Lets Make Like Vikings People, I’m Having A Full On Boat. Make Archaeologists Think That The Viking

reblog if you're gay, not gay, slightly gay, or if you just want to launch donald trump into a dying star

there is not a single reason to not reblog this

Aww, this was sweet! You kept them hanging though, I guess they’ll have to wait until next time to get together. I really enjoyed this snippet, thanks!

Hiya, could you do having seen you dance I know you have no feet (I’ve not got that completely right but can’t remember the exact phrasing, I know I’d be terrible with the Language, I’d say one thing inaccurately and get engulfed in an avalanche, swiftly followed by a tsunami) for Irene and Kai, please?

If I had The Language I’d probably get punished for the amount of Fuck bombs that I drop.

“Having seen you dance, I know you have no feet.” Kai said to Irene, leaning over to mutter to her, their arms linked. “Or I would ask you for a dance.”

“When did you ever see me dance?”

“Russia.” Kai said as they continued to circulate the room. “You stood on Alberich’s toes.” Irene supressed her shudder of disgust.

“Has it passed your mind that I may have done that on purpose?” She asked. “Why wouldn’t I stand on his feet when given the opportunity. Petty victories, Kai. Petty victories.” She smiled up at him, and he smiled back. “I will have you know that I am a wonderful dancer, however, you shall never find that out.”

“Please, may I have your hand for the next dance?” Irene slipped her arm out of his and took a few steps toward the bar.

“Sorry, I don’t have any feet. And I need a drink if I have to be here for much longer.” She replied before hedging her way through the groups of people, leaving Kai chuckling and shaking his head.

He caught up with her as she caught the attention of a bartender. “Whiskey, neat, please.” She asked.

“I’ll have the same.” Kai said with a nod, perching on the stool next to her. “So, this contact of yours.” Irene touched her earlobe, toying with the small scar that had been a lobe piercing.

“Our friend hasn’t arrived yet.” She shrugged and paid for their drinks. He gently bumped the rim of his glass against hers before they both took a sip. It was smooth and made their mouths burn a little bit. Irene left a faint lipstick smudge on our glass. “We shouldn’t be waiting too much longer.”

“I told you not to wear high heels.” He muttered, more to the whiskey than to her, then in brighter tones. “Well, good whiskey, women and the music isn’t half bad, I don’t mind the wait around.”

“Where are these women?” Irene said with a frown as she surveyed the room. “I haven’t been on a date for years and would not complain.” Kai looked at her before sighing.

“I was talking about you.” He said softly. “I know you are going to say no, that we shouldn’t, not that we can’t mind you. I know that it isn’t against the rules. I have checked, before you try to suggest that.”

“Kai, I don’t want to keep having this conversation, it’s tiring. It isn’t against any official rules, but it is against mine. You are my friend, let that be enough, please. For both of our sakes.” She sighed and listened to the ice in her glass. “Go and find one of the other women who’ll be happy to go- no, go home with them, not back to our house please, someone who’ll say yes, so that you don’t keep wasting your time on one hundred and one no’s.”

Kai sadly smiled. “I’d rather be rejected one hundred and one times, than get a yes from someone that I could never care for.” He got up though. “I’m going to get some fresh air, I won’t be long. Don’t move, especially if your contact makes… contact.” He cringed a little.

“Alright, stay safe.” He took his drink.

“You too.”

That really is navel-gazing, sorry but I just thought of that appalling pun!

Here's a little secret about me, I hate the word belly. You will never ever hear me say it and very very rarely see me writing it, I avoid it whenever possible

"You... Don't have a navel?" Irene said, almost frowning as her eyes glided down Kai's firm muscles, following the trail that her fingers had made as she unbuttoned his shirt.

"A what?"

"Navel? A belly button? Do... Do dragons lay eggs?"

"Of course. What did you expect?"

"I don't know!" She exclaimed. "Have you never been with a human before?" He ruffled his hair. "I thought, well, you implied, that you'd had a good many partners."

"No, I said that I was good in bed. No, there were no humans before you." He said. "And I take it that you've never been with a dragon then?"

"No, only humans... Well, there was a vampire once." She shrugged. "Never a dragon. God, that's weird."

"What's a navel?" She opened her mouth, and shut it again.

"Well it's... Well, do you know what an umbilical cord is?"

"I have vague memories from a biology class well over ten years ago." He said. "Something to do with repro... Do humans not have gen-"

"We do!" Irene interrupted. "I just assumed that your bodies would be identical to humans." There was a side note that she hoped that they were... compatible. "No, its to carry nutrients to the foetus before we are born. Everyone has one, its a small mark on our stomachs."

"Really?" Kai wrinkled her nose. Irene sighed and started on the ties of her dress. "Oh..."

"Shush." She muttered, she let the dress pool to fall at her feet before starting on the strings of her corset. "Men have it so easier with fashion." She said, not unkindly but with a sharp edge.

"I'm more than happy to help." He smirked as Irene managed to get the knot undone and parted the boned fabric at her chest. "Heaven and earth, how many times have you been stabbed?"

"Not that many times? Maybe four or five times?" She said, looking down.

"That one is awful." He said, putting his index finger on her navel.

"That's my navel." She said. "I guess it's technically a scar?"

"But you said it was so you could eat as a baby."

"No, it- have you ever studied human biology? And- oh you- you're messing with me, aren't you?" He grinned and nodded.

"I'll admit that I have never seen one in real life and was unaware that it does in fact look like a scar." He said. "But I'm not that dim."

"You are the worst."

"Yeah, but you like me anyway." He said, stroking her jaw. "It looks weird though."

"Says the man without a navel."

"Technically, not a man."

happy coming out day i hope none of you ever, for a second, assumed that i am heterosexual

Yeah, that line is great and really encapsulates them. Yeah it was a bit angsty and I’m like you idiots! What are you doing?! Just kiss!!! *smushes faces together*.

Hiya, could you do having seen you dance I know you have no feet (I’ve not got that completely right but can’t remember the exact phrasing, I know I’d be terrible with the Language, I’d say one thing inaccurately and get engulfed in an avalanche, swiftly followed by a tsunami) for Irene and Kai, please?

If I had The Language I’d probably get punished for the amount of Fuck bombs that I drop.

“Having seen you dance, I know you have no feet.” Kai said to Irene, leaning over to mutter to her, their arms linked. “Or I would ask you for a dance.”

“When did you ever see me dance?”

“Russia.” Kai said as they continued to circulate the room. “You stood on Alberich’s toes.” Irene supressed her shudder of disgust.

“Has it passed your mind that I may have done that on purpose?” She asked. “Why wouldn’t I stand on his feet when given the opportunity. Petty victories, Kai. Petty victories.” She smiled up at him, and he smiled back. “I will have you know that I am a wonderful dancer, however, you shall never find that out.”

“Please, may I have your hand for the next dance?” Irene slipped her arm out of his and took a few steps toward the bar.

“Sorry, I don’t have any feet. And I need a drink if I have to be here for much longer.” She replied before hedging her way through the groups of people, leaving Kai chuckling and shaking his head.

He caught up with her as she caught the attention of a bartender. “Whiskey, neat, please.” She asked.

“I’ll have the same.” Kai said with a nod, perching on the stool next to her. “So, this contact of yours.” Irene touched her earlobe, toying with the small scar that had been a lobe piercing.

“Our friend hasn’t arrived yet.” She shrugged and paid for their drinks. He gently bumped the rim of his glass against hers before they both took a sip. It was smooth and made their mouths burn a little bit. Irene left a faint lipstick smudge on our glass. “We shouldn’t be waiting too much longer.”

“I told you not to wear high heels.” He muttered, more to the whiskey than to her, then in brighter tones. “Well, good whiskey, women and the music isn’t half bad, I don’t mind the wait around.”

“Where are these women?” Irene said with a frown as she surveyed the room. “I haven’t been on a date for years and would not complain.” Kai looked at her before sighing.

“I was talking about you.” He said softly. “I know you are going to say no, that we shouldn’t, not that we can’t mind you. I know that it isn’t against the rules. I have checked, before you try to suggest that.”

“Kai, I don’t want to keep having this conversation, it’s tiring. It isn’t against any official rules, but it is against mine. You are my friend, let that be enough, please. For both of our sakes.” She sighed and listened to the ice in her glass. “Go and find one of the other women who’ll be happy to go- no, go home with them, not back to our house please, someone who’ll say yes, so that you don’t keep wasting your time on one hundred and one no’s.”

Kai sadly smiled. “I’d rather be rejected one hundred and one times, than get a yes from someone that I could never care for.” He got up though. “I’m going to get some fresh air, I won’t be long. Don’t move, especially if your contact makes… contact.” He cringed a little.

“Alright, stay safe.” He took his drink.

“You too.”

anyway here’s your reminder that lgbt muslims exist and islamophobia shouldnt be tolerated within lgbt communities!

shout out to lgbt muslims living in places where our identities are still criminalised. 

Lmao relatable.

i love how people who are into british aisles folklore vs. people who are into the modern edgy faerie movement sound like cat people vs. dog people like

me: *mentions faeries* someone reblogging my post: um even THINKING about faeries, ESPECIALLY IRISH FAERIES, is to flirt with a fate worse than death. your blood will drip form their sharp teeth. their sharp, sharp, pointy, sharp teeth. this isn’t tinker bell you’re dealing with. me: ….ANYWAY, this is my brounie his name is ferd and he unclogs my shower drain

Hat 6 or 9 broom 16

I’m hat 5, broom 5. What about you? 🦇🖤🍂

When Vale is the responsible one, you know you’ve got to worry!

Vale: We're not gonna burn it

Irene: C'mon dude, you never let me burn anything