Frankly we all should have multiple names. We contain many multitudes and vibes and just one is too limiting
it's kind of a you problem if you read "this is a problem that also affects me" and assume it to mean "i only care about this problem because it affects me. i would not care if it only affected you"
i've seen this a lot more often in reference to anti-trans legislature recently. people acting as though only trans women will be affected by it and then getting mad at trans men and nonbinary people for daring to mention we're also negatively impacted by it
can we just have a community please. i want a community. can we not fight over who has it worse all the time and just give eachother support
genuinely have had numerous people tell me that as a trans man i'm "a men's rights activist invading trans spaces".
so many people legitimately do not see trans men as trans.
i need people to understand that so many people for some reason have the idea that trans = feminine or woman. it's a real issue.
how are trans men invading trans spaces? this is where we live. and of course we're gonna advocate for our own rights. why wouldn't we? we don't exist to self flagellate because the idea of transsexual and transgender manhood and masculinity frightens you. i'm a trans man. i'm trans. i'm not invading my own community.
as a community i think we should never forget that this weaselly mfer said this with his full chest
If I had a nickel for every time one of my partners had gotten labioplasty prior to our relationship because of the stigma against people with vulvas that aren't "perfect," I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it is really sad that it happened at all, much less twice.
Anyway, next time you shame a trans man or trans masc person for their genitalia looking "gross," know that you catch all of those other women and vulva-havers in the crossfire.
Fuck you <3
Oh definitely. I've found that most online bullies are much less confident when they can't hide behind a screen, but some will continue their assholery in public. I'm genuinely so sorry that happened to you, that's fucked up.
I've met people who were proudly transmeds in the "Queer Friendly" dorms I stayed in in college. Had a guy tell me I was "just confused about my gender" to my face.
I've personally had an easier time rallying support in real life. Talking to other club members one-on-one and saying "hey, so-and-so made some really transphobic comments that upset me today, did you notice that happening?" usually worked. Sometimes calling out the behavior in front of everyone helped as well; chances are other people were upset by it but too afraid to speak up.
And if all that didn't fix it? The space wasn't worth it, and it was time to find a new one.
I was a teenager when ace and transmed discourses were at their peaks, and I can’t exaggerate how badly it affected me then.
Now trans men are the latest target, and I’m terrified for trans kids.
It’s easy to say “intracommunity discourse is an online problem! Go talk to queer people irl!”, but people forget that so many kids and teenagers do not have safe or reliable access to IRL LGBT+ communities and support groups. For many, online spaces are the only option.
We need to make sure the younger members of our community are being heard, and block out the hateful voices with messages of support and encouragement. Things are bad enough for trans people right now, and it's easy to forget that trans minors are often the ones suffering the most.
The hate you are experiencing isn’t normal, it hasn’t always been like this, and it won’t always be this way. It is bleeding out from a small, miserable group of self-absorbed jerks.
Don’t feel obligated to call them out, don’t feel like you have to interact with these people. Please don’t doomscroll through discourse tags; it will make you feel like everyone is out to get you.
If you want to speak up for your community, that’s fine, but please take a break if you feel like your mental health is worsening. Block anybody who so much as breathes rudely in your direction.
You’re just as trans as the rest of us. You are welcome here.
Oh, and if you want to seek out external resources and groups, PFLAG helped me a lot when I was younger. It is an American-based organization, however, so if anyone has recommendations for those living outside of the US, please let me know in the reblogs!
Good lord. If you say a trans woman is secretly a man, you are misgendering her, which means you are being transmisogynistic.
It's not that complicated.
it's such a timeline we live in
I don't usually reblog from people who want to "debate" the existence of transandrophobia or dismiss the issues trans men face because I think it's more important to center transmasc/trans men's voices in this conversation.
But this is a reminder that if I DO engage with someone like that on here, DO NOT harass them! Also, don't try to argue with someone who's committed to seeing everything you say in the worst possible light. Just block and move on.
This isn't hate mail this is love mail but most times when I see stuff about this trans infighting the transfems are usually posed against transmascs. It's understandable as theres bad apples on both sides and im not surprised people run to protect their own, but I'm incredibly glad to see a trans feminine person advocating against this infighting and for ALL trans unity. I hate to see transmascs bully transfems even though it could be self defense, and vice versa. It feels like all huge trans bloggers both men and women have this idea that we must all hate each other so it's good to see a blog promote positivity on BOTH ends. thank you for fighting for us transmascs, and as a transmasc I need to work harder on ignoring the divisive posts and focusing on fighting for my sisters too. The world is a scary place and we need to be together more than ever before.
I love all my trans siblings and will do my best to defend every single one.
Hi! IDK if you know but the text selection colour on your blog theme is white-on-white, or at least an extremely light gray on white. IDK how familar you are with theme customisation, but if you look at the root of your theme, there should be a "::selection" block where you can change them to be more contrasting colours.
Thank you for pointing this out, I'll see if I can up the contrast!
to transcend both male and female is to be, and I thought this was obvious, transgender. everyone I've seen pushing against nonbinary inclusion in the trans community has used transphobic narratives to make their point. of course, no one should force all nonbinary people to identify with the word trans specifically (or binary people for that matter), but we all need to understand that that's what being nonbinary fundamentally is.
when laws are passed against nonbinary people, it's because they're trans. when they're disrespected for being nonbinary, it's for being transgender. when there's no space for them in society besides cringe compilations and jokes, that's happening to them because they are trans people. when people refuse to believe that their gender is nonbinary, it's because they are a part of the transgender community. the people doing these things to them are transphobic and they see nonbinary people as super [t slur]s. they are threatened by even the mere suggestion that there's more than 2 options because all forms of transness threaten cissexism and heteronormativity, even the entire concept of gender. you could say that they are phobic, even. ya know, of the transition. from binary to nonbinary.
if another trans person tells you that you don't count, that what you go through is disqualified just because you're nonbinary, it's because they're suffering from a severe case of internalized transphobia (as well as ignorance of trans history, ideology, gender theory, and purpose). they need too much help themselves to stand by you, do not engage with them. you are not taking from the community by increasing the demand for rights, support, and resources, that's not how supply and demand works. there is no limit to how many types of people can receive kindness because respect for other people is a renewable resource. in fact, if more people ask for more rights and respect and put effort into facilitating that acceptance for others, it's way more likely to increase the level of joy in the world. it's like a collective pursuit of happiness, and everyone will be better off working together.
also, if you're wondering how a person, even a binary one, who would usually be considered trans could not identify as trans (in a non-transphobic way), all you have to do is go "lol no" and boom. not trans. just think "I'm transgender to YOU" and "am I transgender? no, it's the cis people who are trans, identifying as made-up genders and shit," and there you go. welcome to cis manhood, womanhood, and/or nonbinaryhood. as Ms. Frizzle would say, "take chances, make mistakes, get messy!" it is the "do what you want the rules are fake and baseless anyway" community after all
Nix, They/Them, Queer, 20s Sporadically active.Do not gender me.
368 posts