Zahra Studied Them Briefly, Eyes Intense As She Scanned Them From Head To Toe As If Trying To Come To

"Not all of them, no. I guess I bit off more than I could chew. Thought I would save myself a few library trips, you know. Didn't really think what would happen when I had to return all of them." She had always been bit of a book hoarder, most comfortable when she knew the information she might need was within arm's reach, but she had previously also been able to take pride in being a fast, motivated reader with the ability to get lost in text even if she wasn't particularly interested in the subject. She had tried to get back to that routine, often re-reading books or research papers she had already deemed fascinating in one way or another, but the results had been less than satisfactory. She knew talking about it with someone might ease the shame, but unfortuntaly Zahra had never great at that. Still, she appreciated this little chat with Julia, especially since it allowed her to gush about her beloved cat. "I have to admit if I already got a cat stroller for her but I am still trying to figure out if I'm confident enough to take it out for a spin. Might garner some weird looks."

Her head tilted to the side as Julia explained what she was looking for. "Oh? I see. I'm not doing anything at the moment if you need help finding some books," she offered, hopeful to pass a few minutes with a clear goal in mind. "It sounds interesting. I'm sure you'll do great."

“You didn’t read them?” Julia had a surprised look on her face but she really shouldn’t be because that was the pot very much calling the kettle black. The amount of books she’d borrowed from libraries in the past but not even opened was numerous, and it wasn’t because she didn’t have good intentions when she got them. Simply that life tended to get in the way, especially if they were fiction books rather than something attributed to medicine or something she was specifically working on. Sensing the uncertainty coming from her she nodded in agreement instead of prying further, giving the other a small smile. “I’m sure - I head that is quite common among writers.” She doubted parroting that would be of any reassurance but it happened anyway. “Would you look at that, I think we’ve decided what your next purchase is going to be. Some call it a grocery bag, you call it a Circe bag. It’s flexible for ones needs.” 

A shrug of her shoulders in regards to what she was specifically looking for, pressing her lips together silently for a second. “There is a case I’m working on at the moment is a child with Adrenoleukodystrophy, it’s not something I’ve personally worked with before so although I know the facts from medical school I wanted to come and do some more reading on it incase there is anything I’ve missed. Are you staying a while?” She asked, referring to the library. @ofzahras

A sigh of relief. She wouldn't have dared to ask for help and was still eager to object, but there really was no way she would have managed on her own. Not when she was already beyond exhausted.

"Yes, attempt. Didn't get very far," she admitted, despondent. "Work stuff. I happened to be a bit overambitious when I checked them out." It was clearly and understatement and not something Zahra was particularly proud of. In the past she would have been able to make a considerable dent on her reading material, but lately the overdue fees and looming deadlines had not bee able to motivate her to work. "Thank you. I'm not sure how I got this far."

Henry was just heading into the library to try and do some research when he saw the younger woman practically lugging a huge tote bag into the building. Without thinking, he gently nudged her aside ever so slightly before picking it up with ease. "I saw you were having some trouble, so... I guess today's your lucky day, eh? Hopefully you're cool with me bringing it in for you." He chuckled as he grabbed the handle of the library door with ease, holding it open for the other. "Mercy... How does someone attempt to even read this much?"

While she had never been great at accepting help, Zahra was grateful she had run into Julia, and even more grateful she seemed to be more than willing to offer a helping hand. "Thank you," she sighed, still catching her breath.

Zahra pulled an amused face at Julia's suggestion. "That's not a terrible idea. Although I hope I won't have to do this sort of a walk of shame anytime soon." Yes, she could have made multiple trips to the library, but somehow that had sounded even more laborious before she had actually started her perilous journey. Now she wholeheartedly regretted making said decision. "But I will definitely keep that in mind if I do end up in a similar situation." Glancing at Julia, she managed a brief yet knowing smile. "I see you're leaving empty-handed."

Julia didn’t know Zahra well - they were both in the library together on multiple occasions seemingly browsing or reading the same section, meaning she recognised her face as they came across each other at the door of the public library. As for judging her for this many books? That would be the pot calling the kettle black so instead she just gave her a small smile. “Wouldn’t dream of it. Here, you take one handle and I’ll take the other.” Luckily she didn’t have any books with her right now due to being on the way to pick one up, so her hands were free to attempt helping. Not that she was particulaly strong. 

“You need to invest in one of those wagons they put kids in to pull them along.” She joked lightly. @ofzahras

When the other spoke, Zahra couldn't help smiling briefly. "I get that. It's not everyday you see someone carrying forty pounds of books in an Ikea bag. Not even in New York city." She had definitely garnered a few odd looks on her journey to the library, but most New Yorkers seemed to have seen far stranger things and didn't seem to be bothered by the sight.

"I guess you could say that." She regarded the books for a moment as if trying to come up with an excuse for dragging them around the city. "I guess I went a little overboard during my last few library trips. Toting around this haul made me really consider switching to e-books," she admitted, slightly amazed the bag had managed to stay in one piece. "They would probably be far less damaging to my back."

stuck on how to finish the small project she'd started a week earlier, jazzy finally had to admit defeat and do the research on how to best turn her idea into a reality. looking up tutorials online hardly helped because it was too easy to get distracted and go down the cute-kitty rabbit hole, so she typically stuck to how-to craft books.

so informative and full of so many other ideas for potential projects, a trip to the library wasn't really as big of a deal as jazmine was making it out to be. it just made her feel like school was back in session, so when she noticed the woman's large bag, she welcomed the opportunity to postpone her entrance. "sorry," she smiled, "but i have to ask, i do." she peered into the big blue bag, the comical amount of books too amusing a sight to keep her grin from widening. "what's happening here? are you training for some sort of reading marathon?"

She should have expected it, and in a way she had done. Still, she hadn't exactly prepared, too engrossed in her work or at least in avoiding it to the best of her ability. She had planned a relatively easy day for herself, a few hours in the archives going through the records for the Center for Religion and Media, something she could certainly find some joy in even on the worst of her days. Apparently the universe had other ideas and Zahra's simple day took a turn just as she was reaching the steps of the archives. She stopped, took a look around as if trying to figure out where the voice was coming from even though she had absolutely no doubts. At least it bought her some time. "Azhar," she replied, involuntarily amused by the anagram of their names once again. She was sure her voice shook ever so slightly but hoped it would simply seem like a sign of being out of breath. "It's me. I'm, uh, just heading in."

closed starter for @ofzahras , on campus at new york university near the library / archives.

sighing,  azhar  ran  a  hand  across  his  head  before  adjusting  his  beanie.  although  the  autumnal  weather  had  yet  to  hit  the  streets,  and  the  leaves  were  not  changing  except  for  slight  yellow  and  orange  tints  at  their  edges,  he  was  prepared  for  the  brisk  wind  that  promised  a  temperature  drop.  deep  in  thought  about  that  thesis  he  had  begun  reading,  having  been  asked  to  proofread  it  by  one  of  his  students  for  their  presentation  upcoming,  and  his  head  ached  in  the  place  that  he  couldn't  knead  out.  reminded  him  of  so  much  agony,  really.  how  he  spent  too  much  time  on  it.  or  not  enough.  but  he  didn't  want  to  be  held  down  by  his  past,  intending  on  heading  home  and  relieving  devi  of  her  watching  -  duties  earlier  than  intended  as  a  surprise.  that  was,  until  azhar  himself  was  surprised.  dressed  in  the  dark  brown  suit  jacket  and  casual  blouse  of  his  lecture  earlier,  he  paused  when  he  spotted  a  familiar  visage.  slowly  blinking.  (  am  i  seeing  things?  )  “zahra?”  too  old,  and  exhausted,  to  waste  much  time.  (  not  to  mention  his  heart  ached.  in  a  strange  way.  right  there,  in  his  throat.  )  “did  i  fall  'sleep  back  there  or  is  that  really  you?”

CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT TASK #001

a zahra hamed playlist

"I get that. I'm kind of doing the same thing," she admitted with an equally uneasy smile that disappeared within seconds. Well, she certainly stressed over work and spent an ungodly amount of time staring at her computer screen. "It'll take a while to figure out what you like doing, especially here. There's so much to do and sometimes that can be a bit overwhelming." She remembered just how spoilt for choice she had felt when she first moved to the city. Zahra had been eager to try absolutely everything to the point where she hadn't known where to start.

"Well, I mean I do like visiting the museums, or art galleries if that's your thing." She shrugged, kicking a pebble along the street as she walked. "There's tons of good live music as well. I tend to take advantage of that. Just depends on what you like."

Matt let out a chuckle at her question, shaking his head and then looking back a her with a mortified look and a shy smile. "Honestly? Work." He chuckled. "That's as far as my plans go right now. I go to work, I come home, eat, sleep. Then work again." He slipped his hands into his pockets and bit the inside of his cheek. He wasn't proud of his routine but he hasn't felt like doing much else for a few months now. Matt carried all alone a baggage way too big for his poor back.

"What do you like to do around the city for fun?" He asked, curiously, not wanting to dampen the mood, so he offered her a kind smile. "Maybe I can learn a thing or two from you."

"Yeah, that's what I was thinking. It'd be way easier than trying to trick her into her carrier and then try and carry her around. She does not like it one bit and I can't blame her." Despite her efforts, Circe despised the very sight of her carrier and would run and hide the moment Zahra pulled it out. She had of course splurged on the nicest, most comfortable one on the market but Circe did not seem to appreciate the luxury and would've most likely preferred to be carried in a food delivery bag. Her eyes grew wide as Julia described the account she had found. A delighted burst of laughter. "Really? I definitely need to check that out. Sounds like a dream, just a guy and his cat riding a bike."

Returning the books was blessedly an easy ordeal, and Zahra could at least congratulate herself on getting the haul back before any late fees had managed to materialise. She had managed to accomplish something that day and felt better for it. "Oh, I don't know. I love a good fun fact or a useless piece of information but medicine? Don't think I have the brain capacity for that." That being said, she was always eager to learn new things and could imagine far worse ways to spend an afternoon. "Lead the way."

“Oh well that makes sense, especially in New York I guess. I’m not sure how many cabs would let you in with a cat on the loose so at least with her in a pram thing you can just walk there or get the underground.” If it wasn’t raining and Julia was in that position she would one hundred percent walk so as to avoid the hell of New York’s subway. Useful, sure. Pleasant? Never. “She’d be meowing at everyone you walk past. I was on instagram the other day doomscrolling because I couldn’t sleep and this account came up about this guy who rides around with his cat in the basket of his bicycle. This fluffy white thing that just sits there and looks around - it was actually kind of adorable in a wildly impractical way.” 

Following the other towards the returns she listened as she spoke about not being tempted to pick up any medical books, understanding the concept of having different interests but the idea of walking into that section of a library without taking something home with you entirely alien to her. “I’m sure you would understand more than you give yourself credit for. I mean of course the terms are complex if you don’t know what they mean I guess - that is quite specific. Plus when they delve into more detailed specifications…” She trailed off, putting the bag of books down onto the floor once they arrived at the returns desk. @ofzahras

[cis woman and she/her] Welcome to Aurora Bay, [ZAHRA HAMED]! I couldn’t help but notice you look an awful lot like [AIYSHA HART]. You must be the [THIRTY FIVE] year old [ASSISTANT PROFESSOR OF RELIGION]. Word is you’re [RESOURCEFUL] but can also be a bit [RESTLESS] and your favorite song is [MY GIRLFRIEND IS A WITCH BY OCTOBER COUNTRY]. I also heard you’ll be staying in [OCEAN CREST APARTMENTS]. I’m sure you’ll love it!

full name: zahra hamed

date of birth: 11 july 1989

gender & pronouns: cis woman, she/her

sexuality: bisexual & biromantic

family: mother, father

pets: a black cat called circe

occupation: assistant professor of religion @ aurora bay college

place of birth: st. cloud, minnesota

time in aurora bay: around a year

height: 5′10′’

hair colour & style: dark brown, wavy, a bit past her shoulders

eye colour: dark brown

tw: infertility, mentions of religion, smoking

despite her status as somewhat of a miracle child - her parents had already come to accept they wouldn’t be able to have children of their own due to a host of fertility issues - zahra grew up knowing a lot was expected of her. both of her parents had grown up with very little and had been able to use education as their way out of difficult home situations. she doesn’t resent her parents in the slightest, but sometimes wonders what her life would now look like if she been given just a bit more space and freedom to discover and make mistakes. still, she’s grateful for the drive her parents instilled in her as it has helped her to keep going even during times of distress. that being said, she has unfortunately picked up a host of rather unhealthy coping mechanisms for said stressful situations.

while the household didn’t necessarily seem all that outwardly pious to outsiders, religion was always a big part of the family dynamic and something that was discussed often and at great length, partly due to the interfaith nature of the family. zahra was a curious child and loved getting involved in these conversations, even when the concepts seemed far too complicated for her. she loved lingering in doorways when her parents had friends over, keen on sharing her opinions and the facts she had so meticulously taught herself.

she was a bright student. however, despite doing well academically, zahra often struggled with the social aspect of high school. she was kind of an awkwardly intense, gangly teen who spoke too little or far too much and couldn’t really figure out what her crowd was for quite a while. she eventually befriended a group of girls, some of whom she’s still in contact with to this day.

zahra moved to minneapolis at the age of 18 to attend university of minnesota. she went on to receive her bachelor’s degree in religious studies before completing her master’s in philosophy.

unwilling to give up studying just yet, she decided to pursue a doctorate degree, still unsure what she actually wanted to do in the future. she was accepted to princeton and later completed her phd in philosophy and religion.

while her life hasn’t always been easy or uncomplicated, it has been rather streamline. she has struggled and put in an enormous amount of hard work to get where she is now, but things have generally gone well for her. however, she has recently gone through something of a personal crisis and is really struggling to find her feet again. to put it simply, zahra has become wildly disillusioned with the academia and is suddenly really not sure she’s entirely happy with her choices in life.

she accepted a job at aurora bay college before coming to terms with the emotional and professional conflict she was having. she enjoys her job but is certainly very conflicted and is questioning whether or not she made the right decision.

zahra is bilingual and grew up speaking arabic with her father. she’s also fluent in french, can read german fairly well and studied hebrew, ancient greek and latin during her studies. her streak on duolingo is over two years long, but she doesn’t take it all that seriously. she just really likes mobile games and this one just happens to teach her languages, making it just a little more productive than candy crush.

an avid collector of all sorts of trinkets, zahra does not vibe with the minimalist aesthetic. her bedroom is full of knickknacks and keepsakes. she also collects books and dreams of being the sort of person who actually reads the books she buys. to be fair, she does read a lot, but it’s mostly stuff related to her research or the lectures she’s planning. all the new, exciting fiction books have gone unread for years. this fact has not slowed down her buying habits, though.

can be seen chain-smoking and cursing to herself at all hours of the day. when does she sleep? does she sleep? who knows.

some super vague connection ideas!

the stress has led to a lot of sleepless nights, resulting in her becoming a real night owl. she can be spotted frequenting places that are open late, and can be found chain-smoking and scrolling endlessly on social media. she would’ve undoubtedly run into some folks with similar schedules and habits.

any people with fun, interesting hobbies. after forming some sort of a connection, she would undoubtedly pester these individuals to teach her stuff. your girl needs to be distracted from her own thoughts.

zahra enjoys noisy music. so, a person willing to accompany her to gigs around the area. she’s happiest when it’s so loud she can’t hear anything at all.

friends/acquaintances/flings from minneapolis and/or princeton. would especially love to have some of her besties from high school.

people she has dated/hooked up with during her time in aurora bay.

she would have definitely been the sort of teen who had a pen pal. so, one of those would be super duper fun!

a neighbour who is trusted to watch her cat when she's busy or out of town!