I Didn't Have "i'm Broken" Teenage Asexual Angst I Had "i'm Literally Being The Only Reasonable One About

I have been thinking a lot about the entire Coop-Barb-Janey subplot, not only from a viewer's perspective but also a writer's perspective and here's some thoughts of what we might expect in S2 and/or S3:

☢️ Similarly to S1, S2 could open with a scene set in 2077 showing Coop separating from Janey. It'd be safe to assume that at one point Barb swooped in and took Janey with her to one of the good vaults.

Henry/Hank, being Barb's assistant, might have been directly involved. It would explain why Coop later thinks he might know where both of them are

Coop probably doesn't know that for a simple reason: contrarily to the experiment vaults, the location of the high management vaults must be top secret and the entrance must be well disguised and well protected

Side note: Barb and Janey are definitely not in vault 31. They are not listed on the terminal that Norm checks in one of the scenes

☢️ I think that throughout the season/s we'll get some flashbacks of Coop and Barb from the moment he found out about the bombs all the way to their divorce

I theorize Barb was the one to file for divorce, and one of the reasons was she feared his association with "commies" would lose her (and by extension her daughter) the spot in a good vault

I saw an affair angle being mentioned. I'd say it's not out of the realm of possibility. Still, if there was a third man, it would not be Hank but some high ranking executive, someone who could grant Barb that spot in a good vault.

If there was an affair and it was mostly calculated, I think there could still have been an element of genuine attraction there. The way in which Barb accuses Coop of being an ingenue, makes me think she'd be inclined to develop an attachment to someone who is the opposite of that, someone who'd make her feel safe and supported

Side note 1: the affair angle would tie nicely with the fact that Coop appears to think of his family as having been taken from him

Side note 2: ghoulcy shippers might find it interesting that the side of Coop's character that Barb seemed to resent, is the one Lucy would probably appreciate the most

☢️ All that said, Coop will most certainly find Barb and Janey at the end of S2 or at least will find out where they are and will only literally find them at the end of S3. @earthgenre made an interesting post exploring what might have happened to them. I personally am convinced they were cryo-frozen and one of the following will turn out to be true:

They were awakened, lived and died a long time ago (or were just never frozen in the first place) and Coop will have to deal with the fact that they are just... gone.

They were awakened some time earlier but by now Barb is dead and Janey is all grown up, perhaps with a husband and child/ren, or alternatively she's already old. It could make for a heartfelt reunion but in the end, the two would have to go their separate ways.

They are both still in their cryopods. Coop gets to see his wife and daughter again and is faced with a choice to either awaken them or let them sleep. It would be a test of character for him. If this one came true, I think he'd either let them sleep or awaken them just for a moment of closure and then let them go back to sleep again in wait for a better tomorrow.

You may have noticed I didn't include any scenario in which they reconcile and walk together into the sunset. This is simply because I don't think it's really an option. I mean, could you imagine Barb, the clean-cut corporate exec, traveling across the wasteland with her ex who now is also a radioactive flesh-eating ghoul? And dragging their little daughter along with them?

On the other hand, Coop wouldn't subject them to that. Yes, he's been looking for them all this time but it would be very silly of him to expect them to reunite and just go live happily ever after. And he's a lot of things but silly is not one of them. I don't think he wants to get them back. He just wants to know what the hell happened to them. Closure is what he wants and what he'll probably eventually get.

As much as I'd love to see Coop get back what he'd lost, I recognize that it wouldn't make much sense, narratively speaking. Cooper's journey appears to be about two things: regaining his lost humanity and letting go of the past. He cannot turn back into a human but he can become a better man (ghoul?) with strong(er) morals. Similarly, he cannot get his family back, not really, not even if he finds them alive, but he can always get himself a companion - someone whom he could cherish and protect, someone whom he could literally live for - and the narrative so far seems to imply that companion is meant to be Lucy. I won't elaborate further on that because there's already a gazillion posts quoting various parallels and foreshadowing elements than seem to be pointing somewhere in that direction.

At the end of it, I just wanna say, there is no way back, but there is always a way forward and that, I think, is the lesson Cooper is supposed to learn.

Same here. It wasn't enough that she intentionally got pregnant, abandoned the Nexus and the people who needed her expertise, stole dwindling resources from a group who were facing hostile forces, she had also doomed her kid to a future that had no pleasant end in sight until Ryder started making major steps in turning the odds around.

And she had the. Gall. To be patronizingly smug with no remorse for what she did.

The game even acknowledged she's prone towards selfish actions but instead of giving the player and Ryder a chance to be furious with her for it, we're forced into a position and dialogue where we're supposed to admire her for it when she gives birth.

And the game does not let you refuse this quest. You will see it every time you go to the map or your journal.

This mission makes me so mad I've never finished it. I cannot stand talking to Zoe or Addison about it and there are no consequences to make me want to save this selfish woman from her actions despite me having a completionist streak for even the most innocuous side missions.

On a side note, has anyone else noticed that every single pregnant character in Mass Effect is written to be as obnoxious as possible?! Rebekah being willing to take a larger risk with her baby, Brynn rubbing the fact that she went after Jacob in Shepard's face if Shepard romanced him and that he's better off with her WHILE SHEPARD IS RESCUING THEM, what is up with Bioware doing that?! It's as weird as their tendency to write every one of Femshep's male LIs needing to talk about their exes before she can romance them.

CONFESSION:

For the most part, I enjoyed Andromeda despite the problems/flaws but there was a couple of quests that infuriated me, with one being "The Little Things that Matter". I thought Dr Kennedy was freaking selfish. I wanted to call her out and Addision out for kissing her friend's ass. If I ever do another playthrough, that will be quest I won't do.

Which one of the companions makes you feel the SAFEST? (You, not your OC! For the sake of this question, you and this companion don't know each other well and are trapped alone together for a week. You don't get into any battles but you must share space, sleeping quarters, and food)

Safe being defined as Physically, mentally, AND emotionally

Please share this for a larger sample size!

Unless you're diabetic

‘bread is bad for you’ ‘rice is bad for you’ sorry im not subscribing to the idea that staple grains that have been integral to cultures for centuries are evil. i love you carbs

I really do like headcanoning that a shakarian romance would have a great impact on turian-human relations throughout the galaxy (especially if we pretend that SPOILER Shepard somehow doesn't die).

Because Shepard definitely is a public figure, especially by the time ME3 rolls around and Garrus is calling Shepard his girlfriend left and right. But the first contact war only happened 26 years before ME1 so tensions are obviously still fresh between their two species. But also, as media has always shown us, a romance is always more sexy and compelling than a peace treaty.

So maybe Shepard and Garrus accidentally actually make relations between their two species really really good. Like repairing decades old wounds good. The two militaries start doing more joint trainings together because of the proof of how good Shepard's team is. More ships like the Normandy are built. Turian-human romantic relationships gradually become less and less of a taboo with them being the poster children for it.

And maybe they never say anything officially but various sources have overheard Garrus Vakarian refer to himself as Shepard's boyfriend and in both political and casual settings Commander Shepard is rarely seen without her right hand turian attached to her hip.

And as much as they both claim to want to retire post-war, the workaholics in them keep them active in their military and politics. So the cameras are still on them constantly, but since they're respected war heroes, the major news networks feel like speaking on their personal lives and asking questions would be inappropriate. And yet, the talking points Garrus and Shepard choose are often about how they are campaigning for more inter-species adoption and how cross-species colonies are vital to the galaxy's rebuilding efforts right now. And Garrus is often seen taking calls from Earth and Shepard from Palaven. So their legacy and mystery continues, and both turians and humans seen their friendship or romance as a pillar in their diplomacy efforts.

It's one thing to dislike Halsin, but don't flipping try to justify a rape threat from Minthara while accusing Halsin of something he NEVER does.

Halsin: I understand, and I still cherish our relationship

Minthara: I already know your mind. I will know your body, one way or another.

Fans wouldn't like it if people kept lying and misrepresenting their favorite. Why do Halsin fans have to listen to these lies?!

I'm not ok with anyone saying this sort of thing regardless of gender. And Minthara may be a drow, but she's on the surface, where, you know, consent matters?!

Halsin is many times creepier than Minthara. Minthara atleast has the courtesy to let you know you have no choice. It's an act of domination not sexuality. Halsin instead pretends like he would be alright with not taking his violent sexual urges on you

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Touching on Gale, Wyll, and Halsin's traumas being a bit undermined in parts of the fandom

So one thing I notice on Twitter is how some people act about the bg3 characters whose abuses were perpetuated by women.

Gale specifically for this reason (but I will touch on others)bbecause I see him dismissed super often as "can't get over his ex".

But Gale's case obviously be has the line of Mystra being like "she was my muse, my teacher, and then my lover" and sure to some that's a red flag in itself (when it comes to adults I don't really give a fuck about teacher/student) but if you view it from not only Gale's own words "ive been connected with the weave for as long as i can remember"

And that doesn't distract from his genuine love of magic of course. And it also doesn't mean that he's actually been in connection with mystra for an amount of time.

However, if you ascend Gale, and he becomes a god, you get a bunch of new little things. Tara reminiscing of course, but you get a letter from Elminster, detailing that Mystra had Elminster scope out Gale when he was eight!

And sure is that pretty cool that he's a prodigy that got the attention of the goddess of magic at that age? Yes. Mystra is, however, known in forgotten Realms lore to seek young young boys who are in tune with magic to make into her chosen. And from context clues, her chosen can be anything from Elminster and Volo, dedicated wizards who try to keep things in check, etc etc. or they're somewhat of playthings to her.

Minsc also has a conversation where me mentions that weave-touched boys in his homeland were hidden away to hone their craft, then suspecting that it was because of Mystra, given Gale's case.

Gale always seems so proud that he got to bed a goddess, and on the surface, hell yeah, that's cool.

Gale continued to have her attention even as he went to Blackstaff Academy, and Mystra eventually did take him on as an apprentice directly to her, later making him her chosen, and sleeping with him.

The reason it bothers me that people dismiss all of Gale's stuff to just "he can't get over his ex" is because that's is like almost textbook grooming? She was in his life from a young age, shaping and moulding him up as he grew up to be her perfect chosen, rewarding him by sleeping with him, and so on. And then of course casting him away when he has his folly with the netherese orb (and to be fair, it very well could have looked like to her that he was trying to seize the power himself and yes the orb does siphon off weave. That is a problem for the mistress of the weave yes).

But she also tells gale to KILL HIMSELF for her forgiveness.

Gale is much more than "unable to be over his ex" this woman was in his life since he was a kid. She's almost all he has ever known. If course it's going to be difficult for him to 1. Say no to her. 2. Get over the fact that he's lost someone that he spent his literal entire life dedicated to. Honestly if asked, I don't even think Gale would acknowledge or really see that what he went through was, in fact, abuse until it was spelled out in front of him. (Which does happen somewhat with the player character pleading to him that killing himself for mystra's forgiveness is actually horrific and that he should in fact be angry for how he was treated)

Similarly, and this one has been discussed a lot, Wyll and Mizora. Wyll was 17 and actively trying to help his people. 17, in a vulnerable state, willing to do anything to help and prove himself. Mizora very clearly took advantage of him, and regards him as a "pet", refers to him being "leashed", and so on. Personally, I do dislike the sexualization of their relationship, because it very much is also grooming (although a different type. Rather than manipulating and shaping his life from the ground up, she takes advantage of a vulnerable and desperate state to manipulate and contract Wyll into doing her bidding. I won't go too deep I to this one because it has been discussed to hell and back. But I did wanna touch on Wyll's situation as well.

Also, Halsin as well, though that has also been discussed in many retrospectives by a very good friend of mine. Halsin's trauma often get dismissed due to his polyamory, open sexual nature, and his own somewhat diminishing/dismissal of it, which honestly I love the representation of, cause for a while I did that with my own trauma. Halsin was a sex slave to a house of Lolth-Sworn drow, a matriarchal society, where the men are generally used as fodder or for breeding, though male Lolth-Sworn drow can be wizards and rise in the ranks if wizardry, but are limited everywhere else. (Minthara mentions that the third male, and every subsequent male child after third are killed for being"useless"). Halsin often referred to them as "hosts" rather than being captors, (though he does touch on that if the Player Character threatens to sell him back into slavery). Again, everything I'd have to say here for Halsin has entirely been discussed top to bottom by a friend, their link is below!!

Anyway, long story short, I dislike it a lot when Gale, Wyll, and Halsin's traumas and abuses get diminished, even if/when the character themself doesn't see or acknowledge the abuse in the same lens that we, the players, do.

The Ghoul will give it to him; that poor sod Cooper Howard was right about one thing, at least. Quittin' showbiz and movin' to a ranch to raise Janey in the fresh air was just about the best idea he ever had. He just had the wrong woman at his side for it at the time.