearing that he might have crossed a line.

“No, it’s fine!” Thomas said under Virgil’s influence.

(All the sides looked at their anxiety in awe.)

“The sides, well, they’re, sorta like, I guess,” Thomas stammered as Virgil looked to Roman and Janus for help.

“Sanders Sides is kind of my way of discussing my emotional issues and mental turmoil in a light, sort-of gentle way.”

(“Thanks, Logan.” Virgil relaxed a bit.)

“Are they…” Nico prompted, motioning to Thomas's head.

“Yeah, they are.” Thomas replied sheepishly.

“Cool…” Nico said breathlessly. “I love them.” Nico leaned in to pressed a kiss on Thomas’s lips.

Thomas let out a dignified squeak which Nico laughed at. He buried his face in his hands, hiding his embarrassment from his endeared datemate.

(“FIRST DATE AND WE ALREADY GOT A KISS!” Roman yelled. Virgil froze right where he sat. Patton got up and began running around the room.)

(“He said, the L-word…” Virgil muttered, causing everyone to stop. )

The screams in his head made Thomas flinch.

…

“Can I please sleep now?” Thomas groaned.

“Hun, his smile was so perfect, how did you get so lucky?” Remy sat at the foot of his bed legs crossed and day(night) dreaming.

Thomas buried his face in his pillow with a groan.

“And his voice! It was so dreamy! Boy, you can not let go of him!”

“Let me sleep! It's 2 am!”

Remy was right. Thomas just can’t let a boy like Nico go.

TAGLIST❤

@shadowjag , @wigsnatchedhoteltrivago , @arsonenthusiast , @i-love-my-dark-strange-sons @phantom-moonfire , @lostonehero , @awkward-child-of-satan , @deetheimposter , @ashtonbby2 , @lokiamorstuffs , @janus-the-sassy-snek-boi , @eeveeeclair246 @enragedbees , @franthehorsegir

Ask to be added or removed. Ilyasm!!!!

[click for better quality] Wanted to draw Jan with six hands so I did  Also just fyi I have instagram now! You can follow me on there if you want to see my art only with no reblogs in between :D It’s: ace_ace_in_yo_face_ @thatsthat24

an idea- Janus just being roman for some reason or another when suddenly patton apears. he asks if he can rant about something (Janus says yes) and procedes to indirrectly confess his feelings to Janus. -Vibe

ok hang on let me just---

He feels uncomfortable in his own skin, sometimes, so he slips into another. He never means any harm by it, not in moments like these, and especially not this time. But his scales are itching and irritated, so it is a relief to get rid of them for an hour or two, and he chooses Roman’s form because he knows that Roman and Remus are occupied with a project, and will be for hours yet. He doesn’t intend for anyone to see him, but it can’t hurt to be cautious.

He doesn’t intend for anyone to see him, so of course, someone does, in the one minute in which he rises into the kitchen, intent on fetching a snack and spending the rest of the day napping and watching soap operas until he feels vaguely like himself again.

“Hey, Roman?” someone asks, and someone is Patton, because of course it is. He can feel himself blushing already, so he places another illusion atop the first to mask it.

“Patton!” he says, turning to grin at him as Romanly as he possibly can. “What’s poppin’, padre?”

Patton smiles back, but--- there’s something off. A strange look in his eyes, like anticipation but not quite, almost a jitteriness. It doesn’t seem like anything bad, but it’s certainly a bit odd.

“I’m glad I caught you,” Patton says. “I kinda wanna talk about something? And I mean, no pressure if you don’t feel up to it, but I feel like I need to get it off my chest, and I think you might understand the best?”

He blinks, a tendril of guilt curling in his chest. This conversation isn’t meant for him. But he hardly wants to reveal himself now--- the moment for that, if there ever was one, has passed, and even besides that, he wants to know what’s on Patton’s mind. Selfish of him, he knows, and probably not precisely moral, but then, morality is hardly his area of expertise.

“Sure,” he says. “What’s up?”

Patton sighs, leaning against the wall. Some of the tension drains from his frame, and he crosses his arms, cupping his hands around his elbows.

“So, uh, I think I’m in love?” he says, and something in Janus’ heart shatters.

He knew, after all, that his own feelings would never be requited. That he would be better off keeping them to himself until he could force them away for good. But still, it hurts, deep inside, and he struggles to maintain Roman’s face.

“Oh?” he says, and fights to keep his voice even, to force down the tremor that wants to creep in. “Do tell.” And he winces, because that’s far more like his typical cadence than Roman’s, but somehow, Patton doesn’t seem to notice.

“I just---” he starts, and then cuts off shaking his head, his eyes squeezing shut. “I just feel so good? When I’m around him? He makes me really happy, and I want to spend time with him, like, all the time, and he’s been so kind and funny and he’s so pretty and I can’t stop thinking about how much I want to kiss him, so, uh. Y’know? I think it’s love?”

Bitterness is a potent drug. But he refuses to give in to it, refuses to hurt Patton because of it. He smiles, as warm and inviting as he can muster, encouraging him to go on.

“And literally everything he does, it makes my chest feel warm and fuzzy, like I’m floating and I never ever wanna come down. He laughed at a joke I made the other day and I wanted to just---” He flaps his hands around a few times--- “grab his hands and swing them around and just hold him for a little while.” He beams. “Did you know that he slurs his s’s when he’s excited? He did it when we were talking this morning and he was so embarrassed but I thought it was really cute and that’s when I figured out that I wanted to kiss him really, really bad.”

Wait.

“And have you ever looked at his scales?” Patton continues, completely unaware of the bomb he’s just dropped. “I mean, really looked? They’re all green-brown if you just glance at them but when you look at how they reflect the light, they’re actually a bunch of colors. A lot of yellow, but there’s greens and blues too, and gosh, they’re just so gorgeous.”

What?

Janus feels lightheaded.

“Do you think I should tell him?” Patton asks. Janus wrenches his attention back down to earth with an effort, and sees that Patton is peering at him now with worried eyes. “I guess that’s what I really wanted to ask, since you know the most about this kind of stuff. I think I want to tell him, but I’m scared he won’t feel the same way. I don’t know what I’d do with myself if I lost his friendship because of this.”

Janus is still reeling, is still stuck on I think it’s love, trying to reconcile that with the fact that Patton--- is talking about him? And that can’t possibly be right, because why on earth would Patton like him? But he can’t be talking about anyone else, because no one else hisses their s’s, no one else has scales, so it must be him. Patton loves him.

“Uh, Roman?”

He shakes himself. “Right, sorry,” he says, and his mouth is so dry, and he needs to think of something to say, something that will end this conversation, because he feels like he’s about to vibrate right out of his skin. He needs a moment to process this, to absorb it and allow himself to believe it. “I, uh, I think you should go for it. Take that leap!”

Patton stares at him. “You really think he’ll be alright with it?” he asks, soft and insecure.

“Patton,” he says, “I don’t know how he could possibly turn you down.”

He is, quite possibly, giving too much away with that. But Patton thinks he’s Roman right now, so he won’t realize that Janus has just confessed to the fact that he would do absolutely anything for him. Anything at all.

Patton grins, bouncing on his heels, his spirits seemingly buoyed. “Okay!” he says. “I think I’ll do that, then! Thanks, kiddo!”

Janus flashes him a smile, not trusting himself to say anything else, and he watches him go. The second Patton has left the kitchen, he drops his disguise, too overwhelmed to keep it up. He shakes his hands a few times, fiddles with the edge of his capelet, runs his finger down his scales, and when none of that feels like enough, he buries his face into his hands and squeals. He’s very, very glad that there is no one else around to see, because he simply can’t stop himself; there is too much emotion rising up inside of him, bursting out, eager to be free, to be expressed, and he can do nothing but let it out.

And when he’s calmed down just enough to think coherently, he sinks out and into his room. It seems that he has a confession of his own to prepare.

Yes

Consider: Werewolf Remus

Evidence:

Stinky!!

Excitable!

Rowdy boy!

Probably barks at mailpeople

Probably chases random strangers

Wants! To jump! Out of a moving car!!

Eats things he's not supposed to

Plays in the trash!

Roughhouses

Impulsive!!!!

Would probably eat dog biscuits

Likes yucky smells

200% is probably the type to tear the house up waiting for people to come back.

Just imagine him being Big! Lap! Dog!

Virgil: sorry I can't come to the party tonight

Roman: ugh! Why?

Virgil:

Soulmate September 3 - Animal that only you and your soulmate can see, dukexiety

@tsshipmonth2020

(Tw for breaking the law)

It was common courtesy to ignore your familiar when in public.  Petting and cooing at an invisible creature was considered rude to those around you- and Virgil was an expert at following social guidelines.  

Certainly, the little bat was horribly annoying, fluttering around his head and hanging from the collar of his shirt, but he ignored it better than anyone else he knew.  He'd even been asked a few times if he even had one, by people who asked questions that were just too invasive.

Still, it was rude to dote on your familiar in public, so when Virgil met his soulmate, he was less focused on the fact that he could see the transparent blue platypus on the man's shoulder and more focused on the fact that his soulmate was babying the thing, cooing and scratching it under its chin, petting it like it was a real animal.

Impulse alone had Virgil marching up to the park bench the man sat at and slapping his hand away from it.

"You aren't supposed to do that," he growled, and the other glanced at him with a surprised look on his face, eyes wide and a sickly green.  Then he grinned, and it was too sharp- a little too terrifying.

"There's a lot of things I'm not supposed to do that I still do, darling!  You want to hear another one?!" And without another word, he stood, smashed Virgil's cheeks between his hands, and kissed him.  Virgil jerked back, stumbling and tripping backwards over his feet when his soulmate released him, and he fell to the ground harshly as the man cackled.

"You're crazy," Virgil hissed, mind spinning with suddenly anxious thoughts.  "We aren't supposed to kiss until we get registered, you just broke the law, what is wrong with you?!"

"Bleh, conservative laws never really suit me!  Wanna do it again?  Felt nice, didn't it?" He grinned.  Virgil hated the fact that he was right, he was already craving more.

"I don't even know your name yet," he said instead of answering the question, and the man gave a dramatic bow.

"Remus, at your service, beautiful!" He exclaimed, then squatted in front of the fallen one.  "Wow!  So you got a bat?  He's so cute!  I've always loved bats!  Imagine flying with your fingers!" His voice was practically a squeak as he reached out to Virgil's familiar, and the bat flew from Virgil's collar to immediately rest in Remus' hand, squeaking as he pet and scratched its little head.

"I can't believe that you're what I got stuck with," Virgil said in a whispered tone, and Remus flinched, though his smile didn't falter.

"Yeah, I expected that kind of reaction," he said.  "My brother always used to tell me that not even my soulmate could love me, so I'm not surprised.  That's why I wanted to kiss you right away!  If we get registered, you can never be with anyone else, but I wanted to be a little selfish before I let you go!" He blew on the bat so it took the hint to flutter back to Virgil.  "At least this way you'll be able to be with a soulless.  I was just- fate's mistake," he giggled emptily.  Virgil's bat chirped sadly.

"... that's not-" Virgil started, but faltered.  "Fate isn't ever wrong," he said in a final tone, and Remus glanced to him, lips pouted outward.

A beat, and then-

"You're kinda stupid," Remus said, and he was cackling again as Virgil's face turned red.

"It's not!" He insisted as his soulmate laughed at him. "Really!"

"Okay," Remus said, cackles lowering to giggles.  "Prove it.  Prove that fate isn't wrong."

"How do I do that?"

Remus pretended to think before speaking.  "We could always kiss again.  Or do another lovely little crime, maybe~ wanna burn down a building?  Shoplift?"

For a moment, Virgil was silent, and then- "... Graffiti?" He suggested softly, and his soulmate immediately brightened.

"So I didn't get completely stuck with a Do-Gooder!"

"One painting, and then we get registered, like we're supposed to."

"Sure, if you still believe fate is 'never wrong' after spending that much time with me!"

Slowly, Virgil pushed himself up, avoiding the other's gaze.  "... I know a spot that's out of the public eye.  We won't get caught.  I just… I haven't, in a while."

"Abandoned your life of crime to follow the path of good?  How boring!  Well, I'm glad we were assigned to each other- I get to drag you right back!"

Virgil snorted.  "As if.  This is one crime, and then we're doing things my way- registration, and seeing where we go from there."

Remus smiled in a way that had Virgil doubting he understood, but he decided he could handle it.  If he didn't learn to love this guy, it meant fate was wrong- that everything Virgil had been taught was wrong.

It wasn't like there was nothing to admire.  Remus had a pretty face.  But… well, as far as Virgil could see so far… that was it.  That was the only thing in it for him, and he wasn't near that shallow, to be satisfied with looks.  And yet…

"I'm Virgil, by the way," he huffed, turning on his heel to lead the way, and Remus jumped to follow.

"Nice to meetya!" Remus cheerfully squeaked.  "You got money?"

"Enough to get paint, yeah," he huffed.  Then, after a pause, "... we are not shoplifting the paint."

"Aw," the other said with a pout that was bordering on cute.

Once they'd bought the spray paint, Virgil led Remus through a few alleyways and into an abandoned building.  Experienced hands pulled a green paint and a purple paint from his bag, shaking them almost carelessly as they passed dozens of graffiti covered walls.

"This place has been abandoned for years," he explained.  "They're gonna tear it down later this summer, so there's really no harm in-"

"Are all of these yours?" Gasped Remus in an awed voice, and Virgil spun his head to see the other tracing his fingers wide-eyed over the paintings.  The building was dark, but light shone through a window, reflecting off the silver dye in Remus' hair and his green eyes.  The low light turned his eyes from a sickly green to an emerald.  He was practically shining.  Virgil barely held in a gasp.

"Uh," he exclaimed intelligently.  "Yeah, they're mine."

"They're fantastic," Remus exclaimed, and Virgil found his cheeks going pink.  Which was a good sign, but he still despised the added embarrassment.  

"...yeah, they're whatever," Virgil said, looking away.  "Let's just get this over with so we can get registered."

"You really have a one track mind, huh?" Remus giggled.  "This is bonding time, my darling!  Have a little fun!" He shoved past Virgil, yanking the green paint from his hand and spraying it across the wall.  Up and down as he walked, and then a little ways away, he stopped.  "Perfect!" The man exclaimed, having written "Fuck" across the wall in fancy cursive letters.  Virgil just felt he should be impressed that Remus had done it backwards.

"That's a waste of space," he declared, and Remus rolled his eyes.

"You said they were tearing it down anyway.  No need to be a perfectionist for art that's gonna get destroyed!"

"...yeah, I guess you're right," Virgil huffed, but still pulled his own paint back further to spray at Remus' work, littering the word with speckles of purple.

"Nice," Remus declared.  "You just committed a crime."

"You have made me commit multiple crimes today."

"I didn't force you to do this.  You wanted to, didn't you?  Just as easily, we could have kissed again, and that'd be that.  And yet…" Remus trailed off with a grin.  "Here we are.  The crime you wanted to do."

Virgil didn't dignify that with a response for a second.  "... it's just been a while, okay?" He said as he found a clear stretch of wall.  He pulled out a pink spray and began to shake it.  "I used to do this all the time in high-school.  It was a stress thing."

"So?" Remus prompted, and Virgil hummed a confused note when he didn't continued.  "Did you stop being stressed?"

"No," Virgil replied with a short laugh, spraying his paint across the wall.  "I think I just- stopped having the extra time."

"But you enjoy it," Remus stated, and Virgil paused, deliberating on his answer.  

"... yeah, I enjoy it.  That doesn't make it good to do."

"If you're gonna be registered to me, you're gonna have to get used to doing bad things.  It's my whole brand," he said cheerfully, petting the head of the platypus still lazily hanging off of his shoulder.  

If he hadn't felt so relaxed by all this, Virgil might have argued- but there was something about returning to graffiti that soothed all the anxieties he had.  

He hadn't been this relaxed since he was a kid.

"I think I can handle that," he finally said.  "Every once in a while.  Not all the time, but… special occasions.  Your birthday."

"And Christmas!" Remus exclaimed, and Virgil rolled his eyes.

"Every other holiday."

"Deal!  We'll work our way up from there, won't we?" He said, and he was talking to the platypus now.  Virgil blinked at it carefully before setting his paints down.

"Can I-?" He faltered, but he didn't need to ask.  Remus smiled, and without another word, he lifted the platypus from his shoulder to hold out to the other.

"We're not technically in public… He likes getting scratched on the head," Remus explained.  "Especially the back.  Just be careful because some platypuses- platypi? Have spurs on the back of their heels, and while I don't know if that translates to life from the soul realm I do think it is worth looking out for," he said, nodding sagely.

Virgil nodded, careful as he placed a hand on the creature's forehead.  It was oddly soft- softer than his bat, he thought, which was currently resting on Remus' head.  It made a strange little noise as he pet it before he finally, very carefully lifted the lazy thing into his arms.  

"Oh," he breathed softly.  "He's actually kinda cute.  Really weird looking, but cute.  Suits you."

"Aw, you think I'm cute," Remus giggled, but stopped as Virgil nodded.

"I do.  You are."

He really didn't have much to say to that.  Except…

"Would you mind breaking that law again?" He asked, and Virgil blinked away from the platypus to Remus.  "That- I mean-"

"Kiss?" Virgil asked, and Remus nodded eagerly.  

Virgil glanced again to the platypus in his arms, to the barely-there graffiti on the walls, and focused on the relaxed feeling in his chest- focused on how now, in this moment, he had never felt less afraid of the law.

"Have I convinced you that fate is always right, yet?" He teased instead of answering.

"I think I'll know for sure if I get to kiss you again," Remus responded, so Virgil leaned forward, tilting his chin up just a little and pecking the kiss to his lips- holding it there for a few seconds, and when he pulled back, Remus looked gorgeously dazed.

"... alright, you win," Remus said on a breath.

Surrounded by graffiti and having broken the law three times in one day with the full intention to do it again, Virgil wondered if that was the truth for just a second before he decided that they were very much both winners in this situation.

oops almost forgot to upload this Your Highness, King Roman.

soulmate september / day eighteen: what a bunch of a-holes

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17

Day Eighteen: Your soulmates first impression/thoughts about you are written somewhere on your body.

Summary: “What an asshole”. Virgil’s absolutely terrified about these words, and he tries to be kind to people, but it’s so difficult sometimes. Janus just thinks that everyone is an asshole.

Ship: Anxceit (Virgil x Janus)

word count: 520

CW: Janus is nonbinary and uses xe/xem pronouns

TW: anxious thoughts. brief familial moxiety. mentions of butts (…and yet Remus is not in this one?). seriously, the word “asshole” is written here at least 10 times.

@tsshipmonth2020

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