Cast Your Fate To The Wind

Just between you and me

colored pencil watercolor and pen

Monrovia, CA, 1995

In 1995 I was living in Monrovia, CA, and, on the advice of a judge, I stopped drinking alcohol.

Not being drunk all the time came as a shock to me. I suddenly had all this time to kill. I decided to work on large, time cosuming projects. The drawing above was my first. It took a couple of weeks to complete. And then I did another.

I drew. I drew in the middle of a life completely shattered. I drew, and I dreamed of a future. A future far away where I could be new.

Years later, in 2011, when I first landed in the Philippines, the first thing I noticed was the smell. Manila smells like an overwhelming mixture of cooked pork, motorcycle exhaust and BO.

As I walked down the tarmac I was still in Monrovia and I was still dreaming.

Calbayog City, Philippines, 2025

Akae Beka - Rebellion Running

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Beautiful thing

Black sharpie on beige paper

Rosemead 2012

This drawing came out of nowhere. Like a mystical gift, one day it just happened.

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Message to Michael - Dionne Warwick

Just because I love this song.

We're going on a road trip today. Up to the north coast of the Island. We'll pack the van with my kids and ten or so cousins. And lots of food. And have fun 🤣

Let me tell you about blue...

The Pacific ocean is so beautiful.

black sharpie on paper

Miami 2009

I lived in Miami for a few years. I rented a small apartment right on the bay. It was lovely. Land crabs and iguanas used to wander around the yard. Beat that!

Miami has some of the most beautiful beaches on earth. White sands and tropical blue water. I used to hang out at beach cafes and draw.

Back then my main drawing tool was the black ultrafine sharpie. I was into drawing quilts. Crisp black and while images drawn off the cuff.

Here's another one.

Hermanos Gutierrez - Hijos del sol

black sharpie on manila paper

Miami 2010

Bay Harbor beach, Miami, 2009

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Youth and innocence

pencil drawing

Culver City 1977

This is an old one. 1977.

I can still remember drawing it. I was living at the time, with someone special, in an apartment in Culver City, with a big double bed. When she came home that night she loved it.

I stlll have this drawing tucked away in one of my drawers.

And I still have my memories tucked away in my mind.

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Peyote memories

ballpoint pen and alcohol

Calbayog City 2024

I think the only mind altering substance that I truly miss from my misspent youth is peyote.

Way back then, back before life's crushing journey had forced responsibility upon me, I found that next to the emotion of love, the mental state produced by consuming the peyote cactus was perhaps the most wonderful thing this side of paradise.

We, my friends and I, used to blend the peyote buttons in V8 juice.

We called it V9 juice.

"Watch out for that 9th vegetable," we would say.

And crack up.

Totally unrelated but here are a couple drawings I did this morning..

I don't know why but they got me thinking about psychedelics.

Peyote memories

ballpoint pen and alcohol

Calbayog City 2024

And yes, they do look similar. That's because I drew one of the drawings on the backside of the other drawing.

Why not? 🤣

Peyote buttons

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"Space is where you let go, not where you hold on" - Alan Watts

Yesterday, Sean, my 8 yo son, asked me:

"Dad, what's more believable, a jellyfish or a unicorn?"

I love it when he asks me things like that.

Space time and jellyfish

Pen drawing

Chicago 2004

Where do we go from here? 2024

New Years 2024 and I'm sorry folks but how on earth did we wake up in this story line. Smh.

Pencil drawing in my notebook.

Calbayog 2024

America - Ray Charles

Oh beautiful for heros proved,

in liberating strife.

Who more than self their country loved,

and mercy more than life.

America,

America,

May God thy gold refine.

Til all success be nobleness

And every gain devine.

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Orange skies - Arthur Lee and Love

4B pencil on paper

Calbalog City 2024

Sometimes, there is a moment when the drawing comes alive..

Like magic. Like life itself. Fragile magic.

Sometimes just one more line and the drawing dies.