Himchan Kim’s Portrait Of  Ilja Van Vuuren

Sick sick sick of possibility of being fucking recorded every waking second by tiktok obsessed quasi celebs. Video titled something like "Caught him thinking he's the main character" but it was just a kid wearing headphones, looking out the bus window. Of course it was posted without his knowledge. Stop recording strangers and everything you see, nobody gives a shit and not everyone is happy to be on tiktok or youtube because of a moron with no braincells and an account. What could be a forgettable awkward moment is now permanently there for the victim of lackabrainis infested idiot to get anxious about forever.

polish government has opened a website for ukrainians seeking safety and trying to cross the ukrainian-polish border:

ua.gov.pl

as of 13:10 polish time, it has been said as many people as possible will be let through the borders. they are also supposed to let through children who do not have passports, as to not divide families.

Hybrid Note Taking Style

A note taking method that blends the best of paper and digital note taking that I’ve been exploring lately. So far it’s working really well for me :) Hope it helps! 

Hybrid Note Taking Method

Problems with other note taking systems

Each note taking system has its pros and cons. Here are some of the problems I found with (fully) paper and (fully) digital note taking systems.

Paper

Can’t use the search function on your notes.

Can’t add images and other types of digital files easily.

Difficult to keep overview between notebooks.

Can’t share these as easily as digital notes.

Digital

Not as ‘romantic’.

Sometimes less engaging.

Lack of physical presence can lead to you forgetting about it.

Can be more difficult to do things like sketching, making schemes, making illustrations etc.

Benefits of Hybrid

I like using hybrid methods because they bring you the best of both worlds.

Easily searchable.

Information in your notes is traceable.

Makes it easier to find and carry out actions e.g. finding extra info.

Doesn’t damage books.

Allows you to embed different types of files.

What you’ll need

Source material (e.g. book, academic paper)

Any kind of notebook :)

Digital note-taking app → I like Notion (it’s free).

Step 1 - Read & number the material

As you go, use a pencil to lightly put numbers into the margins whenever you deem something worthy of noting down or remembering. This will help you locate the source of specific parts of your notes later.

Step 2 - Write Q&A-style notes

Write the information down in question-and-answer style. Come up with useful questions that link to the material you want to remember (e.g. Q → What is the main problem with using platform-based planning for new ventures? A → Assumptions underlying the plan are used as fact rather than best-guess estimates to be tested and questioned). Use the numbers you placed in the margin of the pages to specify the source of the information you used for each answer.

Example → Chapter 1 page 27 note 3 becomes 1.p27.3

Step 3 - Write actions as you go (Supporting notes)

Supporting notes

Write down your thoughts, anything you’re curious about, things you want to look up, things you’re confused about, actions you’ve been inspired to do, etc. For example → ?m Maybe I can apply this to my visualization assignment? / ! Look up what 'plurality of the future’ is / fex Organizational transformation through design. I find this a great way to support and manage the learning process.

Action key

Keep a small action key in which you have an overview of what your action marks mean (e.g. ?m→ questions to myself, f → find, fex → find example, ?? → I don’t get it, ! → general actions)

Don’t be afraid to customize your actions!

What you’ll get

Actionable notes

Your paper notes will contain a structured and easy to read overview of actionable items that came up during the reading. This can be questions you need answered, reminders to find specific information, etc. This will make them a lot harder to forget to do!

Easily traceable sources

With the codes you’ll be able to tell easily and quickly where the information you’ve written in your notes came from.

Searchable & review-ready notes

Notes will be (mostly) made in question-and-answer style. This will allow you to easily review using active recall. All you need to do is cover/hide the answer and you can check how well you truly know the material.

Thanks for reading!

Miss Faelicy I would love to get your opinion on Bingqiu.

I see people posting things like how they are "problematic" and how they don't really love each other and SQQ only feels sympathy etc. Obviously there were struggles between them as there should be (considering all that happened) and just because sqq wasn't very open and super obvious about his feelings doesn't mean they are not there..this is how I interpreted it. I would love to know your opinion

Hello! This also covers part 2 of the previous ask.

First, massive spoilers for the end of the novel. Second, a disclaimer: I despise shipwars, which I think are behind most of those comments. I hate them because it's usually all in bad faith: everyone's already committed to their interpretation of the ships, and any discussion is just a guise for justifying their preferences.

So to any readers: I don't want anything here to be used as shipwar fuel. This post is about Bingqiu's canon arc and themes. Basically, I don't know or care if Bingqiu is a good ship, but I do think it's a well-written one.

I'll start by saying directly: for most of the novel, Bingqiu is neither healthy nor romantic. And that this is not bad writing, but on purpose.

A relationship that drives one party to mental breakdown isn't healthy. A relationship where that party says it's okay to hurt or kill them can't possibly be healthy. That happened because there was something deeply wrong with their relationship, something that can't be reduced to Xin Mo, miscommunication, or LBH throwing a tropey yandere fit.

And out of all three MXTX novels, only SV lacks a love confession from the MC to the ML. Again, I don't think it's an oversight, or just because SQQ's face is too thin. There are plenty of ways MXTX could have worked a subtle one in if she really wanted to.

In my opinion, Bingqiu's narrative can be split up into four arcs: Qing Jing Peak (ch 1-27), Jin Lan City (28-43), Post-revival (29-55), and Reconciliation (56-81). Other than the first arc, where their relationship is pretty straightforward, Bingqiu spend most of the rest in direct conflict.

I'll give an overview of the arcs here, but what I truly want to say about Bingqiu starts in arc 4, so if you're impatient you can scroll down. But the overview might help add context.

Jin Lan City arc is about LBH's anger at being brutally betrayed by the one person he thought he could trust. Here he tries to force answers out of SQQ, who he believes both hates him and is a hypocrite. He's driven by a desire to return to the past, but his rage and love makes his actions contradictory: on one hand he tries to win SQQ's approval constructively, by climbing to the top of Huan Hua Palace and performing good deeds, on the other hand his belief that SQQ doesn't care about him so it's all futile anyway (reinforced by SQQ's own actions) causes him to lash out destructively, going as far as to hurt and imprison SQQ.

LBH's bitterness is portrayed very negatively, because all it does is instill despair into SQQ, until SQQ ends up believing that he's only been a blight on LBH's life, and that he must make up for it by killing himself. Whereupon LBH breaks down, regressing into a childlike state. Some might ask, why does LBH never bring up the Abyss again afterwards? It's because he gives up here. This entire arc is about getting LBH to let go of past wrongs and to stop seeking answers, whether the reader believes it's fair to him or not. Because SQQ's life is more important.

Post-revival arc then is about SQQ trying to come to terms with a blackened LBH who also loves him. Interestingly, despite SQQ's horror at realizing LBH was romantically interested in him all along, SQQ actually has a very subtle but telling secondary reaction. To explain, let's back up to the first arc.

Starting around ch 9, probably as a sign of his growing affection, SQQ begins addressing LBH as 这孩子, or "this child," in his internal monologue, instead of LBH's name. He does it once each in ch 9, 12, 17, 21, 25. However, once Jin Lan City arc starts, SQQ drops the address entirely. LBH and "child" are never brought up together except for one snarky comment on LBH's tantrum being disgracefully childish in ch 38.

At first glance this doesn't look noteworthy because LBH by this point is no longer a kid. But when LBH kisses him in ch 49, SQQ changes again: right away he returns to using "child" on LBH, and the "this child" address starts popping up at a much higher frequency. By the end of SV SQQ has referred to LBH as a child in some manner at least 35 times (yes I went and counted), with the vast majority after ch 49, and he continues to do so right into the last extra.

Why was SQQ unwilling to use this address of affection for over 20 chapters? Perhaps because he too thought LBH hated him, and couldn't bear to think about him so intimately knowing that. So SQQ immediately falling back into it the moment he learns LBH loves him is a sign of his relief. He's still dismayed at the romantic part, but though SQQ likes to deflect from his real emotions (this is the guy who focused on bad naming sense after being fatally poisoned, who cavalierly commented only after it was all over that he'd expected to die), the fact that LBH loves and doesn't hate him, means a lot.

Here SQQ's feelings towards LBH are at their most complicated. He still assumes the worst of him like in Jin Lan City, but now because of the above, also sees a lonely child whenever LBH is unhappy and lost. It's like he has two filters actively interfering with each other, "crazed criminal" and "pitiful child," and so he flip-flops between pushing LBH away and comforting him. But when LBH drags CQMS into it, and even seemingly takes advantage of SQQ's love for him, SQQ's negative image and frustration with him only grows, until he finally snaps and tells LBH to never come near him again.

At this point SQQ still believes that LBH is the same black-hearted, invincible, devil incarnate that og!LBH was portrayed to be. The Reconciliation arc starts by chipping away at this filter that's been plaguing SQQ for so long. First the revelation that TLJ/ZZL was behind the sowers, thus clearing LBH's name at Jin Lan City. Then we see how unloved he is by his own father; we see him injured and helpless and unconscious. Meng Mo yells at SQQ, reinforcing that image of a vulnerable, terrified child. So by ch 62 SQQ has thrown away the "crazed criminal" filter completely, and in that same chapter they cling to each other and finally make up. Because while it's true that the current LBH is misanthropic, antisocial, and mercurial, SQQ has also finally accepted that he's still the same LBH he'd raised and doted on, back on Qing Jing Peak.

Now I'm going to talk about what I see as the most important part of Bingqiu. Yes, despite the wall of text already.

A common sentiment of Bingqiu shippers about their issues seems to be, "SQQ is dumb and oblivious; he can't figure out what LBH needs even though he loves him because he sees LBH as a novel character," but I think the problem is far more complicated and insidious than that. If that was everything, why give SQQ the epiphany that he misunderstood LBH so early? Why have him think in ch 66 that "truthfully, he'd never really trusted Luo Binghe, and that's why he kept accidentally hurting him?" If he's already realized that he shouldn't treat LBH like og!LBH (he even meets og!LBH in ch 71 to rub it in further), why do we go another 13 chapters believing their relationship is good and well, even giving us a sweet, happy moment in ch 75, only to show LBH having the worst breakdown of the novel just 4 chapters later? Was it all just padding to demonstrate the danger of Xin Mo?

Or is there something else beneath the surface?

In ch 66, the same chapter where SQQ implies he doesn't want to accidentally hurt LBH anymore, he says something telling. When LQG is skeptical that LBH can be trusted, SQQ thinks, 家里孩子不懂事，大人不容易做, or "when your child doesn't know any better, as the adult you don't have it easy." The child here of course refers to LBH, and the adult is SQQ, who's complaining about smoothing over LBH's messes. But what is SQQ implying here?

Doesn't know any better? That's what you say about a toddler who can't think for themselves, not a grown man. LBH is 25 and SQQ thinks he doesn't know better. Doesn't know better about what? LBH's wants, his needs? His feelings? Or even what's good for him?

And then you realize that's exactly how SQQ's always treated him, like a helpless child who can't make his own choices.

It's SQQ who chooses to throw LBH down into the Abyss without trying to talk to him. It's SQQ who decides that keeping silent is the best choice. It's SQQ who believes self-destructing in front of LBH will help, who thinks that breaking off their relationship is for the better. And it's SQQ who scolds LBH into tolerating CQMS, even though they hate each other and CQMS is hostile towards him. Who forces him to leave first at Zhao Hua Temple despite LBH's pleas otherwise, who shoos him out the window when CQMS walks in on them.

Every single one of these decisions, SQQ made believing it was for the best (repair LBH's relationship with his family, help him avoid arrest, not wanting to make excuses, wanting LBH to be free of his hatred), and every single one of them only damaged LBH further. Because SQQ's never listened to him, even once. Never consulted him or considered his feelings.

(And LBH did try to bring up his feelings on one of the matters in ch 75. He insinuates to SQQ that he doesn't like LQG calling him "little beast" or "ingrate." And SQQ's response is to dismiss them entirely, saying that LQG's "not wrong.")

SQQ has always loved LBH, but he's never once respected LBH's agency or personhood. Because LBH doesn't know better and SQQ does, so SQQ must make all his decisions for him.

And this, amplified by Xin Mo, is what finally drives LBH mad in ch 79.

To LBH, the important part isn't whether SQQ loves him, which I think he knew after ch 43 (it's why he can be so daring and pushy with SQQ's boundaries). What's important is that the moment SQQ believes abandoning LBH is justified for whatever reason again, SQQ absolutely will.

Ch 80's two-way noncon (since LBH was basically unconscious and couldn't consent) tends to draw most of the attention, but I actually think that what happens afterwards is one of the most important scenes for Bingqiu. There SQQ tries to sacrifice himself a second time for LBH, drawing Xin Mo's demonic qi into his body. Yet the novel claims that SQQ's actions here are completely different than in ch 43. SQQ himself says that this time he's doing it for LBH, while last time he was doing it for himself. But can the reader see a functional difference?

There is one, in fact: it's SQQ's response to LBH's choice afterwards. LBH decides to follow SQQ in death, even though this would void the point of SQQ's sacrifice. But instead of insisting otherwise, SQQ just accepts it. Because he finally understands that whether LBH's life is worth living, whether LBH will be better off, is for LBH and only LBH to decide.

It's the first time he respects LBH's agency. And this is the only reason why he and LBH can finally begin building a healthy relationship on the mess they've had up to now.

So that's what I see as the true beauty behind Bingqiu. It's about communication and mistaken assumptions, yes, but it's also about the nature of love between parent and child. The romantic developments were left to the extras, I believe, because this was the main story MXTX wanted to tell with them. Their relationship as lovers only starts afterwards, hence why SV ends with, "the story between you and I, has only just begun." It was never meant to be a whirlwind romance where they fall in love cleanly. It might not to be to everyone's tastes, but an incredible amount of thought was put into the narrative, and that's what amazed me when I first finished this novel.

(This post went on way too long and I ended up cutting off a huge chunk of tangential stuff and how SQQ came to his realization in ch 79: he didn't do it alone. It took him seeing the LBH in TLJ and the himself in YQY for him to understand. In fact, YQY and og!SQQ's relationship has a similar parent-and-child dynamic. I've touched on it before on twitter; if there's interest I might try writing that up here too.)

Pauline’s book recs : a MASTERPOST (II)

Shit, it’s 2020 and I’ve updated this Behemoth again. There’s both old and new in here. If you’re having problems with links overlapping, it is most likely the app/dashboard glitching—try the permalink version, and everything should work out, even on mobile. And of course, HAVE FUN.

Also: I had to split this one in two otherwise the links just poof, disappear. Part one is here.

THEMATIC LISTS By character Works featuring Persephone Works featuring Kassandra Works featuring Mary Magdalene Works featuring Narcissus (more or less) Works featuring male protagonists written by women Works featuring the House as a character Works featuring brothers Works featuring assassins Works featuring mermaids Works featuring musicians Works about scorned women and complex character development Works featuring the femme fatale archetype Works featuring female villains Works with Nature as a character Works with supernatural entities as a human double Works with introspective characters Works with narcissistic characters Works with “fatally-flawed” (hubristic) characters Romances featuring softer male protagonists Trope : Star-crossed lovers Trope : Friends to lovers Trope : Villainous love Trope : Toxic mother figure Trope : adaptating Beauty and the Beast Trope : adaptating Bluebeard By theme LGBTQ+ (a terribly old and lacking list) About love: pretty much a whole bibliography Suspense galore: books with good foreshadowing Suspense galore: a few good plot-twists Books taking place in a single building Books taking place in one House Books taking place in a high school Books with dysfunctional families Books about seeing into the Future Books by the sea (and a few pirates) Books set in Paris Books about hubris Books about loneliness and solitude Books about finding one’s life purpose Books about girlhood Books about introspection and self-discovery Books about melancholy and sadness Books about happiness and hope Books with symbolism and atmosphere Books about moral corruption and spiritual decadence Books about sex politics and philosophy Books about the female rage Books about or taking place during World War I Books featuring suicides Poems for mothers Poems about poetry Great love stories Unusual love stories Idealised, bittersweet love ; more By genres Rewriting Greek and Roman myths Rewriting Fairy Tales ; and again Writing and rewriting Arthuriana Favourites free-to-play text-based games Experimental literature Gothic and neo-gothic Southern Gothic Magical realism ; a few more Dystopias Young Adult Horror novels (but check the gothic instead) Crime novels Thrillers (thriller night); more Medieval historical fiction Sweet sweet comfort reads Just, like, sappy stuff

By context Beach reading Travel reading Halloween reading (spooky!) Winter reading Summer reading ; another Lockdown reading (you can still ask!) By book Books similar to The Secret History Books similar to Wuthering Heights ; again Books similar to Memoirs of Hadrian Books similar to Brideshead Revisited Books similar to A Grief Observed Books similar to The Brothers Karamazov Books similar to On Being Ill Books similar to Eros the Bittersweet Books similar to Dracula Books that might remind you of Avatar the Last Airbender if you squint Excerpts similar to Dido and Aeneas’ parting in the Aeneid Recommended editions of Romeo and Juliet Recommended editions of Shakespeare’s Sonnets Recommended editions of Wuthering Heights Recommended translations of Tristan and Yseult Some links to Rainer Maria Rilke’s Book of Hours Some links to a few of Mary Oliver’s works Lit criticism on Dorian Gray Lit criticism on Sonnets to Orpheus Books adapted to the screen (1) Books adapted to the screen (2) By author Favourite French writers Favourite Contemporary writers What to read? By Women French writers What to read? By Anne Carson (And some prep reading for Anne Carson) What to read? By Richard Siken What to read? By Roland Barthes What to read? By Agatha Christie What to read? By E. A. Poe What to read? By Daphné du Maurier What to read? By Sylvia Plath What to read? By Priya Sarukkai Chabria What to read? By Hélène Cixous What to read? On and by Branwell Brontë What to read & which translation? For Marguerite Yourcenar Which translation? For Hafez If you love Anne Carson If you love Angela Carter ; more If you love Louise Glück If you love Virginia Woolf If you love Sylvia Plath If you love Marguerite Duras If you love Emile Zola If you love Colette

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Resources for Writing Injuries

Patreon || Ko-Fi || Masterlist || Work In Progress

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Head Injuries

General Information | More

Hematoma

Hemorrhage

Concussion

Edema

Skull Fracture

Diffuse Axonal Injury

Neck

General Information

Neck sprain

Herniated Disk

Pinched Nerve

Cervical Fracture

Broken Neck

Chest (Thoracic)

General Information

Aortic disruption

Blunt cardiac injury

Cardiac tamponade

Flail chest

Hemothorax

Pneumothorax (traumatic pneumothorax, open pneumothorax, and tension pneumothorax)

Pulmonary contusion

Broken Ribs

Broken Collarbone

Abdominal

General Information

Blunt trauma

Penetrating injuries (see also, gunshot wound & stab wound sections)

Broken Spine

Lung Trauma

Heart (Blunt Cardiac Injury)

Bladder Trauma

Spleen Trauma

Intestinal Trauma

Liver Trauma

Pancreas Trauma

Kidney Trauma

Arms/Hands/Legs/Feet

General Information | More

Fractures

Dislocations

Sprains

Strains

Muscle Overuse

Muscle Bruise

Bone Bruise

Carpal tunnel syndrome

Tendon pain

Bruises

Injuries to ligaments

Injuries to tendons

Crushed Hand

Crushed Foot

Broken Hand

Broken Foot

Broken Ankle

Broken Wrist

Broken Arm

Shoulder Trauma

Broken elbow

Broken Knee

Broken Finger

Broken Toe

Face

General Information

Broken Nose

Corneal Abrasion

Chemical Eye Burns

Subconjunctival Hemorrhages (Eye Bleeding)

Facial Trauma

Broken/Dislocated jaw

Fractured Cheekbone

Skin & Bleeding

General Information (Skin Injuries) | More (Arteries)

femoral artery (inner thigh)

thoracic aorta (chest & heart)

abdominal aorta (abdomen)

brachial artery (upper arm)

radial artery (hand & forearm)

common carotid artery (neck)

aorta (heart & abdomen)

axillary artery (underarm)

popliteal artery (knee & outer thigh)

anterior tibial artery (shin & ankle)

posterior tibial artery (calf & heel)

arteria dorsalis pedis (foot)

Cuts/Lacerations

Scrapes

Abrasions (Floor burns)

Bruises

Gunshot Wounds

General Information

In the Head

In the Neck

In the Shoulders

In the Chest

In the Abdomen

In the Legs/Arms

In the Hands

In The Feet

Stab Wounds

General Information

In the Head

In the Neck

In the Chest

In the Abdomen

In the Legs/Arms

General Resources

Guide to Story Researching

A Writer’s Thesaurus

Words To Describe Body Types and How They Move

Words To Describe…

Writing Intense Scenes

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Masterlist | WIP Blog

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BATMAN & ROBIN.

testing testing

alright, I think I’ve found the saddest timeline

Wei Wuxian opened his eyes, which was a surprise, because he was fairly sure he’d died. 

The first thing he saw was an explanation: a crude but carefully sketched array drawn in blood on the floor around him, a version of something he’d once worked on to offer one’s body to a vengeful ghost. The host soul to be destroyed. 

The second thing he saw was a message scrawled on the wall in the same red ink, much more sloppily: That son of a whore killed Jin Ling. Ignore Huaisang, just kill them all. 

The third thing, looking down, was hands as familiar as the ones he’d been born with, recognizable even without the bloodied purple sleeves and silver ring on one finger, inset amethyst sparking with lightning.