I’m curious about something. Is there concrete evidence of John attempting to strike Linda? I’ve. seen it mentioned various places but I’m a little skeptical. If it’s true that seems like it would be very hard for Paul to forgive. Your thoughts? Thanks.
Hiya @missu4everjohnny,
So for anyone reading this post who might not already be familiar with the story in question, Ill give you some brief business context:
The company Northern Songs was set up in 1963 by Dick James and Charles Silver, in order to publish Lennon/McCartney songs.
February 1965 it became a public company on the London Stock Exchange.
John and Paul each have 750,000 shares (15% each), while George and Ringo have 40,000 (0.8 %) each. During his divorce, John sold over 100,000 of his shares in order to set up a trust fund for Julian. Paul on the other hand bought 1000 shares (or 0.02% of the company).
By January 1969, Dick James had a growing concern about John Lennon’s recent behaviours, and the negative consequences they may have for the Northern Songs company in terms of stock value.
March 1969, Dick James and Charles Silver sell their shares in Northern Songs to ATV for £1,525,000, giving John and Paul no notice or the chance to buy them out. That way, ATV acquired 1,604,750 shares, which, in addition to the 137,000 they already had, gave them nearly 35% of the company.
John and Paul, who were both away on their honeymoons as they received the news about Northern Songs, felt betrayed and upset by James’s choice to sell his shares.
In April 1969, John found out that he had 644,000 shares (£1.25m), while Paul had 751,000 shares (£1.4m). John was furious with Paul.
@thecoleopterawithana did a particularly good breakdown on this whole saga, touching on both the business logistics and the emotional responses within it from John and Paul. So massive credit due to them for explaining the Northern Songs situation in a way that My-Little-Pea-Brain can actually understand, and do go give their post a read for a far more comprehensive understanding of all this!
But onto Johns reaction and whether he did in fact attempt to physically assault Linda McCartney.
Ken McNab writes in his book And In The End: the last days of the Beatles:
Various accounts over the years have suggested the two men almost came to blows. One unverified report has the volatile Lennon shaking his fist at Linda McCartney with Klein holding him back. Sheepishly, McCartney tried to defend his underhand actions: ‘I had some beanies and I wanted more.’ (pg. 101)
And Peter Doggett wrote in You Never Give Me Your Money:
Then Klein informed Lennon that McCartney had secretly been increasing his stake in Northern Songs. ‘John flew into a rage,’ recalled Apple executive Peter Brown. ‘At one point I thought he was really going to hit Paul, but he managed to calm himself down.’ One unconfirmed report of this meeting had Lennon leaping towards Linda McCartney, his fists raised in her face. (pg. 79)
These are the only two texts I could find specifying the report that John had made an attempt at physically assaulting Linda. Unfortunately, neither writer cites a source for the unconfirmed report, and Ive been unable to locate the claims origins—so I cant tell you how reliable its author is.
To the extent of my knowledge, no one else present during the occurrence has spoken about the alleged incident either—however, Peter Brown makes note that he believes John came close to physically attacking Paul, although in his original text The Love You Make he doesn't write anything on this:
“You bastard!” John spit. “You’ve been buying up shares behind our backs!”
Paul blushed and shrugged limply. “Oops, sorry!” he smiled.
“This is fuckin’ low!” John said. “This is the first time any of us have gone behind each other’s backs.”
Paul shrugged again. “I felt like I had some beanies and I wanted some more,” he said. (pg. 305)
So what is the likelihood of this being true, and what do I personally believe?
Honestly, I don’t know. I see it as plausible being that John has a history of physical violence, which Ive written about in more depth here. Im aware that he made conscious-efforts to change his behaviours over the years, and claimed in his 1971 interview with Peter McCabe and Robert Schonfield to have given up violence following the Bob Wooler incident in 1963—but we know from May Pang that there were still occasional incidents of physical violence. During a moment of stress, I could imagine he might have returned to old habits (and please note as well that ‘stress’ would not be a justification of this action in any way) and tried to attack Linda.
If John did make an attempt to physically attack Linda, my guess as to why Paul have been able to forgive (and seemingly forget) about the incident, is because it would have remained a hypothetical. It never really happened, so I feel like it would have been relatively easy for him to brush it off, because there were no actual consequences (or at least, no physical harm towards Linda caused).
However, I can also see that theres reasons not to believe the story. Both McNab and Doggett write of an ‘unconfirmed’ or ‘unverified’ report, meaning we have no idea who made this claim. As far as we know, the original claimant might not have even been in the room; it could be complete bollocks.
And although I wouldn’t really be surprised if Paul and even the Eastmans had chosen not to make a big deal out of the incident, Id be surprised if no one else present mentioned it—especially Peter Brown, given that he thought John came close to attacking Paul.
However, to counter that last point, another theory I have is that if Paul had been standing close to Linda at the time, perhaps it wouldn’t have been clear based on Johns erratic behaviour who he was aiming for—so while some people might have believed John was attempting to attack Linda, others might have thought he was aiming for Paul.
So in short—and I apologise about the very dissatisfactory response—my opinion on this really is just an ‘I Don’t Know’ one. It could go either way imo. It would be easier to discern an answer I think if we had access to the original report, but as far as Im aware, that hasn’t been released.
Sources:
Northern Songs breakdown (x) — @thecoleopterawithana
Dick James sells his Northern Songs shares to ATV (x)
The Beatles and ATV fight for the control of Northern Songs (x)
You Never Give Me Your Money — Peter Doggett
And In The End: the last days of The Beatles — Ken McNab
The Making Of John Lennon — Frances Kenny
The Love You Make: an insiders story of The Beatles — Peter Brown & Steve Gaines
For The Record — Peter McCabe & Robert Schonfield
"I never knew what he wanted in a woman because I never knew what I wanted" I think this quote is so telling but I haven't seen much commentary on it. Do you have any particular thoughts? It seems to put John in a very sad light. And to me it's one of his most revealingly repressed-gay quotes, but maybe there's another way to interpret & I'm overstepping.
Hello there, dear anon!
I hope you’re still around to see this! As usual, I’ve taken an appalling amount of time answering this thought-provoking ask. However, in this instance, that “appalling amount of time” is probably over a year; a new record for me. Wherever you are now, I hope you are well, and if my ramblings don’t reach you, may they interest others.
I also have to admit that at the time I received this ask, I was most likely not equipped to understand all the layers of meaning in this sentence. And it’d be quite presumptuous of me to assume that I am completely prepared now. But let’s just hope that my ability to perceive their nuances has grown since then, and will continue to do so in the future.
Needless to say, this is only my current interpretation, and I welcome any commentaries that will help broaden it! (And please don’t fret for a second about offering your own interpretation and somehow “overstepping”; we’re all just having a decades-spanning conversation here.)
Now, on with your question.
First, let’s integrate that sentence in its full quote:
Q: So, John. You and Paul were probably the greatest songwriting team in a generation. And you had this huge falling out. Were there always huge differences between you and Paul, or was there a time when you had a lot in common?
JOHN: Well, Paul always wanted the home life, you see. He liked it with daddy and the brother… and obviously missed his mother. […]
JOHN: So it was always the family thing, you see. If Jane [Asher] was to have a career, then that’s not going to be a cozy family, is it? All the other girls were just groupies mainly. And with Linda not only did he have a ready-made family, but she knows what he wants, obviously, and has given it to him. The complete family life. He’s in Scotland. He told me he doesn’t like English cities anymore. So that’s how it is.
Q: So you think with Linda he’s found what he wanted?
JOHN: I guess so. I guess so. I just don’t understand. I never knew what he wanted in a woman because I never knew what I wanted. I knew I wanted something intelligent or something arty. But you don’t really know what you want until you find it. So anyway, I was very surprised with Linda. I wouldn’t have been surprised if he’d married Jane (Asher) because it had been going on for a long time and they went through a whole ordinary love scene. But with Linda it was just like – boom! She was in and that was the end of it.
— John Lennon, interviewed by Peter McCabe and Robert Schonfeld, at St. Regis Hotel, New York City (5 September 1971).
So, the interviewer inquires about their differences and similarities during the relationship, probably to assess the pervasiveness of the clashes that supposedly led to the “huge falling out” in “the greatest songwriting team in a generation.”
And John answers that “Paul always wanted the home life.”
At first glance, and following the logic of what was asked, one might assume John was pointing to a difference that always existed between them. And an irreconcilable difference at that, given that it’s the first thing he points out in answer to a question that is probing for sources of conflict that might explain their falling out.
So we get a feeling that John saw Paul having a family as incompatible with Paul maintaining a partnership with him. They were mutually exclusive; thus, Paul getting a family resulted in a falling out between them.
That right there carries a lot of implications already.
Because John himself also wanted the “complete family life”:
Q: But with that much experience behind you, now, would you like to have more children?
JOHN: Yeah, I – as – as many as come, you know. If Lennon roll out, as they. [thoughtful] I like large families. The idea of it.
— John Lennon, interviewed by Brian Matthew (13 November 1965).
And we shouldn’t take his disappointment with the suburban life in Weybridge as proof that he’d given up on that fantasy. It’s all about the circumstances, in the end; who you’re sharing your dream with.
After all, Yoko herself came with a “ready-made family”: a six-year-old daughter named Kyoko, who she was fighting to get the custody of, after divorcing the father, Anthony Cox, in February 1969; by then John and Yoko would even have a baby of their own.
This would all eventually fall through, as Yoko suffered a miscarriage in late November 1968, and Cox would disappear with Kyoko in 1971. Yoko would not see her daughter again until almost three decades later.
So you could see how John could have felt resentful of the family life Paul had built. Always perfect mirror images, Paul was living the dream, while John’s turned into a nightmare.
But with John, the situation is always doubly complicated. Because if he was often envious of Paul, John was also jealous. Note that “envy is when you want what someone else has, but jealousy is when you’re worried someone’s trying to take what you have.”
So we have to go back to his first answer. We’ve established that wanting “the complete family life” was something they had in common rather than something they differed in.
But Paul wanting a family is still presented here as a reason for their falling out, or at least tangentially related. And John goes on to present his theory about how Paul’s choice in life partner was based on who could provide that for him. It wouldn’t be the career-focused Jane, or the inconsequential groupies.
And it couldn’t be John himself.
We should also note that, in answer to the second question, it is made clear that John’s previous declarations were but a retrospective interpretation of what happened. As he goes on to admit, at the time, John was surprised by Paul marrying Linda instead of Jane.
And that is how we finally get to the sentence in question:
“I never knew what he wanted in a woman because I never knew what I wanted.”
A possible first layer of meaning is what I’m guessing you meant by this being “one of his most revealingly repressed-gay quotes.”
1. The emphasis being placed on John never knowing what he wanted in a woman, and thus not being able to know what Paul would find more desirable in a wife.
He does go on to use admittedly questionable pronouns: “I knew I wanted something intelligent or something arty.” It happened in other instances in this interview:
I just realized that [Yoko] knew everything I knew, and more, probably, and it was coming out of a woman’s head. It just sort of bowled me over, you know? And it was like finding gold or something. To find somebody that you can go and get pissed with, and have exactly the same relationship as any mate in Liverpool you’d ever had, but also you could go to bed with him, and it could stroke your head when you felt tired, or sick, or depressed. It could also be Mother. And obviously, that’s what the male-female – you know, you could take those roles with each other.
— John Lennon, interviewed by Peter McCabe and Robert Schonfeld, at St. Regis Hotel, New York City (5 September 1971).
So one could see how, at this time, John was struggling to manage the differences between male and female partners. As Cynthia put it:
I think he was trying to find himself a… what he’d call a soulmate. Someone who had as mad ideas as he had. I think he felt that she had the talent… but that’s debatable. But he needed that— he didn’t need a ‘mumsie’ partner at that point. He needed a mate. And I think he actually said, at some stage, in an interview that, you know— She’s the nearest thing to a man — a mate; man — that he’s ever had in a woman.
— Cynthia Lennon, interviewed by Alex Belfield for BBC Radio (2006).
Another angle that I find curious is:
2. The parallel drawn between Linda’s knowledge of Paul’s wants (and her ability to satisfy them) versus John’s.
“[Linda] knows what he wants, obviously, and has given it to him.” / “I never knew what he wanted”
This one integrates a theme I’ve been interested in exploring recently: their epistemology of each other. Basically, assumptions of knowledge; when it works out and when it doesn’t.
1968: I wonder should I call you but I know what you would do
JOHN: Well, [‘How Do You Sleep’]’s an answer, you know? Paul, uh, personally doesn’t feel as though I insulted him or anything. ’Cause I had dinner with him last week, and he was quite happy.
— John Lennon, interviewed by Mike Douglas on The Mike Douglas Show (12 February 1972).
1973: And I know just how you feel / And I know now what I have done / And I know and I’m guilty (yes I am) / But I never could read your mind
In this specific case, he could be humbly admitting he never knew what Paul wanted. But another possible reading of the sentence is the exact opposite:
3. The assumption that they were so connected, so much like a single entity, that to know himself was to know Paul. That their wants and needs are aligned, and what John wants must be what Paul wants.
I never knew what he wanted in a woman because I never knew what I wanted.
1967: I am he / As you are he / As you are me / And we are all together
1969: I know you, you know me
The mirror image of this interpretation would be Paul’s own thought-provoking declarations:
[T]he Beatle thing is over. It has been exploded, partly by what we have done, and partly by other people. We are individuals— all different. John married Yoko, I married Linda. We didn’t marry the same girl.
— Paul McCartney, for Life Magazine (7 November 1969).
Q: Will Paul and Linda become John and Yoko?
PAUL: No, they will become Paul and Linda.
— McCartney press release (9 April 1970).
And finally, I believe another very important facet expressed in this sentence is:
4. The theme of John not knowing what he wants for himself.
I never knew what he wanted in a woman because I never knew what I wanted. […] But you don’t really know what you want until you find it.
This is a sentiment that John has expressed before.
JOHN: Weybridge won’t do at all. I’m just stopping at it […] I think of it every day — me in my Hansel and Gretel house. I’ll take my time; I’ll get my real house when I know what I want. You see there’s something else I’m going to do, something I must do — only I don’t know what it is. That’s why I go round painting and taping and drawing and writing and that, because it may be one of them. All I know is, this isn’t it for me.
— John Lennon, interviewed by Maureen Cleave for the London Evening Standard (4 March 1966).
JOHN: I think, in one way, all of us were under the slight illusion that we might— or maybe it wasn’t an illusion and maybe had we pushed harder we would have got what we wanted, but I’m not sure that anybody really knew what we wanted. We knew we didn’t like what was happening but nobody quite knew what it was that we wanted, cus we’d never had it!
This is another very fascinating avenue I’ve been wondering about.
John Lennon, the Dreamer, not actually knowing how that dream would manifest. Him having a vague romantic idea of what he wanted, but not really knowing how to practically bring it about.
[Imagine here a whole essay of John versus Paul in the studio, and their contrasting abilities to materialize the sounds they heard in their head and turn them into something that others could experience with them.]
In conclusion, these are about all the potential levels of nuance I can read in John’s statement at the moment. All of them fascinating and worth exploring. So I’m truly grateful to you for giving me the perfect opportunity to do so.
It would fill me with joy to have this conversation continued with all who feel like adding their own perspectives to it!
the ending of Now and Then is identical to the ending of Wait
I'm going to END MYSELF
“Q - Did The Beatles get on each other’s nerves a lot? They were always so closely confined in their hotel rooms?“ "No. It was surprising. They always had a suite. George and Ringo stayed together in one room, and John and Paul in the other bedroom, and a big, big room in between.”
— Gary James’ Interview With The Beatles’ Road Manager Bob Bonis
Stevie Nicks during the Mirage Tour, 1982.
Paul talking about ‘Get Back’ on the ‘Fly on the Wall’ podcast with Dana Carvey and David Spade, 12th October 2022
“So, he sent me a little clip, which really saved my life”
“I loved it, I really loved it… it was like having an old home movie of yourself, but perfect. And you know I really… I forgave myself, when I saw that”
“We’re looking at each other, and, you know, that spirit was always there, from the minute I met John to the minute the Beatles broke up, and beyond actually, you know. There was always that sort of… we’re just two guys, goofing our way through the world”
Who is the weirdest Beatle?
They all were 💖
I am a big fan of @orphanbeat's analysis. They really all were different types of weird, and I adore them for it.
Ringo is the sort of kooky uncle/grandpa that makes strange mspaint art that stirs up feelings of profound awe and fear and falls asleep in the middle of the family bbq and eats broccoli for breakfast.
George is a strange little gremlin. A gnome living in your garden. The scarecrow on the farm. The philosopher that lives in a cave to recieve visions from God but emerges every other hour for a snack.
Paul is a bizarre man. Throat kissed by an angel. Too much energy stuffed in a human form, and his seams are about to snap at any given moment. He hops onto a stage and you see those threads strain. He's not quite attached to the earth. This is his brain, but it's always in motion.
John is a weird raccoon man. A crazy cat lady. Something a grandmother would knit on a weekday morning. A trembling teacup of emotion. Take the calming painting in your therapist's office and put it inthe microwave... John is the result. He is a gangly puppet that will offer you his strings himself.
These pictures together are really good!
This is a clip from the BBC interview Idris Elba did with Paul McCartney. It was produced by Mary McCartney. I just thought these were interesting visuals to put with this song.
BLUR - "For Tomorrow" (1993) 4K Colour Version (2023)