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He has reached dad joke status

Your husband, Toji, could really be the worst sometimes.

He was in the middle of helping you cut vegetables up for dinner in the kitchen, when, out of the blue, Little Megumi came scampering in. Megumi reached his dad's side, and, trying to take a look at what was going on, stood on his tippy toes and peered at the counter.

Noticing that food was being prepared, Megumi blurted out, with no humor in his voice, "Hurry up."

Originally, Toji thought about scolding Megumi on his way of talking to adults, when, he got a brilliant idea. "Why?"

"Because I'm hungry, duh."

"Hi, Hungry," Toji looked down at Megumi with a grin, "I'm Dad."

Megumi gave his dad the biggest side glance known to man, and scoffed. "Hmph, I'm serious."

"You're not Serious; you're Hungry."

Megumi rolled his eyes, annoyed at his ridiculous dad. "Are you Kidding Me?"

"No," Toji shook his head, trying to hide his laughter, "I'm Dad."

prt one

pornstar!satoru who pays for a month of your onlyfans—for research purposes. he needs to find out who this boyfriend of yours is, and figure out a way to get rid of him.

pornstar!satoru who knew it was a long shot, that you might not even show him on your page at all. and of course he got distracted a few times whilst scrolling through your posts, dick rock solid and at attention with each new angle of you of his screen.

pornstar!satoru who, when he finds the more homemade stuff, he’s pathetically jealous of the man that frequents your bed so often. how big his hands look as they lay lovingly over your skin, how in love you look as you suck his cock, how well his tip hits your g-spot over and over and—of course he fucking knows him. a video of you on your back piques his attention, your man in between your legs and lapping at your needy pussy like he’s starved. satoru knows that long hair, that cheeky sexdrunk smile that pulls at his lips while he eats you out, he knows those purple fucking eyes that turn to glance at the camera.

of course it’s pornstar!suguru.

pornstar!satoru who suddenly has his cock out, languid strokes of his fist over his length is nothing to the memories of pornstar!suguru's lips wrapped around his length. who is so enthralled by the knowledge that both him and his former co-star have gotten to feel the flutter of your pussy around their cocks.

pornstar!satoru whos fingers are frantic as he searches for more of you together, and ends up spending way too much money on subscriptions just to watch you get fucked stupid on the same cock that he once did for a film a few years back. who wonders if you feel the same stretch with suguru as you did with him. if you were forced to choose, relationships be damned, who you'd say made you cum harder.

pornstar!satoru whos dick gets impossibly harder at the thought of you not choosing at all. who lets himself picture it, you spread out for both him and pornstar!suguru, your eyes wide at the prospect of taking both of them at once. how he'd take your mouth first, how with each thrust of suguru into your pussy would push you forward onto his cock. how he'd kiss your boyfriend breathless while they're both balls-deep inside of you.

pornstar!satoru who strokes himself along to a video of you riding pornstar!suguru. who times his orgasm just right with your shared one, who goes fucking blind for a moment with the way his climax washes over him. your noises, suguru's noises, the imagined smell of sweat in the air. he moans, a dirty mixture of your name and his, something embarrassing and still he remains steadfast in his lust.

pornstar!satoru who, because he respects himself at least a little, gives himself fifteen minutes for post nut clarity to set in. and when it doesn't, he's texting his agent in the dead of night and very firmly requesting to be booked again

with both of you.

pornstar!suguru who, upon having you home from a particularly tiring shoot, is doting on you with heart-shaped pupils. He's got you laying down with him on the couch, big hands working magic on your sore muscles.

pornstar!suguru who doesn't always ask for details about your shoots. he knows it's just work, hell, he's a pornstar himself, he doesn't need the raunchy details of your jobs to keep himself from spiralling. but something about today feels different. today, you seem uncharacteristically fucked out.

pornstar!suguru who is more than surprised when you're still rearing to get fucked silly that night. you groan about your shoot with a new pornstar, and how his touch is still lingering on your mind. and suguru laughs, because jealousy doesn't come easy to him-- if anything, knowing you're still in his bed at the end of the day just gets him even more worked up.

its when pornstar!suguru bottoms out inside of you, that shared gasp of ecstasy leaving both your lips that you mention how he asked you out for drinks after the shoot. you add on, of course, that you turned him down, but the comment still has your boyfriends interest piqued.

pornstar!suguru who, with a kiss to the corner of your lips and a gentle thrust into you, asks who this admirer of yours is. and just as the names about to leave your lips, his phone chimes on the bed with an email.

an offer. a threesome shoot: him, you, and a second male. it's the best paying shoot he's gotten in a long time. he hasnt quite scrolled down to see who the other talent was, so when you snatch his phone, legs still wrapped around his waist, he catches that smile on your lips. he catches the way you clench around him.

"that's him," you speak, such pretty words from your lips as you turn the screen to show him the name and headshot of pornstar!satoru.

and pornstar!suguru's dick gets impossibly harder.

tags: @meowforluv @p1xlesk1nn @ch3rryistheg @miizuzu @okayiamkassandra

(if u asked to be tagged and ur not here i apologise i am just a girl anyways pt 3 will be a full fic thxies)

CAPTAIN AMERICA FU-

Steve

Summary: Steve’s never had a blowjob and could you really consider yourself a friend if you didn’t suck his dick?

Warnings: 18+, praise kink?, oral m!receiving, smut

“You’ve never…” your words dying down as you waved your hands for emphasis, letting the silence fill the gaps of your question.

Steve cheeks darkened under your gaze and he licked his bottom lip before answering. “Well, I’ve been busy.” His excuse seeming lame to him when they fell from his lips but it was true. Captain America and all that. He took another sip of his drink.

Keep reading

Venom isn't scary at all. He's just a bus fluff gooey slime ball that needs attention

So, I’ve found myself in a wormhole of Venom smut lately… using Morsel as a term of endearment is DOING THINGS to me. 🥴😵‍💫

this morning, you told ino that you didn't want to talk too much today, since you're tired and stressed. you thought he would take it lightly as he usually would and move on but...

it's like he hasn't spoken all day. all you said was that you weren't in a good mood, but you're convinced he's been ignoring phone calls for the sake of making as little noise as possible. really, he didn't need to go that far.

so, the only thing you can hear within the apartment was the sizzling of stir fried vegetables in the pan in front of you — one of his favourite meals. cooking for him was supposed to be a calming experience, but the feeling of eyes burning into your back was hard to ignore.

you look over your shoulder, and the first thing is him sat across the entire kitchen. not only did he misinterpret your words of wanting to be quiet, but he also managed to grasp 'keeping distance' from that entire conversation, which you did not mention once.

he's sulking, and you can tell.

you blink at him once before deciding to give in, signalling for him to come closer with a nod. ino immediately accepts the invitation, scrambling to be by your side. though he was eager, he made sure his touch was gentle, not to tight at any point, a weak hold around your waist that you could easily break out of. even with his cautious behaviour, your cheeks were still smothered in kisses, not that you minded whatsoever.

the silence was now more comfortable than anything.

If I could summon mahoraga at any given moment, I'd do it too

You wanted request, what about megumi reacting to Jealous reader ? Or maybe jealous megumi?🤪

WITH THIS TREASURE I SUMMON: MEGUMI FUSHIGURO

you and megumi are in situationship, nothing more, nothing less. but he knows how you used to have a crush on yuta okkotsu, but he doesn't know that you don't anymore. so when he sees you wearing yuta's sweater he almost summons mahoraga if you don't take off the sweater.

content warning: fluff! jealous! megumi

“i had a thought.”

“oh no.”

“i swear it's a good one this time,” he pleaded.

the short hair girl, nobara kugisaki, rolled her eyes and raised her hand to the pink-haired boy, “you want me to hammer your head, yuji?” the boy only sighs in defeat as his shoulder slumps. “you suck, kugisaki,” he howled. you let out a little laugh and shook your head slowly at the behaviour of your two classmates. the never-ending bickering of them never not amused you.

you walk to megumi, your other classmates with a plate of meat in your hands. he is standing there, grilling some meat alone. “hi,” you whisper to him and kiss his cheeks when you stand beside him. he quickly looks around afraid to find someone who's looking at what you've just done. “y/n,” he whispered in warning. you just giggle at him and give his lips a peck— not caring about the way his cheeks turn crimson red and his eyes open wide. you also don't care if anyone sees you.

“what?” you ask, giving him a quick glance. he keeps silent and continues to look at you. you rolled your eyes and let out a sigh. “i can kiss you whenever i want, nobody's watching anyway,” you tell him. you and megumi are friends, you can say that, or maybe you can't. both of you are way too romantic to be called friends but less to be called a couple— a situationship, maybe that's the right word.

when he came back after the mission, megumi never came to his room first, always looking for you and spending the night in your dorm room. holding and kissing you like his life depends on it. when in public, megumi is a private person, he doesn't talk much, he's calm and collected. he doesn't show his feelings when it's unnecessary. but when he's with you, he's like an open book and talks too much, even more than you. you could spend a whole day only listening to him talking, telling you a story about when he was little, even when first he meets gojo and is adopted by the brush-look-alike man.

and you are always grateful for that. you feel special with the way he treated you, the way his green eyes always twitch with love whenever you come to vision, the way his lips tremble with how hard he tries to hide his smile when you walk your way to him and everyone's around. you hope that was enough but of course being a human who's hungry with desire, you want your relationship with megumi to have a name— boyfriend and girlfriend.

you want him to be yours, badly. you want to have the right to be jealous when some girl is hitting on him when you go outside. it makes you feel suffocated to the point you feel like you can explode any second. you feel like you—

“y/n?”

you flutter your eyes before snapping your neck to the side to find megumi looking at you with narrowed eyes. “you alright?” he asked, worried. you cleared your throat and nodded, “yeah, sorry,” you smiled at him. he looked at you for a few seconds before nodding his head. “no problem, baby,” he softly said.

that day, you spend your evening having fun with your friends and your teachers. talking about a lot of things and laughing. thanks to your rich teacher, you can sleep peacefully and happily with a stomach full of expensive meat and expensive food you cannot afford with just student expenses alone. blessing gojo satoru's soul for having this barbeque party and feeding you and your friends. he is indeed acts like a father rather than a teacher sometimes.

time moves fast and the air gets more chilling every hour. right now you're sitting with yuta okkotsu, your senior alone, having a drink. he's a special grade curse, handsome, soft-spoken as well as soft-hearted person, that's why you used to have a crush on him. the first time you saw him was the day he fought with suguru geto. and that was instantly love at first sight. seeing how strong and cool he was fighting with the long-haired guy makes your heart beat faster than usual. and since then, everyone knows you're having a crush on him, and you're not planning to not make it obvious.

you sometimes send the boy flying kisses and laughing after seeing him become flustered and blushing. flirting with him from time to time until it becomes a habit— until you realize you're not having a crush on him anymore. you just love the way he's quickly looking away when he caught you already looking at him when he's become red like a steam crab when you hug him or playfully kiss his cheeks, you just love teasing him and making him stutter. it's adorable.

and megumi doesn't know that. he believes that your crush on the second-year special-grade sorcerer is unfaded. that's one of the reasons why he doesn't girlfriend you yet— afraid that the feelings aren't mutual and he doesn't want to get hurt. but seeing you sitting there, touching yuta's shoulder from time to time as you share a laugh at whatever you both were talking about pissed him off. “what's a good thing about him any way other than being a special grade sorcerer? he's a womanizer,” he ranted under his breath. doesn't realize yuji looking at him with his eyebrows lifted. he follows where megumi eyes stare at where you were.

“you know yourself that he's more than a special grade sorcerer, if you like y/n that much why don't you tell her?”

“yeah I know, but— what?”

surprised, megumi snapped his neck so fast that yuji was afraid he was gonna break it. his green eyes widened as he looked at the pink-haired boy. “did I say that out loud?” he asked, to which yuji responded with a nod. “why don't you tell her? I'm sure she likes you too, wait— are you jealous, fushiguro?” megumi's face became red in embarrassment and became an understatement as he looked away from his best friend. yuji snickers and grabs the boy's face by the chin— forcing him to look at you as he tightly closes his eyes. he rolls his eyes in annoyance when he finally opens his eyes and the sight of you getting too friendly with yuta meets his vision.

“no way— you're actually jealous,” he laughed.

and yuji spends the rest of the hour making fun of megumi but also giving him advice and moral support. forcing the spike-haired boy to confess his feelings to you and become girlfriend and boyfriend already. of course megumi try not to pay any mind to what sukuna's vessel rambling about, it's yuji after all. he's the worst anyone could get any advice from after gojo.

after the talk with yuji, megumi sits by himself in the garden in gojo's backyard. loss in his deep thought to realize you are already walking toward him, smiling. “fushiguro~” you sang happily and sat on his lap sideway with one arm wrapped around his neck— lips forming the biggest smile the boy has ever seen. “what do you want? go back to your yuta,” again, megumi rolls his eyes. you jut your lips as you look at him. “so mean,” you jived.

“you look upset, what's wrong?

“do you have fun talking to him? you must be, you've been spending an awful lot of time with him and wearing his sweater,” his snarky remark makes you want to kiss him to death. but right now you try to enjoy the show and play innocent. “what are you trying to say megumi?” you ask him. he looks at you for a moment while holding your hand before looking away.

“just go hang out with yuta, you've gotten good at that.”

“are you perhaps.. jealous, megumi?”

he scoffs and glances at you again before saying, “me? jealous of him? bless his delusional heart,” he sassed. you fit a giggle and cup his right cheek. his green narrowed eyes looking at you unpleasant and pouting his lips, without him realizing. “you're so cute when you're jealous,” you mumble and give him a little peck on the lips. “you know you're the only one I love,” you tell him, this time you're the one who's not realizing. and after that, for a few seconds both of you just looked at each other, too shocked to say something. “what did you just say?” megumi whispered, eyes open wide.

“what?”

you look away and get off of his lap. before you get a chance to run away megumi already grabs your hoodie— giving you no chance to run. he pulled the hoodie up lightly, forcing you to get close to him. “you love me?” he asked, this time you could see he was trying to keep his lip from smiling. you clear your throat and pull the hoodie from megumi's fist before facing him. “isn't that obvious? i— i thought you knew,” you mumble. suddenly feeling the shyness hug your body as megumi pierces his eyes at you intensely.

“what about yuta?”

“what about him? oh— I just realized I never liked him that much.” you shrugged your shoulder unbothered. “cool,” megumi whispered. he pulls you closer before locking his fingers behind your waist, hugging you. “let's do that—” you place both your hands on his chest while looking up at him. you lift your eyebrows and indicate that you don't understand what he is referring to. “that thing, boyfriend and girlfriend thing.” he smiles, his cheeks turn red, body suddenly feels hot, waiting for your answer.

you nodded, “okay.” smiling back at him.

without waiting for another second he crashed his lips to yours, locking them gently and smiling between the kisses. he pulls you closer as you wrap your arm around his neck. after a minute he pulled away and took a full fist of the hoodie that you're wearing. “take off this hoodie and use mine.” you stay silent for a moment before shaking your head and turning away. “nah,” you disagree. you heard gaps from behind you, “what do you mean nah?!” you turned around, “i'm cold, and yuta has the comfiest hoodie,” you told him.

“take off the hoodie y/n.”

“nah, what are you gonna do about it?” you put both hands on the hips and stick your tongue out to him. megumi clenched his fist and poses like his about to summon mahoraga. “with this treasure I summon—”

“the fuck— fine,” you run to him to hit his shoulder.

“you're so annoying,” you grumble and pull him to go back inside. megumi just gives you his sheepish smile and lets you drag him.

rich bf nanami who gets physically upset when you won’t accept his gifts

rich bf nanami who takes you shopping when uni becomes too stressful, and will buy you everything you so much as look at

rich bf nanami who holds your girly hand bag with all sorts of keychains while you shop, and smiles at you sososooo brightly whenever you show him something cute

rich bf nanami who makes you try on everything you got and watches, and if he really likes what you’re wearing he goes ,”spin for me, baby,” . you swear you hear him mutter ‘my god’ when you do [SCREAMS]

rich bf nanami who barely even calls you your name anymore, opting for ‘baby’, ‘angel’ and [his favorite] ‘sweetheart’

rich bf nanami who never stops telling his parents about you- so when they meet you they already know you as ‘kento’s sweet friend’

rich bf nanami who makes sure his friends know that you’re not just anyone to him, and that if they ever talk badly about you he will find out, and he will confront them

rich bf nanami who would let you paint his nails, do his hair, anything bcus he just loves you so much and sees how happy you get when you do

rich bf nanami who looks at you with such admiration that everyone around you notices

rich bf nanami who is so insanely patient with you when you cry over anything small, when you become snappy, when you’re stressed because you deserve to be taken care of

bf nanami <<3333💕💕💕💕

This is so real. I feel like he'd be scared of spiders and lizards

Toji the big buff and muscular man. The man who makes everyone turns away, scared to even look him in the eyes when you two walk the streets the together. He isn’t afraid of anything and everything is afraid of him (not you). Seriously. Nothing scares him. Believe him when he says that. Toji Fushiguro is a fearless man.

Except when it comes to one thing.

“TOOOOOOJI!” The sound of your voice urgently calling for him makes the man run up the steps two of the time, forgetting about the weapons he was organizing.

“The fuck is all this screamin’ for- what are you doing?” His eyes land on you standing on top of the bed, pointing to a corner of the room with a shoe. He starts to move where you were pointing to.

“There’s a fucking spider right there! Look- LOOOK!”

That right there causes Toji to freeze in his tracks, glancing to see the eight legged creature sitting in the corner.

“Hell no.”

“What? Toji kill that shit- before it disappears and comes back with babies.”

“You heard me the first time. Hell. No.” Toji shakes his head, pointing to the spider. “That fucker is the size of my left ballsack. I ain’t touchin’ that.”

You scoff as you turn to him, momentarily forgetting about the spider. “You’re telling me that you can kill people for a living but you can’t kill a damn spider!?!”

“It’s different.”

“How?”

“It just is. I don’t know what kind of disease or illness that thing is carrying. No thank you.”

“So you’ll get some random man’s blood on you but you won’t kill a spider for the love of your life?”

“Now you’re just making me seem like an asshole.”

“Cause you are. You got all that muscle for what? If you can’t kill a simple spider then- Toji…. Where did it go?”

His eyes follow your gaze to the now empty corner. “Oh fuck no.. nah I’m out baby.” He immediately leaves the room, leaving you alone.

“HELLO WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING!?”

“Not here I know that! This apartment belongs to the damn spider now.”

And that’s how the two of you end up staying at Shius apartment for the night whether he liked it or not.

Yes.

dumb baby

relationships: bucky barnes x fem!reader

summary: how bucky finds out you have a dumbification kink

word count: 0.5k

warnings: dom/sub elements, degradation, praise, mocking, dumbification, spanking, dirty talk

smut! minors dni

“tell me what you want baby doll.”

he watches you squirm in embarrassment on his lap. you always do when you have to talk dirty. it’s precious. when you fail to answer he grabs your face with metal fingers, making you pout. he can’t help the words that tumble out of his mouth, “come on baby, use your big girl words.”

he’s never said something like that before and watches closely for a reaction, not wanting to make you uncomfortable. he hears your heart quicken and looks down to see an actual wet patch on his boxers. he chuckles, making your face heat up. he decides to play into it. he starts massaging your ass, “if you wanna play dumb i can bend you over my knee.”

you actually whine at his words. “i want to ride you bucky. please,” you pout, looking at him with big eyes. he grins, he’ll never say no to his doll. he sighs, pretending to consider. “you can try but i don’t think you’ll be able to.” he strokes your hips, as if he’s trying to comfort you but his words are mocking, “‘m just to big for you, sugar plum. and you know how cock drunk you get.”

you frown, wanting to prove yourself. “no, i can do it bucky! please!”

he smirks at your enthusiasm, “alright doll, but don’t go stupid the second i fill you up.” you nod desperately and raise your hips, giving him room to pull down his briefs and expose his hard dick. it bobs up, rubbing against your clit. you moan at the contact, gripping onto bucky’s shoulders. he slaps your ass, making you gasp at the loud smack. “come on baby girl, you said you wanted to ride me. realizing it’s too much for ya?”

“no. i can do it,” you repeat, clumsily lining up his dick to your entrance. he watches slick literaly dripping from your pussy and clenches his jaw, holding back. for now you’re going to do all the work. you sink down, both of you groaning at the new position. you finally bottom out, sitting on his lap with a whimper. “what did i say about going stupid, pretty girl?” he threatens with a huff, rubbing your still warm ass.

you whine, lightly bouncing on his dick, the shallow thusts keeping him deep inside you. he smirks at mouth open expression, cooing mockingly, “oh poor thing. is this too much for your baby brain?” you’re too lost in your pleasure to reply, something bucky doesn’t like. he uses his cool, metal hand to pinch one of your nipples. “big girl worlds. use them.”

you grip his shoulders, babling. “it feels so good, bucky. so full.”

he smirks, “good girl. but i think you need some help, don’t you?”

you furrow your brows, about to ask him what he means, when he plants his feet on the floor and starts thrusting up into you. you squeal, falling fowards against bucky’s chest. he smirks, holding your pilant body. “there’s my cockdrunk baby. can’t even hold yourself up, can you? need me to do everything for you,” he roughly grunts in your ear.

----

a/n: my first smut drabble! thoughts?

Sketch

Reblogs and comments are appreciated