I Used To Write

I Used to Write

I used to write. I used to have paper and pens and pencils and crayons and markers stuffing my purse to bursting, and I used to USE them. My purse would be full of character ideas and dialogue and descriptions of lights and sounds and emotion. There were words in everything I did, my mind narrating my every action as if I were in a parallel fantasy world.

And now my purse is full of pens that don’t work, pencils with no lead, and half-filled papers with faded words that will never know their fate. My mind only speaks my fears. I feel nothing but regret and longing for a time where I could feel more. I used to write.

More Posts from Parketmansion and Others

3 years ago

The song “When There Was Me and You” from High School Musical, but make it Renga. Someone please do that.


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3 years ago

My dude just brought a bag of sausages to work for lunch. Not even in their regular packaging, just a large ziplock bag of sausages.

What a legend.


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2 years ago

Sometimes I want to text my friends happy things, but then I wonder if they’re feeling like being happy, and maybe they’re actually having a bad day and I shouldn’t be happy while they’re sad, so sometimes I don’t text my friends at all.


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2 years ago

Music is powerful because it hurts. It actually, very physically hurts. It feels like a thick balloon is inflating behind your chest and it's spreading to your stomach and arms and fingers and you want to curl into yourself as if that will stop it from growing but it continues on. The nostalgia will only ever be nostalgia. The weekly visits with a friend are now barely even a text every few months. The fandom you dedicated your life to is barely even a passing thought anymore. The ideas that ran through your head now gather dust as a forgotten word document. Life is better, sure, but life used to have them. Why couldn't life be better and still keep them?

This would have never happened if you hadn’t listened to that music. But oh how beautiful those memories are, and there's a smile on your face despite the balloon threatening to pop if you listen a moment longer.


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1 year ago

There should be a lock button on photo apps so that when I show my conservative parents a picture, they can't accidentally swipe to see all the gay fanart right next to it.


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3 years ago

one of the problems with having long hair is that when you wake up your hair will be scratching at your neck so you go to move your hair only to find that it’s actually coming from the other side of your head but there is a momentary panic of “where did this hair come from it’s not connected to anything” but no it’s just from the other side it’s fine, chill


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1 year ago

I could never be a main character because I'm sensitive and insecure and depressed and I have anxiety and I would simply die after hearing anything mean directed at me even three times.


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2 years ago

The surgery for wisdom teeth removal was super fun, but the ache afterwards is not.

I miss food.


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3 years ago

currently creating an AMV in my head about characters that will probably never actually be part of the stories I’m writing and therefore wouldn’t have any visuals that I could actually make an AMV out of


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parketmansion - We're All Trying, So Let's Be Kind, Okay?
We're All Trying, So Let's Be Kind, Okay?

Too much girly (lesbian). Too much whimsy (autism). The world is not capable of holding me. Unfortchy, I'm here anyways lmao off, deal with it.

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